Xa ulungele ukuzisa omnye umntwana ekhayeni lakho, umbuzo omkhulu engqondweni yakho ngowomntwana wakho omdala, akunjalo? Kuqhelekile ukuba neengcinga ezinje, 'Ngaba uza kundikhumbula?', 'Ngaba uza kuba nomona ngomntwana?'. Ukufika kwelungu elitsha kuthetha utshintsho olukhulu kuwe, kumntwana wakho omdala, kwanakwizilwanyana zasekhaya. Kodwa ungakhathazeki, ngomonde omncinci kunye nokulungiselela okuncinci, sinokujamelana nalo mceli mngeni ngempumelelo enkulu.
Masithethe ngale nto nomntwana omdala.
Ukuba umntwana wakho omdala uya kuqonda kangakanani ngomntakwabo omtsha kuya kuxhomekeka kwiminyaka yakhe. Kodwa ungasondela kuye uze uqale ukuthetha naye ngaloo nto. Bachazele ngokulula ukuba iintsana ezisandul’ ukuzalwa zikhangeleka njani kwaye zenza ntoni. Khawuthelekelele ukuba umntwana wakho omdala usalele ebhedini. Ngoko ke, mthengele ibhedi entsha kwiinyanga ezimbalwa ngaphambi kokuba umntwana omtsha abuye ekhaya uze umqhele. Ngale ndlela, akayi kuziva ngathi "Ndinike umntwana indawo yam." Kwakhona, yeka ukubiza ibhedi yomntwana wakho omdala ngokuthi yeyomntwana wakho omdala uze uqale ukuyibiza ngokuthi "yibhedi yomntwana." Kunjalo nangeempahla zakhe ezindala zomntwana. Mnike uluvo lokuba
"ezi zizinto esizisebenzisela iintsana ekhaya." Ukuba kunokwenzeka, hamba nomntwana wakho omdala xa usiya ekliniki. Mvumele eve
ukubetha kwentliziyo yomntwana. Ungambonisa neefoto zomntwana wakho omdala xa wayesemncinci kwaye umxelele ukuba iintsana zikhangeleka njani kwaye zisela njani ubisi.
Kodwa musa ukuthetha kakhulu ngale nto kwangaphambili. Iinyanga ezili-9 lixesha elide lokuba umntwana omncinci alinde udade okanye umnakwabo. Mvumele azive umntwana ekhaba esiswini sakhe, kodwa ungayenzi ibe yingxoxo enkulu. Ukuba uhlala uthi "inkwenkwe enkulu" okanye "udade omkhulu", kamva usenokuziphatha njengomntwana omncinci kwakhona (regression).
Nokuba uzama kangakanani ukumlungiselela, uza kuqonda kuphela intsingiselo epheleleyo yokuba nomntakwabo omtsha xa ebona umntwana ngamehlo akhe. Usenokucinga ukuba ufumana umntu wokudlala naye njengomnakwabo oneminyaka emi-3 ubudala osecaleni. Ngoko ke kunokubakho umahluko phakathi kwephupha lakhe nenyaniso. Yinto eqhelekileyo leyo. Xa usiya esibhedlele ukuya kudibana nomntwana, faka ifoto yomntwana wakho omdala kwifreyimu uze uyibeke ecaleni kwebhedi yakho. Ungathethi nto ngayo. Abantwana baza kuyibona ngokuqinisekileyo. Emva koko baza kucinga, "Umama akandilibalanga, akandilahlanga."
Kwenzeka ntoni emva kokuba umntwana ebuyele ekhaya?
Nangona umntwana omtsha esenokubonakala enomtsalane kakhulu kumntwana omdala ekuqaleni, emva kwexesha elithile, xa eqonda inyani, unokuziva iimvakalelo ezimbi ezifana nomsindo, usizi, kunye nokukhungatheka.
Oku kuqhelekile kakhulu, ungakhathazeki ngako.Abanye abazali banokuziva belusizi kwaye benesizungu ngeli xesha. Basenokucinga, "Owu, ndenze ntoni kumntwana wam omdala?" Sisenokulila ngenxa yolwalamano olulahlekileyo. Yinto eqhelekileyo leyo. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo
kukwamkela iimvakalelo ezimbi zomntwana wakho njengoko zinjalo. Musa ukumkhalimela okanye ukumgxeka ngenxa yezo mvakalelo. Endaweni yoko, ungamvumeli ukuba ajongane nezo mvakalelo eyedwa, thetha ngazo, kwaye umthuthuzele. Umzekelo, ukuba umntu umbuza athi, "Kutheni uMama ephethe loo mntwana? Awunakusuka nje umlahle?", banokuziva bekhululekile kakhulu. Baza kuqonda ukuba, "Owu, andingomntu ndedwa ovakalelwa ngolu hlobo."
Iingcebiso ezimbalwa ezincinci
- Yekelela imithetho: Musa ukumkhalimela umntwana wakho ngokudlala kakhulu nangona iTV ivuliwe. Zama umntwana wakho ukuva izandi eziqhelekileyo zendlu. Ukuba ukhwaza kakhulu, mbandakanye nomnye umsebenzi ozolileyo.
