Ngaba ngamanye amaxesha uvakalelwa kukuba umntwana wakho akasafani nakuqala? Ngaba uyacaphuka ngenxa yezinto ezincinci, uhlala equmbile, kwaye ubonakala ekruqukile zizinto awayezithanda? Ezi zisenokungabi ziindlela eziqhelekileyo zokuziphatha kwabantwana. Njengabantu abadala, abantwana abancinci banokuba noxinzelelo, oluyingcinezelo yengqondo. Ukuyinyanga ngokufanelekileyo kunokuba yinto ebalulekileyo ebomini bomntwana bonke.
Sonke siyazi ukuba ubuntwana abusoloko buyinto evuyisayo. Iimvakalelo zabantwana zifana nolwandle olunezivuthuvuthu. Ulwandle oluzolileyo lunokuguquka ngequbuliso lube sisivuthuvuthu, luze lubuyele esiqhelweni ngokukhawuleza njengoko ilanga liphuma nomoya uvuthuza. Nangona kunjalo, ukudakumba akusiyo nje into eqhelekileyo yokutshintsha kweemvakalelo. Sisifo sokwenyani esinokuchaphazela nabantwana abancinci kakhulu.
Ingaba oku kubuhlungu nje? Okanye kukho into engaphezulu koko?
“Sisandula ukuqonda ukuba abantwana banokufumana uxinzelelo,” utshilo uDavid Fassler, ugqirha wengqondo wabantwana nabakwishumi elivisayo kwiYunivesithi yaseVermont. “Xa ndandisesikolweni sezonyango, malunga neminyaka engama-20 eyadlulayo, safundiswa ukuba abantwana abancinci abanakufumana uxinzelelo.”
Kodwa inyani yile, abantwana bayalufumana uxinezeleko. Ngokutsho kwe-American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, i-2% yabantwana kunye ne-4% ukuya kwi-8% yolutsha luchaphazeleka luxinezeleko.
Nangona le meko ixhaphakile kubantwana abancinci, ixhaphakile kakhulu kulutsha. Ngokutsho kwabaphandi, umntwana omnye kwabalishumi usenokuba nesifo sengqondo esinxulumene nokudakumba xa eneminyaka eli-16 ubudala.
Indlela uxinezeleko lobuntwana oluchaphazela ngayo ubomi bakho bonke
Ukudakumba kunokuba nemiphumo emibi nehlala ixesha elide ebomini bomntwana. Kunokuphazamisana nobomi bomntwana bentlalo, uphuhliso lweemvakalelo, kunye nomsebenzi wesikolo. Kunokukhokelela ekusebenziseni iziyobisi gwenxa.
“Ukuba umntwana akanyangwa, ukudakumba kwakhe kuhlala malunga neenyanga ezilithoba, nto leyo elingana nexesha lesikolo,” utshilo uFassler. “Kunzima kakhulu ukugqiba izifundo zakhe ezingafundwanga.”
Okwenza izinto zibe mbi ngakumbi kukuba, abo babeneengxaki zokudakumba ebuntwaneni nabo bayachaphazeleka kuko xa sele bekhulile. Olunye uphando lufumanise ukuba abantu abadala ababeneengxaki zokudakumba ebuntwaneni babenamathuba amaninzi okuba nembono engalunganga ngobomi kunabo babengenazo. Ngokufanelekileyo:
- Umvuzo wabo oqhelekileyo uphantsi.
- Inani labaphumelele eyunivesithi liphantsi.
- Amathuba okuba ungasebenzi aphezulu.
- Baninzi abantu abaxela iingxaki emsebenzini, kuluntu, nakubomi bentsapho.
Kwakhona, umntu owayene-depression esemncinci unamathuba aphindwe kabini okufumana i-depression xa emdala kunomntu ongazange abe ne-psychosis.
Kodwa eyona nto iphazamisayo kolu phando yayikukuba kukho amazinga aphezulu okuzibulala nokufa. Nangona kungekho kufa ngokuzibulala okuxeliweyo phakathi kwabo bangazange babe noxinzelelo ngexesha lokufikisa, i-7% yabantwana abanesifo soxinzelelo bazibulele, kwaye abanye abangama-34% bazama ukuzibulala.
Oku akuyonto ifanele ithathwe lula. Kuyaziwa ukuba abantwana abanengxaki yokudakumba basengozini enkulu yokuzibulala.
Uyibona njani ingcinezelo yomntwana?
Abazali banokuzibona ezi mpawu ngokunika ingqalelo kumntwana wabo. Ukuba enye okanye ezingaphezulu kwezi mpawu zikhona kumntwana ixesha elide, ngokuqinisekileyo kuya kufuneka ubone ugqirha (ugqirha) ukuze akunike ingcebiso.
