Kua whara katoa tātou i tētahi i tētahi wā o ō tātou oranga, kāore? I ētahi wā ka puta noa mai i te kore whakaaro, i ētahi wā rānei ka pouri koe ki tētahi mea i kōrerotia e koe, i mahia rānei e koe i te wā e riri ana koe. Ina kite koe kua pakaru te whakawhirinaki o tētahi i roto i ō kupu, i ō mahi rānei, ko te tuku whakapāha pono te mahi tika. Ahakoa he mahi iti noa iho, he mea nui mō te rangimārie o tō hinengaro, mō te pupuri hoki i ngā whanaungatanga hauora, pumau.
Āhea koe me whakapāha?
Kia tirohia ngā āhuatanga e kore e taea te whiriwhiri i te whakapāha. Kaua e whakaroa, kaua hoki e whakaroa ina puta mai ēnei āhuatanga:
- Ina whara koe, ina whakatoi, ina kanga, ina hamama, ina kore whakaute rānei koe i tētahi . Mēnā i kōrero koe i tētahi kōrero kore whakaaro i whakapataritari i tētahi hoa, i riri rānei koe, ā, i hamama koe, me whakapāha koe.
- Ina pakaru, ina ngaro rānei ngā taonga a tētahi i a koe, ahakoa i nama koe i tētahi pene, ā, i ngaro, i taka rānei tētahi o ā rātou, me te kī, "Aroha mai, nāku te he."
- Ina hē tāu mahi ki tētahi, ina kino rānei tāu mahi . I ētahi wā, ka riri tātou nā te ahotea, nā te pēhanga rānei o waho. Ki te mōhio koe i hē tāu mahi, he mea nui te whai kawenga mō taua whanonga.
- Ina hē koe me te mōhio . Kei roto i tēnei ko te teka, te hora i ngā kōrero pakiwaitara, te tuku kōrero kino ki te ipurangi, te takahi ā-whakaaro rānei i tētahi oati, i tētahi ture rānei. Ka puta he kino nui i ēnei mahi.
- Ki te kore koe e whai i tētahi oati . Hei tauira, ki te takahi koe i tētahi oati, ki te kore rānei koe e tae mai i te wā i whakaritea ai, ko te tango i te kawenga he tohu i te ngākau pono.
He mea nui te kī "Aroha mai" i ēnei wā, nā te mea e whakaatu ana kei te whakaae koe ki te tango i te kawenga mō āu mahi.
He uaua te whakapāha? He aha ai?
Ehara i te mea ngāwari te whakaae ki tētahi mea kāore koe e whakahīhī ana. I ētahi wā ka whakaaro tātou, "Ka whakaaro noa ahau kāore i tupu," "Kua wareware pea te tangata kē." Heoi, ko te whakapāha te huarahi pai rawa atu .
Ko te arai matua ko tō tātou whakapehapeha . Ko te whakaae "i hē ahau" ka rite ki te whiu i te whakapehapeha o te tangata. E whakapono ana ētahi mā te whakapāha ka āhua ngoikore rātou, engari he whakaaro hē tēnā. He nui te kaha me te ngākau mahaki e hiahiatia ana hei whakaae i tētahi hapa. Ko tētahi atu wehi ko te kore pea e murua ō hara e te tangata kē, kei kino haere rānei te āhuatanga. Heoi, mā te huna i tō hapa ka kino noa iho te āhua i te wā roa.
He aha ngā painga o te whakapāha?
Ina tuku whakapāha koe i roto i te ngākau pono, he hohonu ngā hua pai:
- He āwhina ki te hanga me te pupuri i ngā whanaungatanga: Mā te whakapāha e whakaatu kei te whakanui koe i ngā kare ā-roto o te tangata. He āwhina ki te hanga anō i te whakawhirinakitanga kua pakaru . Pērā i te whakatika i te karāhe pakaru, ka taea te whakatika i te hononga, ahakoa he āhua rerekē i tō mua.
- E whakaatu ana i tō ngākau pono: Mā te whakaae ki ō hapa ka whakaatu i tō ngākau pono — tō pono me tō āhua matatika. Mā tēnei ka nui ake te whakaute o ētahi atu ki a koe.
- Ka kawea mai he rangimārie hinengaro: He taumaha te pikaunga o te hara. Mā te whakapāha ka māmā ake taua kawenga, ka whakamarie i te hinengaro mōu me te tangata kē atu. He tino painga tēnei mō tō Hauora Hinengaro , ka whakaiti i te pouri me te whakapai ake i te kounga o te moe.
