Wan Papa in Lɔv: Di Nyu Fes fɔ Papa dɛn na di Wɔl we De Chenj (Modern Fatherhood)

Trade, we wi tink bɔt “papa,” wi kin tink bɔt pɔsin we de kia fɔ di famili, we strikt smɔl, ɛn we de fa frɔm di pikin dɛn, nɔto so? Bɔt tide, dis pikchɔ dɔn chenj bɔku. Di we aw papa de sho in wok ɛn di we aw i lɛk am dɔn chenj. Tide, wi de tɔk bɔt dis chenj we di papa gɛt. Sɔntɛm dis stori kin bi yu stori bak.

Chenj famili patɛn ɛn papa dɛn we nɔ mared

Mek wi tink bɔt wan man we nem Kamal. Sɔm ia bifo dis tɛm, Kamal ɛn in wɛf bin de tɔk bɔt dayvɔs we i nɔ bin de tink se i lɔs in wɛf bikɔs i gɛt at atak. Wan nɛt, Kamal bin lɛf wit di big prɔblɛm we i bin gɛt na in layf. Dat na fɔ mɛn in gyal pikin we ol 12 ia fɔ insɛf.

Na sosayti tide pas aw i bin de bifo. Bɔku difrɛn kayn papa dɛn de bak tide, lɛk papa dɛn we dɔn dayvɔs, papa dɛn we dɔn ol, ɛn papa dɛn we dɔn adopt dɛn. Dis min se di kɔnsɛpt fɔ "papa" dɔn bɔku bɔku naw.

Kamal bin no se papa we nɔ mared kin mɛn pikin fayn fayn wan, jɔs lɛk famili we gɛt tu mama ɛn papa. Bɔt na joyn we ful-ɔp wit prɔblɛm dɛn. As Kamal se, "Fɔ bi mama we nɔ mared, i at pas fɔ bi mama we nɔ mared. Bikɔs sosayti de si mama we nɔ mared as nɔmal. Bɔt we yu luk papa we nɔ mared, bɔku pipul dɛn kin tink se, 'Di pikin fɔ de wit di mama.'"

Lɛk bɔku papa dɛn we nɔ mared, Kamal bin tek in wok siriɔs. I lɛf in wok na di inshɔrans biznɛs ɛn bigin fɔ wok frɔm os. I bin want fɔ ɛp in gyal pikin in skul wok, kuk it, ɛn spɛn tɛm wit am. I se di sikrit we go mek i gɛt sakrifays na fɔ tɔk to in pikin opin wan. Kamal bin tɔk se: “Bɔt mi gyal pikin bin no ɔltɛm se ilɛk wetin wi tɔk bɔt, di las tin we a go disayd fɔ du as mama ɔ papa.

Papa in lɔv strɔng jɔs lɛk aw mama in lɔv strɔng.

Insay wi kɔlchɔ, bɔku tɛm wi kin tink se na mama kin ebul fɔ kia fɔ pikin ɛn lɛk am. Bɔt yu tink se na so i rili bi? Risach dɔn sho se di dip lɔv we papa gɛt fɔ in pikin dɛn nɔ gɛt wan kɔmpitishɔn we yu kɔmpia am to di lɔv we mama de fil.

Papa dɛn we nɔ mared kin gɛt smɔl prɔblɛm we dɛn de mɛn gyal pikin fɔ dɛnsɛf. Ɛspɛshali we di gyal pikin de rich di tɛm we i de bɔn, i kin nid uman we go falamakata am fɔ tɔk to ɛn tɛl am bɔt in prɔblɛm dɛn. Saikɔlɔjis dɛn advays se, “Dɛn kayn tɛm ya, i impɔtant fɔ involv uman figa dɛn we kin bi gud ɛgzampul na di pikin in layf.” Dis kin bi anti, grani, ɔ tayt famili padi.

Sɔm advays dɛn fɔ bi bɛtɛ papa

Ilɛksɛf yu na yɔŋ papa, big papa, ɔ yu na mama ɔ papa we nɔ mared, di men tin dɛn we yu kin fala fɔ bi gud papa na di sem fɔ ɔlman.

1. Fɔgiv yusɛf fɔ mistek.

Sayɛnsman dɛn we de stɔdi bɔt pɔsin in maynd se, “Nɔ tray fɔ bi pafɛkt mama ɔ papa.Bikɔs no pafɛkt mama ɛn papa nɔ de na dis wɔl.” Bi di bɛst papa we yu go ebul fɔ bi. We yu mek mistek ɛn si se yu de lan frɔm dɛn mistek dɛn de, yu pikin dɛn kin lan se i nɔ bad fɔ mek mistek ɛn nɔ pafɛkt. Dat na di gift we valyu pas ɔl we yu go gi pikin.

2. Di lay lay stori bɔt ‘Kwaliti Taym’.

“Wi tink se we yu kam bak na os frɔm wan tranga de na wokples ɛn kɛr yu pikin dɛn go fɔ it pizza ɛn fim Frayde nɛt, dat na ‘kwaliti tɛm.’” Bɔt fɔ tru, sɔv we dɛn dɔn du pan pikin dɛn dɔn sho se pikin dɛn want papa we nɔ strɛs ɛn we nɔ strɛs . Dɛn want fɔ fri frɔm di prɔblɛm dɛn we de na wokples ɛn jɔs “hang ɔut” wit dɛn papa, dat na fɔ spɛn tɛm wit pis.

3. Tin de fo giv pas moni.

Bɔku papa dɛn kin tink se na di mɔni we dɛn de mek fɔ di famili kin no aw dɛn bi papa. Dat impɔtant. Bɔt yu pikin dɛn de ɛkspɛkt mɔ frɔm yu. Aks yusɛf dɛn kwɛstyɔn ya:

• "A wan pas mi valyu to mi pikin?"
• "A wan tich mi pikin aw fɔ yuz kɔmpyuta di we aw a lɛk?"
• "A want mek mi pikin lan aw fɔ lɛk frɔm mi?"

Dɛn tin ya gɛt valyu pas mɔni wan tawzin tɛm.