Kodi mukuopa kwambiri kugwa m'chikondi? Tiyeni tikambirane za Philophobia!

Chikondi ndi chinthu chokongola, sichoncho? Koma kwa anthu ena, kuganiza zoyamba chibwenzi kapena kuyamba chibwenzi kungakhale koopsa komanso kovutitsa maganizo kwambiri. Kodi munayamba mwamvapo choncho? Ngati ndi choncho, uyu akhoza kukhala inu. Timatcha vutoli philophobia.

Kodi philophobia ndi chiyani?

Mwachidule, Philophobia ndi mantha opitirira muyeso komanso osazolowereka a chikondi. Si mawu osavuta okha akuti, 'O, sindimakonda chikondi.' Ndi mantha ozama kwambiri komanso amphamvu kwambiri. Mantha amenewa amachititsa kuti anthu ena azivutika kwambiri, ndipo nthawi zina zosatheka, kuti apange ubale wachikondi. "Philos" ndi liwu lachigiriki lotanthauza wokondedwa. "Phobos" amatanthauza mantha. Choncho pamene awiriwa agwirizana, tanthauzo la 'mantha a chikondi' limayamba.

Taganizirani, Mfumukazi yoyamba ya ku England m'mbiri, Elizabeth, sanakwatirepo, ndipo ankadziwika kuti 'Namwali Mfumukazi.' Ena amakhulupirira kuti nayenso anali ndi vuto la philophobia.

Ndiye kodi mantha ndi chiyani?

Tsopano mwina mukudzifunsa kuti, 'Kodi mantha amenewa ndi otani?' Phobia ndi mantha aakulu komanso osazolowereka a zinthu zomwe sizingativulaze kwenikweni. Awa ndi matenda a nkhawa . Philophobia ndi matenda enaake a mantha . Ndiko kuti, mumaopa chinthu china chake, kuganiza zogwa m'chikondi panthawiyi, kapena mkhalidwe wonga umenewo.

Kodi philophobia ndi yofala bwanji?

N'zovuta kunena ndendende kuchuluka kwa anthu omwe ali ndi philophobia. Anthu ambiri amasunga mantha awo okha kapena sadziwa kuti ali nawo. Koma tikudziwa kuti pafupifupi munthu mmodzi pa akulu 10 ndi mmodzi mwa achinyamata 5 ku United States adzakumana ndi mantha enaake nthawi ina m'miyoyo yawo. Choncho philophobia ikhoza kukhala imodzi mwa izo.

Ndani ali pachiwopsezo chachikulu chotenga philophobia?

Kawirikawiri amati akazi ndi omwe amakhala ndi mantha amtunduwu. Palinso zinthu zina zingapo zomwe zimayambitsa matendawa:

• Mbiri ya banja: Ngati mwaonapo makolo anu kapena munthu wina wapafupi nanu akudwala matenda a mantha kapena nkhawa, nanunso mungakhale ndi mantha ofanana. Monga momwe mayi amaopera akangaude, mwana wakenso amaopera akangaude.
• Mphamvu ya majini: Kafukufuku wina akusonyeza kuti anthu ena ali ndi majini osiyanasiyana omwe amawapangitsa kukhala pachiwopsezo chachikulu cha matenda a nkhawa ndi mantha.
• Kukhala ndi mantha ena: N'zofala kukhala ndi mantha oposa amodzi. Munthu amene amaopa chikondi angakhalenso ndi mantha odzipereka (izi zimatchedwa gamophobia) , mantha okana, kapena mantha osiyidwa.

N’chifukwa chiyani ndikuopa chikondi kwambiri?

Taganizirani izi, n’chifukwa chiyani munthu angaope chinthu chokongola ngati chikondi? Nthawi zambiri, mukayang’ana mizu ya mantha amenewa, zimachokera ku zomwe zinachitika ali mwana . Kuopa Mulungu kuli ngati yankho loteteza . Ngati simulola kukonda munthu wina, malingaliro anu angaganize kuti mukudzipulumutsa ku ululu ndi ku ululu.

