Mwanasikana wako anouya kumba achibva kuchikoro akasuruvara zvikuru here? Haanyemwereri uye haatauri sezvaaimboita here? Anogara mukamuri make ega here? Kana kuti anochema nekuti haakwanise kuenda kuchikoro here? Paunoona zvinhu izvi, ungafunga kuti, "Pamwe ari kungonzwa kusagadzikana mazuva ano." Zvisinei, izvi zvinogona kuva kutanga kwenyaya yakadzama. Uku kushungurudzwa neshamwari, kana sezvatinozviziva tese, ' kushungurudzwa '.
Zvatinofunga nezvazvo patinoti 'kushungurudza' uye chii chinoitika chaizvo
Patinofunga nezvekushungurudzwa, tinowanzo funga nezvemukomana mukuru, ane hutsinye kuchikoro anoba chikafu nemari yemwana asina simba. Kureva, kushungurudzwa panyama. Asi nhasi uno, kunyanya pakati pevasikana, hunhu hwekushungurudzwa uku hwachinja zvakanyanya.
Vanachiremba nenyanzvi dzepfungwa vanoti kushungurudzwa uku kunoreva hukama kana (Relational Aggression) . Zvichitaurwa zviri nyore, apa ndipo paunoshandisa hushamwari, makuhwa, makuhwa, uye kusabatanidzwa sezvombo zvekukuvadza mumwe munhu. Fungidzira, shamwari dzepedyo dzemwanasikana wako dzinoungana pamwe chete dzomupa tsamba dzichiti, "Hatichazombotauri newe zvakare," "Usatitarisa," uye "Usaswedera pedyo nesu." Kunyangwe usingazvinzwi panyama, unonzwa kurwadziwa kwakadini?
Dzimwe nguva, maronda anokonzerwa nemashoko anogona kugara kwenguva yakareba kupfuura anokonzerwa nechisimba. Marwadzo iwayo anogona kugara kweupenyu hwese.
Tsvagiridzo inoratidza kuti 76% yevana vezera rekuenda kuchikoro vanoshungurudzwa nenzira iyi. Mune dzimwe nguva dzakanyanya, mwana asingakwanise kutsungirira kushushikana kwepfungwa uku anogona kutoedza kuzviuraya. Iye zvino wava kunzwisisa kuti mamiriro ezvinhu aya akakomba sei.
Sei vana vachiita zvinhu zvakadai?
Tinowanzo funga kuti vana vasina chivimbo, vasina simba muzvidzidzo, uye vasingagamuchirwi nevanhu ndivo vanoshungurudza vamwe. Asi chokwadi chakasiyana zvachose.
Kazhinji, zvinhu izvi zvinoitwa nevasikana vanozivikanwa kuchikoro, vanokwezva kutariswa nemunhu wese, vakanaka, uye vane chivimbo chakanyanya. Vanozviita nekuti 'vanogona' kuzviita. Vanoita zvinhu izvi kuti vatonge vamwe uye kuti varambe vari muboka ravo.
Pamwe mwana ari kushungurudzwa 'akasiyana' neimwe nzira. Pamwe nekuti ndiye mutungamiri wekirasi, kana kuti akahwina mutambo, kana kuti nekuti anodzidza zviri nani kupfuura vamwe. Kana kuti pamwe nekuti haana mbatya kana shangu dzinopfekwa nevamwe vana. Kunyangwe zvikonzero zvidiki zvakaita seizvi zvinogona kushandiswa kushora nekukuvadza mumwe munhu.
Mwana wako ari kushungurudzwa here? Chenjerera zviratidzo izvi
Kazhinji, vana havaudzi vabereki vavo nezvezvinhu izvi zviri kuitika kwavari, saka zvakakosha kuti muzive zviratidzo izvi zvekunyevera.
| Yambiro | Tsananguro |
|---|---|
| Kuchinja kwemaitiro | Kamwe kamwe unobva wanyarara, wasuruvara, watsamwa nekukurumidza, kana kugara wega mumba mako. |
| Kusada kuenda kuchikoro | Kugara uchiti "Handikwanise kuenda kuchikoro," uye usingade kumuka mangwanani. |
| Kurwara kakawanda | Kunyunyuta kakawanda nezvekurwadziwa kwemudumbu nemusoro pasina chikonzero. |
| Kuchinja kwemaitiro ekurara uye ekudya | Kunetseka nekurara, kurota hope dzakaipa, kushaya chido chekudya kana kudya zvakanyanya. |
| Handitauri nezveshamwari | Kusataura chero chinhu nezveshamwari dzawaimbotaura nadzo kakawanda kana kudzidzivisa kana wabvunzwa nezvadzo. |
Zvinhu zvaunogona kuita semubereki
1. Teerera mwana wako: Kana mwana wako akakuudza nezvenyaya iyi, usazviregeredza.Pane kuti, "Ndizvo zvazviri chaizvo," nyatsoteerera mwana wako womuvimbisa kuti, "Izvi hazvisi mhosva yako. Hausi wega, ndinewe."