- He tauira pai tēnei: Mā te mātakitaki i a koe, ka ako ētahi atu ki te whakapāha. Ka noho koe hei tauira mō āu tamariki me te hunga he iti iho i a koe.
- He āwhina i te whakatau tautohe : Mā te whakapāha e aro ki tētahi take iti, ka ārai i taua take kei tupu hei tautohe nui, kino hoki.
Ki te kī māmā noa iho, ehara te whakapāha i te kī kei te "hinga koe". Engari ko te tikanga he nui ake tō whakaaro ki te whanaungatanga me ngā kare ā-roto o te tangata i tō ake whakapehapeha. Koinei te atawhai tangata tūturu.
Me pēhea te whai hua o te whakapāha?
He rite tonu te hiranga o te mōhio *me pēhea* te whakapāha ki te mahi i taua mea. Me whakauru ngā mahi e whai ake nei ki tētahi whakapāha pono, ngākau nui hoki:
1. Whakaatuhia te pouri pono: Me kī mārama, "E pouri ana ahau mō aku kupu/i mahi." Whakaaetia te hapa, ahakoa kāore i te āta whakaarohia.
- Tauira: "E Nimal, pouri rawa atu ahau mō te hamama ki a koe i tētahi atu rā. E mōhio ana ahau i mamae koe. Tēnā koa murua mai ahau."
2. Tangohia te kawenga katoa me te kore e rapu kupu whakamārama: Mā te whakamahi i ngā kīanga pēnei i te "Aroha mai, engari i riri ahau i a koe" ka whakakorea te whakapāha.
- Tauira kino: "Aroha mai, engari kāore i tika kia whakapataritari koe i ahau." Āta karohia tēnei! Ka nui ake te pakanga.
- Tauira pai: "E mōhio ana ahau kāore i tika kia kōrero pēnā ahau. Kāore he whakamārama, ā, nōku katoa te he."
3. Whakaatuhia te aroha: Whakaaetia te pānga o tāu mahi ki te tangata kē.
- Tauira: "E mōhio ana ahau he tino mamae rawa atu taku kata ki a koe. Kāore au i te whakaaro noa, ā, e mihi ana ahau."
4. Whakaū ki te huringa: Whakaū atu ki a rātou ka ngana koe kia kaua e mahi anō i te whanonga.
- Tauira: "Ka nui ake taku aro ki aku kupu ā muri ake nei. Ka oati ahau ki te mahi pai ake."
5. Kia poto: Me tika tonu ki te kaupapa. Kāore koe e hiahia ki tētahi whakamārama roa, koretake. Ko te pono te mea nui.
Āta karohia ēnei hapa noa i te wā e whakapāha ana!
- "Aroha mai mēnā i pērā ō whakaaro": He maha ngā wā ka huri te whakapae i tēnei rerenga kōrero, e tohu ana kāore koe e whakaae ana ki te he, engari e kī ana kei te nui rawa te whakaaro o te tangata, kei te aro nui rawa rānei.
- Te rapu whakamārama me te "engari...": Ko te kī "Aroha mai, ko koe te mea i riri ai ahau" ehara i te whakapāha; he whakapae.
- Te akiaki kia murua te hara: Kia oti te whakapāha, hoatu he wā ki te tangata kia mārama ai ia. Kaua e akiaki i a ia mā te kī atu, "Āe, āe, kati te riri inaianei?"
- Whakapāha tinihanga, whakapāha karetao rānei: Ki te kore e puta mai i te ngākau, ka rongo te tangata. Tirohia ōna kanohi , ka whakapāha pono.
Ka whakatikahia tonutia ngā mea katoa i muri i te whakapāha?
Kei te āhuatanga, te kaha o te hapa, me te āhua o tō whanaungatanga tēnei. I ētahi wā, ka ea pea ngā mea i te wā tonu ka mea koe "Aroha mai," ā, ka murua tonutia koe e te tangata kē. He mea noa ake tēnei mō ngā māramatanga iti.