Nazi zina mwa zifukwa zomwe zingayambitse philophobia:

• Maubwenzi oipa akale: Tangoganizirani mwana amene ankaona makolo ake akumenyana kapena kusudzulana ali mwana. Kapena kholo limene linamwalira, kusiyidwa, kapena kuzunzidwa ali mwana... Zingakhale zovuta kwambiri kuti mwana amene wakumana ndi zinthu zimenezi azikonda ena. N’chimodzimodzinso ndi akuluakulu. Ngati ubale wakale unali wosakhulupirika, kusudzulana, nkhanza, kapena kusiyidwa, n’zosadabwitsa kuti amaopa kukondanso. Tangoganizirani, Nimali anapwetekedwa mtima kwambiri ndi chibwenzi chake choyamba. Pambuyo pake, amamva nkhawa komanso mantha akamaganiza zoyambitsanso chibwenzi.

• Kuopa kukanidwa kapena kusiyidwa: Ngati m'modzi mwa makolo anu anakusiyani muli mwana, chimenecho chingakhale chifukwa cha mantha anu a chikondi. Mukakanidwa nthawi zonse ndi anzanu ndi anzanu mukakula, mutha kuopa chikondi. Mungamve ngati 'wina angandisiyebe.'

• Kukakamizidwa ndi chikhalidwe kapena chipembedzo: Zikhalidwe zina siziganizira kwambiri za chikondi, ndipo maukwati amakonzedwa. Mungaope kugwa m'chikondi chifukwa mumaona kuti mulibe ufulu wosankha mnzanu. Komanso, ngati ndinu LGBTQ+, mungaope kugwa m'chikondi ngati chipembedzo chanu kapena chikhalidwe chanu chikutsutsa chibwenzicho. Poopa kunyalanyazidwa ndi anthu komanso kukanidwa ndi banja lanu.

• Matenda Oletsa Kukondana ndi Anthu (DSED): Mwana amene salandira chisamaliro, chikondi, ndi kuyamikiridwa komwe amafunikira kuchokera kwa makolo ake kapena akuluakulu ena odalirika ali mwana angayambe kuopa chikondi akamakula. Ana oterewa angagwirizane bwino ndi alendo kuposa omwe amawakonda. DSED ndi mtundu wa Matenda Okhudzana ndi Kukondana ndi Anthu Ena.

Kodi zizindikiro za philophobia ndi ziti?

Izi zingakhudze anthu omwe amaopa chikondi m'njira zosiyanasiyana. Mungakumane ndi izi:

• Ubale wapafupi komanso wapamtima sungatheke.
• Mukakhala pachibwenzi , mumakhala ndi nkhawa zambiri , ndipo nthawi zonse mumakhala ndi nkhawa kuti chibwenzicho chitha.
• Mumaopa mnzanu kapena momwe akumvera .
• Amakankhira anthu kutali kapena kutha mwadzidzidzi maubwenzi .

Mukakhala ndi chikondi, mungakumanenso ndi zizindikiro zakuthupi monga izi:

• Chizungulire
• Pakamwa pouma
• Kumva mantha aakulu kapena mantha
• Kusanza, kusanza, kapena kutsegula m'mimba
• Kutuluka thukuta kwambiri
• Kupuma mwachangu komanso kugunda kwa mtima
• Kugwedezeka kapena kunjenjemera
• Kupuma movutikira

Kodi mungadziwe bwanji philophobia?

Ndiye, kodi madokotala amazindikira bwanji philophobia? Bungwe la American Psychiatric Association lili ndi buku lotsogolera lotchedwa Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM). Akatswiri azaumoyo wamaganizo monga akatswiri a zamaganizo amagwiritsa ntchito bukuli pozindikira mantha kutengera zizindikiro ndi momwe zimakhudzira moyo wanu.

Madokotala amagwiritsa ntchito njira izi kuti adziwe vuto la mantha monga philophobia:

• Kuopa chikondi kosalekeza komwe kumatenga miyezi yosachepera isanu ndi umodzi .
• Mantha amphamvu kapena nkhawa zomwe zimabuka mukamamva chikondi.
• Zizindikiro za phobia zimawonekera mukakumana ndi wokondedwa wanu.
• Pewani kupereka kapena kulandira chikondi chifukwa nkhawa kapena mantha zimakulimbikitsani.
• Zizindikiro zoopsa zomwe zimalepheretsa kupanga ubale wothandiza komanso wapafupi.

