Sivame ukukhuluma ngobuhlakani, akunjalo? Uma umuntu efunda kahle futhi ephumelela izivivinyo, sithi, "O, unengqondo enhle." Kodwa bewazi ukuthi ukuze uphumelele futhi ujabule kuleli zwe, ukuba ne-IQ ephezulu kuphela akwanele? Kukhona olunye uhlobo olukhethekile lobuhlakani—Ubuhlakani Bemizwa, noma lokho esivame ukukubiza ngokuthi i-EQ .
Ingabe Ubuhlakani Bumayelana Ne-IQ Kuphela?
Kungenzeka ukuthi uke wezwa abantu bethi, "O, angidingi ukufunda kakhulu; i-IQ yami iphezulu kakhulu." I-IQ imele i-Intellectual Quotient . Iyisilinganiso esisetshenziselwa ukukala izinto ezifana nekhono lomuntu lokufunda kanye nokucabanga okunengqondo. Ingabikezela, ngezinga elithile, ukuthi umuntu angenza kahle kangakanani esikoleni noma eyunivesithi.
Kodwa-ke, i-IQ akuyona yodwa indlela yokulinganisa amandla ethu. Cabanga ngokuthi zingaki ezinye iziphiwo ezikhona kuleli zwe:
- Abanye abantu banesiphiwo esikhulu ekuhlakanipheni kwendawo —njengabakhi bezakhiwo nabaculi ababona umhlaba ngezindlela ezintathu.
- Abanye banobuhlakani bomculo , banekhono langaphakathi lokubona isigqi, ithoni, kanye nephimbo.
- Kukhona futhi amakhono ezemidlalo, ezobuciko, kanye nezobuchwepheshe... konke lokhu kuyizinhlobo ezahlukene zobuhlakani.
Phakathi kwalokhu, kukhona okunye ukuhlakanipha okukhethekile okubalulekile empilweni yethu, kodwa ngezinye izikhathi okunganakwa: Ukuhlakanipha Kwemizwa (EQ) .
Kuyini Ngempela Ukuhlakanipha Kwemizwa (EQ)?
Kalula nje, i-Emotional Intelligence yikhono lakho lokuqonda, ukusebenzisa, nokuphatha imizwa yakho . Abanye bayibiza ngokuthi i-EQ (Emotional Quotient), kanti abanye bayibiza ngokuthi i-EI (Emotional Intelligence). Njengoba nje umuntu one-IQ ephezulu engase athole amamaki aphezulu ezivivinyweni, umuntu one-EQ ephezulu uvame ukuthola impumelelo enkulu ekuxhumaneni nabantu nasezimweni ezikhungathekisayo ngokomzwelo.
Cabanga ngokuba ne-EQ ephezulu njengokuthi "unesiphiwo sokuqonda nokuxhumana nabantu." Uma ukwazi ukuqonda abantu okhuluma nabo futhi osebenza nabo, kukusiza uphumelele kuzo zonke izici zokuphila. Eqinisweni, ezinye izifundo zibonisa ukuthi ekusebenzeni kahle esikoleni kanye nempumelelo yobungcweti, i-EQ ngezinye izikhathi ingaba yinto ebaluleke kakhulu kune-IQ.
Unabangane abaningi abahle? Kulula yini ngawe ukuqonda izinkinga zabanye? Ungakwazi yini ukulawula intukuthelo yakho? Konke lokhu kuhlobene ne -EQ yakho.
Abanye abantu ngokwemvelo banesiphiwo se-EQ ephezulu. Kodwa kwabanye, la makhono angafundwa futhi asetshenziswe. Izindaba ezinhle kakhulu ukuthi wonke umuntu angathuthuka! Ngokungafani ne-IQ, i-EQ yinto ongayakha ngomzamo nokuzijwayeza. Kodwa-ke, udinga ukwazi ukuthi ungayenza kanjani, akunjalo?
Uyithuthukisa Kanjani Ingqondo Yakho Yokukhalipha Kwemizwa (EQ)?
