yu pikin geht prohblem wit 'klik' na skul? Lɛ wi tɔk bɔt dis!

Fɔ mek padi na skul, fɔ de togɛda ɛn fɔ ɛnjɔy wit dɛn padi dɛn de rili impɔtant fɔ pikin dɛn frɔm we dɛn yɔŋ. Bɔt sɔmtɛm dɛn grup ya fɔ padi, ɔ wetin wi kɔl ‘sɛt’, kin bigin fɔ biev difrɛn smɔl. Sɔm pikin dɛn ‘in’, sɔm ‘ɔt’, ɛn dɛn kin jɔs bisin bɔt dɛn ‘status’. Bikɔs ɔf dɛn ‘klik’ ya, i kin rili at fɔ mek pikin dɛn dil wit skul padi dɛn ɛn du skul wok, mɔ fɔ skul pikin dɛn we ol midul ej. Bɔt nɔ wɔri, as mama ɔ papa, bɔku tin dɛn de we yu kin du fɔ ɛp yu pikin dis tɛm.

Wetin na ‘klik’? Aw i difrɛn frɔm wan grup we wi kin gɛt padi dɛn ɔltɛm?

Bɔku tɛm, natin nɔ bad fɔ gɛt grup fɔ padi dɛn. I de mek pikin dɛn ebul fɔ spɛn tɛm wit dɛnsɛf, ple, ɛn stɔdi. Bɔt ‘klik’ kin kɔmplikt smɔl pas dat. Fɔ tɔk am simpul wan, ‘klik’ gɛt lɔ bɔt udat de ‘in’ ɛn udat ‘ɔt’. Dɛn kin tink mɔ bɔt di ‘status’ we dɛn grup gɛt. Dɛn gɛt abit lɛk ‘wi na di bɛst’ ɛn ‘ɔda pipul dɛn nɔ gud lɛk wi’. Dis na di rizin we mek ‘klik’ difrɛn frɔm nɔmal grup fɔ padi dɛn ɛn dɛn kin mek prɔblɛm to pikin dɛn.

Yu pikin de sɔfa wit ‘klik’? Aw yu no?

Sɔm pikin dɛn de na wan grup. Ɔda wan dɛn dɔn kɔmɔt. Sɔm pikin dɛn kin de insay tide ɛn kɔmɔt tumara. If i tan lɛk se yu pikin sɔri wantɛm wantɛm, ɔ if pikin we rili lɛk fɔ de wit ɔda pipul dɛn kin spɛn tɛm in wan wantɛm wantɛm, yu nid fɔ chɛk. Aks am bɔt am. I kin bi bikɔs ɔf wan grup we de na skul.

If yu pikin de marginalized by ‘clique’, aw yu as mama ɔ papa go ɛp?

We pikin de gɛt prɔblɛm lɛk dis, dɛn nid yu sɔpɔt. Si if yu ebul fɔ du dɛn tin ya.

Tɔk bɔt yu ɛkspiriɛns dɛn.

If yu bin dɔn gɛt dɛn kayn tin dɛn ya we yu bin de na skul, tɔk to yu pikin bɔt dat. Klik nɔto sɔntin we dɔn apin dis biɛn tɛm, dɛn dɔn de fɔ lɔng tɛm! We yu pikin yɛri yu stori, dɛn go no se nɔto dɛn wangren de go tru dis. Dis go gi dɛn bɔku trɛnk. Dɛn kin tink se , "If dis dɔn apin to mama/papa bak, dis fɔ bi nɔmal tin."

Ɛksplen to yu pikin wetin ‘rijekshɔn’ min.

Ɛp yu pikin fɔ ɔndastand di pen we i kin fil we pɔsin de avɔyd am ɔ nɔ gri fɔ tek am. Na di sem tɛm, mɛmba dɛn se sɔntɛnde wisɛf kin vɛks pan wi mama ɛn papa, wi padi dɛn, ɛn brɔda ɛn sista dɛn. Bɔt tich dɛn bak aw da vɛks de kin dɔn kwik kwik wan. Dat min se, ɛp yu pikin fɔ ɔndastand se fɔ rijek ɛn shun nɔto fɔ ɔltɛm, i kin chenj . Tɛl dɛn se di padi we de avɔyd dɛn tide kin tɔk to dɛn bak tumara.

Tɔk bɔt padi biznɛs we gɛt wɛlbɔdi ɛn padi biznɛs we nɔ fayn.

Ɛksplen to yu pikin wetin na padi biznɛs we gɛt wɛlbɔdi ɛn wetin na padi we nɔ gɛt wɛlbɔdi. Tich dɛn aw fɔ no wan say, ɔ lay lay padi biznɛs. Tɛl dɛn se sɔntɛnde pipul dɛn kin jɔj ɔda pipul dɛn bay di we aw dɛn luk, di we aw dɛn de biev, ɛn di we aw dɛn de drɛs. Bɔt, ɛksplen se pipul dɛn we de trit ɔda pipul dɛn bad ɛn put dɛn dɔŋ kin du dat bikɔs dɛn nɔ gɛt kɔnfidɛns pan dɛnsɛf ɛn dɛn kin tray fɔ kɔntrol ɔda pipul dɛn fɔ kɔba am.