Kodi philophobia imachiritsidwa bwanji?

Kodi palibe chithandizo cha izi? Inde chilipo. Chithandizo chotchedwa Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) chingakuthandizeni kuthana ndi philophobia. Iyi ndi njira ya psychotherapy. Mwachidule, ndi njira yolankhulirana. Zimakuthandizani kuzindikira malingaliro ndi machitidwe omwe amakupangitsani kuopa chikondi.

Mungapindulenso ndi mtundu wa chithandizo chokhudza anthu omwe ali ndi mantha otchedwa Systemic Desensitization Therapy . Chithandizo chokhudza anthu omwe ali ndi mantha enaake chimati chimathandiza anthu oposa 90% omwe ali ndi mantha enaake.

Umu ndi momwe zimagwirira ntchito:

• Mudzaphunzitsidwa kuthana ndi zizindikiro zanu pogwiritsa ntchito njira zopumulira monga kuchita masewera olimbitsa thupi opumira kwambiri komanso kusinkhasinkha.
• Pang'onopang'ono mumazindikira lingaliro la chikondi . Choyamba mumaganizira za chikondi, kenako mumalankhula za icho, kenako mumakumana ndi mavuto ang'onoang'ono.
• Imapereka ntchito zothandiza zomwe zingakuthandizeni kuzolowera kupereka ndi kulandira chikondi.

Kodi ndi mavuto ati omwe angayambitse philophobia?

Kodi chingachitike n’chiyani ngati titasiya kuopa chikondi kumeneku? Moyo wopanda chikondi ungakhudze thanzi lanu lakuthupi ndi la maganizo. Chifukwa cha zimenezi, mungakumane ndi mavuto ngati awa:

• Nkhawa, Kuvutika Maganizo, kapena Matenda a Mantha.
• Kwa amuna, ndi vuto la kusowa tulo.
• Matenda Ovutika Maganizo Pambuyo pa Zoopsa (PTSD).
• Matenda Ogwiritsa Ntchito Mankhwala Osokoneza Bongo.

Kodi muyenera kupita kwa dokotala liti?

Muyenera kuonana ndi dokotala ngati muli ndi chimodzi mwa zotsatirazi:

• Ziwopsezo zikubwera.
• Ngati muli ndi nkhawa yosalekeza yomwe imasokoneza moyo watsiku ndi tsiku kapena tulo.
• Ngati muli ndi zizindikiro za kuvutika maganizo kapena kugwiritsa ntchito mankhwala osokoneza bongo molakwika .

Kodi ndifunse dokotala wanga chiyani?

Mukapita kwa dokotala, mukhoza kufunsa mafunso monga awa:

• N’chifukwa chiyani ndili ndi mantha amenewa?
• Kodi chithandizo chabwino kwambiri kwa ine ndi chiti?
• Kodi ndiyenera kuyesa psychotherapy?
• Kodi ndifunika chithandizo kwa nthawi yayitali bwanji?
• Kodi mankhwala angathandize?

Pomaliza, kumbukirani...

Ndizachibadwa kuti tonsefe tiyese kudziteteza ku ululu ndi kuvulala. Koma ngati kuopa kwanu chikondi kukupangitsani kuvutika mwakuthupi kapena m'maganizo, kapena kusokoneza luso lanu lopanga ubale, pamenepo ndi pomwe vuto limayambira.

Kupatsa ndi kulandira chikondi kuyenera kukhala chinthu chomwe chimabweretsa chimwemwe.

Mukaopa chikondi chifukwa cha philophobia, dziko lanu likhoza kumva lokha. Koma kumbukirani, mutha kuphunzira kuthana ndi mantha awa kudzera mu zinthu monga CBT ndi desensitivity therapy . Pakapita nthawi, mudzatha kumanga ubale wachikondi ndi mnzanu, banja lanu, ndi anzanu. Musavutike nokha, pemphani thandizo. Simuli nokha.

` Philophobia, mantha a chikondi, mantha, nkhawa, thanzi la maganizo, chithandizo, maubwenzi