Do you get angry easily too? Let's talk about anger management!

When you try to park your car, the person next to you stops because there is not enough space. That feeling that comes to your mind at that moment, the feeling of your chest pounding, your hands shaking... That is what anger is. Sometimes you look in the mirror at someone you are passing in front of in traffic and scold them in your mind, you shout when you lose a cricket match, a small child bites another person when they don't get what they want, a young child closes the door and goes to their room... All of these are rooted in this feeling of anger.

Simply put, what is anger management?

Anger management is the way we deal with and manage anger when we feel it. It is also a type of talk therapy (known as `Cognitive Behavioral Therapy`) that is done with a mental health counselor , either individually or in a group setting. You may even be able to attend a class on the subject.

In this therapy, you will be helped to identify when you feel angry and develop the methods and strategies you need to deal with those feelings in a healthy way. You will learn about:

• What makes you angry and how do people express that anger?
• About how to solve problems and communicate.
• About relaxation techniques.

In some cases, your counselor may recommend that you see a doctor. This is because persistent anger may be due to another mental health issue, such as depression or anxiety . In such cases, a doctor may prescribe medication to help.

What exactly is this anger?

Anger is a strong emotion that arises in our mind in response to a situation, motivating us to make a change. When this emotion occurs, a part of our nervous system, the ``Sympathetic Nervous System``, is activated and prepares the body for the ``fight-or-flight response`` .

During this time, many changes occur in our bodies. Our heart rate and breathing rate increase. Stress hormones are released, and more blood flows to our muscles. Your attention becomes more focused. All of this gives you the strength you need to survive a danger.

However, anger doesn't always arise from a physical threat. We can also get angry in social situations. For example:

• When there is a conflict of opinion with a friend or family member.
• When you see injustice.
• When your needs are not met.
• When someone makes fun of you.

What happens if anger is not expressed properly?

If you suppress your anger, it can affect the way you think and behave. It can also cause or worsen a number of physical illnesses. If you are constantly angry, doctors call this condition ``chronic anger'' . Here are some of the health problems that can arise from this condition.

So is anger a bad thing?

No. Anger is a very normal and natural emotion . It can be good or bad. It depends on how you respond to that emotion.

Think about the parking incident mentioned earlier. You could wait a minute, let your anger subside, and then go somewhere else. Or you could get out of the car and write a note on the windshield of the other car and drive away.

In both cases, you felt angry. But in the first case, you recognized the anger and let it go. In the second case, you took that anger out on someone else, and you may have carried it around throughout the day.

Who needs this anger management treatment?

In fact, learning anger management techniques can be beneficial for everyone. Especially if you have a mental health condition, this type of therapy can make a big difference in your quality of life and relationships. This can be especially important for people with the following conditions:

What happens in therapy?

In this therapy, you learn techniques to help you understand what makes you angry and how that anger makes you feel. Your counselor may ask questions like:

• What kind of things make you angry?
• What are you really angry about? Is the level of your anger appropriate to the incident?
• Is there another emotion hiding behind your anger? (e.g. fear, anxiety, hurt, shame)
• Is this a response you learned from childhood?
• How does your body feel when you get angry?

Then, you and your counselor will develop coping skills and strategies to deal with these situations. These are practical things you can use when you feel angry.

• Changing the way you think (Cognitive Restructuring): Instead of dwelling on negative thoughts, you learn to look at events in a different way. Instead of thinking things like, "This is the worst thing that has ever happened to me," you learn to think more realistically, like, "This is bad, and it's fair to feel sad about it, but it's not the end of the world."

• Good communication skills: You will learn to express your anger in a healthy way. You will learn different ways to talk about your feelings and think before you react.

• Relaxation techniques: These techniques can help you to slow down before reacting when you are angry. They can also help you to stop thinking about a problem and not dwell on it (rumination). These include things like meditation, deep breathing exercises, or yoga .

You will practice these new techniques with your counselor during therapy sessions. You will also be encouraged to practice them at home. It is important to practice until the number of times you get angry or the intensity of your anger decreases and these techniques become natural to you.

What are the benefits of these treatments?

With anger management therapy, you will notice that your relationships at home and at work will improve. You will feel more in control of your emotions. It may even help you sleep better and protect you from certain diseases.

Are there any risks?

You may feel uncomfortable talking about your feelings in counseling. Once you and the counselor have established a good rapport, you can ask questions about past hurts. However, dealing with these difficult thoughts and memories is sometimes a necessary step in order to improve your daily life.

When should you see a doctor?

If your symptoms get worse, or if you feel like you might harm yourself or others, see a doctor immediately .

Anger is a normal part of being human. But sometimes it can get out of control. If you find yourself getting angry all the time, or if you've hurt someone you love with your harsh words or actions, learning ways to control your anger can be very helpful.

Anger, Anger Management, Mental Health, Counseling