| Uphawu | Kalula nje... |
|---|---|
| Ukuba nomsindo okanye ukucaphuka | Ndiba nomsindo kwaye ndilwe rhoqo kunangaphambili. |
| Usizi oluhlala luhleli kunye nokuphelelwa lithemba | Ndihlala ndilusizi, ndinobuso obuphantsi. Ndithetha ngokungathi akukho themba lanto. |
| Ukubekwa wedwa koluntu | Ubaphepha abahlobo kwaye ukhetha ukuhlala egumbini lakhe aze abe yedwa. |
| Uvakalelo oluphezulu xa ukwaliwa | Nokuba umntu uthetha into encinci, ifuna lukhulu entliziyweni kwaye ibuhlungu. |
| Utshintsho ekutyeni | Kungatya kancinci kakhulu, okanye ngaphezulu kakhulu. |
| Utshintsho ebuthongweni | Andikwazi ukulala, okanye ndilala kakhulu. |
| Ukukhwaza okanye ukukhala kakhulu | Ngequbuliso ndakhwaza ndaza ndalila ngaphandle kwesizathu. |
| Ubunzima bokugxila | Kunzima ukunikel’ ingqalelo kwizifundo zakho nakwizinto ozithethayo. |
| Ukudinwa kunye namandla aphantsi | Ndisoloko ndidiniwe kwaye andifuni kwenza nto. |
| Ukuziva ungento yanto okanye unetyala | Bathi izinto ezifana nokuthi “Andikhathali”, “Yonke into yimpazamo yam”. |
| Iingcinga malunga nokufa okanye ukuzibulala | Ukuthetha okanye ukubhala izinto ezinje ngokuthi "Ndingathanda ukuba ndifile." Olu luphawu olubi kakhulu. |
Ubunzima bezi mpawu benza unyango lube lubalulekile. Unyango lunokubandakanya unyango lwengqondo kunye/okanye amayeza okudakumba.
“Ngokwamava am, phantse bonke abantwana abanesifo sokudakumba bayazuza kunyango lomntu ngamnye,” utshilo uFassler. “Ngexesha abantwana befumana uncedo, iziphumo zesibini zokudakumba, ezinje ngokuzijongela phantsi kunye nobudlelwane obubi nosapho kunye nabahlobo, sele ziqalile ukuvela. Abantwana bafuna uncedo lokujongana nezo zinto. Amayeza awazisombululi ezo ngxaki.”
Ingaba uloyiko malunga namayeza luyinyani? (Impikiswano malunga nokudakumba)
Nangona bekukho impikiswano malunga namayeza okudambisa uxinzelelo ebantwaneni, ngo-2004 i-U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) yongeze isilumkiso esinamandla kwezi lebheli zamayeza. Oku kubizwa ngokuba "sisilumkiso sebhokisi emnyama." Yathi la mayeza kufuneka asetyenziswe ngononophelo kuba abonakalisiwe ukuba anyusa iingcinga zokuzibulala kunye nokuziphatha ebantwaneni nakubantu abaselula.
Injongo ye-FDA yayikukulumkisa oogqirha ukuba baqaphele imikhwa yokuzibulala kwiinyanga zokuqala zonyango, kodwa esi silumkiso senze okungaphezulu koko.
Nangona ukumiselwa kwale mithi kubantwana bekusanda kancinci ngaphambi kwesi silumkiso, ngo-2005, ukumiselwa kwale mithi kubantwana abangaphantsi kweminyaka eli-18 kwehle ngama-20%.
Ngoku ezinye iingcali zempilo yengqondo ziyoyika ukuba oku kunokuba nemiphumo emibi: ukuba kunokukhokelela ekwandeni kokuzibulala njengoko abazali noogqirha aboyikayo bephepha ukunika abantwana babo amayeza afunekayo.
“Ukuyeka ukudakumba kunganyangwa kuyingozi kakhulu kunokusela iyeza lokudakumba,” utshilo uJefferson Prince, MD, ugqirha wengqondo kwiSibhedlele iMassachusetts General.
Isilumkiso se-FDA sasisekelwe kuphononongo lwezifundo ezingama-24 ezibonise ukuba kwiinyanga ezine zokuqala zonyango, abantwana abathathe eli yeza babenamathuba aphindwe kabini okucinga okanye okuzama ukuzibulala kunabantwana abangazange balithathe eli yeza (i-placebo). Nangona kunjalo, akukho kufa kwabantu ngenxa yokuzibulala kwezo zifundo.
Kwelinye icala, olunye uphando lubonise ukuba yi-2% kuphela yabantwana kunye nabantu abakwishumi elivisayo abazibulalayo ababesebenzisa amayeza okudakumba ngexesha lokufa kwabo.
Ngoko ke, uMnu. Prince ucinga ukuba esi silumkiso sinokuba luncedo. Siye sazisa abantu ngengozi yokuzibulala kubantwana abanesifo soxinzelelo. Kwakhona kulungile ukuthetha ngokukhululekileyo neentsapho ngale nto.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Ukudandatheka kobuntwana akuyonto nje yokutshintsha kweemvakalelo, kodwa yimeko yokwenyani yempilo efuna unyango.
- Ukuba ubona utshintsho oluhlala ixesha elide kwindlela umntwana wakho aziphethe ngayo, alala ngayo, atya ngayo, okanye asebenzisana ngayo nabanye abantu, musa ukulutyeshela.
- Ukuba uyazibona iimpawu, qhagamshelana nogqirha ofanelekileyo ngoko nangoko ukuze akunike ingcebiso.
- Unyango lunokubandakanya iingcebiso, kwaye ukuba kuyimfuneko, amayeza. Musa ukoyika amayeza ngokungeyomfuneko. Ukungafumani unyango kuyingozi kakhulu.
- Nika umntwana wakho uthando, inkxaso, nokuqonda. Menze azive ngathi akayedwa.
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