When you think of ADHD , you probably think of a fidgety, jumpy little kid. But the truth is, it's a lot different. Someone you know - a coworker at work, your best friend, maybe even your own spouse - could have the condition. Even if they don't show the typical mischievous traits we think of, they may be struggling with it deep down.
Although doctors still don't know exactly what ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) is or what causes it, it is a real condition. Researchers believe that it has a genetic component. This means that 85% of people with ADHD have a family member who also has the condition. The environment we live in, brain injuries, diet, and the way our brain's neural connections work can also play a role. Whatever the cause, they know how true this is for someone living with symptoms such as inattention, hyperactivity, and impulsive behavior.
Adults can also get ADHD
Yes, this is not limited to children. A significant percentage of adults have ADHD. You may not have been diagnosed with it as a child, but you must have had these symptoms before the age of 12. While some people cope with these symptoms successfully as children, they find it difficult to manage them with the responsibilities and pressures that come with adulthood.
Your symptoms as an adult may be different than they were when you were a child. For example, adults may have fewer of the mischievous, hyperactive symptoms. But that doesn't mean they don't have ADHD. Some people are diagnosed at a young age, while others aren't diagnosed until they're adults. Others live without even knowing they have the condition.
However, they all have one thing in common. That is, they hear "theories" about their behavior from friends and relatives. "You're lazy," "You're not responsible," "You should just do something." But such judgmental talk does not help someone struggling with ADHD, and it can be very hurtful.
People with ADHD aren't lazy, their brains just work differently.
You might think that your friend at the office who says he has ADHD is making up excuses to avoid work. On the outside, he may seem uninterested or bored. But what's really happening is that he's having trouble staying focused on the task at hand.
ADHD is not a character flaw. It is a developmental disorder of the brain.
Imagine how hard it is for someone with ADHD to stay focused while you're talking to someone across the table. Their attention is easily distracted by even the smallest thing or noise around them.
Here are some of the symptoms of ADHD seen in adults.
| Symptom | Description |
|---|---|
| Difficulty organizing and completing work | Even if you start a big project, it's difficult to break it down into parts and finish it in an orderly manner. |
| Frequent loss of important things | I'm always looking for things like my phone, keys, and purse. |
| Forgetfulness and loss of attention | When someone is talking, your mind wanders and you forget what was said. |
| Restlessness | It's hard to stay in one place for too long. I'm moving my legs, doing something with my hands. |
| Skipping details | When following instructions or doing work, important details are often overlooked. |
| Lack of patience | It's hard to stand in line and wait for someone else to finish speaking. |
Adults with ADHD dislike boring, routine tasks. For example, filling out forms or writing reports is very boring to them. So they spend a lot of time doing such tasks, or they try to avoid them altogether. As a result, they feel that their lives are very chaotic and out of control. When they struggle to find their phone or forget to pay a bill, they may seem carefree to an outside observer, but in reality they are under a lot of stress.
This is not a lie made up to get medicine.
Some people think that adult ADHD is a myth, that it goes away after adolescence. But in fact, 3 out of 5 children with ADHD continue to live with the condition into adulthood. The sad thing is, very few of them are diagnosed with the condition and seek treatment.
The consequences if left untreated are serious. You could lose your job, become addicted to drugs, or even get into legal trouble and end up in jail.
The stimulants that doctors often prescribe to treat ADHD symptoms are powerful enough to completely change some people's lives. Research has shown that there is no link between these medications and drug addiction if taken exactly as prescribed . So if you think you have ADHD symptoms, it is important to seek medical advice. There are doctors who specialize in adult ADHD in major hospitals and university medical centers.
You can have ADHD without being hyperactive.
Even the quietest, most laid-back person in your group may have ADHD. This is called inattentive type ADHD . These people mainly have trouble paying attention and staying focused.
People with this type of ADHD tend to make careless mistakes, lose things, and stop working halfway through tasks they start. If your partner keeps forgetting to fix a broken window or a leaking faucet, it may not be because they don't care about you or your family, but because of this condition.
They can lead a successful family life.
Just because they don't help with the housework or the kids doesn't mean they don't love their family. As the spouse of someone with ADHD, the most important thing you need to remember is that they are really trying and they want to do things well .
Since they are easily distracted, write down important things you are going to say on a piece of paper. If you suspect that they have forgotten something, encourage them to ask you about it. When you take responsibility for everything, your relationship can become more like a parent-child relationship than a husband-wife relationship. This can lead to resentment and anger between the two of you.
Be involved in their treatment. You can see the changes in their behavior and whether the medication is working. Someone with ADHD can lose confidence and become depressed. Be their biggest strength at that time. Before going to a place like a party, talk about the conversations that might occur there and practice. This can reduce their social anxiety.
There's a reason why you're always angry.
People with ADHD can get angry more easily than others. For example, something that would be normal for others, like being stuck in traffic or missing an important report at the office, can cause them to have a big outburst.
More than half of people with ADHD have difficulty regulating their emotions. Some doctors call this condition deficient emotional self-regulation (DESR) . But when they take stimulant medications, this condition is controlled and brain function returns to normal. Also, treatments such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy can help alleviate these symptoms.
ADHD also has a positive side, it's strength!
Amidst all these challenges, ADHD has its upsides. One study found that college students with ADHD scored higher on tests that measure creativity (drama, music, art, scientific discoveries). Another study found that people with ADHD are more likely to be successful entrepreneurs because of their impulsiveness and ability to hyperfocus.
The most important thing is to help someone you know with ADHD get the right, modern treatment so they can manage the challenging symptoms of the condition, uncover their hidden strengths and abilities, and succeed in life.
Take-Home Message
- ADHD is a real condition that affects not only children but also adults.
- Someone with ADHD is not "lazy" or "irresponsible." Their brains just work differently.
- This is not a weakness of character, but a condition that requires medical advice and treatment. Talk to your doctor about this.
- ADHD symptoms can be successfully controlled with the right treatment and therapy.
- The understanding, patience, and support of your loved ones is the greatest strength a person with ADHD can have.
- People with ADHD have challenges, but they also have special strengths, such as creativity and deep focus.
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