Kuqhelekile ukuba abazali abatsha bazive bexinezelekile okanye bexhalabile ngokufika komntwana omtsha. Ezi mvakalelo zihlala ziphela njengoko beqala ukwazi umntwana wabo kwaye beqhelana nesiqhelo sabo. Kodwa kwabanye, olu xhala luyaqhubeka nokukhula, lunganciphi. Lunokuba nzima kangangokuba lwenze kube nzima ukunyamekela umntwana wabo. Yiloo nto sithetha ngayo namhlanje.
Yintoni ixhala emva kokubeleka?
Ngamafutshane, ingahlulwahlulwa ibe ziintlobo ezimbini. Sibiza ixhala elivela nangaliphi na ixesha ukususela ekukhulelweni ukuya kunyaka emva kokuba umntwana ezelwe ngokuthi "ixhala elivela emva kokuzalwa". Ukuba lenzeka ngexesha lokukhulelwa, libizwa ngokuba yi "ixhala elivela ngaphambi kokuzalwa", kwaye ukuba lenzeka emva kokuba umntwana ezelwe, libizwa ngokuba yi "ixhala elivela emva kokuzalwa".
Olu xhala alubangelwa yinto enye. Uxinzelelo kunye noloyiko oluhamba nalo kunzima ukululawula. Ngamanye amaxesha ezi mvakalelo zinokuvela ngaphandle kwesizathu konke konke. Kwakhona, azibi ngcono ngokwazo. Ngokwezifundo, umama omnye kwabasixhenxe abatsha kunye notata omnye kwabalishumi bafumana le meko "yokuxhalaba emva kokubeletha". Oku kuthetha ukuba ixhaphake kakhulu kunokuba sicinga.
Abantu abaninzi baye beva nge-'(Postpartum Depression)' okanye ukudakumba okwenzeka emva kokubeleka. Enyanisweni, ezinye zeempawu ze-'(Postpartum Anxiety)' zifana neempawu zokudakumba. Ngokuhamba kwexesha, olu tshintsho lwengqondo lunokuba nzima ngakumbi. Abazali abaninzi abatsha bayoyika okanye baneentloni zokuxelela nabani na ukuba baziva ngolu hlobo. Kuba wonke umntu ucinga ukuba ukuba nomntwana yinto ekufuneka bonwabe ngayo. Abantu abaninzi bayathandabuza ukutsho ukuba baziva bexhalabile okanye besoyika kakhulu ngelo xesha.
Kodwa khumbula, oku akulona ityala lakho. Le yimeko yezonyango enokunyangeka ngokupheleleyo ngonyango. Ngoko ke ungoyiki ukuthetha ngayo.
Abanye abantu banokuba nexhala emva kokubeletha kunye noxinzelelo emva kokubeletha. Basenokubonakalisa iindlela zokuziphatha ezifana nezo ze-Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). Kusaphandwa ukuba ezi meko zinxulumene njani.
Zithini iimpawu zoxinzelelo emva kokubeleka?
Olu xinzelelo lunokubangela ukuba ube neempawu zomzimba nezengqondo. Cinga ngezinto ezinje, 'Ngaba kukho into enokwenzeka kumntwana wam?', 'Ngaba ndiza kumnyamekela kakuhle umntwana wam?' Umzimba wakho usabela ngolu hlobo kuba woyika ukhuseleko lomntwana wakho. Oomama abaninzi abatsha bachaza oku njengomvakalelo "wokuphambana", umvakalelo wokungakwazi ukulawula iingcinga ezibaleka engqondweni yakho.
| Iimpawu eziqhelekileyo | |
|---|---|
| Iimpawu Zomzimba | |
| Iingxaki zokungalali okanye zokulala | Ukungakwazi ukulala kakuhle. |
| Umnqweno wokutya | Ukulahlekelwa ngokupheleleyo kukutya. |
| Ukungakwazi ukuhlala kwindawo enye | Ndihlala ndingaphumli, ndihambahamba. |
| Isicaphucaphu kunye nentlungu yesisu | Ukuphazamiseka kwesisu kunye nokucaphuka. |
| Ukunyuka kwesantya sentliziyo | Ukuziva ngathi intliziyo yakho iyabetha ngamandla. |
| Ubunzima bokuphefumla | Ukuziva ufuthanisekile, kunzima ukuphefumla. |
| Ukuqina kwemisipha | Izihlunu emzimbeni ziqinile kwaye zivakala zibuhlungu. |
| Iimpawu Zeemvakalelo | |
| Ndiziva ndingakhululekanga | Ndisoloko ndinomsindo kwaye ndingaphumli. |
| Ukungakwazi ukuzola | Ukungakwazi ukuphumla. |
| Uloyiko lokuba kuza kwenzeka into embi. | Ukuziva uloyiko ngaphandle kwesizathu, ukuziva uloyiko oluzayo. |
| Ukulibala kunye nokungakwazi ukugxila | Ukungakwazi ukugxila kwinto enye. |
| Ukucinga ngezinto ezingenakwenzeka | Ukuhlala ucinga kwaye usoyika izinto ezingenakwenzeka. |
Kutheni le meko isenzeka? Zithini izizathu?
