Ese uhangayikishijwe n'umwana wawe w'ingimbi? Reka tuvuge ku bijyanye no kwiyahura kw'ingimbi.

Ndabizi ko iyi ari ingingo igoye kandi ikomeye kuyivugaho. Ariko se, si byiza ko tutavuga ku kintu nk'iki gifitanye isano n'ubuzima bw'abana bacu bato? Kwiyahura ni igihe umuntu yiyahuye. Akenshi, biterwa no kwiheba gukabije, gucika intege, cyangwa kunanirwa kubona igisubizo cy'ikibazo kidakemuka. Kubura umwana muto muri ubu buryo ni ububabare bukabije ku muryango, inshuti, ndetse na sosiyete yose.

Kuki abana bacu bato bakururwa n'ibintu nk'ibyo?

Mu by’ukuri, impamvu zituma umuntu ukiri muto yiyahura ziragoye cyane. Biragoye kuvuga impamvu imwe gusa. Iki ni igihe cy’urujijo rukomeye, aho amarangamutima ahinduka cyane. Iki ni cyo gihe abantu benshi biyahura kandi bakagerageza kwiyahura.

Nk’uko raporo z’Ishami ry’Umuryango w’Abibumbye ryita ku Buzima (OMS) n’indi miryango zibivuga, kwiyahura ni cyo kintu cya kabiri gitera impfu mu bana bari hagati y’imyaka 10 na 14, kikaba ari na cyo cya gatatu gitera impfu mu rubyiruko ruri hagati y’imyaka 15 na 24 (nyuma y’impanuka n’ubwicanyi). Birashoboka kandi ko kugerageza kwiyahura ari ibintu bikunze kugaragara kurusha kwiyahura nyabyo.

Ingorane ziterwa n'ibikoresho byo mu rugo

Iki nacyo ni ingenzi cyane. Cyane cyane niba hari ibintu nk'imbunda mu nzu, ibyago byo kwiyahura biri hejuru cyane. Mu bihugu nka Amerika, bivugwa ko 60% by'abiyahura biterwa n'imbunda. Kubwibyo, niba ufite ikintu nk'icyo mu nzu yawe, ugomba kukibika ahantu abana batagera, ukagikuramo amasasu, hanyuma ukagifunga neza.

Mu buryo nk'ubwo, imiti irenze urugero ni yo mpamvu ikunze gutuma umuntu yiyahura kandi akagerageza kwiyahura. Witondere imiti igurishwa ku giciro cya muganga n'imiti yanditswe na muganga. Bamwe mu rubyiruko basangira imiti n'inshuti zabo ku ishuri, cyangwa bakayibika mu gikapu cyangwa mu kabati. Niyo mpamvu ari ngombwa gukurikiranira hafi imiti yose mu rugo.

Ese hari itandukaniro hagati y'abakobwa n'abahungu?

Ku bijyanye no kwiyahura, hari itandukaniro hagati y'abakobwa n'abahungu. Abakobwa bafite amahirwe akubye kabiri yo gutekereza no kugerageza kwiyahura kurusha abahungu. Akenshi bagerageza kubikora bakoresheje imiti irenze urugero cyangwa bakica udukoko.

Ariko, abahungu mu by’ukuri bafite amahirwe akubye inshuro enye yo gupfa bishwe no kwiyahura kurusha abakobwa. Impuguke zizera ko ibi biterwa nuko abahungu bakoresha uburyo bwo kwica cyane.

Ni ubuhe bwoko bw'abana bato bugarijwe n'akaga kurusha ubundi?

Twese twanyuze mu buto bwacu. Nubwo bwari bwiza, turabyibuka nk'igihe cy'urujijo kandi giteye urujijo hagati y'ubwana n'ubukure. Ku ruhande rumwe, hari ibyo twiteze byinshi, naho ku rundi ruhande, hari igitutu kinini n'inshingano. Hari igitutu cyo kwihuza n'inshuti, gutsinda neza mu ishuri, no kuba umuntu ushoboye.

