Uma sizwa igama elithi ukucindezeleka, iningi lethu licabanga ngokushesha ngezinto zengqondo ezifana nokudabuka, isizungu, ukukhungatheka, kanye nomuzwa wokungafuni ukwenza lutho. Kuyiqiniso, lezi yizimpawu eziyinhloko zokucindezeleka. Kodwa bewazi ukuthi lesi simo sengqondo sinomthelela omkhulu emzimbeni wakho? Ngezinye izikhathi, isizathu sangempela sezifo ezihlukahlukene zomzimba, izinhlungu, kanye nokungakhululeki osuzizwa isikhathi eside kungaba yilokhu kucindezeleka engqondweni yakho.
Lezi akuzona nje "izinto ezicatshangwayo." Ukucindezeleka yisimo esingabangela izinguquko emzimbeni wakho. Isibonelo, kungalibazisa ukugaya kwakho futhi kubangele izinkinga zesisu. Ngenxa yokuthi lezi zimpawu zomzimba zingavela kwezinye izifo eziningi, abantu abaningi abazifuni ukwelashwa kwazo. Abacabangi ngisho nokuthi izinkinga zabo zomzimba zingabangelwa yisimo sengqondo. Ngezinye izikhathi, ngisho nodokotela bangaphuthelwa ukuxhumana.
Kungani ukucindezeleka kubangela ubuhlungu emzimbeni?
Ukuze siqonde lokhu, sidinga ukubheka kalula indlela ubuchopho obusebenza ngayo. Kunezinethiwekhi zezinzwa ebuchosheni bethu ezilawula imizwa, njengokudabuka nenjabulo. Ngokumangalisayo, ezinye zezinethiwekhi zezinzwa ezisibangela ukuba sizwe ubuhlungu obungokomzimba nazo zisebenza ngokubambisana nalezi zinethiwekhi ezilawula imizwa.
Ngakho-ke, kumuntu onesifo esifana nokucindezeleka, la manethiwekhi ezinzwa ebuchosheni awasebenzi kahle. Ngakho-ke, ochwepheshe abaningi bakholelwa ukuthi indlela umuntu onesifo sokucindezeleka azizwa ngayo ubuhlungu ihlukile kumuntu ovamile. Bangase bazizwe ubuhlungu obukhulu kakhulu. Lokho kusho ukuthi noma yibuphi ubuhlungu osunabo kakade, njengobuhlungu bomhlane, bungase bube bubi kakhulu ngokucindezeleka.
Kalula nje, okwenzekayo lapha ukuthi ubuhlungu enhliziyweni yakho buphuma njengobuhlungu emzimbeni wakho. Lokhu kokubili kuhlobene.
Izimpawu ezivame kakhulu zomzimba zokucindezeleka
Kulungile, ake sibheke izimpawu ezivame kakhulu zomzimba zokucindezeleka nokuthi zingase zikwenze uzizwe kanjani. Bona ukuthi unayo yini eyodwa noma ngaphezulu kwalezi.
| Izimpawu Zomzimba | Kuzwakala kanjani lokho? |
|---|---|
| Ubuhlungu bekhanda | Ikhanda elibuhlungu elihlala njalo. Ngezinye izikhathi awukwazi ngisho nokuthola ukuthi yini ebangela lokhu. Uma uke waba nekhanda elibuhlungu ngaphambili, lingaba libi nakakhulu. |
| Ubuhlungu Bomhlane, Imisipha Namalunga | Umhlane wami uhlaba njalo ngaphandle kwesizathu, imisipha yami iyabuhlungu, amalunga ami ayabuhlungu. Ngizizwa sengathi ngikhathele, kodwa angikhathele kangako. |
| Ubuhlungu Besifuba | Lokhu kuyinto okufanele uyiqaphele kakhulu. Ubuhlungu besifuba bungaba uphawu lwesimo esibucayi enhliziyweni, emaphashini, noma esiswini. Ngakho-ke uma unesifo sesifuba, qiniseka ukuthi ubona udokotela noma uye e-ETU (Emergency Treatment Unit). Kodwa-ke, ngezinye izikhathi ukucindezeleka nakho kungabangela ukungakhululeki okunjalo. |
| Izinkinga Zokugaya Ukudla | Ukuphazamiseka kwesisu, isicanucanu, ukuqunjelwa, izinhlungu zesisu, njll. Abanye abantu bahlushwa uhudo, abanye bahlushwa ukuqunjelwa. |
| Izinguquko ekufiseni ukudla noma isisindo | Abanye abantu balahlekelwa yiso sonke isifiso sokudla bese bencipha isisindo. Abanye bakhuluphala ngokufisa ukudla okuqukethe ama-carbohydrate (isinkwa, ilayisi, amaswidi). |
| Ukukhathala Nokukhathala | Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi ulala kangakanani, awuzizwa ukhathele. Ngisho nokuvuka embhedeni ekuseni kuzwakala sengathi kunzima kakhulu, mhlawumbe akunakwenzeka. Uzizwa ungenampilo usuku lonke. |
| Izinkinga Zokulala | Abantu abaningi banenkinga yokulala ebusuku. Bavuka ekuseni futhi abakwazi ukuphinda balale. Noma banenkinga yokulala amahora amaningi ngemva kokulala. Ngokuphambene nalokho, abanye abantu balala kakhulu kunokujwayelekile. |
| Isiyezi noma Ubumpumputhe | Ngezinye izikhathi ukuzizwa unesizungu noma unenkinga yokuma nakho kungaba uphawu lokucindezeleka ngokomzimba. |
Senzani ngalezi zici zomzimba?
