Ina ngana koe ki te whakatū i tō waka, ka tū te tangata i tō taha nā te mea kāore i te nui te wāhi. Ko taua kare ā-roto e puta ake ana ki tō hinengaro i taua wā tonu, te kare ā-roto e pā ana tō uma, te wiri o ō ringaringa... Koinei te riri. I ētahi wā ka titiro koe ki te whakaata ki tētahi e tūtaki ana koe i mua i te waka, ka riri i a rātou i roto i tō hinengaro, ka hamama koe ina hinga koe i tētahi kēmu kirikiti, ka ngau tetahi tamaiti nohinohi i tētahi atu tangata ina kore e whiwhi i tā rātou e hiahia ana, ka kati tetahi tamaiti nohinohi i te tatau ka haere ki tōna rūma... Ko ēnei katoa te pūtake o tēnei kare ā-roto o te riri.
He aha te tikanga o te whakahaere riri?
Ko te whakahaere riri te huarahi e whakatau ai tātou i te riri ina pā mai. He momo rongoā kōrero anō hoki (e mōhiotia ana ko te 'Whakaora Whanoke Hinengaro') e mahia ana me te kaitohutohu hauora hinengaro , takitahi, rōpū rānei. Tērā pea ka taea e koe te haere ki tētahi akomanga mō tēnei kaupapa.
I roto i tēnei whakaora hinengaro, ka āwhinahia koe ki te tautuhi i te wā e riri ana koe, me te whakawhanake i ngā tikanga me ngā rautaki e hiahiatia ana e koe hei whakatau i aua kare ā-roto i roto i te huarahi hauora . Ka ako koe mō:
- He aha te mea e riri ai koe, ā, me pēhea te whakaatu a te tangata i taua riri?
- Mō te whakaoti rapanga me te whakawhitiwhiti kōrero.
- Mō ngā tikanga whakangā.
I ētahi wā, ka tūtohu pea tō kaitohutohu kia kite koe i tētahi tākuta. Nā te mea ko te riri tonu ka puta mai i tētahi atu raruraru hauora hinengaro, pērā i te pouri , te manukanuka rānei. I ēnei wā, ka tohua pea e te tākuta he rongoā hei āwhina.
He aha rawa tēnei riri?
He kare ā-roto kaha te riri e puta ake ana i roto i ō tātou hinengaro hei whakautu ki tētahi āhuatanga, hei akiaki i a tātou ki te hanga i tētahi huringa. Ina puta mai tēnei kare ā-roto, ka whakahohehia tētahi wāhanga o tō tātou pūnaha io, te "Pūnaha Io Aroha", ā, ka whakarite i te tinana mō te "tauhohe whawhai, rere rānei" .
I tēnei wā, he maha ngā panonitanga ka puta i roto i ō tātou tinana. Ka piki ake te tere o te manawa me te manawa. Ka tukuna ngā homoni ahotea, ā, ka nui ake te rere o te toto ki ō tātou uaua. Ka aro nui ake tō aro. Mā ēnei katoa ka hoatu te kaha e hiahiatia ana e koe hei ora i tētahi tūponotanga.
Heoi, kāore te riri e puta mai i te riri tinana i ngā wā katoa. Ka taea hoki e tātou te riri i roto i ngā huihuinga pāpori. Hei tauira:
- Ina he taupatupatu whakaaro ki tētahi hoa, ki tētahi mema rānei o te whānau.
- Ina kite koe i te hē.
- Ina kore e tutuki ō hiahia.
- Ina tawai tetahi ki a koe.
Kāore e rite te ahua o te riri mō te katoa. He rerekē i runga i ō wheako o mua, i tō hauora, i tō āhuatanga o nāianei. Ka tere te riri o ētahi tāngata, ā, ka tino kaha te riri o ētahi. Ka rerekē mai i te riri ngawari ki te riri nui.
Ka aha mēnā kāore te riri e whakapuakina tika?