Muri icyo gihe kandi, abana batangira gutekereza ku bintu nk'imiterere y'igitsina n'imibanire. Biyumvamo ko bakeneye ubwisanzure kandi rimwe na rimwe bagongana n'amategeko y'ababyeyi babo.

Abana bato, cyane cyane abafite ibibazo byo mu mutwe , bashobora kugira ibitekerezo byo kwiyahura .

Urugero:

• Guhangayika
• Ihungabana
• Indwara ya Bipolar
• Gusinzira

Nanone, abana bahura n'impinduka zikomeye mu buzima (gutandukana kw'ababyeyi, kwimukira ahandi, umubyeyi uva mu rugo akajya mu gisirikare, ibibazo by'ubukungu by'umuryango) n'abana batotezwa, ivanguramoko, cyangwa bashyirwa mu kato mu bundi buryo bari mu kaga gakomeye.

Tekereza gato, rimwe na rimwe ikintu gisa n'aho ari gito kuri twe gishobora kuba ikibazo gikomeye ku mwana muto.

Dore izindi mpamvu zishobora gutera ibyago :

• Indwara zo mu mutwe, cyane cyane ihungabana, indwara y’ibicurane, kunywa ibiyobyabwenge n’inzoga (mu by’ukuri, 95% by’abantu biyahura baba bafite indwara zo mu mutwe icyo gihe).
• Kumva ufite stress ikomeye, kurakara no kubura amahoro.
• Kwiheba no kumva nta cyo umaze bizanwa no kwiheba.
• Kuba narigeze kugerageza kwiyahura.
• Kugira amateka yo kwiheba cyangwa kwiyahura mu muryango.
• Gukorerwa ihohoterwa ryo mu mutwe, ku mubiri cyangwa ihohoterwa rishingiye ku gitsina.
• Kutagira itsinda rishyigikirana, kutagira umubano mwiza n'ababyeyi cyangwa inshuti, kumva uri wenyine muri sosiyete.
• Kubura inkunga ituruka mu muryango cyangwa muri sosiyete iyo bari mu mimerere yo kwibaza ku miterere yabo y'igitsina cyangwa imibonano mpuzabitsina. (Iki ni ikibazo gikomeye cyane, abo bana bakeneye urukundo n'ubwumvikane bwinshi).

Ni ibihe bimenyetso bishobora kudufasha kumenya ibi hakiri kare?

Akenshi, abana bato biyahura baba baraburiye abo bakundaga cyangwa bakabamenyesha mbere y’igihe. Kubwibyo, ni ngombwa cyane ko ababyeyi bamenya ibi bimenyetso by’umuburo. Icyo gihe ni bwo bashobora guha abo bana ubufasha bukenewe vuba bishoboka.

Ubu bwoko bw'ibimenyetso bukunze kugaragara nyuma y'ikintu gihangayikishije, nk'ikibazo ku ishuri, gutandukana n'umukunzi/inshuti, urupfu rw'uwo ukunda, gutandukana, cyangwa amakimbirane akomeye mu muryango.

Umwana muto urimo gutekereza kwiyahura ashobora gukora ibintu nk'ibi:

• Hari ibiganiro bikunze kuvugwa ku kwiyahura cyangwa urupfu.
• Amabwiriza nka "Sinzaba nkiri hano ukundi."
• Kuvuga ku gutenguha cyangwa kwicira urubanza.
• Kuba kure y'inshuti cyangwa umuryango.
• Bandika indirimbo, imivugo n'amabaruwa bivuga ku rupfu, gutandukana, no gupfusha.
• Batangira guha abavandimwe babo bato n'inshuti ibintu by'agaciro bakundaga cyane (urugero: ibitabo, ibikinisho, imyenda).
• Utakaza ubushake mu bintu wakundaga mbere.
• Biba bigoye kwibanda ku kintu no gutekereza neza.
• Hari impinduka zikomeye mu mirire cyangwa mu gusinzira (guhita urya cyane/utarya, gusinzira cyane/utarya na gato).
• Akora ibikorwa biteza akaga (urugero: gutwara imodoka vuba cyane, gukoresha ibiyobyabwenge).
• Gutakaza ubushake mu kazi k'ishuri no mu mikino.

