Imibono eyiphutha engu-7 ongase ube nayo mayelana nokwelashwa ngenkulumo!

Ucabangani uma uzwa igama elithi 'ukwelashwa'? Ingabe limayelana nokuhlala kusofa, ukubamba ibhokisi lezicubu, nokukhokha imali eningi kumuntu ongakuqondi nhlobo? Noma ingabe kuyinto esebenza kuphela kubantu abaphazamiseke kakhulu engqondweni noma "abagula ngengqondo"? Uma kunjalo, thatha isikhashana ufunde lokhu. Iqiniso lihlukile kakhulu.

Eqinisweni, sonke singazuza kulolu hlobo lokwelashwa ngenkulumo ngesikhathi esithile empilweni yethu. Kodwa kudinga umzamo kuwe, uchwepheshe wezokwelapha ohambisana nezidingo zakho futhi okuqonda ngempela, kanye nesikhathi esithathayo ukubona imiphumela. Ngakho ake sibheke imibono eyi-7 emikhulu abantu abaningi abanayo ngokwelashwa nokuthi banjani ngempela.

1. "Ubuntwana bami abusenamsebenzi manje..."

Abantu abaningi beza ekwelashweni ukuze baxoxe ngenkinga empilweni yabo yamanje. Kungaba inkinga emsebenzini, inkinga ebudlelwaneni, noma inkinga nezingane zabo. Kodwa ngokuvamile okudingeka sisebenzele kukho akuyona inkinga yanamuhla, kodwa indlela esizihlanganisa ngayo nesikhathi sethu esidlule.

Cabanga nje, uma abazali bakho babengakuqondi kahle ngesikhathi usengumntwana, noma bengayazisi imizwa yakho, ngisho nalezo zinto ezincane zingaba nomthelela omkhulu ekuzethembeni kwakho kanye nobudlelwano obakhayo nabanye lapho ukhula. Njengabo bonke abantu abafika ekwelashweni, izinkinga zabo zamanje zihlobene ngandlela thile nokuhlangenwe nakho kwabo kwasebuntwaneni.

2. "Odokotela bezokwelapha bonke bayafana..."

Lutho neze. Njengoba nje kunezinhlobo ezahlukene zochwepheshe phakathi kodokotela, kunezinhlobo ezahlukene zabelaphi. Futhi izindlela zokwelapha nazo zihlukile komunye nomunye.

• Ukwelashwa Kokuziphatha Kokuqonda: Lokhu kuhilela ukuhlonza, ukuphonsela inselelo, nokushintsha ukuziphatha okubi kanye nezindlela zokucabanga ezibangela izinkinga empilweni yakho.
• Ukwelashwa Kwengqondo: Lokhu kugxila endleleni ingqondo yakho engaphansi kokuqonda ethonya ngayo ukuziphatha kwakho.

Ngakho-ke, ungacabangi ukuthi umuntu wokuqala ohlangana naye uzoba ofanele wena. Njengokuya ezitolo eziningana uyothenga ingubo enhle, kuwumqondo omuhle ukukhuluma nabelaphi abaningana ukuze uthole ofanele wena. Izinto eziyinhloko okufanele uzibheke yilezi:

• Ingabe lowo muntu ungumeluleki onelayisensi ?
• Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kukhona yini ulwazi endaweni ofuna usizo kuyo (isib., ukwelulekwa ngomshado, ukuhlukumezeka, izinkinga zokudla).
• Futhi, ukuthi uzizwa ufanelekile yini futhi ukhululekile yini ukukhuluma nalowo muntu.

3. "Ngifuna umuthi nje, akunasizathu sokukhuluma..."

Lokhu futhi kuyinto abantu abaningi abayicabangayo. "Uma udinga imithi yenkinga yempilo yengqondo, udinga ukwelashwa nakanjani," kusho odokotela bezifo zengqondo.

Cabanga ngakho, umuthi ufana neplasta oyifaka esilondeni. Ucindezela izimpawu kuphela. Kodwa ukwelashwa kumayelana nokuthola imbangela yalelo nxeba nokuliphulukisa ngaphakathi . Ukuthatha umuthi wedwa ngaphandle kokwelashwa kuwukucindezela izimpawu ngaphandle kokufinyelela emsukeni wenkinga yakho.

