Is it hard to solve family problems alone? Let's talk about Family Therapy!

Is it hard to solve family problems alone? Let's talk about Family Therapy!

Home is the safest and most loving place for all of us. But sometimes, there are tensions, disagreements, and resentments within this home, right? Whether it's between a mother and child, between siblings, or between husband and wife, these problems can put a lot of pressure on the entire family. So, at times like these, how great would it be if we could get help to resolve these problems and restore family happiness? That's what family therapy is for.

Simply put, what is Family Therapy?

Family Therapy is a type of psychotherapy that is done as a group. Simply put, it is a 'talking therapy'. The focus here is on improving relationships, behaviors, and communication patterns within a family.

When you think of 'family', you may think of only mom, dad, and children. But in Family Therapy, 'family' is much broader. It can include:

  • Parents and children
  • Brothers and sisters
  • Adults like grandparents
  • Aunts and uncles
  • Sometimes even very close friends of the family.

This treatment is led by a licensed mental health counselor who has received special training in this field. That is, someone like a psychologist or counselor. They look at family problems from an outside, impartial perspective and provide the family with the guidance, education, and support they need to understand each other, communicate better, and resolve problems.

In what situations does Family Therapy help?

There can be many reasons to seek therapy as a family. Think of situations like these.

  • Adapt to new changes in life: For example, moving to a new home, a child starting school, or a family member developing a serious illness (e.g. cancer) can require the entire family to help cope.
  • Challenges that come with aging: Issues that arise when caring for elderly parents in the family, and how to deal with their health conditions.
  • Coping with grief when a family member dies: The loss of a loved one affects everyone. This can help you get through the grieving process by supporting each other.
  • Relationship problems: Frequent conflicts between parents and children, anger and resentment between siblings, and problems between husband and wife.

Additionally, if one family member has a mental health condition, it is also important to seek support from the rest of the family in treating it. For example, if a family member has a condition that affects eating abnormally, such as anorexia, the entire family participating in treatment together can greatly strengthen that person's recovery.

What are the different methods of Family Therapy?

There is no single way to do family therapy. The counselor will choose the most appropriate treatment method based on your family's needs and the nature of the problem. Sometimes, elements of several methods are combined and used. Here are some of the main methods.

Therapy Type Simply put, what happens with this?
Functional Family Therapy (FFT) This is especially useful for families with children who have behavioral problems (such as impulsiveness, disobedience to rules). It helps to understand the family patterns that influence the child's misbehavior and improve family communication and parenting methods.
Marriage Counseling/Couples Therapy It is used for problems between married or dating couples. It provides guidance in resolving issues such as communication problems, financial problems, and disagreements about how to raise children.
Strategic Family Therapy This is a short-term treatment method. The focus here is on creating positive changes in the family environment. The counselor suggests specific methods and strategies to solve the family problem.
Structural Family Therapy This method looks at the 'structure' of a family. That is, the relationships between family members, how power is distributed, and how rules and boundaries are set. This method suggests that family problems can be solved by identifying and changing the problems in this structure.
Systemic Family Therapy Here, family issues are not looked at in isolation. They are linked to the wider social, cultural, and religious environment in which the family lives. This attempts to understand how the behavior of one family member affects others and how all of this is part of a larger system.

If a family member is receiving treatment for a mental health condition, 'psychoeducation' is also an important part of this therapy. This means that the counselor clearly explains to the family about the mental condition, its causes, treatment, and outlook.

What other problems does this solve?

The range of problems that can be helped with through Family Therapy is very wide.

Problems in normal family life

  • Distant relationships between family members.
  • Constant stress.
  • Uncontrollable anger.
  • Communication deficiencies (not understanding what each other is saying, frequent fights).
  • Traumatic events experienced by the family.
  • When a family member suffers from a long-term illness (e.g., `Multiple Sclerosis`, `Cancer`, `Stroke`), adapt to that situation.
  • Divorce or relationship breakdowns.
  • Facing sudden changes (losing a job, moving to another area).