Ni iki twakora nk'ababyeyi?

Nkuko twabivuze mbere, urubyiruko rwinshi rutanga ibimenyetso by'umuburo mbere yo kugerageza kwiyahura. Rero, ni ngombwa kumenya ibi bimenyetso. Nubwo atari buri kwiyahura gushobora kwirindwa, kumenya no gufata ingamba zo gufasha urubyiruko rufite ibibazo bishobora kugira ingaruka zikomeye.

Bamwe mu bantu bakuru bibwira bati: "Aba bana bakora ibi kugira ngo bitabweho." Ariko iyo tubyirengagije kuko dutekereza ko ari ukwita ku bandi, mu by'ukuri bituma umwana ashobora kwiyangiza. Kujya mu cyumba cy’ubutabazi bw’ibanze, kujya kwa muganga, cyangwa kujya mu kigo cyita ku bana si ibintu abana bato bakunda gukora - keretse niba bafite agahinda gakomeye, batekereza kwiyahura, cyangwa byibuze bifuza ko bapfa. Rero, ntugasuzugure ibi bimenyetso by'umuburo nk'"ukwita ku bandi," bigomba gufatwa nk'ibintu bikomeye cyane.

Reba witonze, tega amatwi witonze.

Jya witonda umwana muto ufite agahinda kandi wigunze. Ni ngombwa gusobanukirwa ihungabana mu bana bato, kuko rishobora gutandukana n'ibimenyetso dusanzwe dutekereza ko ari ihungabana. Urugero, aho guhora ubabaye, urira, rishobora kugaragara mu bintu nko kugirana ibibazo n'inshuti, amanota mabi, ibibazo byo gusinzira, kurakara igihe cyose, no kuba umunyamahane.

Komeza inzira zo kuganira zifunguye uko bishoboka kose. Menyesha umwana wawe ko umwitayeho, umushyigikiye kandi umukunda. Niba umwana wawe akubwiye ikintu kiri mu mutwe, umwereke ko ugifata nk'ikintu gikomeye. Tekereza kuri ibyo, kurwana n'inshuti bishobora kuba bitagukomereye, ariko bishobora kumubabaza cyane no kumubabaza umwana muto. Ntugapfobye cyangwa ngo wirengagize ibyo umwana wawe arimo ahura na byo. Ibyo bishobora gutuma arushaho kurakara.

Niba umwana wawe afite ikibazo cyo kuvugana nawe, gira inama yo kuvugana n'undi muntu. Urugero, undi muvandimwe, umupadiri, umutoza, umujyanama w'ishuri, cyangwa umuganga w'umwana wawe.

Ntutinye kubaza ibibazo.

Hari ababyeyi batinya kubaza abana babo niba bigeze batekereza kwiyahura cyangwa kwiyahura. Hari abumva ko kubabaza bizashyira umwana wabo mu mutwe igitekerezo.

Ariko, ni byiza kubaza buri gihe, nubwo byaba bigoye. Hari igihe bishobora kuba ingirakamaro gusobanura impamvu ubaza. Urugero, ushobora kuvuga uti: "Mwana wanjye, nabonye ko wagiye uvuga ko wifuza gupfa. Ese koko ufite ibitekerezo byo kwiyahura?"

Ni gute tubona ubufasha?

Niba ukeka ko umwana wawe arimo gutekereza kwiyahura, shaka ubufasha ako kanya. Umuganga w'umuryango wawe ashobora kukwohereza kwa muganga w'imitekerereze y'abantu cyangwa uw'indwara zo mu mutwe. Cyangwa, ushobora kubona urutonde rw'abaganga bo mu gace utuyemo mu ishami ry'ubuvuzi bwo mu mutwe ry'ibitaro byo mu gace utuyemo. Ushobora kandi kubona aya makuru mu ishyirahamwe ry'ubuzima bwo mu mutwe ryo mu gace utuyemo cyangwa ishyirahamwe ry'abaganga bo mu karere utuyemo.