Ukwelapha kuyindlela kuphela yokufinyelela emnyombweni wenkinga. Ukwelapha ngokukhuluma kukusiza ukuthi uqonde ukuthi izinkinga zakho zivelaphi, ukuthi zibangelwa yini, futhi uzelapha. Ikhambi langempela ukumba izinkinga zakho, uziqonde ngokujulile, bese uthola indlela engcono yokuqhubekela phambili. Kungcono ukukhuluma nodokotela wakho bese unquma ukuthi udinga imithi noma ukwelashwa.

4. "Akulungile lokho..."

Abantu abaningi bayangabaza ngale ndlela yokwelapha ngoba banolwazi olungalungile ngayo.

Ngezinye izikhathi esinye isizathu salokhu kungabaza ukwesaba . "Izikhathi eziningi, ukwesaba ukuthi 'ngeke kusebenze' kungenxa yokwesaba. Bayazi ukuthi banezinkinga okudingeka bazixazulule, kodwa bayesaba ukubhekana nazo. Lokho kwesaba kuvela njengesithiyo sokuthi 'ngeke kusebenze.'" Kodwa uma ubeka lokho kwesaba eceleni bese ungena enkambisweni, leso yisinyathelo sokuqala osithathayo endleleni efanele.

5. "Angikwazi ukukhokhela izindleko..."

Lokhu kuyinkinga enkulu kubantu abaningi, kodwa akudingeki ukhokhe imali eningi njalo.

Kunemitholampilo yezempilo yengqondo yamahhala ezibhedlela zikahulumeni eSri Lanka. Ungathola okwengeziwe ngayo esibhedlela esiseduze nawe. Futhi, eminye iminyango yezengqondo yaseyunivesithi inikeza izinsizakalo ezishibhile ngaphansi kokuqondisa ngabaqeqeshwayo.

Ngisho nasemkhakheni ozimele, abanye abelaphi bayayamukela imishwalense. Labo abangayenzi, kulabo abadinga usizo kodwa abangakwazi ukuyikhokhela, banikeza isikali semali esishintshashintshayo esihlukahluka kuye ngeholo labo . Abelaphi abaningi benza lokhu njengesevisi, ngenxa yesifiso sokusiza abantu. Ngakho-ke uma unenkinga, ungaxoxa ngakho kaningi futhi nivumelane ngemali efanelekile.

6. "Angazi ukuthi ukwelashwa kuzongenza ngidideke kakhulu..."

Abanye abantu besaba ukuthi ukukhuluma ngesikhathi sabo esidlule nezinto ezibuhlungu kuzobenza bangakwazi ukubekezelela futhi kuzobenza bacindezeleke nakakhulu. Kodwa akunjalo.

Umeluleki omuhle uyazi ukuthi kungakanani ongakusingatha ngesikhathi esithile, nokuthi kufanele uhlehle nini kancane. Abalokothi bakucindezele ngaphezu kwemingcele yakho. Ukwelapha akukhona ukulungisa konke ngesikhathi esisodwa. Kumayelana nokwenza kancane kancane , okungukuthi, kuphela ngangokunokwenzeka ngaleso sikhathi.

Into ebalulekile ukuthi unqume ukuthi uya kude kangakanani nokuthi ukhuluma nini ngakho. Ulawula konke. Uma usebenza nodokotela wezokwelapha okulungele, ungahamba ngejubane lakho, ngendlela ezwakala iphephile kuwe.

7. "Anginaso isikhathi salokho..."

Nakuba lokhu kungase kubonakale kuyisizathu esizwakalayo ngezimpilo zanamuhla ezimatasa, manje sekukhona nezixazululo zalokho.

"Odokotela bezokwelapha manje basebenza ngezimpelasonto nakusihlwa ," kusho ochwepheshe. Bayaqonda ukuthi iziguli zimatasa kangakanani. Akukhona lokho kuphela, kodwa nobuchwepheshe buye babasiza.

Ngemva kokuhlangana nodokotela wezokwelapha ubuso nobuso futhi nixoxe ngezidingo zakho, abanye abelaphi bazimisele ukwenza izingxoxo ngocingo noma ngisho nangezingcingo zevidiyo . Izingxoxo zomuntu mathupha ngokuvamile ziyindlela engcono kakhulu, kodwa uma isikhathi siyinkinga, kunezinketho ezinjengalezi.