Abantu abaningi bacabanga ukuthi ukukhulelwa yisikhathi esijabulisa kakhulu empilweni yabo. Kodwa empeleni, kwabanye abantu, lesi sikhathi singaba isikhathi esidabukisayo nesikhathazayo kakhulu. Uma uzizwa ngendlela efanayo, ungacabangi ukuthi, "O, ingabe yimi ngedwa onje?" Lokhu kuyinto eyenzeka kubantu abaningi. Nakuba sivame ukuzwa ngokucindezeleka kwangemva kokubeletha, lesi simo esenzeka ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa ngokwaso, okungukuthi, ukucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha, akukhulunywa kakhulu ngaso. Ngakho-ke namuhla, ake sixoxe ngalokhu ngokuningiliziwe.
Kuyini Ukucindezeleka Kwangaphambi Kokuzalwa?
Kalula nje, ukucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha ukucindezeleka okwenzeka ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa. Kungakwenza uzizwe udangele futhi ungenalutho isikhathi eside. Kodwa-ke, akubona bonke abantu ababhekana nalezi zimpawu ngendlela efanayo.
Kunezizathu ezimbili eziyinhloko ezenza kube nzima ukuthola lesi simo.
1. Umbono Wezenhlalo: Kunombono omkhulu wezenhlalo wokuthi ukukhulelwa yisikhathi sokujabula. Ngakho-ke lapho bezizwa bedabukile, abesifazane abaningi bazizwa benecala ngabo. Bacabanga ukuthi, "Angisiye umama omuhle yini?"
2. Ukudideka ngezimpawu zokukhulelwa ezivamile: Kulula ukudideka lezi zimpawu zokucindezeleka nezinye izimpawu zokukhulelwa, njengokukhathala, ukulahlekelwa yisifiso sokudla, kanye nokushintshashintsha kwemizwelo njalo.
"Ezinye zeziguli zethu ngisho nodokotela bathi, 'Lesi yisikhathi lapho kufanele ujabule kangaka. Awukwazi ukudabuka.' Ngakho-ke uma uzizwa ngale mizwa, abantu abaningi bazizwa benesizungu, becabanga ukuthi, 'O, kukhona okungahambi kahle ngami, yimi ngedwa ohlupheka kanje.' Sitshela iziguli zethu ukuthi ungazizwa imizwa eminingana ngesikhathi esisodwa. Ngenkathi ujabule ngokuba nomntwana, ungazizwa ungaphilile kahle engqondweni. Lokho kuvamile. Into ebalulekile ukungafihli leyo mizwa bese uhlupheka wedwa, kodwa ukucela usizo."
Uma unalezi zimpawu, kubalulekile ukukhuluma nodokotela wakho ukuze uthole ukuthi ngabe ukukhathala okuvamile noma okunye.
| Izimpawu ezivamile zokucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha | |
|---|---|
| Usizi olukhulu noma ukungabi nalutho | Ukuzizwa sengathi konke kuyacasula, ukuzizwa udabukile kakhulu. |
| Angizizwa ngijabule | Angisenaso isithakazelo noma injabulo ekwenzeni izinto engangizijabulela. |
| Ubunzima bokugxila | Ubunzima bokugxila entweni ethile nokwenza izinqumo. |
| Ubuthakathaka | Ukuzizwa ukhathele kakhulu kunokujwayelekile ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa futhi ungakwazi ukwenza lutho. |
| Imicabango elimazayo | Ukuba nemicabango yokuzilimaza noma yokuzibulala. Lesi yisimo esiphuthumayo esibucayi kakhulu. |
Ubani osengozini enkulu yalesi simo?
Nakuba kuvamile ukuba nokushintshashintsha kwemizwelo ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa, abanye abantu banamathuba amaningi okuthola ukucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha. Ake sibheke ukuthi yiziphi lezo zici eziyingozi.
| Isici sengozi | Incazelo |
|---|---|
| Umlando wangaphambilini | Uma wena noma othile emndenini wakho wake waba nezimo ezifana nokucindezeleka noma ukukhathazeka. |
| Ukucindezeleka okukhulu kwengqondo | Ukubhekana nezimo ezicindezelayo njengezinkinga zomshado, ukulahlekelwa umsebenzi, noma ukugula kwelungu lomndeni. |
| Ukuntuleka kokusekelwa komphakathi | Uma ungatholi ukwesekwa okwanele kumyeni wakho, umndeni, noma abangane. |
| Ukuxhashazwa kwangaphambilini | Uma uke wahlukunyezwa noma wahlukunyezwa ngaphambilini. |
| Ukukhulelwa okungahleliwe | Ukukhulelwa okungazelelwe noma okungalindelekile. |
| Ezinye izinkinga zempilo | Ukuba nezinye izimo zezokwelapha ezifana nesifo sikashukela sokukhulelwa ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa noma ukuba nenkinga yempilo ngomntwana ongakazalwa. |
Kungani ukucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha kwenzeka?
Akukho sizathu esisodwa salokhu. Kungaba yinhlanganisela yezizathu eziningi. Esinye sezizathu eziyinhloko ukushintsha kwama-hormone . Cabanga ngakho, ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa, amazinga omzimba wethu ama-hormone ocansi, ama-hormone okucindezeleka, nama-hormone e-thyroid ashintsha ngokushesha. Ubuchopho babanye abantu buzwela kakhulu kulezi zinguquko zama-hormone. Lokhu kuzwela kungase kube nofuzo. Abantu abanjalo banamathuba amaningi okuthuthukisa izimpawu zokucindezeleka ngenxa yalezi zinguquko zama-hormone.
Ngaphezu kwalokho, ukukhathazeka ngezinguquko zomzimba, izinkinga zezimali, kanye nezinye izinkinga eziyinkulungwane nakho kungathinta lesi simo.
