Ukuba unesifo sokudakumba, ugqirha wakho usenokuba ukunike amayeza okudakumba. Kodwa kuqhelekile ukuba abantu abaninzi bazive besoyika kwaye bethandabuza xa besiva ngala mayeza. Imibuzo efana nokuthi "Ngaba ndiza kutshintsha ukuba ndiwathatha?", "Ngaba ndiza kuba likhoboka lawo?", "Ngaba kuza kufuneka ndiwathathe ubomi bam bonke?" ifika engqondweni. Ngenxa yolu loyiko, abantu abaninzi abanokungenelwa ngokwenene kula mayeza bayathandabuza ukufuna unyango. Ngoko ke namhlanje, masithethe ngokulula, ngokungathi singabahlobo bakho, malunga noloyiko malunga nala mayeza nokuba ayinyani na okanye akunjalo.
Uloyiko oluqhelekileyo kunye nenyaniso malunga namayeza okudakumba
Ezi mithi zokudakumba zihlala zisetyenziswa kunye ne-psychotherapy ukunyanga uxinzelelo. Enyanisweni, abantu abane kwabalishumi abasebenzisa la mayeza bafumana uphuculo olukhulu kwidosi yokuqala. Ngamanye amaxesha, ukuba idosi yokuqala ayisebenzi, idosi yesibini okanye yesithathu phantse isoloko iphumelela. Kodwa ngenxa yeengcamango eziphosakeleyo abantu abanazo malunga nala mayeza, abantu abaninzi bayoyika ukuqala unyango. Makhe sijonge ezo loyiko nganye nganye.
| Uloyiko Oluqhelekileyo | Inyaniso |
|---|---|
| Uloyiko 1: La mayeza akwenza ulibale ngeengxaki, awakuncedi ukuzisombulula. | Inyani: La mayeza awayi kukwenza ulibale iingxaki zakho. Kodwa aya kukunika amandla engqondo kunye nokucaca okudingayo ukuze ujongane nazo. Uxinzelelo lunokukushiya uzive usasazekile kwaye ungenamandla okwenza nantoni na. Xa la mayeza ekunceda uzinze ingqondo yakho, uya kuba namandla okujonga iingxaki zakho ngendlela eyiyo kwaye uzisombulule. |
| Uloyiko 2: Ubuntu bam buza kutshintsha xa ndisela amayeza, ndiza kuba njengerobhothi (i-zombie). | Inyani: Xa zisetyenziswa ngokuchanekileyo, la mayeza awatshintshi ubuntu bakho. Abuyisela nje ubuntu bakho bakudala obabulahlekile ngenxa yoxinzelelo.Uza kuqala ukuziva ngathi ungumntu onjani kwakhona. Ezi azizo "iipilisi zovuyo." Amaxesha amaninzi, amanye amayeza anokubangela ukungakhathali. Ukuba oku kuyenzeka, thetha nogqirha wakho aze alungise umthamo okanye atshintshele kwelinye iyeza. |
| Uloyiko 3: Ndiza kukhula ndityebe ukuba ndithatha eli yeza. | Inyani: Ewe, oku kunokwenzeka. Njengazo zonke amayeza, kukho iziphumo ebezingalindelekanga. Ukunyuka kobunzima yenye yazo. Ezinye izidambisi-ntlungu zinokubangela ukwanda kobunzima, ngelixa ezinye zinokubangela ukwehla kobunzima. Ukuba unengxaki yobunzima, thetha nogqirha wakho ngayo ngokukhululekileyo . Angakunceda ukhethe amayeza afanelekileyo kuwe. |
| Uloyiko 4: Ukuba uqala ezi zinto, kuya kufuneka usele ubomi bakho bonke. | Inyani: Le yingcamango ephosakeleyo ngokupheleleyo. Umntu onesifo sokudakumba okokuqala ngqa kufuneka asebenzise eli yeza rhoqo kangangeenyanga ezi-6 ukuya kwezi-9. Asikuko ubomi bakhe bonke. Nje ukuba isifo sokudakumba silawulwe kakuhle ngamayeza, kufuneka uthethe nogqirha wakho kwaye unciphise umthamo kancinci kancinci ngokwemiyalelo yakhe ngaphambi kokuba uyeke . Ukuba uyeka ngequbuliso, unokufumana ukungakhululeki okufana neentloko ezibuhlungu, isiyezi, kunye nokugabha. |
| Uloyiko 5: Eli yeza liza konakalisa ubomi bam besondo. | Inyani: Ezinye iziyobisi zokudakumba zinokuchaphazela ukusebenza ngokwesondo. Ngokuqhelekileyo, kuxhomekeke kakhulu ekufumaneni ubunzima bokufikelela kwi-orgasm kunokunciphisa inkanuko yobulili. Kodwa khumbula, umnqweno wakho wesondo usenokuba wehlile kakhulu ngenxa yoxinzelelo ngokwalo . Ngoko ke wakuba usele amayeza kwaye uxinezeleko lwakho luphelile, ubomi bakho besondo bunokuba ngcono kunangaphambili. Ungathetha nogqirha wakho ngale nto kwaye ukhethe amayeza afanelekileyo kuwe. |
| Uloyiko 6: Olu luphawu lobuthathaka. | Inyani: Le yeyona ngcamango iphosakeleyo. Njengesifo seswekile okanye uxinzelelo lwegazi oluphezulu, ukudakumba yimeko yezonyango ebangelwa kukutshintsha kweekhemikhali engqondweni. Ukufuna unyango akubonisi ubuthathaka. Luphawu lomntu onamandla okhathaleleyo ngempilo yakhe . |
Luluphi ulwalamano phakathi kweengcinga zokuzibulala kunye namayeza okudakumba?