Akukho sizathu sinye sale nto, kodwa zininzi. Ngokutsho koogqirha, esona sizathu siphambili kukutshintsha kweehomoni okwenzeka emzimbeni wakho emva kokubeleka. Emva kokuba nomntwana, amanqanaba eehomoni emzimbeni wakho ehla ngequbuliso ngokukhawuleza. Oku kunokuchaphazela ngqo imeko yakho yengqondo, oko kukuthi, isimo sakho sengqondo. Kwaye olu tshintsho lweehomoni lunokubangela ukuba usabele ngokugqithisileyo nangona uziva uxinezelekile kancinci.
Enye into ebalulekileyo kukulala. Kunokuba nzima ukulala ngokwaneleyo xa unyamekela usana olusandul’ ukuzalwa. Ukungalali kakuhle kukwenza ube sesichengeni sokufumana uxinzelelo. Ezi zinto zibangela uxinzelelo zinokuba zizinto eziqhelekileyo ojongana nazo njengomzali omtsha. Umzekelo, izinto ezifana nokuncancisa, ukukhulelwa okanye ukuzala, okanye amanqanaba athile okukhula komntwana wakho.
Izinto ezinobungozi
Abanye abantu basengozini enkulu yokuba nale meko. Ukuba ezi zinto ziyasebenza kuwe, usengozini enkulu:
- Ukuba kukho umntu kusapho lwakho okhe waba neemeko ezinxulumene nokuxhalaba ngaphambili.
- Ukuba wena ngokwakho ukhe waba nexhala okanye uxinezeleko ngaphambili.
- Ukuba ukhulelwe okanye ube nobunzima ekuzaleni.
- Ukuba ukhe walahlekelwa ngumntwana ngaphambili okanye waphunyelwa sisisu.
- Ukuba kuye kwafuneka unakekele abantwana abaninzi ngaxeshanye.
- Ukuba ukhe wachaphazeleka yimeko yokuxhatshazwa okanye ukuxhatshazwa engqondweni ngexesha lobuntwana bakho okanye kamva ebomini bakho.
- Ukuba ngumfazi kukwangumngcipheko.
Ugqirha uyixilonga njani le nto?
Ukuba ufumana iimpawu esizikhankanyileyo apha ngasentla,Kubalulekile ukuthetha nogqirha wakho ngale nto ngoko nangoko. Ugqirha wakho uza kukubuza ngeempawu zakho aze akucele ukuba ugcwalise iphepha lemibuzo malunga neempawu zakho.
Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukunyaniseka kangangoko xa uthetha nogqirha wakho. Usenokuziva uneentloni okanye uloyiko, kodwa ungaziva ngaloo ndlela.
Ekubeni kungekho vavanyo lwegazi luthile oluza kuchongwa ukuze kufunyaniswe esi sifo, oko ukuthethayo kuya kunceda ugqirha wakho akuqonde ngcono aze amisele unyango olufanelekileyo. Khumbula, oku kuqheleke kakhulu kunokuba ucinga.
Zithini iindlela zonyango zoku?
Zombini 'ixhala emva kokubeletha' kunye 'noxinzelelo emva kokubeletha ' zinokunyangwa ngokupheleleyo ngonyango. Kukho iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokwenza oku. Ungathetha nogqirha wakho uze ukhethe eyona ndlela ifanelekileyo yonyango.
- Kwiimeko ezingenzima kangako: Ukuba imeko ayinzima kakhulu, ugqirha ucebisa ezinye iindlela onokuziphumza ngazo ekhaya. Enye kukufumana ixesha elaneleyo lokulala nokufumana inkxaso . Ukuba unokunika umntwana umyeni wakho okanye usapho lwakho okwethutyana ukuze uphumle, oko kuya kuba luncedo kakhulu. Kwakhona, ukujoyina amaqela enkxaso kubazali abatsha kunokuba luncedo olukhulu ekuphepheni isizungu.
- Kwiimeko ezinzima ngakumbi: Ukuba imeko inzima ngakumbi, ugqirha wakho unokucebisa unyango lokuthetha, ngakumbi unyango lokuziphatha kwengqondo (i-CBT) . I-CBT lunyango olusebenzayo kakhulu kwiimeko ezifana nexhala kunye ne-OCD.
- Amayeza: Abanye abantu banokufuna amayeza okunceda ukulawula ixhala labo. Ii-Selective Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitors (SSRIs) zezona zisetyenziswa kakhulu. Abantu abaninzi bafumanisa ukuba la mayeza asebenza kakuhle xa edityaniswe nonyango olufana ne-CBT.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Ukuxhalaba emva kokubeleka yinto eqhelekileyo. Asikuko ukuba unengxaki okanye ubuthathaka.
- Ukuba awukwazi ukulawula uloyiko lwakho, ixhala, okanye uvalo, musa ukuba neentloni okanye ukoyika ukuthetha nogqirha wakho ngaloo nto.
- Ukuphumla ngokwaneleyo, ingakumbi ukulala, kubalulekile. Fumana inkxaso kusapho lwakho ngale nto.
- Le meko inokunyangeka ngokupheleleyo ngonyango. Ngoko ke musa ukubandezeleka wedwa kwaye funa ingcebiso kagqirha. Awuwedwa.
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