Xa sisiva igama elithi "uxinzelelo," asicingi ukuba yindlela entle, akunjalo? Kodwa uyazi, ngamanye amaxesha uxinzelelo oluncinci lulungile. Cinga ngaloo ntwana yoloyiko ixutywe novuyo oluvayo xa uqala umsebenzi omtsha okanye ubudlelwane obutsha. Olu hlobo loxinzelelo lusinika amandla nomdla wokujongana nemingeni nokuzama izinto ezintsha. Lukwasinceda ukuba senze ngokukhawuleza kwiimeko eziyingozi.
Kodwa olu xinzelelo lulungileyo aluhlali ixesha elide. Lukunika amandla owadingayo okomzuzwana, luze luphele. Kodwa ukuba uxinezeleko ixesha elide, lunokuba nzima ukulunyamezela kwaye lukuchaphazele ngokwasemzimbeni nangokwengqondo. Ngamafutshane, nangona impendulo yomzimba wethu kuxinzelelo isebenza kakuhle kwixesha elifutshane, ukuba lusebenza ixesha elide, yonke inkqubo yethu ayinakuyinyamezela.
Luluphi ulwalamano phakathi koxinzelelo kunye nokudakumba?
Uxinzelelo lwexesha elide, esilubiza ngokuba luxinzelelo olungapheliyo , lunokukhokelela kwinto enzulu ngakumbi, uxinezeleko. Uxinzelelo sisifo sengqondo esikwenza uzive ulusizi ngalo lonke ixesha kwaye ungabi namdla kwizinto obuzithanda. Uxinzelelo lunokuchaphazela nomnqweno wakho wokutya, ukulala, kunye nokukwazi kwakho ukugxila.
Okumangalisayo kukuba oku kusebenza ngendlela eyahlukileyo. Oko kukuthi, ukudakumba nako kunokubangela uxinezeleko.
Iingcali zithi ubudlelwane phakathi koxinzelelo kunye nokudakumba "bubhekisa kwicala elinye." Oko kukuthi, enye inokubangela enye, kwaye enye inokubangela eyokuqala. Zombini zinokwenza imeko ibe mandundu.
Indlela uxinezeleko olubangela ngayo uxinzelelo icacile. Khawucinge nje, ukuba uxinezeleko, ubomi bakho bonke buyaphazamiseka. Uzama ukuhlala kude noluntu, ukuba wedwa. Uyeka ukunxulumana nabahlobo, ukuya emsebenzini, esikolweni, nazo zonke izinto obuqhele ukuzenza ukuze wonwabe. Xa uziva unesizungu ngolu hlobo, uxinzelelo oluvayo luyanda, akunjalo? Yiyo loo ndlela uxinezeleko olubangela ngayo uxinzelelo.
Kwaye kukho ubungqina obaneleyo bokuba elinye icala lale nto nalo liyinyani. Ingxaki enkulu, njengoqhawulo-mtshato okanye ingxaki enkulu yezemali, iyinto enkulu ebangela uxinzelelo. Isenza singacingi kakuhle. Xa uxinzelelo lukhula ngolu hlobo, kwenzeka into ethile. Rhoqo, loo nto yingxaki yokudakumba.
Kodwa akukacaci ngokupheleleyo ukuba uxinzelelo lubangela njani ukudakumba. Kodwa kuyacaca ukuba uxinzelelo lwexesha elide luyandisa amathuba okudakumba. Umzekelo, ukuxhaphaka koxinzelelo phakathi kolutsha kuye kwanda kakhulu emva kobhubhane we-Covid. Oku kucingelwa ukuba kungenxa yokuzihlukanisa nabantu, ukuphazamiseka kwendlela eqhelekileyo yobomi, kunye noxinzelelo ngokubanzi malunga nemfundo nomsebenzi.
Senza ntoni ukuze siwuphelise lo mjikelo woXinzelelo-uXinzelelo?
Ngamanye amaxesha, ukwenza utshintsho oluncinci kwindlela esiphila ngayo kunokunceda ekupheliseni lo mjikelo unzima woxinzelelo kunye nokudakumba. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukucamngca ngendlela eyakhayo malunga nendlela ojongana ngayo noxinzelelo.
Inyathelo elibalulekileyo kukucinga, "Kulungile, ndiza kwenza into ethile ukujongana nale nto," endaweni yokucinga, "Ndixinezelekile, ndiza kuba nokudakumba ngoku." Musa ukuhlala nje ucinga, "Ndiza kunyamezela le nto."