Uma usunesinye noma ngaphezulu salezi zimpawu zomzimba isikhathi eside, ungacabangi nje ukuthi "zizolulama zodwa." Qiniseka ukuthi ukhuluma nodokotela wakho ngalokhu.
Yenza lokhu ngaphambi kokuya kudokotela.
Uma ukwazi, bhala ngezimpawu zakho encwadini encane, njengedayari yezimpawu.
- Hlobo luni lobuhlungu engibuzwile namuhla? (isib. ikhanda elibuhlungu, ubuhlungu bomhlane)
- Kubi kangakanani? (Linganisa esikalini esingu-1-10)
- Yisiphi isikhathi sosuku owazizwa ngaso kakhulu?
- Ngangenzani ngaleso sikhathi?
- Ngizizwe kanjani? (Ingabe bengidabukile, ngithukuthele, ngicindezelekile?)
Ngokubhala phansi imininingwane efana nale, kuzoba lula kakhulu kuwe nodokotela wakho ukuqonda ukuxhumana phakathi kwalezi zimpawu nesimo sakho sengqondo.
Yiziphi izindlela zokwelapha?
Ezimweni eziningi, uma uthola ukwelashwa okufanele kokucindezeleka kwakho (ukwelulekwa, imithi, noma kokubili), lezi zimpawu zomzimba zizoncipha ngokwemvelo.
- Imithi: Eminye imithi yokucindezeleka isebenza ngokubuyisela ukusebenza kwamakhemikhali (ama-neurotransmitter) athwala imiyalezo phakathi kwamangqamuzana ezinzwa ebuchosheni engikhulume ngawo ekuqaleni. Njengoba isimo sakho sengqondo sithuthuka, ubuhlungu bakho bomzimba buzoqala ukwehla. Udokotela wakho angase akunike imithi efana ne-'duloxetine' kanye ne-'venlafaxine', ewusizo kakhulu ekuphatheni ubuhlungu obungapheli, kanye nemithi emidala efana ne-'amitriptyline'.
- Ezinye izindlela zokwelapha: Uma unenkinga yokulala, udokotela wakho angase anqume ukukunikeza umuthi ohlukile walokho. Njengoba ubuhlungu nokucindezeleka kuhambisana, ukunciphisa ubuhlungu kungasiza futhi ekunciphiseni ukucindezeleka.
- Ukwelashwa Kokuziphatha Kokuqonda (i-CBT): Lolu uhlobo lokwelulekwa. Lukufundisa indlela yokubhekana kangcono nobuhlungu bakho nokushintsha indlela ocabanga ngayo ngabo. Lokhu kungaba nemiphumela emihle kokubili empilweni yakho yengqondo neyomzimba.
Into ebalulekile ukuthi, akudingeki ubhekane nalezi zinto wedwa. Ukucela usizo kuyakunika amandla. Udokotela wakho ukulungele ukukusiza.
Umlayezo Wokuya Nawe Ekhaya
- Ukucindezeleka akugcini nje engqondweni kuphela, kodwa futhi kungabangela ubuhlungu bangempela kanye nokungakhululeki emzimbeni wakho.
- Ubuhlungu bekhanda obuvamile, izinhlungu zomzimba, ukuphatheka kabi kwesisu, ukukhathala okukhulu, nezinkinga zokulala kungaba izimpawu zomzimba zokucindezeleka.
- Lezi zici zomzimba aziyona "into oyiqambile engqondweni yakho." Zinesizathu sebhayoloji. Ngakho ungazinaki.
- Khuluma nodokotela wakho ngokukhululekile ngazo zonke izimpawu zakho zengqondo nezomzimba. Kungase kube nokuxhumana phakathi kwalokhu okubili.
- Uma ukucindezeleka kwelashwa kahle, lezi zimpawu zomzimba ezikhathazayo zivame ukuphela kancane kancane, ngakho ungesabi ukufuna usizo.
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