Kodi nonse mwakonzekadi musanakhale ndi mwana? (Kukonzekera musanayambe kutenga mimba)

Mukatsala pang'ono kukhala ndi mwana , kapena mukaganiza zokhala ndi mwana, n'zachibadwa kumva mantha pang'ono komanso mantha. "Kodi ndidzakhala mayi/bambo wabwino?", "Kodi ndidzatha kusamalira udindowu moyenera?", "Ndingaphunzire bwanji kusamalira mwana popanda kumuvulaza?" Mafunso ambiri angabwere m'maganizo mwanga. Nthawi zambiri timaganiza za mwana ngati loto lachikondi komanso lokongola. Koma kodi timamvetsadi kuti mkati mwa loto limenelo muli kusiyana kwakukulu ndi udindo waukulu womwe tiyenera kukumana nawo ngati anthu awiri?

N’zoona kuti palibe amene angakhale wokonzeka 100% kuti akhale mayi kapena bambo. Komabe, akatswiri amati mukamafotokoza kwambiri tanthauzo la kukhala mayi ndi bambo musanayambe kutenga pakati, zimakhala zosavuta kuzolowera moyo wanu watsopano mutakhala ndi mwana. Choncho, lero, tiyeni tikambirane zinthu zomwe inu ndi mnzanu muyenera kukambirana musanasankhe kukhala ndi mwana.

Zinthu zofunika kuziganizira musanachite 'Mayeso a Mimba' ndi 'Zabwino'

"Okwatirana ambiri saganizira za kukhala ndi mwana asanabadwe," akutero Dr. John Queenan, dokotala wa za mimba ndi matenda a akazi. "Saganizira za kutaya ufulu wawo wodziyimira pawokha, kukwera kwadzidzidzi kwa ndalama, ndi zomwe angachite ngati mwana adwala ngati onse awiri akugwira ntchito."

Koma zimenezo zikusintha. Madokotala tsopano amaona mimba osati ngati chochitika cha miyezi isanu ndi inayi yokha, koma ngati chochitika cha chaka chonse. Izi zikutanthauza kuti ndikofunikira kukonzekera mwakuthupi komanso m'maganizo musanayambe kutenga mimba. Musanaganize nkomwe zokhala ndi pakati, ndikofunikira kuganizira ngati muli okonzeka m'maganizo monga kholo, akutero Dr. Larry Culpepper, katswiri wa zamankhwala a m'banja .

Masiku ano, zipatala zina ndi malo osamalira amayi oyembekezera amapereka makalasi apadera ophunzirira asanatenge mimba omwe amakhudza mitu monga kulinganiza ntchito ndi banja, momwe kubereka mwana kumakhudzira ubale wanu, komanso momwe mungalangire ana anu.

Zosankha zomwe zingapangidwe pambuyo pa kukambirana kumeneku zitha kusiyana malinga ndi munthu ndi munthu.

• Anthu ena angaganize kuti, "Chabwino, tonsefe tiyenera kukonzekera zinthu izi tsopano."
• Ena adzamvetsa, "Ayi, sitinakonzekere kusintha kwakukulu kwa moyo wathu."
• Ena amaona kuti ayenera kuphunzira zinthu zofunika monga makolo asanayambe udindo wa khanda lobadwa kumene.

Ulendo wopita ku kukhala kholo si wophweka monga momwe mukuganizira.

Ulendo wa ubereki ndi wovuta, kotero nkhani zilizonse zomwe mungakambirane ndikuthetsa mwana asanabadwe sizidzakhala vuto limodzi lochepa loti muthane nalo panthawi ya ntchito zambiri za mwana wakhanda.

