Umsebenzi wasekhaya, umsebenzi wabantwana, umsebenzi weofisi, mhlawumbi ukunyamekela abazali bakho... Phakathi kwako konke oku, ngaba ngamanye amaxesha uziva umthwalo omkhulu kunye noxinzelelo entliziyweni yakho? Ngaba uziva ngathi yonke into iwela phezu kwakho, "Andinakukwenza konke oku"? Enyanisweni kuqhelekile ukuziva ngaloo ndlela. Kuba abafazi abaninzi namhlanje baphila nolu hlobo loxinzelelo. Namhlanje sithetha ngolu xinzelelo lwengqondo wonke umntu athetha ngalo, kodwa akaluqondi ngokwenene, oko kukuthi, uxinzelelo.
Yintoni le ibangela uxinezeleko?
Ngamafutshane, uxinzelelo yinxalenye yobomi bethu. Yinto wonke umntu ayifumanayo. Ngamanye amaxesha olu xinzelelo lulungile. Cinga ngako, ukuba ubhala uviwo, uyafunda kuba uziva uxinezelekile kancinci ngalo. Xa unentetho eofisini, uziva uxinezelekile kancinci, ngoko uzama ukwenza konke okusemandleni akho. Ngaleyo ndlela, uxinzelelo lusinceda soyise imingeni.
Kodwa ingxaki iqala xa olu xinzelelo luqala ukunganyamezeli kwaye luhlala ixesha elide. Ingakumbi njengabafazi, sihlala sicinga ngeemfuno zabanye. Sibeka phambili izinto ezinje ngokondla abantwana, ukunceda amadoda ethu ngemisebenzi yabo yasekhaya, kunye nokunyamekela ikhaya. Ngenxa yesi sizathu, kukho amaxesha apho singaqondi nokuba siphantsi koxinzelelo olungakanani.
Xa olu xinzelelo luqhubeka, oko kukuthi, xa luqhubeka luhlala luhleli , luqala ukuziva luyinxalenye eqhelekileyo yobomi bethu. Sicinga, "Le yindlela ubomi bam obuhlala bunjalo." Kodwa ngokuhamba kwexesha, oku kunokuchaphazela kakhulu umzimba nengqondo yakho.
Ngaba abafazi baziva uxinzelelo ngendlela eyahlukileyo kunamadoda?
Ngoku usenokuba ucinga, "Ingaba ndim lo kuphela? Akwenzeki oku kumadoda?" Enyanisweni, nangona wonke umntu eziva uxinzelelo, kukho umahluko kwindlela abafazi namadoda abajongana ngayo nalo kwaye baluva ngayo. Uphando lwakutshanje lufumanise izinto ezinje:
- Ngokomndilili, kuxelwe ukuba abafazi baxinezelekile kakhulu kunamadoda .
- Abafazi banamathuba amaninzi okucinga ukuba, "Ndingathanda ukuba umntu othile andinike inkxaso yengqondo."
- Abafazi baxhalabela imiba yemali ngaphezu kwamadoda, oko kukuthi, imiba yezoqoqosho.
- Abafazi banamathuba amaninzi kunamadoda okukhankanya uxanduva losapho kunye nobudlelwane bosapho njengezona zinto ziphambili ezibangela uxinzelelo ebomini babo.
Xa kufikwa kwizizathu zoku, izazinzulu zikholelwa ukuba izinto eziphilayo, ezifana neehomoni, zidlala indima. Iimpembelelo zentlalo, ezifana nenkxaso esiyifumanayo kunye nokungabandakanywa kwethu, nazo zinokudlala indima.
Ngaba nawe unazo ezi mpawu? Iimpawu zoxinzelelo
Uxinzelelo yinto echaphazela wonke umntu ngokwahlukileyo. Abanye abantu banokuba neentloko ezibuhlungu, ngelixa abanye benokuba nomsindo. Jonga ukuba unayo na enye yezi mpawu. Masizihlukanise zibe ziindidi ezimbalwa.
| Uhlobo oluneempawu | Izinto onokuziva |
|---|---|
| Iimpawu zomzimba | Iintloko ezibuhlungu rhoqo, ukungalali, ukuqina kwemisipha/iintlungu (ingakumbi entanyeni nasemqolo), ukungabi namdla wokutya okanye ukutya kakhulu, iingxaki zolusu (ezifana ne-acne kunye ne-eczema), ukuziva udiniwe, isisu esibuhlungu, kunye nokuncipha komdla wokwabelana ngesondo. |
| Iimpawu zeemvakalelo | Ukuziva uxhalabile ngalo lonke ixesha, uzive ulusizi, udandathekile, ucaphuka msinya, uzive ungonwabanga, uzive ngathi yonke into ayilawuleki, uzive ulusizi ngequbuliso, unomsindo ngequbuliso, kwaye utshintsha iimvakalelo ngokukhawuleza. |
| Iimpawu zengqondo | Ukulibala yonke into, ukuhlala uxhalabile ngezinto ezingeyomfuneko, ukuba nobunzima bokwenza izigqibo, ukucinga ngendlela engafanelekanga ngayo yonke into, ukungakwazi ukugxila kwinto enye, ukuphelelwa ngumdla wokwenza nantoni na, ukuziva ngathi ubomi abunantsingiselo. |
| Iimpawu zomsebenzi | Ukudinwa kakhulu, iingxaki nabantu emsebenzini, ukungakwazi ukugxila emsebenzini. |
| Iimpawu zentlalo (ezentlalo) | Ukungathethi kakhulu nabanye abantu, ukuzama ukuba wedwa, iingxaki ezihlala zikhona nosapho, kunye nokuziva unesizungu. |
Khumbula, akufuneki ube nazo zonke ezi mpawu. Ukuba uhlangabezana nezinye zazo ixesha elide, isenokuba luphawu oluvela emzimbeni nasengqondweni yakho lokuba uzixelela oku, "Ndincede, andisakwazi ukunyamezela oku."
