Words cannot describe the joy you feel when a new guest arrives in your and your husband's life, can they? Along with that joy, there are also many small responsibilities that come with it. Among them, choosing a name for the baby is a topic that many parents find a little stressful and sometimes causes small arguments. Grandparents say one name, friends say another name, you have another in mind... In the end, you can't decide what to choose. So today, let's talk about choosing a name for this baby.
A name is not just a word!
We often think of a name as a beautiful word for a little baby. But think about it this way. The name you choose will be with your child forever. When that child goes to school, plays with friends, starts a job, has a family of his own... this name will be his identity in all these places.
According to Laura Wattenberg, who wrote a book about baby names, the best advice is, "Think about the name you're giving yourself." If you were starting your life today, would you want this name to represent you? If the answer is "yes," you're on the right track. If the answer is "no," it's time to think about the name again.
Simply put, imagine your child as an adult with the name you chose, not as your cute baby .
Don't chase the latest trend.
Sometimes we see very strange and unique names. Especially in foreign countries, the children of actors and actresses have names like Apple and Blue Ivy. Now there is a trend in our country to find such unique names. Many people try to find a name that everyone likes, but no one else uses.
But a name that is popular one year may be outdated the next. These are some of the name trends that are popular these days.
| Trend Type | Examples |
|---|---|
| Names of cities | Austin, Brooklyn (although in Sri Lanka they don't use names like Kandy and Dambulla yet, it's a similar concept) |
| Applying surnames to first names | Parker, Coleman (in our country, surnames like Perera and Silva are rarely used for names) |
| Reusing old, traditional names | Pearl, Ruby (in Sri Lanka, names like pearl and ruby) |
| Names related to nature | River, Skye (like river, sky) |
In addition to this, it is very popular in our country to name a child after a family member, relative, or someone we respect. All of this shows how much the society around us influences us when choosing a name.
The best ideas come when you least expect them.
Sometimes, no matter how many books and websites you read, you can't find a name that suits your taste. But the best idea can come from an unexpected place and time.
- A name that comes from family history: Melanie and Brian were looking for a name for their son. One day, when they went to Brian's parents' house, Brian's father mentioned the name "Preston" while talking about his grandfather. At that moment, the two looked at each other and smiled. They had found the name they were looking for. In our country, it is very common to give a name that comes from a grandfather, grandmother, or lineage .
- A name that both parents love: Some parents combine the letters of their two names to create a beautiful name. It's very creative, and every time you hear that name, you're reminded of the love between the two.
- A name that comes from a special memory: A mother named Joan named her son "Benny" because it was the name of her favorite restaurant she went to when she was pregnant. "I always ate there when I was a kid, and now it's my son's favorite place too," she says.
Regret over a name - 'Baby Name Remorse'
In some families, choosing a name can be a source of great debate. The wife doesn't like the husband's name, and the husband doesn't like the wife's name. This is very common. Because behind choosing a name, many things are deeply connected, such as our feelings, our family background, race, and religion.
When a mother named Maria told her husband that she wanted to name him "Stella," he didn't like it at all. He said, "When my daughter does something naughty, I feel like Marlon Brando in 'A Streetcar Named Desire.'" In the end, they both came up with a list of names they both agreed on and chose the two best ones. The most important thing is to choose a name that respects both of their feelings and makes them both happy.
Sometimes, after parents have spent a lot of time choosing a name, they feel like the name doesn't suit the baby when the baby is born. This is called Baby Name Remorse .
A mother named Kelsey named her daughter "Presley," but from the moment she was born, she felt that the name didn't suit her. Later, they gave her a new name, "Summer," and legally changed it.
"It may be a good idea to change the name when the child is young, before they get used to the name, if both parents agree. But if the child is a little older and there is no agreement between the two, it is better to get used to the existing name. Often, as the child grows older, the name becomes a part of them," experts say.
Still can't figure it out? Here are some more tips
If you're still stuck on choosing a name, these tips will help you.
- Talk to a few trusted people: Tell a few friends you trust and have a good sense of humor about the two or three names you and your husband have in mind. Get their opinions. If your family and friends don't like the name you've chosen, it could be a warning sign .
- Spell it with ease: Some parents try to make a common name special by spelling it differently. For example, the name "Mihiri" is spelled differently, like "Mihiry". Remember, we spend most of our lives reading names, not spelling them. When the spelling is odd, the child will have to spell and explain their name at school or at work. This can be a hassle for them.
- Talk to your doctor: If you are having difficulty resolving the stress of choosing a name or the conflicts between the two of you, you can talk to your family doctor about it and get help, such as seeking psychological counseling.
Take-Home Message
- When choosing a name for your baby, think not only about when he was a child, but also about how that name will affect him as an adult.
- Don't just follow the latest trend. Sometimes a simple, traditional name can become more valuable over time.
- This is a decision between you and your partner. Talk it out and choose a name that you're both happy with.
- Sometimes the best name can come to you unexpectedly when you're having trouble thinking of it. So don't put too much pressure on yourself.
- Keep the spelling of the name simple. It will be a great convenience for the child in the future.
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