Le yingongoma eyoyikisayo neyinobuzaza kubantu abaninzi. Ezinye izifundo zakutshanje zibonise ukuba kusenokubakho umngcipheko omncinci wokucinga okanye ukuziphatha ngokuzibulala (kodwa kungekhona ukufa) phakathi kwabantwana, abakwishumi elivisayo, kunye nabantu abadala abaselula abasebenzisa la mayeza.
Ngenxa yesi sizathu, i-American FDA imisele ukuba la mayeza afake isilumkiso esifakwe ebhokisini kwiileyibhile zawo.
Ngoko ke kwenzeka ntoni ngokwenene?
Cinga ngale nto, kwiiveki zokuqala zokuqala usebenzisa eli yeza, kukho utshintsho oluthile oluvelayo njengoko umzimba uqhelana nalo. Ngeli xesha, ingakumbi kumntu oselula, kunokubakho ukuziva uxhalabile kwaye ungazinzi. Ndicinga ukuba le isenokuba yimbangela yeengcinga ezikhulayo.
Yiyo loo nto ugqirha wakho eza kufuna ukukubona rhoqo kwiiveki ezimbalwa zokuqala emva kokuba uqalise eli yeza. Kubalulekile ukumxelela ngalo naluphi na utshintsho olubonayo, nokuba luncinci kangakanani na.
Kodwa kukho elinye icala lemali. Olunye uphando olukhulu lufumanise ukuba izinga lokuzibulala eMelika lehle kakhulu emva kokuba iyeza elidumileyo i-fluoxetine (igama lebrendi iProzac) livele kwimarike.
Ngamafutshane, ukudakumba okukhulu okunganyangwanga kuyingozi kakhulu kuneengozi ezinokubakho ngala mayeza. Xa ukudakumba kulawulwa ngamayeza, iingcinga zokuzibulala zihlala zinyamalala kunye nako.
Eyona nto ibalulekileyo: Nokuba uneminyaka emingaphi, nokuba usebenzisa amayeza okanye awusebenzisi, ukuba ucinga ngokuzibulala, nceda uthethe nogqirha wakho ngayo ngoko nangoko. Ungathandabuzi ukuya kwigumbi likaxakeka esibhedlele (ETU) ukuba kuyimfuneko. Ukucela uncedo luphawu lokuba unamandla.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Ukudakumba akusosiphene. Yimeko yezonyango efuna unyango.
- Amayeza okudakumba awakutshintshi, ayakunceda ukuba ube nguwe kwakhona.
- Ayizizo zonke amayeza alungele wonke umntu. Ugqirha wakho uza kukunceda ufumane amayeza afanelekileyo kuwe. Ngoko ke thetha naye ngokukhululekileyo kwaye unyaniseke malunga neemvakalelo zakho.
- Landela imiyalelo kagqirha wakho rhoqo xa uqala naxa uyeka ukusebenzisa amayeza. Ungaze uyeke ukuwasebenzisa ngequbuliso.
- Musa ukoyika okanye ube neentloni ngokufuna unyango. Sesinye sezipho ezilungileyo onokuzinika zona.
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