Tonsefe tikufunafuna china chake m'moyo, sichoncho? Nthawi zina zinthu zimayendera bwino monga momwe zakonzedwera, koma nthawi zina, timakumana ndi "ayi" kapena "osati nthawi ino." Kukanidwa kumatha kumveka ngati chokumana nacho chovuta komanso chopweteka. Koma kodi mukudziwa? Ichi ndi gawo lofala kwambiri la moyo lomwe aliyense amakumana nalo nthawi ina.
Kodi Kukana ndi Chiyani?
Mwachidule, kukanidwa kumachitika pamene chinthu chomwe mukuyembekezera, chinthu chomwe mukuchilakalaka kwambiri, kapena chinthu chomwe mukupempha chakanidwa. Ichi chingakhale chochitika chachikulu, monga kukanidwa pambuyo pa kuyankhulana ntchito komwe mudagwira ntchito mwakhama. Kapena, chingakhale chochitika chaching'ono, cha tsiku ndi tsiku, monga pamene palibe amene akuseka nthabwala yomwe mudanena pakati pa anzanu. Mulimonsemo, zimapweteka, sichoncho?
N’chifukwa chiyani kukanidwa kumapweteka kwambiri?
Mwina mukudzifunsa kuti, "N’chifukwa chiyani mtima wanga umapweteka kwambiri chifukwa cha chinthu chaching’ono?" N’chifukwa chiyani kukanidwa kumatikhudza kwambiri?
Taganizirani izi: monga anthu, mwachibadwa timafuna kulandiridwa ndi ena, kukondedwa, ndikuphatikizidwa m'gulu. Ichi ndi chosowa chachikulu cha maganizo. Chifukwa chake, wina akatikana, mwachibadwa timamva kuti sitikufunidwa, kapena ngati sitili abwino mokwanira.
Chodabwitsa n'chakuti, kafukufuku wina wasayansi wapeza kuti ziwalo zomwezo za ubongo zomwe zimalembetsa ululu wakuthupi zimayambiranso kugwira ntchito tikamamva ululu wamaganizo chifukwa chokanidwa! Izi zikutanthauza kuti ubongo wathu umaonadi kupweteka kwamaganizo ngati mtundu wa "ululu." Ndicho chifukwa chake kukanidwa kungakhale kovuta kwambiri.
Zinthu zazikulu, zazing'ono - Kukanidwa kuli paliponse
Monga tafotokozera, kukanidwa sikungokhudza zochitika zazikulu zokha. Taonani zitsanzo izi:
- Popeza simunalowe nawo maphunziro aku yunivesite munagwira ntchito mwakhama komanso munkayembekezera zambiri.
- Poganiza kuti mwatsimikiza kulowa mu timu yamasewera ya kusukulu ( masewera ), dzina lanu silikupezeka pamndandanda.
- Munthu amene umamukonda amakunyalanyaza ndipo amalankhula mosangalala ndi aliyense pamene iwe uli pomwepo.
- Mnzanu amene munkamuona ngati "bwenzi lanu lapamtima" anapita paulendo osakuuzani.
Zimenezo ndi nthawi zofunika kwambiri komanso zopweteka. Koma palinso zochitika zazing'ono za tsiku ndi tsiku:
- Nthabwala imene munanena mu gulu sinasekedwe.
- Palibe amene anakusungirani mpando patebulo la nkhomaliro.
- Munatumiza uthenga kwa mnzanu, ndipo ngakhale kuti anauona, sanayankhe .
- Winawake akunena kuti chakudya chomwe mwaphika "sichikukoma."
Ngakhale zochitika zazing'ono ngati izi zingativutitse kwambiri zikachuluka. Zingakhudze kwambiri kudzidalira kwathu, kudzidalira, komanso momwe timadzionera tokha.
Kodi mumatani mukakana?
Ndiye, kodi mungatani kuti muthane bwino ndi mavuto ngati amenewa? Kodi mumachepetsa bwanji ululu, chisoni, ndi mkwiyo? Tiyeni tiwone pang'onopang'ono.
