Ngaba nawe uvakalelwa ngolu hlobo? Yonke into oyenzayo, ukususela kweyona incinci ukuya kweyona inkulu, kufuneka yenziwe ngokugqibeleleyo ngokupheleleyo. Ngaba uziva uthwele umthwalo onzima kunye netyala ukuba wenza impazamo encinci? Ukuba kunjalo, usenokuba unesifo sengqondo esibizwa ngokuba yi- 'Perfectionism '. Ngamafutshane, le yinkolelo eqinileyo yokuba yonke into oyenzayo kufuneka igqibelele, ngaphandle kweempazamo. Ukucinga ngale ndlela akulunganga kakhulu kwimpilo yakho yengqondo neyomzimba.
Uyazi njani ukuba ungumntu othanda ukugqibelela?
Uninzi lwethu lunokuba 'ngabantu abathanda ukugqibelela' ngandlela thile ebomini bethu. Mhlawumbi unjalo ekuphekeni, okanye mhlawumbi usemsebenzini wakho. Kodwa ukuba ufuna oku 'kugqibelela' kuyo yonke into oyenzayo, ngoko ke kunokwenzeka ukuba ube nale meko. Makhe sibone ukuba zeziphi iimpawu eziphambili.
- Ukulibazisa: Ukulibazisa ukuqala umsebenzi ngenxa yokoyika ukungakwazi ukuwugqiba ngaphandle kokwenza iimpazamo.
- Ukuthabatha ixesha elingeyomfuneko: Uthatha ixesha elide kakhulu ukwenza into efanayo kunabanye kuba awunalo ixesha lokwenza ' i-ECT epheleleyo'.
- Ukucinga kuphela ngesiphumo sokugqibela: Endaweni yokonwabela inkqubo, usebenza ucinga ngesiphumo sokugqibela kuphela.
- Ukungoneliseki: Uziva ngathi awukagqibi ngomsebenzi ude ucinge, "Oku kulungile ngoku."
Into ebalulekileyo kukuba 'ukuthanda ukugqibelela' akusiso isifo. Kodwa ukuba akulawuleki , kunokuba nefuthe elikhulu kwimpilo yakho yengqondo.
Ngaba kukho iintlobo eziphambili zokuthanda ukugqibelela?
Ewe, sithetha kakhulu ngeentlobo ezintathu zokuthanda ukugqibelela. Nangona kukho ukufana phakathi kwezi zinto, kukwakho nomahluko omncinci. Makhe sibone ukuba zeziphi ezi zinto kule theyibhile.
| Uhlobo lokuthanda ukugqibelela | Kalula nje... |
|---|---|
| Imilinganiselo yobuqu yokufuna ukugqibelela (ngokusekelwe kwimigangatho yomntu) | Oku kuluncedo kakhulu. Kuba uzibekela iinjongo eziphezulu kwaye unomdla wokuzifezekisa. Oku kwenza ukuba ungadandatheki kakhulu kwaye uxinezeleke. Nokuba abanye bathi, "Ezi ziinjongo ezinkulu kakhulu ukuba zingafezekiswa," kuya kukukhuthaza. |
| Ukufuna ukugqibelela ngokuzigxeka | Oku kuyingozi kancinci. Kule nto, uziva uloyiko kwaye uphelelwe lithemba, ngokungathi awusoze ukwazi ukufezekisa iinjongo zakho. Oku kunokukhokelela kwizinto ezifana neengxaki zokuxhalaba, uxinzelelo, ukuzibeka ityala, kunye nokuphepha umsebenzi. |
| Ukufuna ukugqibelela okumiselwe luluntu (okusekelwe kuxinzelelo oluvela kuluntu) | Okwenzekayo kweli tyala kukuba awukho phantsi koxinzelelo oluvela kuwe, kodwa luvela ngaphandle, lokuba 'wenze yonke into ngokugqibeleleyo'. Umzekelo, kwimisebenzi efana nogqirha okanye igqwetha, neyona mpazamo incinci ayinakwenziwa. Kwakhona, uxinzelelo oluvela kwabanye abazali kunye noluntu lunokuba sisizathu soku. |
Iziphumo zempilo zokufuna ukugqibelela
Uphando lufumanise ukuba ukuthanda izinto ngendlela egqibeleleyo kunxulunyaniswa neengxaki ezininzi zempilo yengqondo. Makhe sijonge ukuba zeziphi ezi ziphumo.