Heoi, he maha ngā wā ka roa te wā e memeha ai te mamae, te riri, me te pouri . He mea noa tēnei. He roa te wā e ora ai ngā kino i puta mai i ngā hapa nui, i te pakaru rānei o te whakawhirinaki. Me hoatu pea he wāhi ki a rātou, me tuku hoki i a rātou kia noho tahi me ō rātou kare ā-roto. Mēnā kua whakapāha pono koe, ka kitea e koe te rangimārie i te mōhio kua mahia e koe tō wāhanga ki te whakatika i ngā mea.
I ētahi wā, kāore pea te whanaungatanga e tino hoki ki tōna āhua o mua, inā koa kua tino pakaru te whakawhirinaki. Heoi anō, mā te whakapāha ka ārai i te kino haere o te āhuatanga, ā, ka taea hoki te hoatu he whakamarie ā-roto ki a koe.
Me aha koe mēnā ka whakapāha mai tetahi ki a koe?
Ina whakapāha mai tetahi ki a koe, kua rite pea koe ki te muru i a rātou, ka neke atu tonu atu. He whakautu whakamiharo tēnā, nā te mea ka māmā ake te taumahatanga o tōu ake ngākau.
Heoi, i ētahi wā, kāore pea koe i te rite ki te hoki tonu ki te whanaungatanga tata ki taua tangata.He mea noa anō hoki tēnā, inā koa mēnā i tino mamae koe, mēnā rānei he tikanga tō te tangata ki te whara i a koe i ngā wā katoa.
Ki te mea ka whara tonu tetahi i a koe, ka whakapāha, kātahi ka mahi anō i taua hapa, tērā pea ka whakatau koe kāore koe e hiahia ana ki te noho tahi me rātou. Nāu te whiriwhiri, ā, kāore he he o tēnā. Kei a koe te tika ki te tiaki i tō oranga.
Ina whakapāha mai tetahi, ina whakaae rānei koe ki tētahi whakapāha, ehara i te mea e whakaae ana koe ki ā rātou mahi. Heoi anō, kāore koe e herea kia tata atu ki tētahi nā te mea i whakapāha mai rātou. Ka taea e koe te whakaae ki tā rātou whakapāha i a koe e whakatau ana mēnā ka neke whakamua koe i roto i te whanaungatanga. Ko te murunga hara he tuku i te taumahatanga i roto i tōu ake ngākau kia kitea ai te rangimārie, ehara i te mea he whakatika i te hapa a te tangata kē. I ētahi wā, ahakoa i muri i te murunga hara, he pai ake te noho tawhiti mō tō hauora hinengaro.
Nā, he aha ngā mea tino nui e puta mai ana i tēnei?
Mai i tā tātou kōrero, ka kite koe i te hiranga o te mahi whakapāha. Kia maumahara tātou ki ēnei kōrero:
- Ehara te whakapāha i te ngoikore; he tohu ia o te kaha me te tangata: E hiahiatia ana te ngākau nui me te ngākau mahaki ki te whakaae i ō hapa me te tono murunga hara.
- Mā te whakapāha pono ka whakakaha ake ngā whanaungatanga: He mea nui ēnei hei hanga anō i te whakawhirinaki me te pupuri i ngā whakahoahoa me ngā hononga whānau.
- Kaua e rapu kupu whakamāori; me whai kawenga: Whakaaetia katoatia āu mahi. Whakapāha mai me te kore e whakamahi i te kupu "engari".
- Kia mārama ki ngā kare ā-roto o te tangata (Whakaatu Aroha ): Whakaarohia te pānga o āu mahi ki a rātou, me te whakapuaki i taua māramatanga.
- Kia manawanui i muri i te whakapāha: Hoatu te wā ki te tangata kia ora ai rātou. Kaua e akiaki i a rātou.
- Mā te murunga hara ka tau te rangimārie o te hinengaro: He rite ki te tuku i tētahi kawenga taumaha—he koha ka hoatu e koe ki a koe anō.
Ko te whakapāha me te muru hara he pūkenga nui e rua mō tō hauora hinengaro me ō hononga pāpori . Mā te whakamahi i ēnei ka āwhina i a koe me te hunga e karapoti ana i a koe kia noho harikoa, kia noho rangimārie hoki. Nō reira, kaua e wehi ki te whakapāha ina hē koe, ā, ngana ki te whakaae ki ngā whakapāha me te ngākau tuwhera ina tukuna atu ki a koe.
Murunga hara, Whakapāha, Aroha, Hapa, Whanaungatanga, Hoahoa, Hauora Hinengaro