Makolo atsopano amakumana ndi mavuto ambiri azachuma, amaganizo, akuthupi, komanso okhudzana ndi kugonana . Koma makolo omwe amaika ziyembekezo zenizeni pachiyambi angawathandize kuthana ndi kusinthaku. Kafukufuku wopangidwa ndi Pulofesa Jay Belsky adapeza kuti 50% ya mabanja amapatukana atakhala ndi mwana . Pafupifupi 12%-13% ya mabanja amakumana ndi mikangano yambiri kotero kuti amayamba kutaya chidaliro mwa wina ndi mnzake komanso ukwati wawo. 30% ya mabanja amasunga ubale wawo, koma 19% yokha ya mabanja ndi omwe amakhala ogwirizana kwambiri.

"Anthu ambiri amaganiza kuti kukhala ndi mwana kudzapangitsa kuti banja likhale logwirizana kwambiri, koma sizichitika kawirikawiri," akutero Belsky. "Nthawi zambiri zimangowonjezera kusamvana pakati pa inu nonse. Zili ngati kuphunzira njira yatsopano yovina ndikuwonjezera liwiro la nyimboyo mwadzidzidzi."

Chifukwa chake, ngati nonse awiri simukugwirizana ndikukambirana moona mtima za zinthu monga "Chifukwa chiyani tikufuna kukhala ndi mwana?" ndi "Kodi malingaliro athu ndi osiyana bwanji?", pali mwayi waukulu woti pakhale kusamvana ndi kukakamizidwa.

Konzekerani kudabwa!

Kaya mukulankhula bwanji komanso kukonzekera bwanji, zinthu zosayembekezereka zingachitike. Muyeneranso kukonzekera zimenezo. Kukhala ndi mwana si chitsimikizo cha khalidwe la mwanayo kapena momwe mudzachitire ndi zinthu zatsopano monga kholo.

Ndicho chifukwa chake ndikofunikira kwambiri kukambirana ndi kugwirizana pa zinthu zomwe mungathe kuzilamulira pasadakhale. Mwanjira imeneyi, zinthu zomwe simungathe kuzilamulira komanso zomwe simukuziyembekezera zikadzachitika, simudzavutika nazo zonse.

Kungoti anthu awiri agwirizana sizikutanthauza kuti zonse zidzayenda bwino. Mwachitsanzo, tiyerekeze kuti m'modzi mwa okwatiranawo wasankha kuti ndikofunikira kuti akhale panyumba kuti asamalire mwana. Ntchito ya mwamuna imabweretsa ndalama zambiri, kotero mkaziyo wasankha kugwira ntchito kunyumba. Mwana akadwala, mkaziyo ayenera kusintha nthawi yake. Ngakhale izi zitakambidwa kale ndikusankhidwa pasadakhale, nthawi zina angaganize kuti, "Ndiyenera kuchita chilichonse ndekha ndikakhala ndi nthawi yomaliza." Ndizachibadwa kumva motere. Chofunika ndichakuti pakhale kulankhulana momasuka pakati pa inu nonse pankhaniyi.

Kukhala kholo labwino sikungochitika mwangozi. Ndi chinthu chomwe chiyenera kuphunziridwa. Zingawoneke zachilendo kuganizira zinthu izi musanakhale ndi mwana. Koma tiyenera kuganizira mozama za nthawi, mphamvu, komanso kudzipereka komwe kumafunika kuti munthu akhale kholo.

Ngakhale zonsezi zanenedwa, musadandaule kuti mulibe mayankho onse. Mwana asanabadwe, ndi nthawi yabwino kuyamba njirayi. Koma ndi njira. "Mwamwayi, mwana wobadwa kumene amafunikira zinthu zingapo. Amafunika kudya, amafunikira chikondi ndi chisamaliro, ayenera kukhala aukhondo," akutero Barbara Schofield, mphunzitsi wa zaumoyo wa ana. "Ndiko kukongola kwake. Sitiyenera kukhala ndi mayankho onse nthawi yomweyo. Mwa kuyamba kukambirana za mafunso awa msanga, tingapangitse chaka chathu choyamba kukhala chosavuta."