Ina pai tetahi ki a koe, i mōhio koe ka pai pea rātou ki a koe me te kore koe e mōhio?

I haere mai a Tharindu (23 tau te pakeke) ki te whare hauora i taua rā, he tino mā, ā, he iti noa te ataata i tōna mata. I a ia e ruru ana i tōna māhunga, he paku whakama, ka pātai mai ia i tētahi pātai whaiaro ki ahau.

"E Tākuta Priya, he iti nei taku raruraru ki tōku hinengaro. I kōrero mai tētahi kōtiro nō tō mātou whare wānanga inanahi e pai ana ia ki ahau. Kāore au i tino whakaaro ki a ia i mua. Engari mai i te wā i mōhio ai au e pai ana ia ki ahau, kua whakaaro tonu ahau ki a ia, ā, e ahua ana kua tīmata taku hiahia ki a ia. He he kei tōku roro, e tākuta, he mea hinengaro rānei tēnei?" i pātai a Tharindu me te tino hiahia.

I menemene ahau, ā, ka mea atu ki a Tharindu, "E Tharindu, kaua e manukanuka. Kāore he he o tō roro. He ariā hinengaro rongonui tēnei e kitea whānuitia ana e te tangata puta noa i te ao. Ka kiia tēnei ko te Pānga Pai Tauutuutu . Nō reira, i tēnei rā, me kōrero tātou mō te wā e mōhio ana tātou kei te pai tetahi ki a tātou, ka kukume pōhēhētia tātou ki taua tangata."

He aha te Pānga o te Pai Tauutuutu?

E mea ana te ariā manakohanga tauutuutu, ina rongo tātou kei te aro mai tetahi ki a tātou, ka aro noa tātou ki taua tangata.

E ai ki te hinengaro pāpori, e mōhiotia ana tēnei ko tētahi o ngā āhuatanga pono me te kaha rawa atu e awe ana i te tīmatanga o ngā whanaungatanga tangata.

He pēhea te urupare a tō tātou roro ki tēnei? (Te Pūtaiao Roro o te Āhuatanga)

Ina mōhio tātou kei te whakaatu mai tetahi i te aroha, i te atawhai rānei ki a tātou, ka puta ētahi huringa matū i roto i tō tātou roro:

1. Dopamine (te homoni harikoa): Ina kī mai tetahi e pai ana ia ki a tātou, ka homai he tino ngākau māhaki me te uara ki a tātou. E whakaaro ana te roro he utu tēnei, ā, ka tukuna te homoni dopamine.
2. Oxytocin (homoni here): Ka āwhina tēnei homoni ki te waihanga i te wairua haumaru me te piripono ki ētahi atu.
3. Ngā Neuron Whakaata: Ko te mahi a ēnei pūtau io motuhake i roto i te roro he tārua i roto i ō tātou hinengaro i ngā kare ā-roto o te aroha me te atawhai e whakakitea mai ana e ētahi atu ki a tātou.

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Te Whakakorenga Hinengaro

Ina kī mai tetahi e pai ana ia ki a tātou, ka pātai aunoa mai tō tātou hinengaro huna: "He aha ia i pai ai ki ahau?"

Ka whakamatautauria ō tātou roro ki te rapu whakautu mō tēnei, ā, nā reira, ka tīmata tātou ki te aro nui atu ki ngā āhuatanga pai o taua tangata, pērā i te atawhai, te ataata ataahua, me te whakakatakata. Nō reira, ka whanake hoki te aroha o ō tātou ngākau ki a rātou.

Te Porowhita Urupare Pai

Ko te aroha me te kukume he pūngao e rere ana i ngā taha e rua:

• Ka whakakitea e te tangata kē tō aroha → kei te kite koe i tō uara → e pai ana koe ki a rātou → ka nui ake tō rātou aroha.

Mā tēnei huringa tonu ka taea e te hononga i waenganui i te tokorua te tipu kaha ake i roto i te wā poto rawa.

🚨 Ngā Tohu Whero hei Tūpato mō te Hononga

Ahakoa ka hiahia pea tātou ki tētahi nā te mea he rite tonu ō tātou hiahia ki tētahi, me mōhio tātou ki ngā tohu mōrearea e whai ake nei i mua i te urunga ki tētahi whanaungatanga hou:

• Te Whakapōrearea i te Aroha: Te hoatu koha nui rawa, ngā mihi, me ngā ngana ki te whakatata rawa i te tīmatanga o te whanaungatanga (he rautaki pea tēnei hei whakahaere i a koe ā muri ake nei - te tinihanga).
• Te Whakahaerenga ā-Kare ā-roto: Ki te ngana tetahi ki te whakatutuki i ōna hiahia mā te whakahaere i a koe ā-roto me te whakaari kei te pai ia ki a koe.
• Kāore e mārama ki ngā rohe: Mena ka pēhia koe kia mahi i tā rātou e hiahia ai me te kore e whakaute i tō ake herekoretanga, ō whakaaro, me ō rohe.

Ngā Mea Me Mahi, Ngā Mea Kaua e Mahi