Ènya alesi nàgblɔ nusi tututu le susu me na wò, bubutɔea? Mina míaƒo nu tso Assertiveness ŋu!

Egbea míele nu ƒom tso nu vevi aɖe ŋutɔ le míaƒe agbe me ŋu. Esia nye nusi akpe ɖe ŋuwò le xɔ̃wòwo, kple wò ƒomea, afisi nèwɔa dɔ le, afisi nèsrɔ̃a nu le, kpuie , le afisiafi. Emae nye Nyateƒetoto . Ðewohĩ èse nya sia kpɔ. Kpuie ko la, míeyɔa esia be ``Assertiveness`` ŋutete be nàgblɔ nusi le wò susu me, wò nuhiahiãwo, kple wò susuwo le mɔ si me kɔ, anukwareɖiɖi, kple bubudede ame ŋu nu , evɔ màwɔ nuvevi ɖokuiwò alo ame bubuwo o.

Nuka tututue nye ``Assertiveness''?

Bu eŋu kpɔ, `(Assertiveness)` nye nuƒoƒo ƒe mɔnu si le lãmesẽ me ko . Enye ŋutete si le asiwò be nàgblɔ wò susuwo le ɖokuiwò ŋu anukwaretɔe eye nàde bubu ame bubuwo ŋu. Míedoa go nɔnɔme geɖewo gbesiagbe. Eɖanye didi aɖe gbɔgblɔ na ame aɖe, nya aɖe biabia nufiala aɖe, alo nuƒoƒo nyuie le dɔ alo yunivɛsiti ƒe gbebiame me o, `(Assertiveness)` le vevie ŋutɔ.

Ke hã, `(Assertiveness)` sia menye nusi vaa amesiame dzi le dzɔdzɔme nu o. Ame aɖewo li, woƒoa nu ŋukpetɔe ŋutɔ (Too Passive) . Eyae nye be womegblɔa nusi le susu me na wo o, eye woʋuʋua ta ɖe nya siwo ame bubuwo gblɔna ŋu. Bubu aɖewo hã li, woƒe atsyã nyea adãwɔwɔ ŋutɔ (Too Aggressive) . Eyae nye be womebua ame bubuwo ŋu o, eye woawo ŋutɔ ƒe nuwo ŋu koe woƒoa nu tsoe hedoa ɣli. Eyata, `(Assertiveness)` siae nye titina tututu le nu eve mawo siwo gbɔ eme dome.

Nusiwo nana nèwɔa nu ``Assertive`` dometɔ aɖewoe nye esi:

• Àte ŋu agblɔ nusi nèsusu, alo agblɔ nusi nèsena le ɖokuiwò me.
• Àte ŋu abia nusi nèdi, nusi nèhiã.
• Àte ŋu alɔ̃ ɖe ame bubuwo ƒe nya dzi bubutɔe .
• Àte ŋu atsɔ wò susuwo kple aɖaŋuɖoɖowo aɖo ɖa.
• Àte ŋu agblɔ be "ao" evɔ màse le ɖokuiwò me be yeɖi fɔ o.
• Àte ŋu aƒo nu ɖe ​​ame bubu nu gɔ̃ hã.

Nukatae esia le vevie na mí alea gbegbe ɖo?

Dzeɖoɖo si me kakaɖedzi le kpena ɖe mía ŋu míekpɔa nusi míedi. Gake mewu enu ɖe ​​afima o. Ne míegblɔa nya ɖe ame ŋu vevie la, efia be míedea bubu mía ɖokui kple ame bubuwo ŋu.

Nuƒola siwo ƒoa wo ɖokui ɖe nya me la ɖoa gbedasi ɖa be yewoka ɖe yewo ɖokui dzi. Womevɔ̃na akpa alo ƒoa ame bubuwo fũ akpa o. Wonya be yewoƒe seselelãmewo kple nukpɔsusuwo le vevie. Woka ɖe edzi .

Ame siwo ƒoa wo ɖokui ɖe nya me la dzea xɔlɔ̃wo bɔbɔe. Woɖoa dze kple bubudede woawo ŋutɔ ƒe nuhiahiãwo kpakple ame bubuwo hã tɔ ŋu. Wobi ɖe masɔmasɔwo kple masɔmasɔwo gbɔ kpɔkpɔ hã me. Wodea bubu ame siwo dea bubu ame bubuwo ŋu la teƒe.

