Yu pikin kin vɛks ɛn kray wantɛm wantɛm? (Temper Tantrums) - Mek wi tok abaut dis!

We yu smɔl pikin vɛks wantɛm wantɛm, ala, ɛn rol rawnd na grɔn de kray, sɔntɛm yu go fil bɔku prɛshɔn pan yu at, nɔto so? Sɔntɛnde, yu nɔ kin ivin tink bɔt wetin fɔ du. Dis na rili ɛkspiriɛns we bɔku mama ɛn papa dɛn kin gɛt. So tide, lɛ wi tɔk bɔt dɛn kayn we aw pikin dɛn kin vɛks, ɔ wetin wi kin kɔl `( temper tantrums )` pan pikin dɛn .

Wetin rili na dis we aw pɔsin kin vɛks?

Fɔ tɔk am simpul wan, dis na we fɔ mek pikin fri wantɛm wantɛm di we aw i de fil we i de vɛks, we i de fil bad, ɔ we i nɔ ebul fɔ kɔntrol. Dis nɔto sɔntin we dɛn plan fɔ du. Sɔntɛnde dɛn kin ala wit wɔd, ɔ dɛn kin fri dis wamat bay we dɛn de shek dɛn bɔdi ɔ flay dɛn an ɛn fut dɛn. Sɔm pikin dɛn kin du ɔl tu.

Yu go si se yu pikin de biev trangayes, i de mɔna ɔda pipul dɛn, ɛn bɔku tɛm i de du tin we nɔ fayn. Bɔku tɛm dis kin bi bikɔs dɛn nɔ no aw fɔ tɛl yu di rayt tin we dɛn want ɔ aw dɛn de fil .

Imajin, yu tɛl smɔl pikin fɔ put di tɔys, ɔ we yu go na di stoa ɛn se, "Gi mi da chɔklɛt de, " yu se nɔ. Ivin sɔntin we smɔl lɛk dis kin mek dɛn rol rawnd na grɔn, ala, ɛn kik dɛn an, ɛn dis kin mek big big krawd. Dat min se, di we aw dɛn kin biev kin big pas di tin we apin insɛf .

Yu tink se wi fɔ fred dɛn kayn we ya we yɔŋ pikin dɛn kin vɛks?

fכ tru, dεn ``Temper Tantrums`` ya na n כmal pat pan pikin in divεlכpmεnt . Dɛn kin apin as dɛn de tray fɔ bi mɔ indipɛndɛnt. Dis sik kin bɔrku bitwin di ej dɛm wae de bitwin 1 ɛn 4. Sɔm pikin dɛm kin gɛt dis kin apin jɔs wan tɛm insay di de.

Bɔt as dɛn bigin fɔ go skul ɛn ebul fɔ tɔk wetin dɛn nid, dis tin kin go dɔŋ smɔl smɔl. Bɔku tɛm, dɛn vɛks ya kin tek frɔm tu to 15 minit .

Bɔt if yu pikin in wamat pas 15 minit ɛn di pikin de biev bad bad wan, dat kin mek yu wɔri. If na so, fɔ tru Di bɛst tin fɔ du na fɔ tɔk to dɔktɔ .

Wetin mek smɔl pikin dɛn kin vɛks so? Wetin na di rizin dɛn?

Bɔku rizin dɛn kin de we kin mek pikin dɛn vɛks. Na sɔm pan di men rizin dɛn:

• Frustration: Na frustration wae kin kam wae yu nor kin achiv wetin yu set out for du, wae yu nor kin du somtin gud.
• Wi nid fɔ pe atɛnshɔn :We a nid yu atɛnshɔn.
• Want sɔntin (tɔys, it): We yu nɔ gɛt am.
• Tray fɔ nɔ du sɔntin: Fɔ ɛgzampul, we dɛn aks am fɔ put tɔys dɛn, ɔ we dɛn aks am fɔ go na os we dɛn de ple.
• Angri : Smɔl pikin dɛn kin rili rɛst we dɛn angri.
• Taya: We yu taya pasmak ɔ yu nɔ de slip fayn, dat kin mek yu vɛks.

