Momma yɛnka assertiveness ho asɛm, sɛnea wobɛka nea ɛwɔ w’adwene mu a worempira obiara!

Yɛn nyinaa wɔ mmerɛ wɔ yɛn abrabɔ mu a ɛhia sɛ yɛka deɛ yɛdwene ne deɛ yɛpɛ kyerɛ afoforɔ, pefee. Nanso ɛtɔ da bi a, ɛte sɛ nea ɛyɛ den kakra sɛ yɛbɛyɛ saa, na yɛte ehu ne ehu nka kakra wɔ yɛn mu. Wɔ mmere a ɛtete saa mu no, eyi yɛ ade a ɛho hia paa a ɛboa yɛn. Sɛ yɛbɛka no tiawa a, ɛyɛ yɛn adwene a yɛde ahotoso bɛda yɛn ho adi, nanso yɛde obu ma afoforo nso.

Dɛn ankasa ne Assertiveness?

Susuw ho saa kwan yi so: Ka a wɔka no denneennen yɛ ɔkwan a ɛfata a wɔfa so di nkitaho. Ɛkyerɛ sɛ wubetumi ada wo nsusuwii, wo nkate, w’ahiade , ne w’adwenkyerɛ adi wɔ nokwaredi ne obu mu . Yehyia tebea horow pii da biara da, na saa ka a yɛka no denneennen yi betumi aboa yɛn kɛse. Nhwɛsoɔ:

• Obi a w’ani gye ho a wubebisa no sɛ ɔne no nkɔda.
• Asɛm bi a wobɛbisa sukuu kyerɛkyerɛfoɔ anaa ɔkyerɛkyerɛfoɔ.
• Ɔkasa pa a wobɛkasa bere a worekɔyɛ adwuma ho nsɛmbisa no.
• Sotɔɔ bi a wobɛkɔ na woabisa nea wopɛ pɛpɛɛpɛ.

Saa `(Assertiveness)` yi nnyɛ biribi a ɛba obiara so wɔ awosu mu. Nnipa binom yɛ komm paa, wosuro sɛ wɔbɛka wɔn adwene, na wɔka sɛ "yiw" wɔ biribiara ho. Yɛfrɛ no `(Passive)` kwan so. Afoforo nso wɔ hɔ, ɔkwan a wɔfa so kasa no yɛ katee kakra, te sɛ nea wonnwen afoforo ho. Ɛno na wɔfrɛ no `(Aggressive)` style. `(Assertiveness)` ne kari pɛ a edi mũ wɔ saa abien yi ntam. Ɛte sɛ sika kɔkɔɔ mfinimfini asase no. Enti, dɛn na ɛkyerɛ sɛ wobɛyɛ yɛn ade `(Assertive)`?

• Wubetumi ada w’adwene ne nea wote nka adi pefee.
• Wubetumi abisa nea wopɛ, nea w’ahiade yɛ.
• Sɛ obi ne wo nyɛ adwene a, wubetumi afi obu mu ne no anyɛ adwene .
• Wubetumi de w’adwene ne wo nyansahyɛ ahorow amena.
• Wubetumi aka sɛ "Me ntumi nyɛ eyi" anaa "M'ani nnye eyi ho" a wonte afobu nka.
• Wubetumi nso akasa ama obi foforo, ama wɔn hokwan ahorow.

Dɛn nti na asɛm a wɔka no denneennen ho hia saa?