Yiziphi izindlela zokwelapha lokhu?
Uma ucabanga ukuthi unesifo sokucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha, into ebaluleke kakhulu okufanele uyenze ukubona udokotela wakho ngokushesha okukhulu bese ukhuluma ngakho. Ungacabangi nje ukuthi, "Lokhu kuyinto evamile ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa." Ukuthola ukwelashwa kubalulekile empilweni yakho kanye neyomntwana wakho.
Ngaphambi kokuqala ukwelashwa, kubalulekile ukucabanga ngokuthi usunesikhathi esingakanani unalezi zimpawu nokuthi ziphazamisa kangakanani imisebenzi yakho yansuku zonke (isib., ukungakwazi ukuya emsebenzini, ukungakwazi ukukhuluma nomndeni, ukungakwazi ukuphuma endlini).
Imithi
Eminye imithi yokucindezeleka ingasetshenziswa ngokuphephile ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa, kodwa le mithi kufanele inqunywe udokotela kuphela . Udokotela wakho uzonquma ukuthi yimuphi umuthi okulungele wena ngokusekelwe esimweni sakho sezokwelapha, umlando wezempilo odlule, kanye nezingozi zempilo enganeni yakho.
Okubalulekile:Uma uphuza imithi yokucindezeleka ngaphambi kokuba ukhulelwe, ungalokothi uyeke ukuyiphuza ngaphandle kokukhuluma nodokotela wakho. Izingozi zokungayisebenzisi imithi zingaba zinkulu kakhulu kunokusebenzisa imithi. Futhi, eminye imithi yamakhambi, njenge-St. John's wort, ayiphephile ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa, ngakho-ke ungasebenzisi lutho ngaphandle kweseluleko sikadokotela.
Ukwelulekwa Nokwelashwa
Ngaphezu kwemithi, lesi simo singaphathwa kahle ngezindlela ezahlukene zokwelapha. Lokhu akubeki zingozi zomzimba kuwe noma enganeni yakho.
- Ukwelapha Ngengxoxo: Ungakhuluma ngemizwa yakho nodokotela wezokwelapha futhi ufunde izindlela zokuyilawula.
- Ukwelashwa Kokuziphatha Kokuqonda (i-CBT): Kulokhu, sithola izindlela zethu zokucabanga ezimbi bese sizijwayeza ukuzishintsha zibe yizindlela ezinhle.
- Ukwelashwa Kokuxhumana Nabantu (IPT): Lokhu kukusiza ukuthi uqonde ukuthi imizwa yakho ithinta kanjani ubudlelwano bakho futhi kuqinise ubudlelwano bakho nabanye.
- Ukwelashwa Kwamaqembu: Ukukhuluma nabanye abanokuhlangenwe nakho okufana nokwakho kanye nokusebenza nodokotela wezokwelapha kungaba impumuzo enkulu.
Yiziphi izingozi uma zingelashwa?
Uma lesi simo singalashwa, singathinta wena kanye nomntwana wakho ongakazalwa.
- Umthelela kuwe: Lokhu kungaba izinto ezifana nokungadli ukudla okunomsoco, ukungafiki emitholampilo ngesikhathi, nokuphendukela ekubhemeni noma otshwaleni.
- Umthelela enganeni: Impilo yengqondo kamama ithinta ngqo intuthuko yengane. Ucwaningo luthole ukuthi omama abanokucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha basengozini enkulu yokuthola izingane ezinesisindo esiphansi.
Kubaluleke kakhulu: Uma unemicabango yokuzilimaza wena noma ingane yakho engakazalwa, ungalibali uye esibhedlela ngokushesha noma utshele othile omethembayo bese ucela usizo lwezokwelapha ngokushesha.
Ubhekana kanjani nalesi simo?
Ngaphezu kokwelashwa ngemithi, kunezinto ongazenza wena ngokwakho.
- Hlala umatasa: Ngemvume kadokotela wakho, ukwenza ukuzivocavoca okulula njengokuhamba nsuku zonke kungasiza ekuthuthukiseni imizwa yakho. Kubalulekile futhi ukuphuma ukhulume nabanye abantu esikhundleni sokuhlala ekhaya.
- Ukudla okuhle nokulala: Yidla ukudla okunomsoco. Phuza amanzi anele usuku lonke. Zama ukulala ngokwanele ngangokunokwenzeka.
- Thola ukwesekwa:Khuluma ngokukhululekile ngemizwa yakho nomyeni wakho, umndeni wakho, kanye nabangani. Cela usizo kubo. Ungase ukwazi ukuthola ngamaqembu okusekela omama abakhulelwe esibhedlela sakho noma endaweni yakini.
- Nciphisa ukucindezeleka: Izinto ezifana nokuzindla, i-yoga, kanye nokuzivocavoca ngokuphefumula zingakusiza ukuthi uthole ukuthula kwengqondo.
Umlayezo Wokuya Nawe Ekhaya
- Ukucindezeleka kwangaphambi kokubeletha akusona ubuthakathaka bakho, kuyisimo esingelapheka. Kwenzeka kubantu abaningi.
- Uma uzizwa udabuke kakhulu noma ukhathazekile okuhlala isikhathi esingaphezu kwamasonto amabili, ngale kokukhathala okuvamile okuzwayo ngesikhathi sokukhulelwa, qiniseka ukuthi ukhuluma nodokotela wakho.
- Kunemithi kanye nokwelashwa kwalokhu okuphephile kuwe kanye nomntwana wakho.
- Ukungayilaphi kungabeka impilo yakho neyengane yakho engozini.
- Awuwedwa kulolu hambo. Ukucela usizo kuwuphawu lwamandla.
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