- Fumana uncedo: Musa ukuphatha umntwana njengento ekufuneka inyanyekelwe. Nika umntwana omdala imisebenzi emincinci. Thetha izinto ezinje, "Zisa ezo ziwipe, nyana," okanye "Zisa le napkin, ntombi."
- Bekela bucala ixesha elikhethekileyo: Nokuba uxakeke kangakanani na, bekela bucala ubuncinane imizuzu eli-10 ngosuku yokuchitha wedwa nomntwana wakho omdala. Akunyanzelekanga ukuba kube yinto enkulu. Kungaba lula njengokuhlala phantsi naye nidlala imidlalo yeemoto, okanye ukumthengela itshokolethi ayithandayo xa nisiya kuthenga.
- Ngaba unengxaki yokuba lusana kwakhona? Ngamanye amaxesha umntwana wakho omdala uqala ukuziphatha njengosana oluncinci kwakhona. Oku sikubiza ngokuba yi-regression . Umanzisa ibhedi, acele ibhotile, aze acele inabukeni. Ukwenza oko kuba efuna ingqalelo efunyanwa ngumntwana. Musa ukumthethisa ngelo xesha. Musa ukuthi, "Ungumfana omkhulu ngoku." Ukuba uthi ufuna ibhotile okanye inabukeni kangangeentsuku ezimbalwa, myeke. Uninzi lwexesha, emva kokuba ukhulule loo mvakalelo, uya kufuna ukuba "ngumkhuluwa" okanye "ngudadewethu omkhulu" kwakhona.
Masicinge nangezilwanyana zasekhaya?
Ungalibali ngenja okanye ikati yakho xa unesana elitsha. Lutshintsho olukhulu ebomini babo. Ivumba elitsha, izandi ezintsha, umkhwa otshintshileyo... konke oku kutsha kubo. Ngamanye amaxesha izilwanyana zasekhaya zingaqala ukuhlanza, ukwenza izinto ngendlela engafanelekanga, ukuthulula indle endlwini, ukuhlafuna izinto, nokukhwaza ebusuku ngenxa yolu xinzelelo. Izilwanyana aziqondi iimvakalelo ezinzima ezifana "nomona." Zihlala
ziphazamisekile kwaye zididekile . Ngoko ke ukuzohlwaya yeyona nto imbi onokuyenza. Endaweni yoko, ziqhelise eli lungu litsha.
| Ingcebiso | Oko kufuneka ukwenze |
|---|
| Ziqhelanise nezandi ezintsha. | Ngaphambi kokuba umntwana abuye ekhaya, bhala isandi somntwana okhalayo uze usidlale kancinci ukuze isilwanyana siqhele isandi. Nyusa isandi kancinci kancinci. |
| Yeka "intetho yomntwana" | Ukuba ubiza isilwanyana sakho sasekhaya ngokuthi "sithandwa sam esincinci," yeka. Kuba xa ubiza umntwana wakho ngaloo ndlela, isilwanyana sakho sasekhaya sicinga ukuba uthetha naye. |
| Yiqhele ivumba. | Musa ukulungisa igumbi lomntwana ngaxeshanye, yongeza izinto kancinci kancinci uze uvumele isilwanyana sasekhaya sihlole igumbi. |
| Tshintsha indlela oqhele ukwenza ngayo izinto kwangaphambili. | Tshintsha izinto eziza kutshintsha emva kokuba umntwana efikile (umz., ixesha lokuhamba nesilwanyana sasekhaya) kwangethuba uze umqhelise. |
| Ziqhelise ukuchukumisa | Umntwana usenokukhawuleza ukumchukumisa. Ngoko ke, chukumisa iindlebe nomsila wesilwanyana sakho kancinci, uze usinike into entle ngelo xesha, ukuze siqhele olo hlobo lokuchukumisa. |
Ekugqibeleni, konke oku kungokwexeshana. Eli lixesha elincinci lohlengahlengiso esidlula kulo sonke njengentsapho. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, eli xesha linzima liza kuba yinkumbulo nje. Ilungu elitsha liza kuzisa uthando nolonwabo olungakumbi kusapho.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Thetha nomntwana wakho omdala ngomntwana omtsha kwasekuqaleni, ngokunyaniseka nangendlela anokuyiqonda.
- Bandakanya umntwana wakho omdala kumalungiselelo omntwana. Oku kuya kumenza azive ebalulekile.
- Kuqhelekile ukuba umntwana omdala abe nomsindo, abe lusizi, okanye abe nomona ngomntwana wakhe. Musa ukumgxeka ngaloo mvakalelo, kodwa mqonde.
- Nokuba uxakeke kangakanani na, bekela ecaleni ixesha elincinci yonke imihla ukuze uchithe ixesha wedwa nomntwana wakho omdala.
- Ungalibali ukulungiselela izilwanyana zakho zasekhaya ekhaya ukuze zilungele olu tshintsho lutsha.
- Eli lixesha nje lohlengahlengiso lwexeshana. Yiba nomonde nothando. Ukuba unenkxalabo enzulu malunga nokuziphatha komntwana wakho, thetha nogqirha wakho.
Usana lwesibini, umntwana omdala, ukhuphiswano
phakathi kwabazalwana noodadewabo, ukulungiswa komntwana omtsha, umona womntwana, ilungu elitsha losapho,
ukukhulelwa
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