Mu gihe cy’impanuka, ushobora guhamagara cyangwa kohereza ubutumwa bugufi kuri izi nimero za telefoni mpuzamahanga:

• 988 Umuyoboro w'Ubuzima wo Kwiyahura no Kwibasirwa n'Ibibazo: Ushobora guhamagara cyangwa kohereza ubutumwa bugufi kuri 988. Ushobora kandi kubavugisha ukoresheje urubuga rwabo.
• Trevor Lifeline ku muryango wa LGBTQ: Hamagara 1-866-488-7386 cyangwa wohereze ubutumwa bugufi START kuri 678678. Ushobora kandi kubavugisha ukoresheje urubuga rwabo.

Izi ni serivisi z'ubuntu hamwe n'inzobere zabihuguriwe. Ibiganiro byawe bizagirwa ibanga. Izi ni serivisi mpuzamahanga. Ushobora kubona ubufasha binyuze muri izi serivisi, cyangwa urebe niba hari serivisi nk'iyi muri Sri Lanka. Ariko, mu gihe cyihutirwa, hamagara vuba Serivisi y'Indwara z'Abatabazi ya Suwaseriya yo mu 1990, cyangwa ujye mu bitaro biri hafi yawe.

Niba umwana wawe ari mu bihe bikomeye, icyumba cy’ibizamini cy’ingoboka cya hafi yawe gishobora gukora isuzuma ry’indwara zo mu mutwe kikakohereza ku bikoresho bikenewe. Niba utazi neza niba ugomba kujyana umwana wawe mu cyumba cy’ibizamini by’ingoboka,Vugana na muganga.

Niba warafashe gahunda yo kubonana n'umujyanama w'ubuzima bwo mu mutwe , menya neza ko ugiye muri gahunda, nubwo umwana wawe yaba avuze ati "Ndi meze neza ubu," cyangwa "Sindi bugende." Ibitekerezo byo kwiyahura bishobora kuza hanyuma bikagenda. Ariko, umwana wawe akeneye ubufasha mu guteza imbere ubumenyi bwo gucunga ibi bitekerezo n'imyitwarire mu gihe cy'ibibazo.

Niba umwana wawe adashaka kujya mu nama, bwira umuhanga mu by’ubuzima bwo mu mutwe. Mu kujya mu nama wenyine cyangwa mukorana n’umuhanga, ushobora gukomeza gufungurira umwana wawe kugira ngo abone ubufasha akeneye. Uyu muhanga azakwigisha uburyo bwo gutuma umwana wawe yifuza kubona ubufasha.

Wibuke ko amakimbirane hagati y'ababyeyi n'abana ashobora kurushaho kubangamira umwana muto wumva ari wenyine, atazwi neza, cyangwa adashimwa, ndetse ashobora no kugira ibitekerezo byo kwiyahura. Shaka ubufasha ku bibazo byo mu muryango kandi ubikemure mu buryo bwiza. Niba hari umuntu wo mu muryango wawe ufite amateka yo kwiheba, kunywa ibiyobyabwenge, cyangwa ihohoterwa ryo mu ngo, bwira umuhanga mu by'ubuzima bwo mu mutwe. Muganire kandi ku bindi bibazo bihangayikishije mu rugo (urugero, ahantu hahora hakomeye).

Niba umwana apfuye yiyahuye...

Ku babyeyi, urupfu rw'umwana ni ububabare budasanzwe. Ku babyeyi bapfushije umwana wabo bazize kwiyahura, ububabare n'agahinda bishobora kuba bikomeye kurushaho. Ibi byiyumvo bishobora kutazigera bishira burundu. Ariko, abahuye n'ibyo bibazo bashobora gutera intambwe zo gutangira urugendo rwo gukira:

