Kodi pali amene amakupangitsani kumva kuti ndinu wolakwa pankhaniyi? (Ulendo Wodziimba Mlandu) - Tiyeni tikambirane za izi!

Kodi munayamba mwagwira ntchito mwakhama tsiku lonse pamene mnzanu wa kuntchito anati, "Chonde ndithandizeni ndi izi, ndani wina kupatula inu?" Kapena munayamba mwagwiritsapo ntchito ndalama zomwe munasunga kuti musangalale chifukwa cha mawu a wachibale wanu? Ngati munayenera kuchita zimenezo pansi pa kupsinjika kwakukulu ndi kudzimva kuti ndinu wolakwa, mwina munali wozunzidwa ndi "Ulendo Wodzimva Wolakwa." Ichi ndi chinthu chomwe timakumana nacho nthawi zambiri m'miyoyo yathu.

Mwachidule, kodi 'ulendo wodzimva kuti ndi wolakwa' ndi chiyani?

'Kudzimva kukhala ndi mlandu' ndi kuyesa kulamulira munthu mwa kumupangitsa kumva kuti ali ndi mlandu kapena wodandaula, kuti achite zomwe akufuna. Kunena zoona, cholinga chake ndi kumupangitsa kumva ngati ndinu munthu woipa ndipo simukumumvetsa ngati simuchita zomwe akunena.

Pali chifukwa chachikulu chomwe njira iyi imagwirira ntchito. Chifukwa chake sitikufuna kukhumudwitsa anthu ofunikira m'miyoyo yathu (makolo, abale, akazi kapena amuna, mabwenzi apamtima). Timalemekeza mgwirizano umenewo. Munthu amene 'akuvutika ndi mlandu' akuloza chikondi ndi mgwirizano umenewu mumtima mwanu. Pogwiritsa ntchito njira imeneyi, amakusokonezani maganizo kuti apeze zomwe akufuna.

Kudzimva wolakwa kwenikweni ndi chinthu chabwino. Kuli ngati chikumbumtima chathu. Ngati takhumudwitsa wina kapena talakwitsa, timamva chisoni komanso kudzimva wolakwa. Kumva kumeneko kumatilimbikitsa kukonza zinthu ndikupepesa. Kumalimbitsa ubale wathu.

Koma 'kudzimva wolakwa' ndi pamene umadzikakamiza kudzimva wolakwa, ngakhale kuti sunachite cholakwika chilichonse. Izi sizothandiza.

N’chifukwa chiyani anthu amachita zinthu motere?

'Kudzimva kuti ndili ndi mlandu' ndi njira yovuta kwambiri yolankhulirana. Munthu amene amachita zimenezi sangathe kufotokoza zosowa zake mwachindunji. Kapena angaone kuti ali pamavuto muubwenziwo.

Njira imeneyi imagwiritsidwanso ntchito posonyeza kusakukondani popanda kunena mwachindunji. Tangoganizani kuti muli ndi amalume omwe simunalankhule nawo kwa nthawi yayitali. M'malo mowauza kuti, "Tinakusowani mwana wanga, ndichifukwa chake tinkalankhula," ngati mutamufunsa kuti, "Chani? Mwaiwala komwe kuli nyumba yathu tsopano?", chomwe chimachitika ndichakuti amakupangitsani kumva kuti ndinu wolakwa ndipo akuyesera kukulamulirani .

Kodi mungadziwe bwanji ngati wina akukupatsani 'Ulendo Wodziimba Mlandu'?

Izi zitha kuchitika m'njira zosiyanasiyana. Nthawi zina amakudzudzulani poyera. Nthawi zina amachita ngati iwowo ndi opanda thandizo. Nthawi zina amakunyozani osanena chilichonse, amangotsitsa manja awo, akupumira, komanso osalankhula.

Tiyeni tiwone zina mwa makhalidwe a 'ulendo wodziimba mlandu' mu tebulo ili.