Afei ebia woresusuw sɛ, so eyi yɛ asɛm kɛse saa ampa? Yiw, ɛnyɛ sɛ Assertiveness boa yɛn ma yenya nea yɛpɛ nko, na mmom ɛkɔ akyiri nso. Sɛ yɛkasa wɔ ɔkwan a ɛyɛ Assertive so a, ɛkyerɛ sɛ yebu yɛn ho ne afoforo . Nnipa a wɔkasa wɔ Assertive kwan so de nkrasɛm no kɔma wiase sɛ wogye wɔn ho di. Wɔnfɛre ade dodo, na saa ara nso na wɔmmɔ mmɔden sɛ wɔbɛpia afoforo akɔ fam. Wonim sɛ wɔn nkate ne wɔn adwene som bo . Wɔwɔ ahotoso pa wɔ wɔn ho. Mpɛn pii no, ɛnyɛ den mma nnipa a wɔyɛ wɔn ade wɔ ɔkwan a ɛyɛ Assertive so sɛ wɔbɛfa nnamfo efisɛ wɔkasa wɔ ɔkwan a ɛkyerɛ obu ma afoforo ne wɔn ankasa ahiade so. Mpɛn pii no, wɔn ho akokwaw wɔ ɔhaw ne adwene a enhyia a wosiesie mu bere a ɛsɔre no. Susuw ho hwɛ, sɛ yɛkyerɛ obu ma afoforo a, yɛsan nya saa obu no.Ɛno ne nokware no.

Wowɔ he? So ɛhɔ yɛ dinn paa? So ɛyɛ den dodo? Anaasɛ ɛteɛ ara kwa?

Afei ma yɛnhwɛ baabi a wugyina wɔ saa nsenia yi a wɔfrɛ no ``Assertiveness.'' Nhwɛso ahorow bi ni:

Pawani asɛm: Ɛyɛ komm dodo kakra... (Too Passive)

Sɛ wo bisa Pawani sɛ, "Sini bɛn na wobɛpɛ sɛ wohwɛ?" ebia ɔbɛka sɛ, "Oh, minnim, ma yɛnhwɛ nea w'ani gye ho." Ɔtaa ma afoforo si gyinae ahorow no, na afei akyiri yi onu ne ho sɛ, "Me yam a anka mekaa saa." Ɔte nka sɛ ne ho yɛ fɛre bere a ne nnamfo nkutoo na wɔrekasa no. Nanso sɛ Pawani bɔ mmɔden sɛ ɔbɛka ne ho mpo a, ɔkasa brɛoo araa ma afoforo kasa fa ne so a wonnim.

Janani asɛm: Ɛte sɛ nea ɛyɛ katee kakra, ɛnte saa? (Ɛyɛ basabasa dodo) .

Janani nsuro sɛ ɔbɛka n’adwene. Nanso sɛ ɔyɛ saa a, ɔyɛ no denden paa, wɔ ɔkwan a n’ankasa adwene nkutoo na ɛteɛ so. Sɛ nkɔmmɔbɔ bi kɔ so a, ɔfa emu fã kɛse no ara, ɔtaa twa afoforo nsɛm mu, na ɔntaa ntie nea afoforo ka. Sɛ wo ne no nyɛ adwene a, ɔde fɛwdi bɛka akyerɛ wo anaasɛ ɔde wo bɛto fam. Nnipa pii ka sɛ Janani yɛ ``bossy`` paa (ɔhyɛ afoforo), na onsusuw afoforo nkate ho.

Benura asɛm: Eyi ne ɔkwan pa! (Nifa Kwan - Assertive) .

Sɛ wubisa Benura adwene a, ɔbɛka akyerɛ wo nokwarem. Sɛ ɔne wo nyɛ adwene a, ɔbɛka a ɔremfa wo nto fam, a ɔremma wonte nka sɛ woadi mfomso. Benura nso ani gye w’adwene ho, na otie nea wowɔ ka no yiye. Sɛ Benura ne wo nyɛ adwene mpo a, wubetumi ate nka sɛ obu w’adwene.

Ɔhaw ahorow a ɛba sɛ woyɛ obi a ɔnyɛ hwee dodo a

Okay, enti momma yensusuw nnipa a wɔyɛ ``Passive`` te sɛ Pawani ho. Ebia wɔbɛte nka bere nyinaa sɛ afoforo de redi dwuma, na wɔreyɛ adwuma de aboa wɔn ankasa. Afei ebia wɔbɛte yaw, wɔn bo afuw, na wɔayɛ abufuw . Sɛ wode nea wususuw ne nea wote nka sie a, afoforo nnya hokwan nhu wo na wɔnte wo ase yiye. W’adwene pa no mfa kuw no, adwumayɛbea, ne abusua no mfaso sɛnea ɛsɛ sɛ ɛba no.