Ŋu kpea ame akpaa? Esẽ akpaa? Alo ɖeko wònyoa?

Aleke nàwɔ anya afisi nèle le ``Assertiveness'' dzidzenu sia dzi? Kpɔɖeŋu aɖewoe nye esi:

Nimali tɔ (Too Passive): Ne èbia Nimali be sinima kae wòdi be yeakpɔ hã la, ɖewohĩ agblɔ be, "Nyemenya o, oo... nukae nàdi be yeakpɔ?" Zi geɖe la, enaa ame bubuwo wɔa nyametsotsoawo, gake emegbe edoa dziku hegblɔna be, "Oo, nyemekpɔ nusi medi o." Esea veve hã be ye xɔlɔ̃wo koe le nu ƒom. Gake ne Nimali dze agbagba be yeawɔ ɖeka kple dzeɖoɖoa gɔ̃ hã la, eƒoa nu blewu ŋutɔ, eye ame bubuwo ƒoa nu ɖe ​​edzi le manyamanya me.

Surekha (Dzikutɔ akpa): Surekha mekpɔa kuxi aɖeke le eƒe susu gbɔgblɔ me o. Gake ne ewɔe la, eva dzena abe ame si ƒe gbe sesẽ ŋutɔ eye wòbua nukpɔsusu ene. Surekha ɖua dzeɖoɖoa dzi, eye zi geɖe la, etsoa nya me na ame bubuwo, eye ƒã hafi wòɖoa to nya siwo ame bubuwo gblɔna. Ne melɔ̃ ɖe wò nya dzi o la, ena nènya – gake zi geɖe la, etoa fewuɖunyawo gbɔgblɔ alo ame aɖe ƒe seselelãmewo veve me. Exɔ ŋkɔ be enye amegã ŋutɔ eye mebua ame bubuwo ŋu o.

Chamalge (Assertive): Ne èbia Chamal eƒe susu la, agblɔe na wò anukwaretɔe. Ne melɔ̃ ɖe wò nya dzi o la, agblɔe na wò – gake menye le mɔ si ana nàɖiɖi alo ana nàse le ɖokuiwò me be yeda ƒu o. Chamal hã tsɔ ɖe le wò nukpɔsusu me. Eɖoa to nya si nàgblɔ. Ne Chamal melɔ̃ ɖe wò nya dzi o hã la, èsena le ɖokuiwò me kokoko be edea bubu wò nukpɔsusu ŋu.

Nusi dzɔna ne míedzra nusi míesusu ɖo ɖe mía ɖokui (to passive)...

Zi geɖe la, ame siwo mewɔa naneke o akpa la ate ŋu ase le wo ɖokui me be ame bubuwo le yewo zãm. Woate ŋu ase veve, dziku, alo dziɖeleameƒo.

Ne ètsɔ wò tamesusuwo kple seselelãmewo de aŋetu me le ememe la, ame bubuwo mate ŋu anya wò ahase wo gɔme ŋutɔŋutɔ o. Wò susuwo kple aɖaŋuɖoɖowo maɖe vi aɖeke na ƒuƒoƒoa o.

Ne èva se le ɖokuiwò me be womedea asixɔxɔ yeƒe susuwo alo seselelãmewo ŋu o la, ate ŋu aɖe kakaɖedzi si le asiwò ɖe ɖokuiwò ŋu dzi akpɔtɔ . Ate ŋu aɖe mɔnukpɔkpɔ si li be woaxɔ wò susu nyuiwo ahawɔ nu ɖe ​​wo ŋu hã dzi akpɔtɔ. Esia ate ŋu ahe nɔnɔme aɖe abe blanuiléle ene gɔ̃ hã vɛ ɣeaɖewoɣi .

Ðo ŋku edzi be: wò gbe hã xɔ asi. Mègazi ɖoɖoe o!

Nukae dzɔna ne èwɔa adã akpa le nusianu me?

