Thinking about moving your parent, or someone you love, into a special care facility due to a progressive memory loss condition is a difficult and sensitive decision. We know it's not easy. However, conditions like dementia and Alzheimer's disease tend to get worse over time. When these conditions become severe, it can be very difficult for family members to care for them at home. Therefore, it's best to discuss this, research it thoroughly, and make a calm decision before the symptoms worsen.
What exactly is 'Memory Care'?
Simply put, this is not your average nursing home. 'Memory Care' is a service specifically designed for people with memory and thinking problems, or what is medically known as cognitive impairments. These centers have staff trained to provide specialized care for those suffering from dementia, severe cases of Alzheimer's disease, or other memory-loss disorders.
In such a place, the patient is provided with various activities that are beneficial to their physical and mental well-being, such as preparing meals, cleaning, and washing clothes. Also, special attention is paid to the safety of the patients. For example, special safety locks are installed on the doors so that they cannot go out on their own. Also, pictures or visual cues are used to help them do things on their own. These centers may be run independently or may operate as part of a larger hospital or nursing home.
8 Signs That You Need Memory Care
There are no hard and fast rules for when someone will need full-time care. However, if you notice changes in your loved one's behavior, appearance, and other aspects of their daily life, you may be able to tell if they need more attention and specialized care. A doctor can run tests to determine if their cognitive impairment is increasing. Here are some important signs to look for.
| Warning sign | What does this mean? |
|---|---|
| 1. Forgetting to pay bills | Anyone can forget to pay a bill from time to time. However, if they consistently forget to pay things like their telephone bill or electricity bill, and they can't figure out why, it's something to be concerned about. |
| 2. Neglect of personal hygiene and homework | A person who used to be very clean now doesn't bathe, change clothes, or sweep the floor? Perhaps they have forgotten how to do those things. |
| 3. Feeling unsafe in one's own home | Do you forget to turn off the gas stove? Do you constantly fall inside the house? Do you get lost when you go out alone and can't find your way? These are very dangerous warnings. |
| 4. Not taking care of their health | Do you forget to take your medication? Or do you take too much medication? Can't remember the day you last saw the doctor? Do you skip meals? These can make your condition worse. |
| 5. Loss of sense of time | In the early stages of the disease, you may forget the day and then remember it again. But if you forget things like the current year, month, or weather (e.g., whether it's rainy or sunny), it's a serious sign. |
| 6. Withdrawing from hobbies and social interactions | Are you no longer doing the things you used to enjoy (e.g., reading, gardening)? Are you avoiding talking to friends or going to family events? Loneliness can worsen dementia symptoms. |
| 7. Fear for your safety | In some severe cases of dementia, patients can become aggressive and violent. If you are worried that they might harm you, you should think about that. |
| 8. You too are tired as a caregiver. | Are you mentally and physically exhausted from taking care of them? Don't you have time to do your own work and take care of your health? Your well-being is equally important. |
Look for these things when choosing a memory care center
A good center should primarily have things like safety and comfort, a kind and well-trained staff, activities appropriate for patients, and a location that is easy for family to visit.
When you visit a center, be prepared to ask the director these questions:
- Are there always a doctor and nurse on duty?
- How many staff members are allocated to each patient? (staff-to-client ratio)
- What kind of training does the staff receive regarding 'Memory Care'?
- Do employees quit all the time?
- What kind of medical services are provided here?
- What are the daily activities for patients? How often does that schedule change?
- What kind of security measures have been taken? Do you check the background of the staff?
- Are patients grouped according to their level of illness?
- How do you manage patients who are sometimes disruptive and aggressive?
- How do you prepare meals? (Ask for a menu.)
- How often are families informed about the patients' health status?
When you visit the center, see if it is well-lit, clean, and easy to walk around. See if the patients are just watching TV, bored, or happily engaged in an activity. Also, see if the staff is willing to answer your questions.
If possible, talk to the patients there. If any of their family members are there, ask them about the place. It's very valuable to hear from someone who's been there.
Let's also be aware of the cost involved.
The cost of such centers varies. Since these are often run by the private sector in Sri Lanka, the cost can be relatively high. Therefore, research carefully before making such a decision. Some families use their savings or income from property for this. Some health insurance policies may cover a portion of the cost. Therefore, check with your insurance company about your insurance policy.
Where to get help
If you have questions about cognitive decline, Alzheimer's, dementia, or long-term care, talk to your family doctor first. He or she can guide you properly.
In addition, there are organizations in Sri Lanka that help and educate about this. The Lanka Alzheimer's Foundation is one such major organization. You can get more information and guidance on this by contacting them through their website or phone number.
Take-Home Message
- Placing your loved one in a memory care facility is a difficult decision, but sometimes, it may be the best decision for their safety and well-being.
- If your loved one is showing one or more of the warning signs mentioned in the article, talk to your doctor about it.
- When choosing a center, carefully research its safety, staff training, and how patients are treated.
- It's normal to feel tired as a caregiver. You too need rest and support. It's not selfish to think about that.
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