Apat frɔm dis, big big kɔnflikt de na yɔŋ pikin dɛn maynd. Dat min se, dɛn rili want fɔ du tin dɛn fɔ dɛnsɛf ɛn fɔ bi indipɛndɛnt , pan ɔl we dɛnsɛf rili nid fɔ mek dɛn mama ɛn papa pe atɛnshɔn ɛn lɛk dɛn . Dɛn de ɔnda bɔku prɛshɔn bitwin dɛn tu pipul ya. Dɔn bak, dɛn nɔ tan lɛk big pipul dɛn, dɛn nɔ dɔn ebul fɔ bia wit di prɔblɛm yet fɔ kɔntrol aw dɛn de fil ɛn fɔ dil wit tin dɛn we kin mek dɛn at pwɛl. Bikɔs dɛn nɔ gɛt di sɛns fɔ tɔk bɔt aw dɛn de fil wit wɔd, dɛn kin tɔk dɛn filin dɛn de di we we izi fɔ dɛn no, we na bay we dɛn de ala, kray, ɛn strɛs. I tan lɛk se yu de ala se, "A want dis!"

I min se a na bad mama ɔ papa we mi pikin vɛks?

Nɔto so atɔl! Di we aw yu pikin de vɛks nɔ de mek yu bi bad mama ɔ papa. Dis impɔtant fɔ ɔndastand. Di we aw pikin kin vɛks kin afɛkt di kayn pɔsin we i bi, di say we i de da tɛm de, ɛn di tru tin we se na nɔmal tin we kin mek i gro . Dis na nɔmal tin we pɔsin kin du we i de gro . So nɔ blem yusɛf we yu nɔ nid.

Wetin na di sayn dɛn we de sho se pɔsin de vɛks? Aw yu no am?

We pikin vɛks, yu kin si dɛn sayn ya:

• Ɔltɛm i kin de kray, kray, ɛn ala.
• Kik, panch, sɔntɛm ivin bit.
• Dɛn de wev dɛn an ɛn fut, ɛn dɛn de tray tranga wan.
• Hol mi briz.
• Sɔntɛnde di bɔdi kin tɛns , ɔ i kin go .

Wetin wi kin du we pikin vɛks?

Okay, naw lɛ wi si aw wi fɔ biev we wi pikin vɛks.

• Distɛkt: If yu si se yu pikin de kam fɔ vɛks, bɔt i stil tan lɛk se dɛn nɔ ebul fɔ kɔntrol am atɔl, tray kwik kwik wan fɔ pul in atɛnshɔn. Sho dɛn sɔntin we dɛn lɛk, put dɛn pan ɔda gem ɔ aktiviti.
• Stay calm: Dis na di tin we impɔtant pas ɔl. We yu pikin de vɛks, nɔ ala, trɛtin, gi lɛkchɔ, ɔ agyu. If yu du dat, i go jɔs mek di pɔsin we de vɛks bad bad wan. Leta, we yu pikin dɔn kol ɛn kwayɛt, tɔk bɔt aw i de biev.
• Nɔ ignore fɔ vɛks:Dis kin tich di pikin se dɛn nɔ kin biev dis kayn we ɛn aks fɔ wetin dɛn want, ɛn dis na bihayvya we dɛn nɔ kin gri wit.
• Kip yu pikin in yay: If yu de na stɔ ɔ ɔda pɔblik ples, ɔltɛm mek yu pikin de si ɛn yu pikin nɔ de si yu. If yu de wɔri se yu pikin go du bad to insɛf ɔ ɔda pipul dɛn, pul am na di say we i de.
• Mek shɔ se yu sef: Rimov tin dɛn we kin denja (shap tin dɛn, tin dɛn we kin brok) na di say we di pikin de. If sɔntɛnde yu pikin de tray fɔ du bad to insɛf, tek tɛm ol am. If yu pikin de biev we yu nɔ ebul fɔ kɔntrol, kɛr am go na say we sef ɛn lɛf am te i kol. If nid de, yu kin gi am ``Time-out''. Dat min se, tray fɔ sɛn am na rum we nɔ gɛt TV ɔ ɔda tɔys, usay i go ebul fɔ de in wan fɔ sɔm tɛm.

Nɔ tɔk bɔt dɛn tin ya:

• Giv in to wetin yu pikin want, chenj yu maynd: Dis go ɛp yu pikin fɔ lan se we i vɛks, i kin gɛt wetin i want bay we i kray ɛn fɛt. If yu de na os ɛn yu shɔ se yu pikin sef, yu kin lɛf am na ɔda rum.
• Nɔ bit, bit, ɔ kik bak: Yu go tink se if yu du dat, i go mek yu pikin ɔndastand se dɛn tin ya de mek i fil bad. Bɔt di kɔmɔn tin kin apin. di pikin go tink se i okay fo du dis bikohs mama/papa de du am. Bifo dat, tɛl am klia wan se wetin i de du de mek i fil bad ɛn i nɔ bad.