Ate ŋu asesẽ na ame siwo dzena abe ɖe wodoa adã akpa ene be woalé xɔlɔ̃wo. Woate ŋu aɖu ame bubuwo dzi le dzeɖoɖowo me, eye woagblɔ woƒe susuwo le mɔ si nu sẽ ŋutɔ kple ŋusẽtɔe nu. Esia ate ŋu ana ame bubuwo nase le wo ɖokui me be yewoŋe aɖaba ƒu yewo dzi eye womedea bubu yewo ŋu o.

Ame siwo ƒe atsyã nye adã ate ŋu ana ame bubuwo nawɔ nu si yewodi, gake zi geɖe la, wokpɔnɛ be ame bubuwo gbea yewo alo womelɔ̃a yewo o. Menye nenemae oBubudede ame ŋu le bubum.

Nukatae ame sia ame mewɔa nu abe ``(Assertive)'' ene o?

Nukatae ame aɖewo ƒoa nu ``Assertively'' gake bubuwo ya nyea passive alo aggressive ŋutɔ? Susu ɖeka si tae nye woƒe amenyenye . Susu bubue nye numame siwo míewɔna kple nuteƒekpɔkpɔ siwo su mía si. Ke hã, míesrɔ̃a alesi míanye ``Assertive'', ``Passive'', alo ``Aggressive'' to ŋkuléle ɖe alesi ame bubuwo – vevietɔ amesiwo nyi mí – wɔa nui me.

Nusiwo ate ŋu ana ame aɖe nawɔ nu le mɔ si mewɔa naneke o nu akpa dometɔ aɖewoe nye esi :

• Kakaɖedzimanɔamesi ɖe ame ɖokui ŋu alo asixɔxɔ si le ame ŋutɔ ƒe susuwo ŋu.
• Bubudede didi be yeadze ame bubuwo ŋu kple didi be ame bubuwo nalɔ̃ wò ŋu akpa.
• Dzitsitsi ɖe eŋu nenye be ame bubuwo alɔ̃ ɖe wò susuwo dzi loo alo woagbe wò.
• Ðeklemiɖeɖe ƒe seselelãme ŋutɔ, alo be woto gbegbe me va yi ne womebu ame ƒe susuwo ŋu o.
• Be woanye ``Assertive'' fia be mètu aɖaŋu siwo hiã ɖo o.

Esiawoe nye nusiwo ate ŋu ana ame aɖe nawɔ nu adãtɔe akpa :

• Kakaɖedzi si gbɔ eme .
• Ame ŋutɔ ƒe nuhiahiãwo gbɔ kpɔkpɔ kple ame ŋutɔ ƒe susu ɖeɖeko ŋu bubu fũ akpa.
• Esi nyemesrɔ̃ alesi míade bubu ame bubuwo ƒe nukpɔsusuwo alo woƒe nuhiahiãwo ŋu ahabu wo ŋu o ta.
• Womesrɔ̃ toɖoɖo ame bubuwo ahabia woƒe susuwo o.

Esiawoe nye nusiwo nana ame aɖe wɔa nu le mɔ nyuitɔ nu (`Assertive`) :

• Kakaɖedzi nyui na ame ɖokui .
• Esi ame xɔe se be yeƒe nukpɔsusuwo le vevie ta la, asixɔxɔ le ame ƒe seselelãmewo ŋu, eye gome le esi be wòagblɔ wo.
• Be woanɔ te ɖe nɔnɔme sesẽwo nu (si fia be woate ŋu akpɔ ɖeklemiɖeɖe, gbegbe, kple kpododonuwo gbɔ).
• Bubudede ame bubuwo ƒe didiwo kple nuhiahiãwo ŋu.
• Kpɔɖeŋu nyuiwo ƒe amesinɔnɔ na `(Assertiveness)`.
• Nyanya be woxɔ wò nukpɔsusuwo eye wokpɔ ŋudzedze ɖe wò nya siwo nègblɔna tẽe ŋu va yi.

Aleke míawɔ anye ``Assertive'' vie wu?

Be woagblɔe kple kakaɖedzi bia be woasrɔ̃ kadodomɔnu aɖewo eye nɔnɔme nyuitɔ nanɔ ame si. Wodzia ame aɖewo kple ŋutete be woagblɔ nya siwo me kɔ. Ame bubuwo hiã be woasrɔ̃ wo vie wu . Gake, amesiame ate ŋu atu esia ɖo.