1. Mvetsetsani momwe mukumvera ndipo mupatseni mpata
Chofunika kwambiri ndi kusayesa kubisa momwe mukumvera mukakanidwa. Chisoni, mkwiyo, kukhumudwa, kapena mantha—zonsezi ndi malingaliro achibadwa a anthu. Musaganize kuti, "Kodi ine ndekha ndikumva chonchi?" kapena "Ndikumva chonchi chifukwa ndine wofooka." Ngati muli achisoni, tengani nthawi yoti mulire nokha. Ngati mwakwiya, fotokozani m'njira yomwe siidzakupwetekani kapena kukupwetekani wina aliyense (mwina mwa kuponya pilo kapena kuthamanga!). Kumvetsetsa malingaliro anu ndikudzilola kuti muwathetse ndi sitepe yoyamba yopita kuchireni.
2. Kumbukirani kuti simuli nokha
Izi ndizofunikira kwambiri. Zingakhale zovuta kupeza munthu m'dziko lino amene sanakanidwepo nthawi ina. Ngakhale anthu opambana kwambiri omwe mumawaona masiku ano—ochita sewero omwe mumakonda, oimba, othamanga, kapena amalonda—akanidwa kangapo m'miyoyo yawo. Vutoli silili lanu lokha; silili lokhalo. Kuzindikira izi kungakupatseni mpumulo ndikukuthandizani kuti musamadzimve kuti ndinu nokha.
3. 'Lankhulani' ndi maganizo anu oipa
Pamene kukanidwa kukuchitika, maganizo oipa omwe amatikhumudwitsa amayamba kuwunjikana. Zinthu monga "Ndilibe ntchito," "Palibe amene amandikonda," "Zinthu sizimandiyendera bwino," kapena "Zonsezi ndi zolakwa zanga." Maganizo amenewa akabuka, musamangowalandira ngati choonadi chenicheni.
Dzifunseni ngati malingaliro amenewo ndi oonadi komanso ngati ndi achilungamo.
Mwachitsanzo:
- Ngati mukuganiza kuti, "Ndine munthu wopanda pake," dzifunseni kuti, "Kodi zimenezo ndi zoona? Kodi sindinachitepo zinthu zabwino kale? Ndinachita izi bwino ndipo bwino, sichoncho?"
- Ngati mukuganiza kuti, "Palibe amene amandikonda," funsani kuti, "Kodi palibe amene amandikondadi? Makolo anga amandikonda, mnzanga nayenso amandikonda."
Mwa kutsutsa malingaliro anu oipa, pang'onopang'ono mungachepetse mphamvu zawo pa inu.
4. Mumadzisankhira nokha kufunika kwanu, osati wina aliyense
Kungoti winawake wakukanani, sizikutanthauza kuti kufunika kwanu kumatsika kufika pa zero. Kufunika kwanu, luso lanu, ndi khalidwe lanu sizimafotokozedwa ndi zomwe ena amakuganizirani kapena zisankho zomwe amapanga. Muli ndi umunthu wanu, maluso anu, ndi maloto anu. Yamikirani zinthu zimenezo. Kukanidwa ndi chochitika chimodzi chokha; musalole kuti chilamulire moyo wanu wonse kapena kudziona kuti ndinu ofunika.
5. Phunzirani kuchokera ku zomwe zachitikazi ndikusintha
Nthawi zina, tingaphunzire phunziro lofunika kwambiri kuchokera ku kukana kulikonse.
- Mwina mwazindikira kuti zomwe munkafuna sizinali zoyenera kwenikweni. Ngati ndi choncho, mungasankhe njira kapena cholinga chatsopano chomwe chikugwirizana bwino ndi umunthu wanu komanso zomwe mumakonda.
- Mwina mwazindikira kuti panali mipata yaying'ono mu khama lanu, ndipo ngati muikonza, zotsatira zake zingakhale zosiyana nthawi ina. Mutha kuchitapo kanthu kuti mutsimikizire kuti simukubwerezanso zolakwazo.
Kukana sikutanthauza kuti msewu watha; kungakhale kungotembenukira ku njira yabwino. M'malo moganizira zomwe zinachitika kapena kukhalabe mumsampha wakale, ganizirani zolinga zatsopano, zosangalatsa, ndi zochita.
