What do you think when you hear the word 'breast cancer fighter'? (Breast Cancer) - Let's talk about these feelings

If you're dealing with breast cancer , you've probably heard things like, "You're a fighter," and "Stay strong and fight this battle." You've probably seen these slogans on T-shirts and social media posts with pink ribbons. They're meant to give you strength and courage. But what do you really think when you hear and see these words? Does everyone like the label "fighter"? Let's talk about this a little more openly.

The good idea behind the word "fighter"

First of all, we need to understand that when someone calls you a “warrior,” they often have a good intention behind it. They know how hard it is to live with cancer. So they use these words to give you courage, to encourage you, to remind you that you are not alone.

Think about it, when you look at cancer awareness programs, the word “fight” is used a lot. “Fight Against Cancer” and “Let’s Fight” try to eliminate the fear and helplessness associated with this disease and instead create a strong, positive feeling. For some people, this is a really powerful motivator. When you see yourself as a “fighter,” it gives you a lot of strength to face treatment and get through the hard days. There’s nothing wrong with that.

But… why doesn't everyone like this 'militant' label?

Here's the flip side of the story. Not everyone living with breast cancer likes the idea of ​​being a "fighter." There are several reasons for that.

• The pressure to always be strong: If you're a "fighter," society expects you to be brave and positive all the time. But is that true in real life? There are days when you feel sad, scared, and want to cry. Treatment (There are days when the body is very tired due to chemotherapy . If you feel weak on one of those days, does that mean you are “losing the battle”? This pressure itself can be a big burden sometimes.

• This is not a battle we chose: A battle is usually something that someone enters by choice. But cancer is not like that. It is not something that anyone wants to get; it is a disease that occurs in the body. So for some, when they say this is a “battle,” they feel like they have been thrust into a battlefield against their will.

• The concept of “winning” and “losing”: With the word “battle” come the words “winning” and “losing.” If the cancer is cured, that person is said to have “won the battle.” So, if a person dies of cancer, does that mean that the person “lost the battle”? Did he “not fight well”? This is a very unfair and painful idea. A person’s life depends on medical factors such as how successful the treatment is and what the nature of the cancer is, not on the “fighting spirit” of that person.

• Simplifying the experience: The cancer journey is a complex one. There are many things to consider, including pain, surgery (like a mastectomy), side effects of treatment, financial issues, impact on family, and emotional breakdowns. When you boil it all down to one word, “battle,” some people feel like the depth of the experience is lost.

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If this isn't a "battle", then what is this?

If you don't like the label "militant," you can use other words to describe your experience. This is entirely your decision. Some people see their experience this way.

The most important thing is that you have the right to choose the words you feel are most appropriate to describe your experience. You don't need anyone's permission to do that.

Let your feelings be – that's the most important thing.

The main thing we need to understand from this whole story is that there is no right or wrong way to express your feelings.

• If you feel like a “fighter,” if that feeling gives you strength, that's great. Go on your journey with that strength.
• If you still feel angry when you hear that word, if you feel sad, that feeling is 100% justified. You have every right to feel that way.

Talk to a close friend, family member, or doctor about your feelings. Sometimes, it can be helpful to seek professional help from a counselor. The important thing is not to fit a label, but to find a way to help you through this difficult time.

How exactly should we, as people around us, help?

If a family member or friend has breast cancer, you can support them. But you have to do it in a way that suits them.

• Before you say, “You’re a fighter,” ask them how they feel. Listen to their feelings.
• Instead of encouraging with words , help in practice . Ask things like, “Can I make you some food?”, “Can I come to the hospital with you?”, “Do you need help with the housework?” These are much more valuable than empty words.
• Stop saying, “Be strong,” and say, “It’s okay to feel sad, I’m with you.” Allow them to feel all their feelings.

Ultimately, this is your journey. You get to decide what name you give it. It could be a “battle,” it could be a “journey,” or it could be anything. All are fine.