We all know that going through breast cancer treatment is not an easy journey. It can be physically and mentally exhausting. Sometimes, the side effects of treatment can make everyday life very difficult. For reasons like these, you may be thinking twice about continuing treatment. Even though stopping treatment may be the right decision for you, it is not as easy as you think. It is a very difficult and sensitive decision.
This is not a fight, it's your life.
Many people think that stopping treatment means they have failed or that they have hurt someone. Feelings like, "I'm a failure," "I've let everyone down," etc. can come up. But the most important thing you need to understand is that you should make decisions based on what's best for you .
This is not a war. This is your life. No one here has signed up to be a 'combatant'. You have every right to make decisions about your life, your comfort.
There are many things to consider if you decide to stop breast cancer treatment . But no matter what you decide, remember that your medical team will always be with you.
Be sure to talk to your doctor.
When treating cancer, doctors prefer a "shared decision-making" approach. This means that the doctor will explain everything to you, but you make the final decision. The doctor will explain to you the pros and cons of stopping treatment, as well as what other options you have.
"It's not my job to tell anyone what to do," says oncologist Andrea Silber. "My job is to help someone decide what's best for them."
Your doctor will definitely consider these kinds of things when talking to you.
| Things the doctor considers | Simply put... |
|---|---|
| Has the cancer spread? (Advanced cancer) | Is this cancer that has spread to other parts of the body and is difficult to treat? |
| Is cancer curable? (Potentially curable) | Is this a completely curable cancer? |
| Your age and the nature of the cancer | Are you young? Is the cancer aggressive? |
| What treatments have been taken previously? | What kind of treatment have you already received? |
| Are you stopping because of side effects? | Is the main reason for stopping treatment simply because the side effects are unbearable? If so, can we reduce those side effects? |
| Are there any other illnesses? | Do you have any other medical conditions that require treatment besides cancer? |
The reason you're considering stopping treatment is also important . Sometimes people are willing to try alternative treatments that aren't scientifically proven instead of conventional medicine. "It's not my job to tell them that their idea is wrong. But it is my responsibility to provide them with the scientifically valid and evidence-based education and information that I have," says Dr. Silber.
Let's learn about Palliative Care
This is a service that many people don't know about, but it's very important. Palliative care is care that aims to improve your quality of life for the rest of your life when you can't be cured completely. It can be received from the day you are diagnosed.
When you decide to stop treatment, you will receive additional support from palliative care services. This service can help you manage the symptoms that are causing you pain and discomfort, and strengthen you mentally.
There are various specialists on the palliative care team.
- Doctors
- Nurses
- Social workers
- Psychologists
- Chaplains
These people are not just looking at your cancer, they are looking at you as a whole person .
The help you get from the palliative care service:
- Relieving pain or other symptoms (e.g. nausea, difficulty breathing ).
- Managing mental health issues like depression and anxiety.
- Seeking help with financial or legal problems.
- Providing spiritual support.
- Guidance on how to communicate with family.
- Find support groups with people who have had similar experiences to you.
- Providing advice on diet and exercise.
- Help you name a health care proxy to make medical decisions for you in the event you are unable to make decisions.
They can also help you with "legacy work." That means creating something special for your loved ones to remember you by. It could be anything. It could be a collection of your favorite recipes, an old photo album, writing letters to them, or even a recording of your voice.
How to maintain quality of life?
Use telehealth services
You should always be in touch with your doctor. But that doesn't mean you have to go to the hospital all the time. Ask your doctor if you can talk to him on a video call from home and share your information.
Bring your family along on this journey.
Your decision to stop treatment may be difficult for your family to accept. Or they may not understand how to support you now. Ask your doctor or palliative care team to help them explain this. A little explanation can make a big difference.
Get social support.
Talk to friends, relatives, support groups. Talk to anyone who is important to you. Don't be afraid to talk, even to people you haven't spoken to in a long time. If you find it hard to start, you can ask your palliative care team for help with that too.
Prioritize the things that are important to you.
You can't control cancer, but you can control how you spend the time you have left . Plant some flowers in the garden, plan special events, do the things you've always wanted to do. If your symptoms are getting in the way of those things, tell your doctor.
If some plans seem too far away to achieve, the palliative care team can help you approach them creatively. For example, a doctor tells of a time when a woman was able to hear the heartbeat of her unborn grandchild. "Even though she couldn't meet the baby who would be born in six months, she was able to connect with that baby. It was really powerful."
Take-Home Message
- Thinking about stopping cancer treatment is not a failure or a defeat. It is a personal, valid decision you make about your life.
- Talk openly with your oncologist before making any decisions. This is called 'shared decision-making'.
- Palliative care is a service that helps improve your quality of life, manage pain and other symptoms, and provides you with psychological, social, and spiritual support.
- Talk to your family and friends about this. If they have difficulty understanding this decision, seek help from your medical team.
- Use the time you have left to do things you love and that make you happy. Even the small joys in life are worth a lot.
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