Nazi ezinye zezinto ezinokukunceda:
| Isenzo | Yintoni omawuyenze kwaye kutheni ibalulekile? |
|---|---|
| Ukuzilolonga. | Ukuzilolonga imizuzu engama-30 ngosuku, iintsuku ezi-5 ngeveki, kwanele ukwenza umahluko omkhulu. Izinto ezifana nokuhamba kunye neyoga zinokunceda ukuzola ingqondo nokunciphisa uxinzelelo. |
| Kuphephe ukutya kakhulu nokusela. | Nangona ezi zinokubangela isiqabu sexeshana, aziyi kunceda ekuhambeni kwexesha. Ukongeza ekubeni yingozi emzimbeni, ungaziva unetyala ngawe kamva. Ukusela utywala kakhulu kuyaphazamisa ubuthongo. |
| Nciphisa i-caffeine. | I-caffeine, efumaneka kwikofu, kwiiti ezithile, nakwiisoda, inokukwenza uxhalabe ngokungeyomfuneko kwaye yonyuse uxinezeleko. Yehlisa ezi zinto kangangoko unako. |
| Kuphephe ukutshaya. | Yintsomi enkulu ukuba ukutshaya icuba kunciphisa uxinzelelo. I-Nicotine inokunika uxolo lwexeshana, kodwa ihlala ixesha elifutshane. Emva koko, xa iphela, iminqweno iyanda, nto leyo ekhokelela kuxinzelelo olungakumbi. |
| Zenzele ixesha. | Yenza izinto ozithandayo, ezikwenza wonwabe. Funda incwadi, mamela ingoma, bukela imuvi. Gxila kwizinto okwaziyo ukuzenza kakuhle. |
| Ziphephe izinto ezibangela uxinezeleko. | Ukuba uyazi ukuba kukho into okanye umntu okubangela uxinezeleko, zama ukuyiphepha loo meko okanye loo mntu kangangoko unako. |
| Lala kamnandi ebusuku. | Qinisekisa ukuba ingqondo nomzimba wakho ziyafumana ukuphumla ezikudingayo. Kucetyiswa ukuba umntu omdala alale iiyure ezisi-7-9 ngosuku. |
Ukuba udandathekile, eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukususa iimvakalelo zokuphelelwa lithemba zokuba ‘kungakhathaliseki ukuba ndenza ntoni na, ayinamsebenzi.’ Oko akuyonyani. Nezinto ezincinci ozenzayo zinokwenza umahluko omkhulu.
Cela uncedo, musa ukubandezeleka wedwa.
Enye indlela entle yokunciphisa imiphumo yoxinzelelo kunye nokudakumba kukungazami ukujongana nezi zinto wedwa. Ubudlelwane obuqinileyo nobuxhasanayo bunokwenza umahluko omkhulu.
Ukudakumba yimeko yokuba wedwa nokuba wedwa. Ngoko ke eyona nto ingcono onokuyenza kukufumana indlela yokuphinda uqhagamshelane. Ukuthetha nomhlobo okanye ababini othembekileyo kubaluleke kakhulu.
Ukuthetha nabahlobo bakho kunye nosapho lwakho kunokukunceda uqonde ngcono ukuba yintoni ebangela uxinzelelo lwakho. Linyathelo elikhulu elo phambili.
Endaweni yokuthi nje, "Ndixinezelekile," kunceda kakhulu ukuchonga izinto ezithile ezikukhathazayo nezichaphazela ubomi bakho. Kuluncedo kakhulu ukuba nomntu onokuthetha naye ngaloo nto.
Ngamanye amaxesha, eyona nto inceda kakhulu kukuthetha ngento ekucingayo nomntu ophulaphula ngenyameko, endaweni yokuxelelwa ukuba “yenza oku, yenza okuya.”
Ukufumana uncedo lweengcali
Ukuba ukuthetha nabahlobo kunye nosapho akuncedi, ungafuna uncedo lweengcali . Oko kuthetha ukubona ugqirha uze uthethe ngako. Angakuthumela kwingcali yezengqondo okanye kumcebisi ukuba kuyimfuneko.
Enye indlela yokunyanga oku yi -cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT).. Ngamafutshane, le ndlela yonyango isebenza ngokutshintsha indlela esicinga ngayo kunye neendlela zokuziphatha, isinceda siphinde silawule ubomi bethu. Le ndlela ye-CBT isinceda sicinge, "Yeyiphi eyona nto incinci endinokuyenza namhlanje? Ndingayenza njani? Isiphumo siza kuba yintoni?" Ke ngoko, sisixhobo esihle sokufundisa kunye nendlela yonyango.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Uxinzelelo kunye nokudakumba zidibene. Enye inokubangela enye okanye yenze imeko ibe mandundu.
- Utshintsho olulula kwindlela yokuphila olufana nokuzilolonga, ukutya okunempilo, kunye nokulala ngokwaneleyo kunokubonelela ngesiqabu esikhulu.
- Musa ukulwa nale micimbi wedwa. Thetha nomhlobo okanye ilungu losapho olithembayo. Oko kunamandla kakhulu.
- Ukuba unengxaki yokuyilawula nokuba sele uthethe nosapho lwakho, ungathandabuzi ukuya kugqirha . Ukufuna uncedo lobuchwephesha akubonisi ubuthathaka, luphawu lokuzinceda.
- Unyango olufana nonyango lokuziphatha kwengqondo (i-CBT) luyindlela esebenzayo kakhulu yokulawula iingcinga zakho kunye nokuziphatha kwakho.
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