Sɛ wufi ase susuw sɛ, "M'adwene nyɛ hwee, me nkate ho nhia obiara" a, ebetumi atew wo ho mu ahotoso so nkakrankakra. Ebia w’adwene pa no rennya nnye ne nkuranhyɛ a ɛfata. Sɛ tebea yi kɔ so a, ebia wubenya adwene mu tebea te sɛ adwenemhaw mpo .

Ɔhaw ahorow a sɛ woyɛ basabasa dodo a ebetumi asɔre

Afei momma yɛnhwɛ nea ɛba nnipa a wɔyɛ wɔn ade wɔ `(Aggressive)` kwan so te sɛ Janani so. Ebia ɛbɛyɛ den ama wɔn sɛ wɔbɛkɔ so akura nnamfo na wɔakura abusuabɔ pa mu. Ebia wɔbɛbɔ mmɔden ahyɛ afoforo so wɔ nkɔmmɔbɔ mu, ada wɔn adwene adi denneennen na wɔayɛ mpofirim, na afoforo nso betumi ate nka sɛ wonni obu anaasɛ wɔnkyerɛ wɔn ho anisɔ. Ebia nnipa a wɔwɔ `(Aggressive)` style betumi anya nea wɔpɛ afi afoforo hɔ. Nanso mpɛn pii no, wowie sɛ afoforo pow wɔn na wɔn ani nnye wɔn ho. Awiei koraa no, afoforo bu wɔn bio.

Dɛn nti na obiara mfa ne ho nhyɛ mu sɛnea ɛsɛ? Dɛn nti na ɛte saa?

Nokwarem no, dɛn nti na nnipa binom `(Assertive)` te sɛ Benura, bere a afoforo bɛyɛ `(Passive)` te sɛ Pawani anaa `(Aggressive)` te sɛ Janani? Ade biako nti a ɛte saa ne yɛn nipasu. Suban ahorow a yɛanya bere tenten ne osuahu ahorow a yɛanya nso nya so nkɛntɛnso. Bere koro no ara mu no, yesua sɛnea yɛbɛyɛ yɛn ade wɔ `(Assertive)`, `(Passive)`, anaa `(Aggressive)` akwan so denam sɛnea afoforo yɛ wɔn ade a yɛhwɛ so, titiriw sɛnea wɔn a wɔtete yɛn fi mmofraase (awofo, ahwɛfo) yɛ wɔn ade no so.

Ntease ahorow a enti ɛsɛ sɛ yɛyɛ obi a ɔnyɛ hwee:

• Ahotoso a onni wɔ ne ho ne mfaso a ɛwɔ n’ankasa nsusuwii so.
• Adwene a wodwen dodo sɛ wobɛsɔ afoforo ani na woanya wɔn anim dom.
• Osuro a ɛtra so sɛ wɔbɛpow obi anaasɛ afoforo ne ne nsusuwii nnye ntom.
• Sɛ́ wɔbɛte nka kɛse wɔ ɔkasatia ho, anaasɛ osuahu ahorow a atwam a ɛne sɛ wobuu wɔn ani guu wɔn adwene so anaasɛ wɔpowee no apira wɔn.
• Sɛ wɔannya ahokokwaw a ɛho hia na ama wayɛ n'ade wɔ ``assertive'' kwan so.

Ntease ahorow a enti ɛsɛ sɛ yɛyɛ basabasa:

• Sɛ́ wubenya ahotoso dodo no kyerɛ sɛ wubesusuw sɛ wo nkutoo na woteɛ.
• Adwuma a obi bɛyɛ de asi n’ankasa ahiade ne n’adwene nkutoo so dua, a onsusuw afoforo ho.
• Esiane sɛ na wonsuaa sɛnea wobebu afoforo adwene, wɔn nkate, ne wɔn ahiade na wɔasusuw ho nti.
• Tie ho nimdeɛ a wonni, ɛnyɛ sɛ wobesua sɛ wobebisa afoforo wɔn adwene.