Kutheni abafazi beziva bexinezelekile kangaka?
Kukho izizathu ezininzi eziqhelekileyo zokuba abafazi babe noxinzelelo.
- Imiba yezoqoqosho (Ezemali)
- Iingxaki zempilo
- Iingxaki zobudlelwane
- Iingxaki emsebenzini okanye esikolweni
Ukongeza kwezi zinto, abafazi abaninzi bathi baziva bexinezelekile kakhulu ngenxa yokunyamekela kunye noxanduva losapho. Cinga ngako, kufuneka unakekele abantwana bakho, kufuneka wenze umsebenzi wabo wesikolo, mhlawumbi kufuneka unakekele abazali bakho abalupheleyo, kufuneka upheke ekhaya, kufuneka ucoce... Ngaba uzicingela wena phakathi kwako konke oku? Rhoqo, siyazilibala size sibalekele ukwanelisa iimfuno zabanye.
Sonke sifuna ukwenza yonke into ngokugqibeleleyo. Sizama ukuba 'ngumama olungileyo', 'umfazi olungileyo', 'intombi elungileyo', 'umqeshwa olungileyo'. Yingakho xa umntu ecela uncedo, kunzima ukuthi "hayi" nokuba asinalo ixesha okanye amandla. Yiyo loo nto sithatha uxanduva olungaphezulu kunokuba sinokukwazi ukuluthwala. Esi sisizathu esikhulu sokwanda koxinzelelo.
Kuza kwenzeka ntoni kwimpilo ukuba olu xinzelelo luyaqhubeka?
Iintsuku ezimbalwa zoxinzelelo zisenokungabangeli monakalo mkhulu. Kodwa njengoko besitshilo ngaphambili, xa oku kuqhubeka, oko kukuthi, kangangeenyanga okanye iminyaka (uxinzelelo olungapheliyo), kunokubangela iingxaki ezinkulu zempilo.
- Iintloko ezibuhlungu nezixhaphakileyo: Ingakumbi iimeko ezifana neentloko ezibuhlungu ezibangelwa kukuxinezeleka kunye nemigraines .
- Isifo sentliziyo: Umngcipheko woxinzelelo lwegazi oluphezulu, isifo sentliziyo , kunye nokuhlaselwa yintliziyo uyanda.
- Iingxaki zamathumbu: Iimeko ezifana ne -Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) , ebangela iimpawu ezifana nentlungu yesisu kunye nokudumba.
- Izifo zengqondo: Iimeko ezifana nokuphazamiseka kovalo , ukuphazamiseka koxinzelelo oluqhelekileyo, kunye nokudakumba okukhulu zinokubakho.
- Intlungu yemisipha: Iintlungu zomzimba, ukuqina kwemisipha okungapheliyo.
- Ukutyeba kakhulu: Uxinzelelo lunokubangela ukuba abanye abantu batye kakhulu, nto leyo enokubangela ukuba batye kakhulu ngokungeyomfuneko.
- Ingozi yestroke .
- Inkqubo yomzimba yokuzikhusela ebuthathaka:Oku kunokubangela izifo ezixhaphakileyo, kwaye xa sele ugula, kungathatha ixesha elide ukuba uphile.
Kodwa ungakhathazeki. Zikho iindlela zokuphepha ezi zinto. Ukuba uthetha nogqirha wakho kwaye ufunde indlela yokulawula uxinzelelo lwakho ngokufanelekileyo, unokuthintela ezi meko zinzima ukuba zenzeke.
Ngoko ke, ungayilawula njani le ngcinezelo?
Eyona sisombululo silungileyo koku kukuzibeka kwindawo yokuqala (ukuzinyamekela). Akuyonto yokuzicingela. Kubalulekile. Kuphela xa uphilile apho unokunyamekela kakuhle usapho lwakho nabanye. Nazi ezinye izinto ezilula onokuzizama.
Izinto onokuzenzela zona
- Tshintsha indlela ocinga ngayo: Endaweni yokuba uzive uxinezelekile yingcinga ethi "Ndimele ndenze oku," zama ukucinga ngendlela eyakhayo, "Ndinethuba lokwenza oku." Nokuba yinto encinci inokwenza umahluko.