Ki te pehi koe i tō riri, ka pā ki tō whakaaro me tō whanonga. Ka taea hoki e ia te whakararu, te whakararu rānei i ētahi mate tinana. Ki te riri tonu koe, ka kiia tēnei āhuatanga e ngā tākuta he "riri mau tonu" . Anei ētahi o ngā raruraru hauora ka puta mai i tēnei āhuatanga.
| raruraru hauora | Whakaahuatanga |
|---|---|
| toto toto tiketike | Ka taea e te riri pinepine te whakaputa i te toto toto tiketike. |
| Mate ngakau | Ka whakanui ake te riri mau tonu i te mōrearea o te mate ngakau me ētahi atu mate pūnaha toto. |
| Ngā mamae o te upoko | Ka puta pinepine pea ngā mamae upoko me ngā migraines i puta mai i te ahotea. |
| Ngā mate kiri | Tērā pea ka kino haere ngā mate kiri pērā i te ekisema me te psoriasis. |
| Ngā raruraru nakunaku | Tērā pea ka puta ngā raruraru pēnei i te mamae o te puku, te mate pāwera, me te korere. |
Nō reira, he mea kino te riri?
Kāore. Ko te ririHe kare ā-roto noa, ā-taiao hoki. He pai, he kino rānei. Kei te āhua o tō urupare ki taua kare ā-roto.
Whakaarohia te aituā mō te pāka waka i kōrerotia i mua ake nei. Ka taea e koe te tatari mō tētahi meneti, te tuku i tō riri kia iti, kātahi ka haere ki tētahi atu wāhi. Ka taea rānei e koe te puta atu i te motuka ka tuhi i tētahi reta ki te matapihi o te motuka kē, ka haere atu.
I ngā āhuatanga e rua, i riri koe. Engari i te āhuatanga tuatahi, i kite koe i te riri, ā, i tukua atu. I te āhuatanga tuarua, i tukuna atu e koe taua riri ki tētahi atu, ā, tērā pea i mau tonu i roto i tō hinengaro i te rā roa.
He kare ā-roto whai hua te riri, engari ki te mea he maha ngā wā ka riri koe, ā, kei te pā ki tō mahi, ki ō whanaungatanga rānei, kua tae ki te wā ki te rapu āwhina hei whakahaere i tō riri.
Ko wai e hiahia ana ki tēnei maimoatanga whakahaere riri?
Ina hoki, he pai te ako i ngā tikanga whakahaere riri mō te katoa. Ina koa mēnā he mate hinengaro tōu, ka taea e tēnei momo rongoā te hanga i tētahi rerekētanga nui ki tō kounga o te oranga me ngā whanaungatanga. He mea nui rawa atu tēnei mō te hunga whai mate e whai ake nei:
| Tūnga hauora hinengaro |
|---|
| Mate kore aro/mate kore mahi nui (ADHD) |
| Mate pūrua |
| Mate tuakiri rohe |
| Te pouri |
| Te mate whakararuraru i te whanonga |
| Mate manukanuka whānui |
| Te mate pahū ā-wā |
| Mate whakakeke ātete |
He aha ngā mea ka tupu i te rongoā?
I roto i tēnei whakaora hinengaro, ka ako koe i ngā tikanga hei āwhina i a koe ki te mārama ki ngā mea e riri ai koe, me te āhua o ō kare ā-roto e pā ana ki taua riri. Tērā pea ka pātai mai tō kaiārahi i ngā pātai pēnei:
- He aha ngā mea e riri ai koe?
- He aha te mea e tino riri ana koe? He tika te nui o tō riri mō te kaupapa?
- He kare ā-roto anō kei muri i tō riri? (hei tauira, te wehi, te manukanuka, te mamae, te whakama)
- He urupare tēnei i akohia e koe mai i tō tamarikitanga?
- He aha te āhua o tō tinana ina riri koe?
Kātahi ka whakawhanakehia e kōrua ko tō kaiārahi ngā pūkenga me ngā rautaki hei whakatau i ēnei āhuatanga. He mea whai hua ēnei hei whakamahi māu ina riri koe.
- Te Huri i tō Whakaaro (Hangā Anō Hinengaro): Engari ko te noho tonu ki ngā whakaaro kino, ka ako koe ki te titiro ki ngā kaupapa i tētahi huarahi rerekē. Engari ko te whakaaro ki ngā mea pēnei i te, "Koinei te mea kino rawa atu kua pa ki ahau," ka ako koe ki te whakaaro pono ake, pēnei i te, "He kino tēnei, ā, he tika te pouri mōna, engari ehara i te mutunga o te ao."
