Ingaba nawe uyoyika ukusondela komnye umntu uze uqale ubudlelwane? Masithethe ngeGamophobia!

Ngaba ngamanye amaxesha uvakalelwa ngolu hlobo? Ngaba uziva nje usoyika kwaye ungakhululekanga xa umntu ezama ukusondela kakhulu kuwe, okanye xa ubudlelwane budlula kakhulu? Okanye uyamangaliswa kancinci xa usiva ukuba umhlobo wakho uthembisene umtshato? Ukuba ezi zinto ziqhelekile kuwe, usenokuba unengxaki yesi simo ungaqondanga.

Yintoni iGamophobia?

Ngamafutshane, iGamophobia luloyiko olukhulu lokuzibophelela. Olu loyiko lunamandla kangangokuba ngamanye amaxesha kunokuba yinto engenakucingelwa ngabo banengxaki yesi sifo ukuba babe kulwalamano olude. Igama elithi 'Gamos' ligama lesiGrike elithetha 'umtshato'. Igama elithi 'Phobos' lithetha 'uloyiko'. Ngoko ke, xa ezi zimbini zidibana, iGamophobia iyakhiwa.

Nangona kunjalo, abanye abantu bayoyika ukuzibophelela kwizicwangciso zexesha elide, ezinje ngokukhetha iyunivesithi, umsebenzi, okanye indawo yokuhlala. Nangona kunjalo, olu loyiko lwahlukile kwi-gamophobia, oluyiloyiko lobudlelwane bomntu.

Yintoni enokwenzeka kumntu oneGamophobia?

Jonga ngoku ukuba unayo na kwezi mpawu. Umntu oneGamophobia unokufumana oku kulandelayo:

• Abakwazi ukwakha ubudlelwane bothando obuhlala ixesha elide nobunzulu. Basoloko bezama ukugcina ubudlelwane obungenamsebenzi.
• Xa usebudlelwaneni , uziva uxhalabile kakhulu. Uhlala uzibuza, 'Iza kuphela nini le nto?', 'Iza kundishiya?'
• Nokuba ndibona isibini esonwabileyo nesizinikeleyo , ndiziva ndothukile kwaye ndingonwabanga ngendlela engaqhelekanga.
• Bayabagxotha abantu abasondeleyo kubo, okanye baphelisa ubudlelwane ngequbuliso. Ngamanye amaxesha ngaphandle kwesizathu konke konke.

Yintoni iPhobia?

Sisandula ukuthetha ngeGamophobia. Ngoko ke lithetha ukuthini igama elithi 'Phobia'? I-phobia luhlobo oluqhelekileyo lwesifo sokuxhalaba . Kule nto, unoloyiko olukhulu okanye uloyiko lwezinto ezingenabungozi. I-Gamophobia ikwasisifo esithile sokungathandi . Oko kuthetha ukuba uyoyika imeko ethile: umtshato okanye ubudlelwane.

Ixhaphake kangakanani iGamophobia?

Kunzima ukutsho ngqo ukuba bangaphi abantu abane-phobia ethile efana ne-gamophobia. Abantu abaninzi bayayigcina le loyiko, okanye abazi nokuba banalo. Nangona kunjalo, uphando olwenziwe eMelika lubonisa ukuba umntu omnye kubantu abadala abali-10 kunye nomnye kubantu abatsha aba-5 baya kuba nayo le phobia ethile ngaxa lithile ebomini babo.

Ngubani osengozini enkulu yokuhlaselwa yiGamophobia?

Abanye abantu banokuba nale meko. Umzekelo, abantu abaneengxaki zobuntu ezifana neBorderline Personality Disorder (BPD) banokuphepha ubudlelwane ngenxa yokoyika kakhulu ukushiywa nokungafunwa. Basenokuba nobunzima bokuthemba abanye.

Kukho nezinye izinto ezininzi ezinobungozi:

• Imbali yosapho: Ukuba omnye wabazali bakho okanye umntu omthandayo ukhe waba nesifo sokoyika okanye sokuxhalaba, nawe usenokuba noloyiko lwento efanayo. Njengokuba abantwana befumana izifo ezithile kubazali babo.
• Isini: Kufunyaniswe ukuba abafazi banamathuba amaninzi okuba neentloni ezithile kunamadoda.
• Izizathu zemfuza: Uphando lokuqala lubonisa ukuba abanye abantu banotshintsho lwemfuza oluyandisa umngcipheko wokuba nexhala okanye uloyiko. Oku kuthetha ukuba kusenokwenzeka ukuba yinto eyenzeka kwiimfuza zakho.

