If you have Type 2 Diabetes, you know that managing it is a big part of your life. So if you have a partner, whether it's a husband or wife, your diabetes is a part of their life too. In fact, research has shown that having a supportive partner can help you manage your condition better. And when you work as a team, the bond between you and your partner can be strengthened.
How does diabetes affect your partner?
This is very obvious, but we have to say it. The person you live with who is most affected by your diabetes is your spouse. Your condition can put a lot of pressure on them, both mentally and physically. Sometimes, this can even lead to new problems between you and your partner.
It's very common for your partner to worry about things like this.
| Fear/anxiety that may arise for the partner | A simple explanation about it |
|---|---|
| Fear of serious health complications | He may be afraid of serious things, such as losing his eyesight or having to have his legs amputated due to diabetes. The feeling that you will be in trouble is a great stress for him. |
| Fear of emergencies | He may not know what to do if your blood sugar suddenly drops (hypoglycemia) or rises (hyperglycemia). If you faint, he may be very afraid of what he will do on his own. |
| Fear of family responsibilities | He may wonder if you can't handle the kids, the housework, and other responsibilities. He may wonder, "How are we going to move our family forward with this?" |
| Questions about money and insurance | He may also be worried about financial issues, such as how to pay for diabetes medication and doctor visits, and whether he has insurance coverage and whether it is sufficient. |
If you don't talk about these issues openly, these pressures can take a toll on your relationship over time. So, let's talk about some ways you can strengthen your bond as you navigate this new normal.
How can the two of you go on this journey together?
This is not a journey you can take alone. If you both come together, overcoming this challenge is easier than you think.
Inform your partner.
The better you understand your diabetes, the better you can manage it. This story applies equally to your partner.
Learn about diabetes together. You both need to be aware of the dangers of high and low blood sugar levels, insulin and other medications, the value of exercise, and the best diet to control blood sugar. It's best to bring your doctor with you when you go to see him. It's also a good idea to both attend educational programs at diabetes clinics. That way, he'll have a clear understanding of this too.
Discuss what your responsibilities are.
Every family, every relationship is different. You may be happy to have your partner check on your insulin and suggest new diabetes-friendly recipes. But for someone else, those same things may feel like an "eating disorder," trying to control themselves.
The most important thing here is to talk openly and clearly about how the two of you can work together to help you stay as healthy as possible.
Don't think, "If I make him do all this work, it will be a burden on him." Also, don't expect him to be the one to take care of you 24 hours a day. Ask him how he would like to help. And be honest about what kind of support you expect from him. By setting clear expectations and boundaries in this way, you can both avoid the stress that can arise from not helping or from helping too much.
Make both lifestyle changes together.
Managing diabetes means making a complete lifestyle change. A healthy diet, regular exercise, and stress reduction are essential parts of your medical treatment. That may mean doing things like cooking at home or going to the gym. These changes can have a big impact on your partner's daily life, too.
It is very difficult to form new habits and maintain them if you do not face these challenges as a team.
Find new foods that you can enjoy together. Start physical activities that you can do together, like going for a 30-minute walk after dinner. For example, you could go for a bike ride together on the weekend. These things will benefit not only you, but both of you.
Don't hesitate to get outside help.
If you feel like you and your partner are struggling to manage your diabetes, couples counseling may be a good solution. Whether you've been diagnosed with diabetes for a while or for a long time, a counselor can help you improve communication and make your health a shared goal.
You can also get support from diabetes support groups. These groups can help you feel like you're not alone, that you're not the only one. They can also give you good advice and ideas from others. Ask your doctor or diabetes educator about groups in your area.
Take-Home Message
- Diabetes is something that affects not only you, but also your partner. This is a journey for both of you.
- Open and honest communication between the two of you is the key to a strong relationship. Say what you think, and what he thinks.
- Inform your partner about your diabetes, its risks, and its management. Take them with you when you see your doctor.
- Make lifestyle changes like diet and exercise together, not alone. It's good for both of you, as well as your relationship.
- If you're having trouble resolving issues, never hesitate to seek help from a couples counselor or support group. Asking for help is a sign of strength.
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