Ale si nàwɔe nye esi:

Gbã la, bu kadodomɔnu etɔ̃ siawo dometɔ si (`(Assertive)`, `(Passive)`, alo `(Aggressive)`) si nènya nyuie wu ŋu kpɔ. Emegbe nàtso nya me nenye be ehiã be màkpe ŋu boo o, màgawɔ adã boo o, alo nànɔ nya hem sesĩe wu alesi nèle le dzɔdzɔme nu.

Be nàɖe nusiwo mewɔa naneke o dzi akpɔtɔ eye nàna ame ƒe nyagbɔgblɔ nadzi ɖe edzi la, wɔ nu siwo gbɔna:

• Kpɔ nyuie le nusi nèsusu, nusi nèsena le ɖokuiwò me, nusi dim nèle, nusi doa dzidzɔ na wò ŋu. Ele be nànya nu siawo hafi agblɔe na ame bubuwo.
• Ne ame aɖe bia wò be nukae nèdi la, de dzesii ne ègblɔ be, "Nyemenya o," "Nyemetsɔ ɖeke le eme o," alo "Ema menye kuxi o." Dzudzɔ nya ma gbɔgblɔ. Na wòazu numame na wò be nàgblɔ nya si nèdi, vevietɔ le nu suesuesuewo gome. Le kpɔɖeŋu me, ne ame aɖe bia be, "Èdi esi le amadede dzẽ me loo alo esi le dzo dama?" àte ŋu agblɔ be, "Etɔ dama la dze ŋunye – akpe na wò."
• Srɔ̃ nuwo biabia. Le kpɔɖeŋu me: "Meɖe kuku, ɖe mate ŋu akpɔ gavi?" "Mehiã nuŋlɔti - ɖe bubu le ame aɖe sia?" "Ðe mate ŋu akpɔ zikpui aɖea?" Esia atu aɖaŋu kple kakaɖedzi si hiã be nàbia nu veviwo ne ehiã la ɖo.
• Gblɔ wò susu na mí . Gblɔ na mí nenye be sinima aɖe si nèkpɔ la dze ŋuwò alo medzɔ dzi na wò o, kple nusitae.
• Te " Nye" nyagbɔgblɔwo abe "Medi..." "Madi be..." alo "Mese le ɖokuinye me..." zazã kpɔ.
• Di kpɔɖeŋu nyui aɖe si nye amesi ƒoa eɖokui ɖe nu me – si fia be mekpea ŋu akpa o, megawɔa adã akpa o. Kpɔe ɖa be àte ŋu asrɔ̃ ame ma ƒe nɔnɔme nyuitɔwo hã.
• Ðo ŋku edzi na ɖokuiwò be wò susuwo kple nukpɔsusuwo le vevie abe ame bubuwo tɔ ene. Esia nyanya akpe ɖe ŋuwò nàzu ``Assertive.`` Asertiveness dzea egɔme tso ememe nɔnɔme si dea asixɔxɔ ame bubuwo ŋu eye wòdea asixɔxɔ ɖokuiwò ŋu.

Be nàɖe Aggressiveness dzi akpɔtɔ eye nàdzi Assertiveness ɖe edzi la, wɔ nusiwo gbɔna:

• Na ame bubuwo naƒo nu gbã.
• Kpɔ nyuie le amewo ƒe nya me tom ne èle nu ƒom ŋu. Ne edzɔ alea la, lée eye nàgblɔ be, "Oo, taflatse - ègblɔe!" eye ame kemɛa nawu enu.
• Bia susu aɖe tso ame bubu gbɔ eye nàɖo to woƒe ŋuɖoɖo.
• Ne mielɔ̃ ɖe edzi o la, dze agbagba nàgblɔ wò susu evɔ màdo ame kemɛa ɖe anyi o. Le kpɔɖeŋu me, le esi teƒe be nàgblɔ be, "Bometsinyae nye ema" la, dze agbagba nàgblɔ be, "Nukpɔsusu ma medze ŋunye ŋutɔŋutɔ o." Alo le esi teƒe be nàgblɔ be, "Ame dziŋɔe wònye" la, dze agbagba nàgblɔ be, "Mesusu be metsɔ ɖeke le eme na ame bubuwo o."
• Di kpɔɖeŋu nyui aɖe si nye amesi ƒoa eɖokui ɖe nu me – si fia be mekpea ŋu akpa o, megawɔa adã akpa o. Kpɔe ɖa be àte ŋu asrɔ̃ ame ma ƒe nɔnɔme nyuitɔwo hã.