Ubuhlakani Bemizwa abuyona into eyodwa nje; buyinhlanganisela yamakhono amaningana. Ake sihlole ukuthi ayini nokuthi singawathuthukisa kanjani.
1. Qaphela Imizwa Yakho
Sonke sibhekana nemizwa eminingi phakathi nosuku. Eminye (njengokumangala) iyanyamalala ngemizuzwana, kanti eminye (njengenjabulo noma usizi) ihlala isikhathi eside futhi ibumba isimo sethu sengqondo. Ukuhlonza le mizwa nokuyinika igama kuyikhono eliyisisekelo le-EQ.
Ukuzazi—ukuma kancane ucabange, “O, ngizizwa ngale ndlela njengamanje”—kukusiza ukuthi ulawule imizwa yakho. Kukusiza futhi ukuthi uzwelane nendlela abanye abangase bazizwe ngayo.
Abanye abantu badlula usuku lwabo lonke bengaqapheli ukuthi bazizwa kanjani. Zama ukuthola imizwa yakho njengoba yenzeka. Zinike igama engqondweni (isib., "Ngizizwa ngibonga kakhulu njengamanje," noma "Ngizizwa ngikhungathekile kakhulu"). Yenza lokhu kube umkhuba wansuku zonke. Ngokuhamba kwesikhathi, uzobona ukuthi usuqaphele kangakanani isimo sakho semizwa.
2. Zama Ukuqonda Abanye (Uzwela)
Njengabantu, sixhumene. Enye ingxenye ebalulekile ye-EQ yikhono lokuqonda ukuthi abanye bangase bazizwe kanjani esimweni esithile.nokuthi kungani bezizwa ngaleyo ndlela.
Ngisho noma singazi kahle ukuthi umuntu ubhekene nani, ikhono lokucabanga ukuthi, "O, kumelwe ukuthi bazizwa ngale ndlela njengamanje," libizwa ngokuthi Uzwela . Uzwela lusisiza ukuba sikhathalele abanye futhi sakhe ubudlelwano obuqinile. Lusiqondisa ukuthi senze kanjani noma ukuthi sithini lapho othile ebhekene nobunzima.
Cabanga ngomngane odabukile ngoba ehlulekile ukuhlolwa. Ungase ungazizwa udabukile ngokuphelele, kodwa uma ucabanga ukuthi, "Bengingazizwa kanjani ukube bengisesimweni sakhe?" bese unikeza izwi eliduduzayo, yileyo ndlela osebenza ngayo.
3. Lawula Imizwa Yakho Futhi Uphendule Ngokufanele
Sonke siyathukuthela futhi sicasuke. Kubalulekile ukuveza imizwa yakho, kodwa ukulawula impendulo yakho kusho ukwazi ukuthi uzoyiveza nini, kuphi, nokuthi kanjani imizwa yakho.
Uma uqonda imizwa yakho, ungasebenzisa ukuzithiba ukuze ubambe ukusabela okusheshayo uma isikhathi noma indawo kungafanele. Umuntu one-EQ ephezulu uyazi ukuthi ukusabela ngokuphamazela, ngobudlova, noma ngokungahloniphi kungalimaza ubudlelwano.
Isibonelo, uma uthukuthelela umphathi wakho emsebenzini, kulungile yini ukumemeza nokuvala umnyango? Noma kungcono ukuthatha isikhashana, uvumele intukuthelo yehle, bese uxoxa ngodaba ngokuthula? Umuntu one-EQ ephezulu ukhetha inketho yesibili. Uyaqonda ukuthi ukulawula imizwa nokuphendula ngendlela efanele kubalulekile. Lokhu kusiza futhi ukunciphisa ukucindezeleka futhi kungakuvikela nasezinkingeni zempilo yomzimba njengomfutho wegazi ophakeme.
4. Khetha Isimo Sakho Sengqondo
Enye ingxenye yokulawula imizwa ukukhetha imizwa yakho. Imizwa iyizimo zemizwa ezihlala isikhathi eside. Sinamandla okunquma ukuthi yisiphi isimo sengqondo esifanele isimo bese singena kuso. Ukukhetha imizwa efanele kukusiza ukuthi uhlale ukhuthazekile, ugxile, noma uqine esikhundleni sokuyeka.
