Ingabe nawe unosizi ongakwazi ukuluthwala? Ake sixoxe ngalo (Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi)

Ngesinye isikhathi empilweni yethu, lapho silahlekelwa umuntu oseduze nathi, kungaba yilungu lomndeni, umngane, noma umuntu esimthandayo, kuyinto evamile ukuzwa usizi nobuhlungu obuningi. Yilokho okungokwemvelo. Lokhu kudabuka kuyaphela kancane kancane ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, bese sijwayela impilo evamile futhi. Kodwa ngezinye izikhathi, lokhu kudabuka akupheli, kunamathela ezinhliziyweni zethu, kuba kubi kakhulu, futhi asikwazi ngisho nokwenza imisebenzi yethu yansuku zonke ngendlela efanele. Yilokho esikubiza ngokwezokwelapha ngokuthi 'usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi ', uhlobo losizi oludlula usizi oluvamile, oluhlala isikhathi eside, futhi olunzima .

Ngakho-ke kuyini lokhu (Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi)?

Kalula nje, usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi luwuhlobo losizi olunamandla kakhulu noluhlala isikhathi eside olwenzeka ngemva kokulahlekelwa othile. Kulolu hlobo losizi, imizwa nemicabango oyizwayo ayipheli ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Kunalokho, ingazizwa sengathi iqhubeka igijima engqondweni yakho, ithatha usuku lwakho lonke, impilo yakho yonke.

Ngokuvamile, uma silahlekelwa othile, sizizwa sengathi sibhajwe emgodini wodaka, silahlekile enkungwini, noma silwela ukuphuma emanzini. Kungase kube nobuhlungu, ukudabuka, mhlawumbe ngisho nentukuthelo. Kodwa ngemva kwesikhathi esithile, siyakuqeda bese siqala ukuphila izimpilo zethu futhi. Kodwa-ke, kulesi simo esibizwa ngokuthi (Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi), lokho akwenzeki. Lolo sizi alupheli ngokwalo. Luthinta umzimba wakho nengqondo yakho, futhi lukwenza ukhathale kakhulu.

Uma une-Complicated Sireef, ungase uzizwe:

• Ngizizwa nginomthwalo ongabekezeleleki ngesizathu sokulahlekelwa noma izehlakalo ezenzeke ngaleso sikhathi.
• Lokhu kulahlekelwa kungenza ngikhathazeke kakhulu ngalokho okuzokwenzeka esikhathini esizayo.
• Bazama ukugwema izinto ezibakhumbuza umuntu abamlahlekile, noma bagcwalise izingqondo zabo ngalezo zinkumbulo.

Odokotela basebenzisa amanye amagama amaningana kulesi simo (I-Complicated Grief):

• `(Usizi olude)` (Usizi olude)
• `(Usizi olungapheli)` (Usizi olungapheli)
• `(Isifo sokushonelwa esiqhubekayo)` (Isifo sokushonelwa esiqhubekayo)

Uyini umehluko phakathi kosizi oluvamile nosizi oluyinkimbinkimbi?

Sonke sibhekana nosizi ngezindlela ezahlukene. Abanye abantu bangaluqeda ezinsukwini ezimbalwa, kanti abanye bangathatha izinyanga. Lokho kuvamile. Kodwa umehluko omkhulu phakathi kosizi oluyinkimbinkimbi nezinye izinhlobo zosizi ukuthi lungahlala izinyanga eziyisithupha noma unyaka ngemva kokulahlekelwa futhi lungathinta impilo yakho yansuku zonke kuze kube yilapho ungakwazi ukusebenza.

Cabanga nje, umama womngane wakho omkhulu uyashona. Emasontweni noma ezinyangeni zokuqala ezimbalwa, kuyinto evamile ukuba adabuke, akhale, alahlekelwe yisifiso sokudla, futhi angalali. Kodwa ngemva konyaka, uma engadli noma engaphuzi kahle, engayi emsebenzini, engakhulumi namuntu, futhi ehlala ekhala futhi ecabanga ngonina olahlekile, khona-ke kudingeka sikhathazeke kancane. Lokho kungaba yindaba (Yosizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi).

Ingabe wonke umuntu ubhekana nosizi ngendlela ehlukile?