2. Tsvaga nzvimbo yakanakisisa yekutaura: Kana usingade kutaura uri kumba, taura uri panzvimbo yakasununguka, senge mumota kana paunenge uri panze. Pane kubvunza zvakananga kuti, "Ndiani ari kukunetsa?", edza kubvunza nezveshamwari dzako, sekuti, "Sarah ari sei? Hausi kutaura naye izvozvi here?"
3. Zivisa chikoro: Izvi zvakakosha zvikuru. Enda kuchikoro nekukasika utaure nemudzidzisi wekirasi uye mupi wezano wechikoro nezvenyaya iyi. Kuzivisa vadzidzisi nezvenyaya iyi kunogona kuve nechokwadi chekuti mwana akachengeteka mukirasi.
4. Taura nevamwe vabereki: Taura nevabereki veshamwari dzemwana wako nezvenyaya iyi. Pamwe vamwe vana vari kusanganawo nezvinhu zvakafanana.
5. Tsvaga mazano echiremba: Kana mwana wako ari kusangana nekushushikana kwakanyanya, kuzvidya mwoyo, kana zviratidzo zvekuora mwoyo, iva nechokwadi chekubvunza chiremba wemhuri yako kuti akupe mazano. Unogona zvakare kumutumira kuna chiremba wepfungwa wevana kana zvichidikanwa.
Ko kana mwana wako achishungurudzwa?
Kunyangwe zvingave zvakaoma kugamuchira, dzimwe nguva munhu anokushungurudza anogona kunge ari mwana wako wega. Zvakakosha kuziva izvi futi.
- Mwana wenyu anoronga mabiko here uye anosiya vamwe vana vachitarisirwa pasi nemaune?
- Unowanzo taura zvinhu zvakaipa nezvevamwe vana here, zvakaita sekuti "Anofinha zvechokwadi" kana kuti "Mbatya dzake dzakaipa"?
- Uri kutaura makuhwa nezveshamwari yako asipo here?
- Munhu aimbova shamwari yakanaka iye zvino adzoka kumba uye haachatauri newe?
Kana ukaona chimwe chinhu chakadai, pane zvinhu zvishoma zvaunogona kuita.
Kana mumwe mubereki akauya achiti, "Mwana wako ari kushungurudza mwana wangu," musakurumidza kugumbuka. Pane kutya, tangai maenda kuchikoro munoona kana nyaya yacho iri yechokwadi.
Wobva wataura nemwana wako uri wega, wakadzikama. "Ndakanzwa kuchikoro kuti uri kurwa nevamwe vana. Chii chiri kutaurwa nezvazvo?" Bvunza. Batsira mwana wako kunzwisisa kuti zvaari kuita zvakaipa uye kuti zvinorwadza sei mumwe munhu. Uyu mukana wakanaka wekudzidzisa mwana wako nezvezvakanaka nezvakaipa uye tsitsi. Dzimwe nguva vana vane maitiro akadai vangada kupiwa mazano . Taurawo nachiremba wako nezvazvo.
Mharidzo Yekuenda Nayo Kumba
- Kushungurudza hakusi kungoshungurudza panyama chete, asi kukuvadza pfungwa nemashoko nekudzivisa vamwe kwakaipawo.
- Taura nemwana wako nguva nenguva. Gadzira nzvimbo yekumba kwaunogona kutaura pachena nezveshamwari dzake nechikoro chake.
- Kana ukaona shanduko muhunhu hwemwana wako, usazviregeredza. Edza kutsvaga chikonzero chacho.
- Kana ukaona kuti pane munhu anoshungurudza vamwe, zivisa chikoro nekukasika. Tsvaga rubatsiro rwechiremba kana zvichidikanwa.
- Chinhu chinonyanya kukosha ndechekurera mwana wako kuti ave netsitsi uye mutsa.
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