Wetin yu kin du afta yu dɔn win yu wamat?

We di wamat dɔn stɔp ɛn yu pikin dɔn kol, yu kin tɔk to dɛn bɔt wetin apin. Yu kin tɔk bak bɔt wetin yu go du fɔ mek yu nɔ gɛt di sem kayn vɛks we yu de vɛks igen. Tray dis:

• Prez yu pikin fɔ we i de kol at: Prez yu pikin fɔ di gud we aw i de biev ɛn di gud tin dɛn we i dɔn disayd fɔ du. Smɔl pikin dɛn lɛk fɔ mek pipul dɛn no dɛn fɔ di gud wok we dɛn de du. Bi spɛshal wan as yu ebul. Insted fo jos se, "Yu de du big," tok somtin laik, "Yu no ala fo stoa, yu tok kwait, son." Dis kin ɛp yu pikin fɔ lan wetin dɛn de op fɔ ɛn wetin fɔ biev fayn.
• Ɔndastand aw yu pikin de fil: Mek yu pikin no se yu ɔndastand aw dɛn de fil bad. Tɛl dɛn se yu want fɔ ɛp. Bɔku tɛm, pikin dɛn kin tray fɔ pe atɛnshɔn to dɛn. So, if yu ɔndastand dɛn ɛn tɔk to dɛn, dat go ɛp fɔ mek dɛn nɔ fil fayn.
• Tich dɛn fɔ gi nem to aw dɛn de fil: Yɔŋ pikin dɛn nɔ gɛt di wɔd dɛn fɔ tɔk bɔt aw dɛn de fil. Dɛn nɔ no aw fɔ sho aw dɛn at pwɛl, jɛlɔs, vɛks, ɔ pwɛl at. ``Temper Tantrums'' na we fɔ mek dɛn sho dɛn filin de. Gi dɛn wɔd dɛn fɔ dɛn filin dɛn de. Fɔ ɛgzampul, "A kin si se yu vɛks rayt naw. Yu de kray, ɛn yu fes rɛd."
• Tich aw fɔ dil wit kɔmpleks filin dɛn:Ɛp dɛn fɔ lan aw fɔ dil wit prɔblɛm we dɛn nɔ go fred. Dɔn dɛn go lan se dɛnsɛf go ebul fɔ sɔlv sɔm pan dɛn prɔblɛm dɛn. Dɔn dɛn go bigin fɔ du dɛnsɛf mɔ ɛn dɛn nɔ go vɛks.
• Sɛt gud ɛgzampul: Pikin dɛn kin luk to dɛn mama ɛn papa ɔltɛm. Dɛn kin falamakata di we aw yu de biev. We yu vɛks ɔ yu at pwɛl, sho yu pikin di fayn we aw yu de dil wit dɛn filin dɛn de. Dɔn yu pikin go bigin fɔ biev di sem we.

Yu tink se we dɛn de fɔ mek dɛn nɔ vɛks pan dɛn?

Fɔ tɔk tru, yu nɔ go ebul fɔ mek ples usay yu nɔ go vɛks atɔl. Dis na bikɔs pikin dɛn kin tɔk bɔt wetin dɛn nid ɛn aw dɛn de fil. Na nɔmal pat pan di divɛlɔpmɛnt. Bɔt tin dɛn de we yu kin du fɔ mek yu nɔ vɛks bɔku tɛm ɛn fɔ mek yu nɔ vɛks bad bad wan:

• Gi dɛn tin dɛn we yu go disayd fɔ du: Gi dɛn tin dɛn we yu go disayd fɔ du insay di rayt say. Fɔ ɛgzampul, fɔ pik bitwin tu klos dɛn, ɔ fɔ pik bitwin tu it dɛn. We dɛn ebul fɔ disayd fɔ du sɔntin, pikin dɛn kin fil se dɛn ebul fɔ kɔntrol dɛnsɛf. Bɔt mek shɔ se yu fil fayn fɔ pik bitwin tu tin dɛn. Nɔ gi dɛn lay lay op.
• Pripia fɔ chenj: Transishɔn lɛk fɔ kɔmɔt na os ɔ fɔ kam bak frɔm ple kin tranga fɔ pikin dɛn. So, rɛdi dɛn fɔ dɛn chenj ya bifo dɛn apin. Fɔ big chenj (nyu pikin we jɔyn di famili, muf os), i bɛtɛ fɔ pripia yu pikin.
• Chek yu it ɛn slip: Sɔntɛnde, we yu vɛks kin mek yu vɛks bak. Dis bihayvya kin bi bikɔs yu nɔ de it fayn ɛn yu nɔ de slip fayn . So, mek shɔ se yu pikin de it di rayt it ɛn i de slip fayn.