Izi zingawoneke ngati zinthu zazing'ono, zosasangalatsa, koma zimatha kuwononga ubale wanu wonse. Chifukwa ngati mukunena kuti "ayi" mukapanikizika, mudzamva kupsinjika maganizo. Kapena, ngati mukunena kuti "inde" monyinyirika, mudzamva kukwiya ndi munthuyo. Zotsatira zake, pang'onopang'ono mudzayamba kumupewa munthuyo. Kupewa kumeneku kungakuwonjezereni nkhawa ndi nkhawa .

Zinthu 5 zomwe mungachite kuti musiye 'Ulendo Wodziimba Mlandu'

Kuti mutuluke mu mkhalidwe ngati uwu, kusunga ubale wanu, ndikukhalabe olimba m'maganizo, muyenera kuyankha mwanzeru.

1. Ganizirani za inuyo kaye.

Munthu akakufunsani chinthu, kodi mumamva ngati m'mimba mwanu muli pansi, minofu ya khosi lanu ikulimba, mukaganiza zovomereza? Dzifunseni mafunso awa: " Kodi ndikuyankha mwamaganizo? Kodi chisankho changa n'cholungama? Kodi ndilidi ndi ufulu wokana izi? " Mukayankha mafunso awa moona mtima, mutha kupanga chisankho chomveka bwino popanda kudziimba mlandu.

2. Fotokozani momwe zinthu zilili.

Uzani munthuyo kuti, "Ndikudziwa kuti izi ndizofunikira kwambiri kwa inu. Ndicho chifukwa chake mukuyesera kundipangitsa kumva kuti ndine wolakwa pankhaniyi." Kenako, nenani momveka bwino kuti, "Sindikufuna kumva kuti ndikukakamizidwa kunena 'ayi' ndikukumva chisoni nazo, kapena kukukwiyirani chifukwa chonena 'inde' mosafuna. Chifukwa chake chonde musandiumirize."

3. Auzeni kuti ayambirenso.

Afunseni kuti, "Ndiuzeni mwachindunji zomwe mukufuna kuchokera kwa ine, osakakamiza malingaliro anga." Auzeni kuti apereke pempholi ngati pempho losavuta, popanda kutsutsa kapena kutsutsa.

4. Lemekezani ufulu wanu wonena kuti 'ayi'

Izi ndizofunikira kwambiri kuti muteteze ubale wanu. Uzani munthuyo kuti, "Ndilemekezeni ndikanena kuti 'ayi'. Kenako, ngati ndinganene kuti 'inde', mutha kukhulupirira kuti ndikuchita izi mwaufulu osati mokakamizidwa." Izi zidzawonetsa bwino malire anu.

5. Yankhani mwachikondi ndi mokoma mtima

Njira imodzi yabwino yopewera 'kuvutika ndi mlandu' ndi kukhala wokoma mtima. Uzani munthuyo momwe amakukhudzirani. Mwachitsanzo, munganene kuti:

• "Ndimakuganizirani kwambiri, koma ndikuvutika kuchita izi."
• "Sindikufuna kukukhumudwitsani konse, koma ichi ndi chisankho changa."
• " Pepani sindingathe kukwaniritsa zomwe mukuyembekezera, koma sindingathe kuchita izi pakadali pano."

Mungafunike kubwerezabwereza zinthuzi mobwerezabwereza mpaka khalidwe litasintha. Ngati ndi choncho, dzikumbutseni malire anu mwa kunena kuti, "Takambirana kale za izi..." kapena, molondola, mwa kunena kuti, "Mukundipangitsa kumva ngati ndine wolakwa motere. Zikuwononga ubale wathu. Zikundipangitsa kukwiya nanu, ndipo sindikukonda."

Mwa kudziganizira nokha mwanjira imeneyi, kunena momveka bwino malire anu, ndikulankhulana mwachindunji komanso mokoma mtima, mutha kuyimitsa 'kuvutika ndi mlandu' ndikuteteza thanzi lanu la maganizo komanso ubale wanu wamtengo wapatali.