6. Musaope kupempha thandizo
Ngakhale mutachita zonsezi, nthawi zina zimakhala zovuta kwambiri kuti mupite patsogolo nokha. Ululu ukhoza kukhala wovuta kwambiri. Munthawi ngati zimenezi, kulankhula ndi munthu amene mumamukhulupirira kungakupatseni mpumulo waukulu komanso chithandizo.
- Uyu akhoza kukhala bwenzi lanu lapamtima.
- Makolo anu, mchimwene wanu, kapena wachibale wanu.
- Mphunzitsi.
- Nthawi zina, ndikofunikira kupempha thandizo kwa katswiri wa zamaganizo, katswiri wa zamaganizo , katswiri wa zamaganizo , kapena katswiri wodziwa bwino ntchito yothandiza anthu odziwa bwino ntchito imeneyi. Musachite manyazi ndi izi kapena kuganiza kuti ndi chizindikiro cha kufooka. Monga momwe mungayendere ndi dokotala chifukwa cha malungo kapena chimfine, kufunafuna thandizo chifukwa cha kupsinjika maganizo ndi chisankho chanzeru komanso chabwino.
Kodi mumakhala bwanji olimba mukakana?
Kukanidwa ndi chokumana nacho chopweteka—palibe kukayika pa zimenezo. Koma sikuyenera kukufooketsani kwamuyaya. Ndipotu, mungagwiritse ntchito zokumana nazozi kuti mukhale olimba komanso okhoza kuthana ndi mavuto a moyo. Izi zimatchedwa kulimba mtima : kuthekera kochira msanga ku mavuto a moyo, zopinga, ndi zopinga.
- Dziwani luso lanu: Aliyense ali ndi luso lapadera. Fufuzani zomwe mumachita bwino komanso makhalidwe anu abwino, ndipo yang'anani kwambiri pakukulitsa luso lanu.
- Yesetsani kuganiza bwino:M'malo mowona chilichonse ngati chakuda kapena choyera, yesani kupeza mbali yabwino kapena china chake choti muphunzire pazochitika zonse.
- Kondwererani kupambana pang'ono: Mukamagwira ntchito yokwaniritsa zolinga zazikulu, yamikirani ndikusangalala ndi zomwe mwakwaniritsa pang'ono. Izi zidzakulitsa kudzidalira kwanu pang'onopang'ono.
- Yesetsani kudzimvera chisoni: Mukalakwitsa kapena kukanidwa, musadziimbe mlandu kapena kudzinyoza. Dzichitireni chifundo. Ganizirani kuti, "Ndili munthu, ndimatha kulakwitsa, ndimatha kumva malingaliro, ndipo zimenezo n'zachibadwa."
Kumbukirani nthawi zonse, si nkhani yogwa pansi, koma yodzukanso! Gwiritsani ntchito nthawi iliyonse yogwa ngati mwayi wodzuka mwamphamvu kwambiri.
Uthenga Wopita Nawo Kunyumba
Kuchokera pa zomwe takambirana lero, ziyenera kuonekeratu kuti kukanidwa ndi gawo la moyo wamba. Zitha kuchitika kwa aliyense, pa msinkhu uliwonse, nthawi iliyonse. Palibe amene ali otetezeka ku izi.
Chofunika kwambiri ndichakuti musalole kuti kukanidwa kukupangitseni kukhala ndi moyo wabwino. Phunzirani kumvetsetsa momwe mukumvera ndikuwathetsa mwanzeru. Ngati mukuona kuti n'zovuta kwambiri kuthana nazo nokha, musazengereze kupempha thandizo kwa munthu amene mumamudalira. Phunzirani maphunziro ofunika kuchokera pa chilichonse chomwe mwakumana nacho, khalani olimba, ndipo limbanani ndi moyo molimba mtima. Kumbukirani, ndinu wamphamvu kwambiri kuposa momwe mukuganizira!
Kukana, Thanzi la Maganizo, Kudzidalira, Kusamalira Maganizo, Kupirira, Uphungu