- Yitya ukutya okunesondlo: Faka imifuno, iziqhamo, iimbotyi kunye neentlanzi ezininzi ekutyeni kwakho. Nciphisa ukutya okwenziweyo okuneswekile kangangoko unako.
- Chitha ixesha elithile nendalo: Hambahamba ebaleni ubuncinane imizuzu eli-10-15 ngosuku. Jonga umthi okanye igqabi. Phumla ungasebenzi kwifowuni yakho nakwiTV okwethutyana.
- Ukuzilolonga: Yenza into efana nokuhamba okanye ukubaleka ude ubile ubuncinane imizuzu engama-30 ngosuku. Ukuzilolonga lolona nyango lulungileyo lomzimba kunye nengqondo.
- Lala kakuhle: Zama ukulala iiyure eziyi-7-9 ngaphandle kokuphazanyiswa ngosuku. Yeka ukujonga ifowuni yakho okanye ukubukela iTV ngaphambi kokuba ulale.
- Yenza izinto ezizolisa ingqondo: Izinto ezifana neyoga, ukucamngca , kunye nokuzilolonga ngokucothayo nangokunzulu kunokubonelela ngokukhululeka okukhulu engqondweni.
- Zinike ixesha lokwenza into oyithandayo: Zibekele ixesha elincinci yonke imihla lokwenza into oyithandayo, njengokufunda incwadi, ukumamela ingoma, ukuzoba umfanekiso, okanye ukutyala intyatyambo emyezweni.
- Thetha nomntu omthembayo: Ukuthetha ngeemvakalelo zakho nomntu ofana nomyeni wakho, umhlobo osenyongweni, umama, okanye udadewenu kunokukunceda unciphise umthwalo engqondweni yakho.
- Gcina idayari: Ukubhala phantsi iimvakalelo zakho neengcinga zakho imini yonke encwadini kunokukunceda ukhulule ingqondo yakho.
Iingcebiso ezingakumbi zempilo-ntle yakho yengqondo
- Fumanisa ukuba yintoni ekubangela uxinezeleko: Bhala phantsi yonke into oyivayo noyenzayo imini yonke. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, uza kufunda ukuba zeziphi izinto ezikwenza uxinezeleke kakhulu. Emva koko ungenza isicwangciso sokuphepha okanye sokujongana nezo zinto.
- Ziqhelise ukuthi 'hayi': Musa ukuthi 'ewe' kuyo yonke into. Ukuba kukho into ongenakukwazi ukuyenza, yilahle ngothando nangembeko. Yazi imida yakho.
- Xa ucaphukile, bala ukuya kwi-10:Ukuba unomsindo ngento ethile, ngaphambi kokuba uphendule ngoko nangoko, buyela umva ubale uye kwi-10. Tsala umoya onzulu. Elo xesha lincinci linokwenza umahluko omkhulu.
- Ziphathe ngendlela oziphatha ngayo kwabanye:
- Phumla kwi-social media: Ukuba sefowunini rhoqo nokujonga ubomi babanye abantu nako kunokubangela uxinezeleko. Ziqhelise ukuyibeka kude ifowuni yakho ubuncinane iyure enye okanye ezimbini ngosuku.
- Cela uncedo: Ukuba usasokola ukumelana noxinzelelo wedwa, ungoyiki okanye ube neentloni ukucela uncedo. Ngokuqinisekileyo bonana nogqirha wakho uze uthethe naye. Uya kukwazi ukukunceda. Ungathunyelwa nonyango . Oko kuya kukunika amandla amaninzi okudlula koku.
- Kuqhelekile ukuba abafazi bazive bexinezelekile, kodwa akulunganga kwimpilo yabo ukuba oko kuyaqhubeka.
- Lumka ngeempawu ezifana nentloko ebuhlungu, ukungakwazi ukulala, ukucaphuka, kunye nokulibala.
- Ziqhelise ukuthi 'hayi'. Musa ukuzithwalela lonke uxanduva. Yazi imida yakho.
- Ukuzilolonga, ukulala kakuhle, ukutya okunesondlo, kunye nokuzinika ixesha lokwenza into oyithandayo kubaluleke kakhulu.
- Ukuba unengxaki yokulawula ezi zinto wedwa, ungoyiki ukucela uncedo. Thetha nogqirha wakho ngale nto.
Khumbula, nokuba ukwinqwelo-moya, bathi nxiba imaski yakho yeoksijini kuqala xa kuthe kwenzeka ingozi, uze uncede abanye. Ngokufanayo, ungabanyamekela abanye kuphela xa uphilile. Yiba nobubele kuwe.
Uxinzelelo lufana nomthwalo onzima ukuwuthwala. Ingakumbi njengabafazi, sithwala abantu abangaphezu komnye. Ngoko ke ukucela uncedo akubonisi ubuthathaka, luphawu lwamandla. Umzimba nengqondo yakho zombini zixabisekile. Ngoko ke zinyamekele zombini.
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