Let's talk about traveling with holiday depression.

Are you ready to go to the village for the New Year or Christmas? Are you looking forward to spending the holidays happily, gathering with family and old friends, eating delicious cookies from your mother's hands? But sometimes, when these holidays approach, you may not feel happy, but rather a lot of stress and sadness. In fact, if you are someone who feels sad and stressed during the holidays, even going on a trip may not feel like a dream, but like a terrifying experience that torments your heart. So, today we will talk about how to travel with the depression that comes with these holidays.

What can you expect when traveling with depression?

According to Philip Maskin, a professor of psychiatry at Columbia University, traveling affects each person differently.

On the one hand, moving to a new environment can be very good for your mind. Imagine that you are in a brand new place, on vacation, and you don't have to get up at 6 am to go to the office. With this new environment, many stressors will be reduced. Therefore, you can feel a great relief from the holiday blues.

But on the other hand, traveling these days is much more stressful than it used to be. We think that "the trip will go smoothly." But that's not what happens. Sometimes we have to sit in traffic on the city roads for hours, or wait in long queues at the airport. There are fewer flights than before, and even those that do are crowded, and the airport is more congested.

Simply put, when you're depressed, your frustration tolerance is very low. So, even something as small as your flight being delayed makes it hard for you to think, "Oh, that's a small thing."

Holiday Depression: Take Control

"No matter where you're going, it's essential to be well-prepared," says clinical psychologist Helen Grusd. "This preparation is your best vaccine against stress."

This preparation isn't about getting ready to wear clothes. "You have to be mentally prepared. How do you empower yourself to take control of this situation?"

The first step is to decide exactly what the purpose of your trip is. "Are you going to reconnect with family? Or are you just going to relax and have fun?" Next, you need to keep telling yourself: "I'm going to make this trip a success."

Grusz says to keep this phrase in mind like a mantra. "Things can happen that are out of your control. But you have to be prepared to think, 'I control everything I can control.'" When you're depressed, when something goes wrong, you feel like you can't control anything. But you can see the situation as a challenge. Then you can enjoy the challenge, instead of feeling like a victim.

The importance of setting goals before traveling

Professor Maskin advises setting some goals for your vacation. "First, think about the things you're going to enjoy about the trip. Then, set goals for yourself and your family. Ask yourself and your partner, 'What do we want from this trip?' "

However, the goals you set should be achievable. For example, if you are going fishing, is your goal to catch the biggest fish in the sea, or is it to relax and enjoy the trip with your partner or children? If you have something to gain from your vacation, especially if it is something you can share with the rest of your family, you can focus on that goal. Then you will not get bogged down in other things that are not really important.

Advantages of planning ahead

For those who suffer from holiday depression, planning ahead can help reduce stress and anxiety. If you’re going on a trip, plan to make it as easy as possible, says psychologist Elaine Rodino.

• Choose to travel on days when there are fewer crowds.
• Book flights at less crowded times at the airport.
• Be aware of the weather in advance. Ask the airlines what their refund policies are if flights are canceled.

"That way you can avoid being stuck in the airport for 18 hours, because that can really push someone who's already depressed even further," Rodino says.

Also, plan to get a good night's sleep before your trip, eat a good nutritious meal , and bring some snacks for the trip.

What if it's more than just 'Holiday Blues'?

When setting goals and planning, it's important to think about the joys of the journey ahead of time. "But sometimes people are in such a deep depression that they can't even think about anything joyful. When that happens, it's worth talking to your partner about it," says Maskin. "Or it's really important to talk to a close friend, a religious counselor, or a mental health counselor , which is your doctor."

Clinical depression is an illness, and there are treatments for it. "But some people don't want to ask for help, they think it's a sign of weakness. It's scary," Muskin emphasizes. If you think asking for help is a sign of weakness, think about this: Even the best athletes in the world have coaches. They're not ashamed to ask for help. A mental health counselor , like your doctor , is a great helper.

Having clinical depression doesn't mean you can't go on. But it's important to continue doing things that help you feel better. Keep a small card with you that lists your strengths and the coping techniques you use to help you stay mentally strong . These could be going for a walk, listening to music, drinking a glass of water, or talking to a friend. Look at the card often and remind yourself that you can control this situation. Also, if you have any medications you usually take, make sure to take them on time .

What do you do after arriving at your destination?

There are many reasons why you may be feeling sad even after you arrive at your destination. Here are some tips to help.

Use the 'HALT' method.

Give yourself permission to say "no" to things you don't want. We all say "yes" to everything because we want to please everyone. But that only leads to destruction. Use the word 'HALT' to constantly check your mood.

When you become aware of how you're feeling, you can say, "I'm a little tired, I'm going to lie down for a while" or "I'm not going to do this." Then you can choose the things you like and avoid the things you don't like.

A few more tips

• Practice Behavioral Activation: Things like getting up and going for a walk, listening to music, and laughing with everyone can boost your mood.
• Live in the present: When families get together for the holidays, old grudges and hurt feelings can surface. Think, "This is the person you are here with, not the person you were 20 years ago." Focus on the person you are now.
• Control your food and alcohol: The holidays are full of delicious food and drinks. Mom's cake, sweet cookies... Tell yourself, "I'll eat these a little, but not all the time." Also, be very careful about your alcohol intake. Alcohol can disrupt your sleep and mess with your mood. If you're recovering from alcohol addiction, it's best to avoid parties.
• Exercise: The holidays are a time to be kind to yourself. That means not only eating well, but also getting up in the morning and doing things like running or walking. When you take care of yourself physically, your mental needs will also be met. A daily walk can be like an antidepressant for some people.