If a family member has a mental health condition

  • Anxiety disorders - for example, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD).
  • Eating disorders - e.g. Anorexia.
  • Mood disorders - e.g. Bipolar disorder, Depression.
  • Personality disorders - e.g. Borderline Personality Disorder.
  • Schizophrenia is emotional .
  • Drug or alcohol addiction (`Substance use disorder`).

Behavioral problems in children

  • Conduct disorder (behavior that harms others and breaks the rules).
  • Oppositional defiant disorder (ODD) (behavior that is often oppositional and angry towards adults).

Additionally, families with children with conditions such as `Autism Spectrum Disorder` or `Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)` can also benefit greatly from family therapy.

How to find a good family therapist?

Finding a good, experienced counselor can be a bit of a challenge, but don't be discouraged.

  • Ask your family doctor: If you ask your regular doctor about this, he or she may be able to recommend a good professional.
  • Ask trusted people: Ask a friend or relative you trust about this.
  • Use the Internet: You can also find information through the websites of organizations such as the Sri Lankan Psychological Association.

Make sure the person you choose is a government-approved, licensed professional. Also, look for someone who has experience with your family's specific issues (e.g., divorce, child behavior). Before choosing a counselor, it's a good idea to ask questions like these:

  • How long have you been providing this treatment?
  • What do you think is the most appropriate treatment for our family?
  • How much time will we need to allocate for the entire treatment process?

How does this treatment process happen?

Family Therapy is a safe environment where families can talk openly and without judgment. Because the counselor looks at the family's problems from an impartial, outside perspective, he or she can help the family understand aspects that are not obvious to them.

The advisor can do things like:

  • Each family member is asked individually about their problems, challenges, and expectations from these treatments.
  • Encourages everyone to talk and listen carefully to what others have to say.
  • Explaining each other's words and feelings helps everyone understand the other person.
  • Helps you understand how your words and actions affect others.
  • Discusses how we can work together to create positive change.
  • Suggests ways to change problematic behaviors and patterns.

For this therapy to be successful, it is essential that everyone involved is honest, open, and willing to make positive changes. Trust between the counselor and the family is the most important thing in this journey.

The number and duration of therapy sessions varies from family to family. Sometimes issues can be resolved in just a few sessions. In more complex cases, it can take months or longer.

What are the benefits of Family Therapy?

Research has even found that Family Therapy is a very effective treatment for many mental and emotional problems.

  • About 90% of those who received treatment reported an improvement in their emotional health.
  • About 66% of people have even reported an improvement in their overall physical health.
  • In parent-child issues, about 73% of parents reported that their child's behavior had improved.

With this advancement, it is possible to perform better at work or even at school.

Are there any disadvantages or risks to this?

Family therapy is not for everyone. If one family member is reluctant to participate, it can lead to increased family conflict. It's also normal to feel a little uncomfortable and sad when talking about painful things from your past, such as fears. A good counselor can help you work through those feelings.

For treatment to be successful, it is important that participants do the following:

  • Being honest and open with the advisor.
  • Commitment to creating positive change.
  • Following the agreed treatment plan.
  • Doing things like homework assignments given by the instructor exactly.

When should you see a doctor or counselor?

If you feel that your discomfort, anxiety, or depressive symptoms are getting worse during treatment, let your counselor or doctor know immediately.

Most importantly: If you or someone in your family is having thoughts of harming themselves, please don't keep it to yourself. See a doctor immediately or go to the nearest hospital emergency room (ETU). Getting help is the most important thing.

Even the thought of talking to someone else about family problems can be overwhelming, but taking that step can be the best decision you can make for the happiness and well-being of your family.

Take-Home Message

  • Family Therapy is a talk therapy method that involves working together as a family and working with a trained professional to improve family relationships and communication.
  • This can help find solutions to many problems, such as frequent fights, disagreements, mental stress, and the mental health of a family member.
  • For this treatment to be successful, the sincere participation and dedication of everyone in the family is essential.
  • If you are suffering from family problems, don't be afraid to ask for help. A qualified professional can show you the way to happiness again.

family therapy, family counseling, mental health, family relationships, parent-child relationships, couples therapy, mental health

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