Making your dream of becoming a mother or father a reality is sometimes not as easy as you think. After waiting for years for a child, suffering a lot, and finally seeking the help of a technology like IVF ( In Vitro Fertilization ), a lot of things come to mind. Among them, the main thought that comes to many people is, "If only we could have finished this journey in one go...". Simply put, the feeling of how great it would be to have twins at the same cost and with the same effort.
Why do so many people love twins so much?
The main reason for this is the high cost of IVF treatment. We all know that even in Sri Lanka, a single IVF cycle costs hundreds of thousands of rupees. Sometimes the treatment is not successful even the first time. So, if this treatment, which is done after spending all the money in hand, can complete the family at once, that is, if two babies are born, it is fair to see it as a great advantage.
"It was very expensive. We knew this was the only and last time we could do it. So how good would it be if we had twins? Because whether we had one child or two, the cost would be the same. So we thought of completing the family at once." - This is the opinion of a mother who had twin daughters through IVF treatment.
Besides cost, there are other reasons .
- The race against time: Time is precious, especially for women over 35. When you think you won't have enough time to try to get pregnant again and start another cycle of treatment, it's no wonder you're tempted to have two children in one pregnancy.
- Mental stress: The stress, sadness, and exhaustion that comes with going childless for years is overwhelming. So it feels good to be able to get rid of all of this at once.
- The idea that " twins are so cute": Some people like twins because they think they are so "cute". Also, some people find it convenient to be able to complete the task with one pregnancy and one delivery.
But why don't doctors like this? - Let's understand the risk
If you talk to your doctor and say, "I want twins," he'll probably try to talk you out of it. The reason is that, medically speaking , a twin pregnancy is a much riskier situation for both mother and baby than carrying a single baby .
"Many patients only think about getting pregnant in any way they can. They have a second thought about the potential risk of twins. Sometimes they don't realize how bad the 'bad outcomes' can be," says one specialist.
Let's understand these risks clearly from the table below.
| Who is at risk? | What can happen? |
|---|---|
| For the children who are waiting to be born |
|
| Risks to the mother |
|
These things can be scary to hear. But this does not mean that everyone who has twins will have these problems. Most twins are born healthy and well. However, it is important to remember that the risk is significantly higher than with a single baby .
Let's learn from experience.
Amanda, a mother who had twins through IVF, had to go into premature labor at 20 weeks and had to rest in bed for 11 weeks. In the end, her twins were born 8 weeks early.
She says something like this: "Go see what it's like to have a premature baby. Decide if it's a risk you can take. Because it's a lot of heartache. My children are 9 months old now, and they're doing well, but I worry about them all the time. I'm always worried about any long-term complications."
IVF can be expensive, but if premature babies are born, the cost of keeping them in the hospital for a long time - not only financially, but also emotionally - is much higher.
Awareness changes opinions.
The best part is that when these risks are clearly explained, many people who initially thought they wanted twins change their minds. One study even showed that after talking to their doctor about the risks of a twin pregnancy, the percentage of parents who want twins is reduced by about half.
The reason for this is that after years of suffering from infertility, the focus is solely on the goal of "getting pregnant" by any means necessary. But the bigger picture of pregnancy, childbirth, and raising children that comes after that is not seen at that time.
Taking care of healthy twins is not easy!
Imagine that you have healthy twins, born at the right time, without any complications. That's great. But taking care of them isn't easy.
One specialist, who is also the father of healthy twins, says: "It's a lot harder than people think. The real work starts when the babies are born. There's nothing more satisfying than coming home at the end of the day and having both babies jump up and hug you. And there's nothing more frustrating than having two people crying together in stereo."
Take-Home Message
- The main and best outcome of IVF treatment is to have one healthy child . It's not the number that matters, but the health of the child and the mother.
- If you're thinking about having twins, be open and honest about all the medical risks involved with your doctor.
- Don't make decisions that put the lives of the mother and the unborn child at risk by thinking about the cost of treatment. The cost and stress of treating a premature baby are much greater.
- Your doctor will decide how many embryos to transfer based on your age, health, and the quality of the embryos. Trust that professional advice.
- The ultimate goal should be to go home happy with a healthy baby. That's more important than whether you have one or two children.
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