Ziziphi ezinye iintloni ezinxulumene noloyiko lokuzibophelela?

Amaxesha amaninzi, umntu unokuba neentloni ezingaphezu kwesinye. Ngokwesiqhelo, ezi ntloni zinento efanayo. Umzekelo, umntu owoyika ukuzibophelela unokuba nezinye iintloni ezifana nezi:

• I-Philophobia: Ithetha uloyiko lothando.
• I-Pistanthrophobia: Uloyiko lokuthemba abanye okanye ukwenzakaliswa ngumntu omthandayo.
• I-Genophobia: Uloyiko lwesenzo sokwabelana ngesondo okanye ukusondelelana ngokwesondo.
• Ukoyika ukushiywa: Ukoyika rhoqo ukuba umntu uza kukulahla.

Kutheni ndisoyika kangaka ukuzibophelela? Zithini izizathu?

Abantu abaninzi bathi uloyiko lwabo lokuzibophelela, okanye umtshato, lubangelwa ngamava abo abuhlungu kwixesha elidlulileyo. Enyanisweni, i-gamophobia isenokuba yindlela yokukhusela ingqondo yakho eyiphuhlisileyo ukuze ikukhusele. Cinga ngayo, ukuba awuzibophelelanga kubudlelwane bexesha elide, awuyi kuva nentlungu.

Nazi ezinye izizathu ezinokubangela iGamophobia:

• Ukungavisisani kwabazali: Abantwana abaye babona iingxabano zabazali babo, iingxabano, okanye uqhawulo-mtshato olubuhlungu banokoyika ukungena kubudlelwane obuza kubangela iingxaki njengoko bekhula. Umzekelo, uNilanthi wayebabona abazali bakhe besilwa ngalo lonke ixesha esengumntwana. Ekugqibeleni, bahlukana. Ngoku, nokuba umntu uzama ukusondela kuNilanthi, uyoyika, ezibuza, 'Ngaba ubomi bam buza kuba njengobukaMama?'
• Intlungu ebuhlungu yangaphambili:Abantu abadala abaye benzakaliswa kukwahlukana, uqhawulo-mtshato, okanye ukungathembeki banokoyika ukuphinda babe kunye. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, olu khetho lunokuba luloyiko. Khawucinge nje, uKasun wenzakaliswe kakhulu luthando lwakhe lokuqala. Emva koko wagqiba kwelokuba akasayi kuphinda asondele kangako nakubani na. Ngoku luloyiko kuye.
• Uloyiko lokuphoswa (FOMO): Abanye abantu bayoyika, "Ukuba ndizibophelela kulo mntu, ngaba ndiza kuphoswa kukufumana umntu ongcono?" Yiyo loo nto bengazibopheleleli nakubani na.
• Iimpembelelo zenkcubeko okanye zonqulo: Ezinye iinkcubeko zikhuthaza imitshato elungiselelweyo ngaphandle kokuqwalasela uthando okanye iimvakalelo. Ukuba awukhethi iqabane lakho, ungoyika ukuzinikela ngokupheleleyo kubudlelwane. Kwakhona, ukuba ulilungu loluntu lwe-LGBTQ+ , ungoyika ukutshata ukuba inkolo okanye inkcubeko yakho iyaphikisana nomanyano olunjalo.

Zithini iimpawu zeGamophobia?

Ukuba une-gamophobia, unokufumana iimpawu zomzimba ezifana nezi xa ucinga ngokulala nomntu:

• Ukuziva ngathi umzimba wakho uyabanda (ii-Pholes).
• Ukudinwa kunye nokuba nentloko ebuhlungu.
• Ukubila okugqithisileyo (i-Hyperhidrosis).
• Ukubetha kwentliziyo. Kuvakala ngathi isifuba sakho siyabetha ngamandla.
• Isicaphucaphu.
• Ubunzima bokuphefumla (i-Dyspnea).
• Ukungcangcazela okanye ukungcangcazela.
• Isisu esibuhlungu okanye ukungagayi kakuhle kokutya (i-Dyspepsia).

Ungayibona njani iGamophobia?

Oogqirha basebenzisa uvavanyo lwempilo yengqondo ukufumanisa i-gamophobia. Akukho vavanyo lucacileyo lwayo. Ugqirha wakho uza kukubuza ngeempawu zakho, imbali yakho yempilo yengqondo, kunye nokuba unazo ezinye ii-phobias. Banokukuthumela kwingcali yezempilo yengqondo egxile kwii-phobias kunye neengxaki zokuxhalaba.