Klik lida dɛn kin rili nɔ sef.

Tink bɔt am, di pɔsin we na di lida fɔ di ‘klik’ kin bisin mɔ fɔ mek pipul dɛn lɛk am ɛn ɔda pipul dɛn kin gri wit am pas di pikin we dɛn dɔn pul kɔmɔt. Wetin dɛn rili fil nɔto wetin dɛn de sho. Pipul dɛn lɛk dis kin rili nɔ sef. So tɛl yu pikin se i nɔ fɔ jɔj pipul dɛn bay aw dɛn de luk.

Fɛn stori ɛn fim dɛn we yu pikin go ebul fɔ rilayt to.

Bɔku buk dɛn, TV sho dɛn, ɛn fim dɛn kin gɛt pipul dɛn we kin win dɛn kayn pipul dɛn ya we dɛn nɔ kin gri wit dɛn ɛn leta dɛn kin win. Dɛn stori ya de tich wan pawaful mɛsej bɔt di valyu fɔ bi tru to yusɛf ɛn di impɔtant tin fɔ bi gud padi. Fɔ ɛgzampul, buk dɛm lɛk "Blubber" we Judy Blume rayt de sho yɔŋ pikin dɛm aw "klik" kin chenj kwik kwik wan. Big pikin ɛn yɔŋ pipul dɛn kin gɛt fɔ du wit fim dɛn lɛk "Mean Girls," "Angus," "The Breakfast Club," ɛn "Clueless."

Fokus pan di tin dɛn we yu kin du we nɔ de na di skul

If yu pikin nɔ de du dɛn kayn tin ya yet, mek i put an pan tin dɛn we nɔ de na di skul. Sɔm ɛgzampul dɛn na art klas, spɔt, martial arts, langwej lanin, ɔ volontia. Dɛn tin ya de gi yu pikin di chans fɔ bil nyu soshal grup ɛn fɔ gɛt nyu skil dɛn. Dis go ɛp dɛn fɔ gɛt sɛns fɔ bi pat pan dɛn ɛn gladi at ausayd di skul grup.

Yu pikin sidɔm na ‘klik’ ɛn buli ɔda pipul dɛn? If na so i bi, wetin yu fɔ du?

Sɔntɛnde, yu pikin kin bi di wan we sidɔm na ‘klik’ ɛn pul ɔda pikin dɛn kɔmɔt, de mek dɛn laf dɛn, ɛn buli dɛn. If yu si sɔntin lɛk dat , yu nid fɔ tɔk to yu pikin bɔt am wantɛm wantɛm. Naw, frɔm talɛnt sho to rialiti sho na TV, dɛn de sho rud rud bihayvya ɛn ala pan ɔda pipul dɛn as big tin, so fɔ tich pikin dɛn tin dɛn lɛk fɔ du gud, rɛspɛkt, ɛn sɔri-at dɔn bi big prɔblɛm fɔ famili dɛn.

Tɔk bɔt ‘pawa’ ɛn ‘kɔntrol’ na padi biznɛs.

Tɔk to yu pikin bɔt aw pawa ɛn kɔntrol de wok na padi biznɛs. Tray fɔ ɔndastand wetin mek dɛn fil se dɛn nid fɔ de na wan grup, ɛn wetin na di rizin dɛn fɔ dat. Tɔk opin wan bɔt udat de na di klik, udat de na do, ɛn wetin kin apin to di pikin dɛn we de na do (i.e. dɛn nɔ de tek dɛn, marginalized, ɔ buli?). Mɛmba yu pikin se fɔ spɛn tɛm wit sɔm padi dɛn difrɛn frɔm fɔ mek ɔda pipul dɛn nɔ de wit am bay wilful .

Aks di pikin if dɛn proud fɔ di we aw dɛn de biev.

Aks yu pikin if i proud fɔ di we aw i de biev na skul, ɛn ɛnkɔrej am fɔ tink bɔt dat. Yu kin aks kwɛstyɔn dɛn lɛk, "Yu rili ɛnjɔy am we yu de biev da we de?" "Aw yu go fil if ɔda pikin du yu dat?"

Apat frɔm dat, aks ticha dɛn, gaydman dɛn, ɔ ɔda skul ɔfisa dɛn fɔ wetin dɛn tink bɔt wetin de apin insay ɛn ausayd di klasrum. Dɛn kin aks bak if di skul gɛt ɛni program fɔ ɛp fɔ manej grup dɛn ɛn ɛp studɛnt dɛn we gɛt difrɛn opinion fɔ wok togɛda.

Aw yu go ɛp yu pikin fɔ gɛt gud padi biznɛs?

Yu kin ɛp yu pikin dɛn fɔ gɛt wɛlbɔdi padi biznɛs ɛn nɔ fɔ tu kech pan ‘klik’ bay we yu gi dɛn dɛn advays ya:

Fain wetin 'wok', no jos 'fit in'.