• Komeza uhuze n'abandi. Nyuma yo kwiyahura, abagize umuryango bashobora kumva bari bonyine, batazi icyo bavugana n'inshuti cyangwa uko bagufasha. Ushobora kuganira ku mwana wawe, uko wumva umerewe, kandi ugashaka abantu bazagushyigikira. Niba abantu bagukikije basa n'abadashaka kukuvugisha, tangira ikiganiro ubwawe kandi ubasabe ubufasha.
• Wibuke ko abandi bagize umuryango bababaye kandi ko buri wese ababara mu buryo butandukanye. Abandi bana bawe, cyane cyane, bashobora kugerageza kwihanganira agahinda kabo bonyine, bizeye ko katazababera umutwaro. Mushyigikirane mu marira, mu burakari, no mu guceceka. Niba bibaye ngombwa, shaka ubufasha n'inkunga hamwe.
• Tegereza ko isabukuru, iminsi mikuru y'amavuko, n'iminsi mikuru bizaba bigoye. Iminsi mikuru y'ingenzi ishobora kugarura ibyiyumvo byo gutakaza no guhangayika. Muri iyo minsi, kora ibikwiranye n'ibyo ukeneye mu byiyumvo - byaba ari ukumarana umwanya n'umuryango n'inshuti, cyangwa kumarana umunsi wiherereye utekereza.
• Sobanukirwa ko ari ibisanzwe kumva ufite icyaha ukibaza uti "Ibi byagenze bite?" Ariko kandi ni ngombwa kumva ko ushobora kutazabona ibisubizo wifuza. Gukira uko igihe kigenda kiza iyo ugeze aho ubabarira umwana wawe nawe ubwawe.
• Amatsinda y'ubujyanama n'ubufasha ashobora kuba uburyo bwiza bwo kugufasha kumenya ko utari wenyine. Hari igihe imiryango yabuze abana muri ubu buryo iba imwe mu miyoboro yo kwirinda kwiyahura ifasha ababyeyi, urubyiruko, n'amashuri gukumira ibyo bibazo mu gihe kizaza.

Ni gute wafasha umwana muto uhanganye n'ikibazo cyo kwiyahura kw'inshuti ye?

Wakora iki iyo umuntu umwana wawe azi yagerageje kwiyahura cyangwa yapfuye yiyahuye? Ubwa mbere, menya amarangamutima y'umwana wawe. Abana bamwe bato bavuga ko bumva bafite icyaha—cyane cyane ababona ko bagombaga gusobanukirwa neza ibikorwa n'amagambo by'inshuti yabo.

Abandi bavuga ko bumva barakariye umuntu wagerageje/wiyahuye kubera gukora ikintu nk'icyo cy’ubwikunde. Abandi bavuga ko bumva badashaka cyangwa ngo bazi uko bagaragaza uko bumva. Menyesha umwana wawe ko nta byiyumvo byiza cyangwa bibi, kandi ko nta kibazo kubiganiraho igihe azaba yiteguye.

Iyo umuntu agerageje kwiyahura akarokoka, abantu bashobora gutinya no kutavuga nabi. Bwira umwana wawe kutagira aho aba kure mu gihe nk'iki - iki ni cyo gihe umuntu aba akeneye kuvugana n'abandi.

Amashuri menshi, nyuma y'uko umunyeshuri yiyahuye, azana abajyanama badasanzwe kugira ngo baganire n'abanyeshuri kandi babafashe guhangana n'ibibazo. Niba umwana wawe arimo guhura n'ikibazo cy'inshuti cyangwa umunyeshuri wiyahuye, koresha izi nyandiko, cyangwa umutere inkunga yo kuvugana nawe cyangwa undi muntu mukuru wizeye.

Amaherezo, ikintu cy'ingenzi cyo kwibuka...

Kwiyahura ni ikibazo kigoye, ariko akenshi gishobora kwirindwa. Ni ngombwa cyane kuganira n'urubyiruko rwacu mu buryo bweruye, kubaha urukundo no kubashyigikira, no kumva icyo bavuga.

Niba wumva umwana wawe afite ikibazo, ntugatinye gushaka ubufasha bw'inzobere. Si ikimenyetso cy'intege nke, ni ikimenyetso cy'imbaraga. Ntabwo uri wenyine muri uru rugendo. Gusaba ubufasha, gutanga ubufasha, ni byo byose dushobora gukora kugira ngo turinde abana bacu.

Kwiyahura , abana bato, ubuzima bwo mu mutwe, kwiheba, ibintu bishobora gutera ibyago, ubufasha ku babyeyi, ubujyanama