Ungayoyisa njani uloyiko lokuzibophelela? Zithini iindlela zonyango?

Le yeyona nto ibalulekileyo. Kukho iindlela zokoyisa olu loyiko. Abantu abaninzi bafumanisa ukuba uhlobo lwe-psychotherapy olubizwa ngokuba yi -Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) lubanceda boyise uloyiko lwabo lokuzibophelela. I-CBT isebenza ngokuchonga izizathu ezisisiseko zoloyiko lwakho lokuzibophelela nokutshintsha ezo ngcinga. Ingcali yezonyango ingakunceda utshintshe ezi mbono zimbi zibe ziimbono ezilungileyo malunga nokuzibophelela nomtshato. Ungafunda nendlela yokuthetha nabantu obathandayo ngale phobia.

"Khumbula, i-CBT ifana nomhlobo ochonga iipatheni zengcinga eziphazamisayo engqondweni yakho aze akuncede uzihlele."

Enye indlela yonyango yiSystemic Desensitization Therapy . Olu luhlobo lonyango lokuchasana nabantu . Lubonakalisiwe ukuba lunceda abantu abaninzi ukuba boyise iiphobias ezithile.

Unyango lokuvezwa:

• Uza kufundiswa ukulawula iimpawu zakho usebenzisa iindlela zokuphumla ezifana nokuzilolonga ngokuphefumla nzulu kunye nokucamngca.
• Kancinci kancinci, kancinci kancinci ufumanisa ingcamango yokwakha ubuhlobo. Oko kuthetha ukuba awucelwa ukuba wenze into enkulu ngaxeshanye, uqala ngamanyathelo amancinci.
• Uza kunikwa imisebenzi yokwenyani ukukunceda woyise uloyiko lwakho lokuzibophelela kubudlelwane bexesha elide.

Ziziphi iingxaki ezinokubakho zeGamophobia?

Ukuzikhwebula rhoqo kubantu obathandayo nokuphepha ubudlelwane kunokuba nefuthe elibi kwimpilo yakho yomzimba neyengqondo. Usenokuhlangabezana neemeko ezifana nezi:

• Ukudandatheka kunye neengcinga zokuzibulala.
• Ukungasebenzi kakuhle kwe-erectile (kumadoda)
• Ukuxhalaba kunye nokuhlaselwa luloyiko.
• Ingxaki yokusebenzisa iziyobisi. Abanye abantu bajika baye kwiindlela ezingalunganga ukuze babaleke kolu loyiko.

Ndifanele ndimbone nini ugqirha?

Ukuba ufumana nayiphi na kwezi zinto, qiniseka ukuba ubona ugqirha:

• Ukuba ukuhlaselwa luloyiko kwenzeka.
• Ukuba unexhala elingapheliyo eliphazamisana nobomi bemihla ngemihla okanye ubuthongo.
• Ukuba kukho iimpawu zokudakumba okanye iingxaki zokusebenzisa iziyobisi gwenxa .

Ndingayibuza yiphi imibuzo ugqirha wam?

Xa usiya kugqirha, kungcono ukubuza imibuzo efana nale:

• Yintoni ebangela ukuba ndibe nale phobia?
• Yeyiphi indlela engcono yonyango kum?
• Ngaba kufuneka ndifune unyango lwengqondo?
• Kuza kufuneka ndifumane unyango ixesha elingakanani?
• Ngaba kufuneka ndixhalabele iingxaki?

Okokugqibela, khumbula oku (Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya)

Kuqhelekile ukuba sonke sibe namathandabuzo kunye nokuthandabuza (okwaziwa ngokuba 'ziinyawo ezibandayo') xa singena kubudlelwane. Nangona kunjalo, kumntu one-gamophobia, olu loyiko lunokuba nzulu kangangokuba lunokumenza angakwazi ukuzikhusela. Oku kuthetha ukuba uloyiko luyamthintela ekuqhubeleni phambili ubudlelwane bakhe aze akhe ubudlelwane obuqinileyo nabanye.

Ukuba wakhe wenzakala ngaphambili, i-gamophobia inokuba yindlela yokuzikhusela ekudluleni kwintlungu efanayo kwakhona. Kodwa khumbula, inokoyiswa. Ingcali yezonyango inokukunceda woyise olu loyiko. Ekuhambeni kwexesha, nawe unokuba kulwalamano olonwabileyo noluzinzileyo. Ungaze woyike ukucela uncedo. Awuwedwa.

I- Gamophobia, uloyiko lokuzibophelela, uloyiko lomtshato, ixhala, i-phobia, unyango lwengqondo