Aks yu pikin fɔ tink bɔt wetin i valyu, wetin i lɛk, ɛn if dɛn tin dɛn de fit di grup we i de.Ask kwɛstyɔn dɛn lɛk:

• ‘Wetin na di men rizin we mek yu want fɔ de na dis tim?’
• ‘Us kayn kɔmprɔmis yu go gɛt fɔ mek fɔ de na dis tim? Yu tink se dɛn sakrifays dɛn de fayn?’
• ‘Wetin yu go du if di lida fɔ di grup tɛl yu fɔ trit di ɔda pikin dɛn bad, ɔ tɛl yu fɔ du sɔntin we yu nɔ want fɔ du?’
• ‘Wetin difrɛn bitwin fɔ provok ɛn buli, jɔs fɔ provok, ɛn fɔ provok di we we go mek ɔda pipul dɛn fil bad?’

Tɛl dɛn se dɛn nɔ fɔ giv ɔp pan di tin dɛn we dɛn lɛk.

Imajin yu pikin bin ɔlwayz want fɔ ple di piano, bɔt wantɛm wantɛm i disayd se i "nɔ kul" ɛn i want fɔ giv am. Tɔk to yu pikin bɔt am ɛn ɛp am fɔ fɛn sɔlv. Ɛnkɔrej dɛn fɔ tek pat pan tin dɛn we dɛn kin ɛnjɔy fɔ du ɛn we go mek dɛn gɛt kɔnfidɛns pan dɛnsɛf.

Ɛnkɔrej difrɛn padi dɛn

Ɛnkɔrej yu pikin fɔ mek padi dɛn we kɔmɔt na difrɛn say dɛn, difrɛn say dɛn, difrɛn ej, ɛn tin dɛn we i lɛk, we i lɛk ɛn we i lɛk fɔ de wit. Bi ɛgzampul fɔ yu pikin bay we yu mek bɔku padi ɛn pipul dɛn we yu sabi, we gɛt difrɛn ej ɛn kayn pipul dɛn. Tɛl dɛn se dɛn kin lan bɔku tin na layf bay we dɛn de tɔk to difrɛn pipul dɛn pas fɔ jɔs de wit di sem kayn pipul dɛn.

Tink bɔt di ‘kwaliti’ fɔ padi biznɛs, nɔto di ‘status’.

Fɔ wɔri tumɔs bɔt if yu pikin dɛn na padi wit di ‘rayt’ pipul dɛn ɛn na di ‘rayt’ grup dɛn kin mek dɛn wɔri bɔt ‘status’. Bifo dat , pe atɛnshɔn pan gud padi biznɛs we gɛt kwaliti. Ɛp yu pikin fɔ ɔndastand se ilɛksɛf i gɛt smɔl padi dɛn, dɛn stil na gud pipul dɛn we pɔsin kin abop pan.

Tich dɛn fɔ tɔk agens di bad tin dɛn we dɛn de du ɛn tinap fɔ ɔda pipul dɛn.

If yu pikin de fil se i de fred ɔ de prɛs am bikɔs ɔf wetin de apin na ‘kliki’, ɛnkɔrej am fɔ tinap fɔ dɛnsɛf ɛn ɔda pipul dɛn we dɛn de marginalize ɔ buli. Tɛl dɛn nɔ fɔ tek pat pan ɛnitin we dɛn tink se nɔ rayt. I nɔ mata if na jɔs jok ɔ fɔ tɔk bad bɔt ɔda pipul dɛn.

Tɛl dɛn fɔ tek rispɔnsibiliti fɔ wetin dɛn de du

Ɛnkɔrej yu pikin fɔ bisin bɔt ɔda pipul dɛn ɛn nɔ gri wit ɔltin jɔs bikɔs di grup se am. Mɛmba yu pikin se tru tru padi go rɛspɛkt wetin yu tink, wetin yu lɛk, ɛn wetin yu disayd fɔ du, ilɛksɛf dɛn difrɛn. Sɔntɛnde, i kin tranga fɔ mek yu difrɛn frɔm di krawd, bɔt te go, tich yu pikin se na in gɛt fɔ du wit wetin i de tɔk ɛn du.

Di tin dɛn we impɔtant pas ɔl fɔ mɛmba (Take-Home Message) .

We wi luk wetin wi dɔn de tɔk bɔt, fɔ dil wit grup dɛn kin at sɔntɛnde. Bɔt mɛmba se dɛn tin ya kin chenj kwik kwik wan. Di klik we yu gɛt tide kin dɔn tumara. Wetin impɔtant pas ɔl na fɔ mek rial padi dɛn – pipul dɛn we yu kin tɔk to, laf wit, ɛn tɛl yu yu kɔnfidɛns to.

Di rial sikrit fɔ bi pɔsin we rili ‘pɔpul’ na fɔ tray fɔ bi di kayn padi we yu want fɔ bi: pɔsin we gɛt rɛspɛkt, we de du tin tret, we de sɔpɔt yu, we gud, we pɔsin kin abop pan, ɛn we gud. Dat na di lɛsin we gɛt valyu pas ɔl fɔ tich yu pikin.

` Skul padi dɛm, klik dɛm, grup dɛm, marginalization, buli, wɛlbɔdi padi biznɛs, mama ɛn papa sɔpɔt