Ame siwo ƒoa wo ɖokui ɖe nya me le dzɔdzɔme nu ate ŋu atu woƒe ŋutetewo ɖo ɖe edzi:

• Be ``Assertive`` – si fia be, menye ŋukpe akpa o, menye amemabumabu akpa o – .Di kpɔɖeŋuɖola nyuiwo. Kpɔe ɖa be àte ŋu asrɔ̃ woƒe nɔnɔme nyuitɔwo hã. (Àkpɔe be esia nye aɖaŋuɖoɖo ma ke si míeɖona tsɔ kpena ɖe atsyã siwo kpea ŋu alo esiwo me wowɔa adã le ŋu. Esia le alea elabena míedzudzɔa nusɔsrɔ̃ gbeɖe o!)
• Bu ɣeyiɣi si me nègblɔa nya geɖe wu ŋu kpɔ . Amewo ƒe nuwɔna to vovo le nɔnɔme vovovowo me. Le ame geɖe gome la, ele bɔbɔe be woagblɔ nya le nɔnɔme aɖewo me (abe le xɔlɔ̃wo gbɔ ene), gake enye kuxi le bubuwo gome (abe le nufialawo alo ame yeyewo gome ene). Le nɔnɔme sesẽwo me la, dze agbagba nàbia ɖokuiwò be, "Nukae magblɔ nenye be mele xɔ̃nye veviwo gbɔ?"

Ne èƒo nu sesĩe la, efia be èxɔ ɖokuiwò dzi se. Nyateƒetoto tutuɖo nye afɔɖeɖe ɖeka si ana nàzu amesi nèdi be yeanye, wò ŋutɔ ɖokuiwò ƒe nɔnɔme nyuitɔ kekeake!

Nu vevitɔ kekeake si wòle be nàtsɔ ayi aƒemee (Take-Home Message) .

Enyo, eyata fifia susu nyui aɖe le asiwò le nusi ŋu míeƒo nu tsoe ŋu, ``(Assertiveness)''. Ðo ŋku edzi be esia menye nusi nàte ŋu atrɔ le zã ɖeka me o. Gake ne èsrɔ̃e la, àkpɔ vovototo aɖe godoo.

• Asixɔxɔ le wò seselelãmewo, nukpɔsusuwo, kple nuhiahiãwo ŋu ŋutɔ. Mègaɣla wo o.
• Mègawɔ nusi mewɔa naneke o, mègawɔ adã o. Míeƒo nu tso wo ame evea siaa ƒe ememe kple egodo ŋu.
• Nyateƒetoto fia be nàgblɔ wò susu anukwaretɔe, ade bubu ame bubuwo ŋu eye nàde bubu ɖokuiwò ŋu.
• Dze egɔme kple nu suesuesuewo. Te nya bɔbɔe aɖe gbɔgblɔ abe, "Amadede ma dzɔa dzi nam wu amadede sia."
• Se nya siwo ame bubuwo agblɔ la nyuie. Menye wò ŋutɔ wò nya gbɔgblɔ koe nye nyateƒetoto o.
• Ne èda vo alo ehiã be nàgblɔ be ao hã la, mègabu fɔ ɖokuiwò le eta o.

Dze agbagba nàtsɔ aɖaŋuɖoɖo sue siawo ade wò gbesiagbegbenɔnɔ me. Àkpɔ ale si miaƒe ƒomedodowo anyo ɖe edzii eye miase le mia ɖokui me be yewoanɔ bɔbɔe. Èɖu dzi!

Kadodo, Susu ƒe Lãmesẽ , Nyateƒetoto, Kakaɖedzi Ðokui, Amewo Dome Kadodo, Seselelãme Dzikpɔkpɔ , Lãmesẽ Agbenɔnɔ