Yebo, impela. Nakuba sonke sidabuka lapho sishonelwa othile, indlela esisingatha futhi sibhekane ngayo nalolo sizi ingahluka kuye ngomuntu nomuntu. Kunezici eziningana ezingathinta lokhu:

• Isizinda sakho: indlela owakhuliswa ngayo, okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho.
• Izinkolelo zakho: Izinkolelo zenkolo, umbono ngokuphila.
• Ubuhlobo nomuntu omlahlekile: Ukuthi lowo muntu wayesondelene kangakanani nawe nokuthi wayebaluleke kangakanani empilweni yakho.

Sonke sinobuntu obuhlukile. Futhi indawo esihlala kuyo nayo iyasithonya. Konke lokhu kuthinta indlela esibhekana ngayo nosizi.

Sivame kangakanani lesi simo esibizwa ngokuthi (i-Complicated Grief)?

Ngokusekelwe ocwaningweni olwenziwe kuze kube manje, kulinganiselwa ukuthi cishe abantu abadala abangu-7% ababhekene nosizi bangase babe nosizi oluyinkimbinkimbi. Lesi yisimo esisha esengezwe ku-Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), okuyincwadi ehlukanisa izifo zengqondo. Ngakho-ke, kwenziwa ucwaningo olwengeziwe ngalokhu.

Yiziphi izimpawu ze-Complicated Grief?

Uma une-Complicated Grief, ungase ube nesinye noma ngaphezulu salezi zimpawu:

• Imicabango eminingi ephazamisayo ngokulahlekelwa engenakubekezelelwa.
• Ukuzizwa ulangazelela okukhulu, ubuhlungu obungabekezeleleki engqondweni (ukuzizwa sengathi umuntu olahlekile uzobuya).
• Ukuphika, ukugwema, noma ukunganaki izikhumbuzo zokulahlekelwa. Noma, esikhundleni salokho, ukuzama ukuzizungeza ngezikhumbuzo zomuntu olahlekile (isb. izingubo, izithombe).
• Ukuzizwa sengathi akukho njongo empilweni ngemva kokulahlekelwa.
• Kunzima ukwamukela ukuthi ukulahlekelwa kwenzekile.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi lungabangela nezimo ezilandelayo:

• Imicabango yokuzibulala .
• Ukungalali .
• Ukucindezeleka okukhulu.
• Ukudla akunambitheki.
• Ubunzima bokuxhumana nabanye, ukuzama ukuba wedwa.
• Ukuwohloka kwempilo yomzimba.
• Ubunzima bokugcina ubudlelwano nabanye kanye nokufeza imithwalo yemfanelo yomuntu siqu.

Okubalulekile: Uma wena noma othile omaziyo enemicabango yokuzibulala, sicela ufune usizo ngokushesha kudokotela, umeluleki wezempilo yengqondo , noma othile omethembayo. Ungazishiyi wedwa.

Yiziphi izimbangela (zosizi oluyinkimbinkimbi)?

Isizathu esiyinhloko salesi simo ukulahlekelwa . Kungaba ukufa kothandekayo, isehlukaniso, mhlawumbe ngisho nento efana nokulahlekelwa umsebenzi noma ukufuduka endlini. Ukulahlekelwa kuthinta abantu ngezindlela ezahlukene. Kwabanye, kungaba nomthelela wesikhathi eside.

Ubani osengozini enkulu yokuthola usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi?

Uma unezinye zezici ezilandelayo, ungase ube sengozini encane yokuthola i-Complicated Grief:

• Ukubhekana nokulahlekelwa okungazelelwe, okungalindelekile:Isibonelo, ukufa engozini noma ukuzibulala.
• Ukulahlekelwa umuntu osondelene kakhulu nomndeni wakho: njengomzali, umfowenu noma udadewenu.
• Ukuba nobudlelwano obuseduze kakhulu nomuntu omlahlekile.
• Ukubhekana nokulimala okukhulu ngesikhathi sokulahlekelwa.
• Ukuba nesimo sempilo yengqondo esivele sikhona (isb., `(Ukucindezeleka)` noma `(Ukukhathazeka)`).