Abantu abane-EQ ephezulu bayazi ukuthi imizwa ayizona nje izinto "ezenzekayo" kithi. Ngokuqonda ukuthi yisiphi isimo sengqondo esilungele isimo esithile nokwazi ukuthi singashintshela kanjani kuso, singakwazi ukulawula. Cabanga ngesethulo esibalulekile onaso. Ungase uzizwe ukhathazekile kusengaphambili. Kodwa uma ungakha ngamabomu umuzwa wokukholelwa ngokuthi, "Cha, ngizokwenza lokhu kahle, ngingakwenza," bese ushintshela esimweni sengqondo sokuzethemba nesomdlandla—lokho nakho kuyingxenye ye-EQ.
I-EQ yinto oyakhayo ngokuhamba kwesikhathi
Ubuhlakani Bemizwa bukhula njengoba sikhula. Ukube bekungenjalo, wonke umuntu omdala ubezoziphatha njengomntwana omncane—ememeza, ekhala, futhi ethukuthele ngaphandle kokulawulwa ngokomzwelo.
Amanye amakhono e-EQ athuthuka ngaphambi kwamanye. Isibonelo, uma usuwazi ukuthi yini okufanele uyinake, kuba lula ukubona imizwa. Kodwa-ke, amakhono afana nokulawula ukusabela kwakho noma ukukhetha imizwa yakho kungabonakala kunzima ukuwaqonda. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi ingxenye yobuchopho bethu ephethe ukuzilawula iyaqhubeka nokuvuthwa phakathi neminyaka yethu yobusha. Kodwa-ke, ngokuzijwayeza, lezo zindlela zobuchopho ziyaqina.
Njengoba nje ihlumela elincane likhula libe umuthi omkhulu, i-EQ yethu ikhula ngesikhathi, ulwazi kanye nomzamo.
Sonke singaqinisa i-EQ yethu ngokuqaphela imizwa yethu, ukuqonda ukuthi kungani sizizwa ngendlela ethile, ukuzwelana nabanye, nokuveza imizwa yethu ngezindlela ezinempilo. Lokhu ngeke kwenzeke ngobusuku obubodwa, kodwa uhambo olufanele ukulithatha.
Isifinyezo kanye Nezinto Ezibalulekile Okufanele Uzicabangele
Ngakho-ke, nanka amaphuzu ayinhloko okufanele uwakhumbule engxoxweni yanamuhla:
- Kokubili i-IQ ne-EQ kubalulekile empilweni: Ubuhlakani Bemizwa yikhono lokuqonda nokuphatha imizwa yakho nokuqonda abanye.
- I-EQ ingathuthukiswa: Ngokungafani ne-IQ, i-EQ yinto ongayithuthukisa ngomzamo oqhubekayo.
- Zijwayeze le mikhuba ukuze uthuthukise i-EQ yakho:
- Qaphela imizwa yakho.
- Zama ukuqonda imizwa yabanye (Uzwela).
- Lawula imizwa yakho bese uphendula ngokucabangela.
- Khetha isimo sakho sengqondo ngamabomu.
- I-EQ ikhula ngokuhamba kwesikhathi: Kudinga isikhathi nokuzijwayeza. Ungesabi ukuthatha isinyathelo ngasinye.
Khumbula, ukuthuthukisa ubuhlakani bakho bemizwa akugcini nje ngokukusiza ukuthi uphile impilo ejabulisayo nephumelelayo—futhi kusekela impilo yakho yengqondo futhi kuqinise ukuxhumana kwakho nabanye. Ingabe kufanele siqale ukugxila kulokhu namuhla?
Ubuhlakani Bemizwa, i-EQ, i-EI, Ubuhlakani, Imizwa, Impilo Yengqondo, Ubudlelwano, Ukuzithiba, Uzwela, iNirogi Lanka