Ustɛm a fɔ tɔk to dɔktɔ bɔt di we aw mi smɔl pikin de vɛks?

I fayn fɔ tɔk to yu pikin in dɔktɔ pan dɛn tin ya:

• If dɛn tantrum ya kɔntinyu afta di pikin dɔn ol 4 ia , ɔ if i kin kam bɔku tɛm.
• If di pikin wund insɛf, du bad to ɔda pipul dɛn, ɔ pwɛl tin dɛn na os we i vɛks.
• If di pikin ol in briz we i vɛks (especially if i nɔ no natin da tɛm de).
• If di pikin gɛt ed we de at ɔltɛm, bɛlɛ de at, ɛn ``Ansiety`` (frayd/wɔri we nɔ nid fɔ de) .
• Yu kin si am se i nɔ kin izi fɔ yu fɔ dil wit dɛn wamat ya, ɛn yu nɔ go no aw fɔ dil wit dɛn sef wan.

We yu go to dɔktɔ, i go aks yu kwɛstyɔn dɛn bɔt dɛn wamat dɛn ya. Dɛn kwɛstyɔn ya go ɛp am fɔ ɔndastand if dis na nɔmal tin ɔ na sɔntin we i fɔ wɔri bɔt:

• Ustɛm dɛn vɛksteshɔn ya kin apin?
• Wetin kin apin bifo yu vɛks?
• Wetin yu kin du we yu pikin vɛks?
• Aw lɔng yu dɔn vɛks?
• Aw yu kin du dat?
• Aw di pikin de biev we i nɔ vɛks?
• Yu tink se big chenj bin apin na di os ɔ di skul?
• Yu dɔn muf go na os i nɔ tu te yet?
• Big chenj dɔn de na di famili (divɔs, bɔn nyu pikin)?
• Sɔntin bin mek di pikin ɔ ɛni ɔda pɔsin na di famili fil bad ɔ mek i fil bad?
• Di pikin gɛt ɔda prɔblɛm, fɔ ɛgzampul, prɔblɛm wit slip ɔ prɔblɛm wit aw i de biev?

Mek wi mɛmba (Take-Home Message) .

Fɔ vɛks, pan ɔl we i kin mek pikin vɛks smɔl, na nɔmal tin fɔ mek pikin gro. Bɔku tɛm, yɔŋ pikin dɛn, mɔ di wan dɛn we ol bitwin 1 ɛn 4 ia, kin vɛks bad bad wan, ilɛksɛf na wan ɔ tu tɛm nɔmɔ dɛn kin vɛks insay di de. Bɔku tɛm dis kin bi bikɔs ɔf wan kɔnfyushɔn bitwin dɛn nid fɔ indipɛndɛns ɛn dɛn nid fɔ mek dɛn mama ɛn papa pe atɛnshɔn to dɛn. Dɔn bak, smɔl pikin dɛn nɔ kin ebul fɔ tɔk bɔt aw dɛn de fil.

We yu pikin vɛks, na fɔ de kwayɛt as yu ebul. Tray fɔ ɔndastand aw yu pikin de fil. We yu pikin dɔn kol, gi am nem fɔ aw i de fil ɛn tich am aw fɔ dil wit di tin dɛn we de mek i fil bad mɔ.

Bɔt if yu pikin in vɛksteshɔn te pas 15 minit, i de mek i vɛks bad bad wan, ɔ i kɔntinyu afta i dɔn ol 4 ia, yu fɔ rili go to dɔktɔ. Dɔn bak, if i nɔ izi fɔ yu fɔ dil wit di prɔblɛm, nɔ shem fɔ aks fɔ ɛp.

` Pikin dɛn vɛks, pikin we de smɔl vɛks, vɛks, pikin dɛn bihayvya, advays fɔ mɛn pikin, kɔntrol pikin, pikin saikɔlɔji