- Ngā pūkenga whakawhitiwhiti kōrero pai: Ka ako koe ki te whakapuaki i tō riri i roto i te huarahi hauora. Ka ako koe i ngā huarahi rerekē ki te kōrero mō ō kare ā-roto, me te whakaaro i mua i te tauhohe.
- Ngā tikanga whakangā: Ka taea e ēnei tikanga te āwhina i a koe ki te whakaroa i mua i te tauhohe ina riri koe. Ka taea hoki e rātou te āwhina i a koe ki te mutu te whakaaro mō tētahi raruraru, kaua hoki e noho roa ki taua raruraru (te whakaaroaro). Kei roto i ēnei ko ngā mea pēnei i te whakaaroaro, ngā mahi manawa hōhonu, te yoga rānei .
Ka whakaharatau koe i ēnei tikanga hou me tō kaiārahi i ngā wā whakaora. Ka akiakihia hoki koe kia whakaharatau i te kāinga. He mea nui kia whakaharatau kia tae rā anō ki te maha o ngā wā ka riri koe, kia heke rānei te kaha o tō riri, ā, kia noho noa ēnei tikanga ki a koe.
He aha ngā painga o ēnei maimoatanga?
Mā te whakaora i te riri, ka kite koe ka pai ake ō whanaungatanga i te kāinga me te mahi. Ka nui ake tō mana whakahaere i ō kare ā-roto. Tērā pea ka āwhina i a koe kia pai ake te moe, kia tiakina hoki koe i ētahi mate.
He tūponotanga kei reira?
Tērā pea ka kore koe e pai ki te kōrero mō ō kare ā-roto i roto i te wānanga tohutohu. Kia pai ai te whanaungatanga o kōrua ko te kaitohutohu, ka taea e kōrua te pātai mō ngā mamae o mua. Heoi anō, he mea nui te aro atu ki ēnei whakaaro me ngā maharatanga uaua hei whakapai ake i tō oranga o ia rā.
Āhea koe me toro atu ki te tākuta?
Ki te kino haere ō tohu, ki te whakaaro rānei koe kei whara koe i a koe anō, i ētahi atu rānei, me toro atu ki te tākuta tonu .
Mēnā he āhuatanga ohorere pēnei, ka taea e koe te haere ki te Wāhanga Maimoatanga Mate Urutā (ETU) o te hōhipera tata rawa atu, ka taea rānei te waea atu ki te National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) o Sri Lanka i te tau 1926 mō te āwhina tonu.
He wāhanga noa te riri o te tangata. Engari i ētahi wā ka kore e taea te whakahaere. Ki te kitea koe e riri tonu ana, ki te whara rānei koe i tētahi e arohaina ana e koe ki āu kupu kino, ki āu mahi kino rānei, he tino āwhina te ako i ngā huarahi hei whakahaere i tō riri.
Karere Tangohia ki te Kāinga
- He kare ā-roto noa te riri. Ehara i te mea kino. Ko te mea nui ko te āhua o tāu urupare ki taua kare ā-roto.
- Mā te pupuri i te riri ka ara ake ngā raruraru hauora maha, pērā i te toto toto tiketike, te mate ngakau, me ngā raruraru hauora hinengaro.
- Ko te whakahaere riri ko te ako ki te whakahaere i tō riri mā te tuku tohutohu me ngā tikanga mahi.
- Ki te mea kei te kaha haere tō riri, kei te pāngia rānei ō whanaungatanga, kaua e wehi ki te rapu tohutohu i tētahi tākuta, i tētahi tohunga hauora hinengaro rānei.
- Mēnā he āhuatanga ohorere, arā, ki te whakaaro koe kei roto koe, kei roto rānei i te mōrearea o te whara, haere tonu ki te Wāhanga Maimoatanga Ohotata (ETU) o te hōhipera, waea atu rānei ki te nama āwhina hauora hinengaro 1926.
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