Nneɛma a ɛboa wo ma woyɛ w’ade wɔ ɔkwan a ɛyɛ katee so:

• Ahotoso pa a wubenya wɔ wo ho .
• Sɛ obi fi ne koma nyinaa mu gye di sɛ ne nsusuwii som bo, ne nkate ho hia, na ɔwɔ hokwan sɛ ɔda no adi.
• Adwene mu ahoɔden ne ahoɔden a wubenya de ahyia ɔkasatia, pow, ne akwanside ahorow bere a aba no.
• Afoforo apɛde ne wɔn ahiade a wobu.
• Wɔn a wɔyɛ wɔn ade wɔ ɔkwan a ɛyɛ katee so a wɔbɛfa wɔn sɛ nhwɛsofo .
• Osuahu pa a wubenya, te sɛ mmuae pa a wubenya bere a wogye w’adwenkyerɛ ahorow toom na wobɛyɛ w’ade wɔ ɔkwan a ɛyɛ katee so.

Yɛbɛyɛ dɛn atumi abɛyɛ nnipa a yɛyɛ katee? Nneɛma a yebetumi de adi dwuma

Asɛmpa no ne sɛ asɛm a wɔka no denneennen yɛ biribi a yebetumi de adi dwuma na yɛanya nkɔso. Nea egye ara ne sɛ wobɛtete wo ho kakra wɔ nkitahodi ho nimdeɛ ne adwempa mu. Ebia nnipa binom benya bi wɔ awosu mu kɛse. Ebia afoforo nso behia sɛ wɔde wɔn ho hyɛ mu kakra. Nanso obiara betumi anya bi . Nneɛma bi a wubetumi ayɛ de aboa ni:

1. Nea edi kan no, hu ɔkwan a wofa so di nkitaho.

Nokwarem no susuw ho sɛ ebia woyɛ ``Assertive'', ``Passive'', anaa ``Aggressive'' kɛse. Afei, si gyinae sɛ wopɛ sɛ wotew wo passiveness anaa aggressiveness so, anaasɛ wo ma wo ``Assertiveness'' a ɛwɔ hɔ dedaw no tu mpɔn.

2. Sɔ nneɛma yi hwɛ na ama wo a wonyɛ hwee no so atew na woayɛ obi a ɔyɛ katee kɛse:

• Hwɛ yiye wɔ nea wususuw, nea wote nka, nea wopɛ, nea w’ani gye ho. Ansa na wobɛka saa nsɛm yi akyerɛ afoforo no, ɛsɛ sɛ w’ankasa wuhu saa nneɛma yi.
• Sɛ obi bisa wo nea wopɛ a, hyɛ no nsow sɛ woka nsɛm te sɛ, "Oh, minnim," "M'ani nnye ho," anaa "Ɛno ye." Gyae saa su no. Fa yɛ wo su sɛ wobɛka nea wopɛ, wɔ nneɛma nketenkete mpo ho. Sɛ nhwɛso no, sɛ obi bisa sɛ, "Wopɛ nea ɛyɛ ahabammono no anaa nea ɛyɛ kɔkɔɔ no?" wobɛtumi aka sɛ, "M'ani begye nea ɛyɛ ahabammono no ho - meda wo ase pii."
• Fa yɛ wo ho sɛ wobɛbisa nneɛma. Sɛ nhwɛso no: "Mesrɛ wo, metumi de saa spoon no atwam wo?" "Me hia pen - so obi wo foforo?" "Wobɛtumi akura nkongua ama me wɔ hɔ?" Sɛ wosua sɛ wobɛbisa nneɛma nketenkete te sɛ yei a, wobɛnya ahokokwaa ne ahotosoɔ a ɛhia na woabisa biribi kɛseɛ na ɛho hia.
• Ka w’adwene. Ka sini bi a wuhui sɛ w’ani gyee ho anaasɛ w’ani nnye ho kyerɛ yɛn, ne nea enti a wususuwii saa.
• Fa " Me" nsɛm te sɛ "M'ani gye ho..." "Mepɛ..." "Mete nka... " Eyi bɛboa wo ma woada wo nkate ne wo nsusuwii adi wɔ w'ankasa wo kwan so.
• Fa nhwɛsoɔ a ɔyɛ katee - obi a ɔnyɛ komm anaasɛ ɔnyɛ basabasa. Bɔ mmɔden sɛ wubesuasua saa onipa no su pa.
• Kae wo ho bere nyinaa sɛ wo nsusuwii ne w’adwene ho hia te sɛ obi foforo de ara pɛ . Eyi a wubehu no yɛ ɔkwan pa a wobɛfa so ayɛ obi a ɔyɛ katee. Asɛm a wɔka no denneennen fi ase denam adwene a wobu wo ho na obu wo ho te sɛ obiara so.