Yiziphi izinkinga ezingaba khona ngenxa ye-Complicated Grief?

Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi lungathinta ingqondo yakho kanye nomzimba wakho. Ezinye zezinkinga zempilo zesikhathi eside ezingavela ngenxa yalo lusizi zifaka:

• Ukucindezeleka .
• Ukukhathazeka .
• Ukungondleki kahle noma ukuphelelwa amanzi emzimbeni (okubangelwa ukungadli noma ukungaphuzi kahle).
• Isifo sokucindezeleka ngemva kokwethuka (PTSD) .
• Isifo senhliziyo .
• Umfutho wegazi ophakeme.
• Inkinga yokusebenzisa izidakamizwa noma inkinga yokusebenzisa utshwala. Njengoba bengakwazi ukubhekana nobuhlungu, abanye abantu bangase baphendukele otshwaleni noma ezidakamizweni, okwenza isimo sibe sibi kakhulu.

Ungayibona Kanjani (Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi)?

Udokotela nguyena ongakwazi ukunquma ngempela ukuthi unesizungu esiyinkimbinkimbi noma cha. Uzocabangela lezi zici ezilandelayo:

• Ukuthi izimpawu zakho zosizi zithinte impilo yakho yomzimba, yengqondo kanye neyenhlalo .
• Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi lezi zimpawu ziyaqhubeka yini ngemva kokulahlekelwa okungenani unyaka uma kwenzeka kumuntu omdala, noma izinyanga eziyisithupha uma kwenzeka ingane encane.
• Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ubulokhu ubhekene nalezi zimpawu nsuku zonke okungenani inyanga ngaphambi kokuxilongwa.

Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukuze aqinisekise ukuxilongwa, udokotela uzobheka okungenani ezintathu zezimpawu ezilandelayo:

• Kuzwakala sengathi ingxenye yakho ifile kanye nokulahlekelwa.
• Ukungafuni ukwamukela ukuthi ukulahlekelwa kwenzekile.
• Ukugwema izinto ezikukhumbuza ngokulahlekelwa.
• Ukuzwa ubuhlungu obukhulu engqondweni.
• Ukungakwazi ukuzibandakanya emisebenzini yokuxhumana nomndeni nabangane.
• Ukulahlekelwa imizwa, noma umuzwa wokuba ndikindiki ngokomzwelo.
• Ukuzizwa sengathi impilo ayinayo incazelo ngemva kokulahlekelwa.
• Isizungu, umuzwa wokuhlukaniswa nabanye.

Yiziphi izindlela zokwelapha i-Complicated Grief?

Kunezindlela zokwelapha usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi. Abantu abaningi bathola ukwelashwa okubizwa ngokuthi i-Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) kuwusizo kakhulu. Kalula nje, i-CBT:

• Ukukusiza wamukele iqiniso lokulahlekelwa.
• Ukukusiza ukuthi ujwayele impilo ngalokhu kulahlekelwa.
• Ukukusiza ukuthi uphinde uhlangane nezinto owazenza ngaphambi kokuba ulahlekelwe yizo, abantu owawunabo.
• Ukukusiza ukufeza imigomo yakho siqu ngokuphulukisa ngokwengqondo nangokomzimba.

Futhi, ukujoyina amaqembu okusekela abantu abashonelwe kungaba usizo kakhulu. Lawa amaqembu lapho abantu abaye babhekana nokulahlekelwa okufanayo njengoba nawe ungahlangana khona futhi uqonde ubuhlungu bakho. Lapho ungabelana ngokuhlangenwe nakho kwakho, ulalele abanye, futhi uzizwe sengathi awuwedwa.

Uma unezinye izinkinga ngenxa ye-Complicated Grief, njengokucindezeleka, udokotela wakho angase akunike imithi efana ne -antidepressants .

Ngizozizwa ngingcono ngokushesha kangakanani ngemva kokwelashwa?

Akukho sikhathi esiqondile salokhu. Inqubo yokululama yawo wonke umuntu kanye nezinga lokululama kuhlukile. Kungathatha izinyanga, noma kungathatha iminyaka ukuthi uqale ukuzizwa ungcono. Umeluleki wakho uzosebenza nawe ukuhlela ukwelashwa kwakho ngokusekelwe emigomweni yakho. Kubalulekile ukuba nesineke nokuzinikela ekwelashweni kwakho.

Yini okufanele ngiyilindele uma nginayo (Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi)?

Ukuphila nokulahlekelwa akulula. Ingqondo yakho igcwele imizwa, futhi ingathinta nempilo yakho yomzimba. Uma le micabango nemizwa ithatha indawo yokuphila kwakho, funa iseluleko sezokwelapha nakanjani. Uma ukuthola kunzima ukubhekana nawe wedwa, cela usizo kulungu lomndeni noma kumngane omethembayo, njengokuya kudokotela wokuqala.

Khumbula, usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi luyisimo esingelapheka. Ungaba ngcono ngokwelashwa namaqembu okusekela. Uma ungaqiniseki ukuthi uzoqala kuphi, khuluma nomhlinzeki wakho oyinhloko wokunakekelwa. Angakunikeza isiqondiso osidingayo. Futhi uma usizi lwakho luthinta impilo yakho engokomzimba, angakusiza nangalokho.

Ingabe Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi lungavinjelwa?

Ayikho indlela yokuvimbela ngokuphelele usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi. Kodwa-ke, kunezinto ongazenza ukuze unciphise ingozi yakho:

• Ukukhuluma nomeluleki wezempilo yengqondo ngemva kokulahlekelwa.
• Ukwakha uhlelo oluqinile lokusekela abantu abakuthandayo nabakuqondayo.
• Ukujoyina iqembu lokusekela usizi ngemva kokulahlekelwa.

Kufanele ngimbone nini udokotela?

Uma usazizwa usizi olukhulu ngisho nonyaka ngemva kokulahlekelwa, futhi usizi lukuvimbela ekwenzeni imisebenzi yakho yansuku zonke nokuphila impilo evamile, kufanele nakanjani ubone udokotela.Udokotela angakusiza ukuthi ululame.

Ikakhulukazi, uma uzizwa ucindezelekile ngokuphila futhi unemicabango yokuzibulala, sicela ungephuzi umzuzwana bese ucela iseluleko sezokwelapha ngokushesha noma utshele umuntu omethembayo.

Yimiphi imibuzo okufanele ngiyibuze udokotela wami?

Uma uvakashela udokotela, kungaba usizo ukubuza imibuzo efana nale:

• Yiziphi izinsiza zokushonelwa ezitholakalayo ezingisiza ngibhekane nosizi? Ngingazibhekisela kuzo?
• Ingabe kufanele ngikhulume nochwepheshe wezempilo yengqondo ?
• Ingabe kuzodingeka ngithathe imithi? Uma kunjalo, yimiphi imiphumela emibi?
• Ingabe lesi simo (sosizi oluyinkimbinkimbi) sizoba nemiphumela yesikhathi eside kimi?
• Ngibuyela kanjani esimisweni sami esijwayelekile?
• Nginemicabango yokuzibulala. Ungangisiza ngithole ukwelashwa kwayo?

Okokugcina, khumbula... (Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya)

Usizi Oluyinkimbinkimbi lungazwakala njengomthwalo omkhulu esifubeni sakho, umjikelezo ongapheli wobuhlungu obungokomzwelo. Kungaba nzima ukunqoba lo mthwalo wedwa ngaphandle kokwelashwa. Nakuba izimpawu zakho zingase zithuthuke ngokuhamba kwesikhathi ngokwelashwa okufana ne-Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), imizwa ehlobene nokulahlekelwa ingaphinde ivele empilweni yakho yonke. Amaholide nemikhosi yokugubha kungaba nzima kakhulu.

Kodwa into ebaluleke kakhulu ukuqonda ukuthi awuwedwa kulolu hambo. Kunabantu abangakusiza, babe nawe, futhi bakulalele phakathi nalezi zikhathi ezinzima nezinselele kakhulu. Ngakho-ke ungalokothi unqikaze ukucela usizo, ukukhuluma, nokufuna ukwelashwa. Ungalulama.

Usizi oluyinkimbinkimbi, ukudabuka, ukulahlekelwa, impilo yengqondo, ukwelashwa kosizi, i-CBT, ukwelulekwa kwengqondo