3. Eyinom yɛ afotu bi a ɛbɛma woatumi atew basabasayɛ so na woayɛ obi a ɔyɛ katee:

• Ma afoforo nkasa kan.
• Hwɛ yiye na woantwitware afoforo nsɛm mu. Sɛ woyɛ saa a, kyere no na ka sɛ, "Oh, kyɛ me - wo di kan wie wo deɛ!" na ma onipa foforo no nwie wɔn asɛm no.
• Bisa obi foforo n’adwene na tie no yiye.
• Sɛ wo ne biribi nnye ntom a, bɔ mmɔden sɛ wobɛkyerɛ w’adwene wɔ obu mu, a wommu ɔfoforo no adwene animtiaa. Sɛ nhwɛso no, sɛ́ anka wobɛka sɛ, "Ɛno yɛ nkwasea adwene ankasa" no, ka biribi te sɛ, "Me ne saa adwene no nnye ntom ankasa." Anaasɛ, sɛ́ anka wobɛka sɛ, "Saa onipa no yɛ onipa bɔne ankasa" no, ka biribi te sɛ, "Misusuw sɛ onsusuw afoforo nkate ho kakra."
• Sɛnea yɛadi kan aka no, yɛ wo ho sɛ obi a ɔyɛ n’ade yiye wɔ ɔkwan a ɛyɛ katee so.

4. Ɛsɛ sɛ wɔn a wɔyɛ katee fi awosu mu no ma wɔn tumi kɔ so yɛ kɛse:

• Hwehwɛ `(Assertive)` nhwɛso pa. Suasua wɔn su pa no. (Wubetumi ahu, yɛde afotu yi maa afoforo nso. Nea enti a ɛte saa ne sɛ, yesua nneɛma foforo da biara da wɔ asetra mu!)
• Susuw tebea horow a woyɛ katee kɛse wom no ho. Wɔ nnipa pii fam no, ɛnyɛ den sɛ wɔbɛyɛ katee wɔ tebea horow bi mu (sɛ nhwɛso no, wɔne nnamfonom), nanso wɔ tebea afoforo mu (sɛ nhwɛso no, wɔne akyerɛkyerɛfo, nnipa foforo) betumi ayɛ asɛnnennen. Wɔ saa tebea horow a emu yɛ den no mu no, susuw ho sɛ: “Mɛyɛ dɛn aka eyi akyerɛ me nnamfo paa?” Eyi bɛma nneɛma ayɛ mmerɛw ama wo.

Ade a ɛho hia sen biara a ɛsɛ sɛ yɛkae ne

Awiei koraa no, nea ɛsɛ sɛ woka ni. Sɛ woyɛ ``Assertive'', kyerɛ sɛ, sɛ woka nea ɛwɔ w'adwene mu nokwarem, pefee, nanso obu mu a, ɛkyerɛ sɛnea wugye wo ho di kɛse.

Wowɔ hokwan sɛ woda wo nsusuwii ne wo nkate adi kyerɛ wiase. Afei nso, wowɔ asɛyɛde sɛ wubu afoforo adwene. Assertiveness yɛ abien no nyinaa a wɔaka abom pɛpɛɛpɛ.

Saa ahokokwaw yi a wobɛnya a wɔfrɛ no ``Assertiveness'' no yɛ anammɔn a ɛho hia paa a ɛbɛma woabɛyɛ onipa a wopɛ sɛ woyɛ, wo ``best self''! Enti, fi ase de saa nneɛma yi di dwuma nkakrankakra. Wubetumi ayɛ!

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Assertiveness, nkitahodi, ahotoso a obi wɔ wɔ ne ho, adwene a ɔda no adi, abusuabɔ, adwenemyare, suban