- Iingxaki zempilo yengqondo :
- Ukudinwa (ukudinwa engqondweni nasemzimbeni okubangelwa kukusebenza kakhulu)
- Uxinzelelo
- Uxinzelelo
- Ixhala
- Iingcinga zokuzibulala
- Iingcinga nezenzo ezingafunekiyo ( i-Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder - i-OCD)
- Iingxaki zokutya
- Iingxaki ezinxulumene nendlela yokuphila:
- Ukuzijongela phantsi
- Ukudana
- Ukuhlehliswa komsebenzi
- Iingxaki kubudlelwane phakathi kwabantu
Kutheni sinolu 'thando lokugqibelela'?
Kunzima ukukhomba isizathu esinye soku. Zininzi izizathu. Makhe sijonge ezona ziphambili.
- Uloyiko olugqithisileyo lokungaphumeleli.
- Imfuneko enamandla yokukholisa abazali okanye abantu abadala.
- Umnqweno wokufumana uthando nokwamkelwa ngabanye.
- Ukuba nezinye iingxaki zempilo yengqondo ezifana nexhala kunye ne-OCD.
- Ukuziva ungaqinisekanga kwaye ungafaneleki ngawe.
- Iingxaki kubudlelwane nabazali ngexesha lobuntwana.
- Ukuba ngumntu obonakalise italente ephezulu ngexesha lesikolo okanye ulutsha.
Ngaba ikho indlela yokoyisa umnqweno wokugqibelela?
Ewe, ngokuqinisekileyo. Endaweni yokuzama ukujongana nale meko wedwa, kubalulekile ukubonana nengcali yezempilo yengqondo efanelekileyo, njengogqirha wengqondo okanye umcebisi ngogqirha wakho. Banokukunceda ufumane unobangela wengxaki yakho kwaye uqale unyango olufanelekileyo.
Kukho iindlela ezininzi zonyango eziphambili ezisetyenziswayo.
Unyango lokuqonda nokuziphatha (CBT)
Oku kukufundisa ukuba asikuko konke ekufuneka kugqibelele ngokupheleleyo. Kukufundisa ukuba iimpazamo ziqhelekile kwaye ungavumeli ukuba zikuthintele kuhambo lwakho.
Unyango lwe-hypnotherapy
Oku kunceda ukwahlukana nesimo sengqondo sokuba 'zonke okanye akukho nto'. Oku kunceda ukutshintsha esi simo sengqondo siqinileyo.
Unyango lweenkqubo zosapho
Kule nto, sijonga indlela umnqweno wokugqibelela owavela ngayo kusapho lwakho, nendlela owakuchaphazela ngayo njengomntu. Sisebenzisana namalungu osapho ukufumana izisombululo kule ngxaki.
Izinto onokuzizama wedwa
Ukongeza kwiingcebiso zonyango, kukho izinto ezininzi onokuzama ukuzilawula ngokwakho.
- Bhala phantsi izinto ezilungileyo nezingalunganga: Bhala phantsi encwadini izinto ezilungileyo nezingalunganga zokuba ngumntu othanda ukugqibelela. Xa uziva ngolo hlobo kwakhona, jonga ezo zinto zingalunganga uze wenze isigqibo.
- Zibekele iinjongo ezinokwenzeka: Zibekele iinjongo ezinokwenzeka onokuzifezekisa ngokwenene. Emva koko uya kuyeka ukudinwa kukusukela izinto ezingenakwenzeka.
- Beka ixesha elibekiweyo: Beka ixesha elifanelekileyo lomsebenzi ngamnye uze uzame ukuwugqiba ngelo xesha. Oku kuya kukuthintela ekuchitheni ixesha lakho ngokungeyomfuneko kwinto enye.
- Kuphephe ukulibazisa: Endaweni yokucinga ngesiphumo sokugqibela, yahlulahlula loo msebenzi ube ngamacandelo uze uqhubeke emva kokugqiba inxalenye enye. Ngale ndlela, akuyi kuziva uxinezelekile kakhulu.
- Yamkela iimpazamo: Khumbula ukuba iimpazamo azibi kangako. Enyanisweni, ungafunda kuzo. Endaweni yokuzicinga, zamkele njengenxalenye yobomi.
- Gxila kwezinye izinto: Endaweni yokuzama ukwenza into efanayo ibe ntle, chitha ixesha usenza izinto ezahlukeneyo ezikwenza wonwabe kwaye zibalulekile kuwe.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Ukufuna ukugqibelela akusisifo, kodwa yimeko yengqondo enokuthi ichaphazele kakubi impilo yakho yengqondo ukuba ayijongwanga.
- Iimpazamo ziyinxalenye yobomi. Qonda ukuba akufuneki yonke into ibe gqibelele ngokupheleleyo.
- Ukuba uziva uxinezelekile okanye uxhalabile ngale meko, kubaluleke kakhulu ukubona ugqirha kwaye ufumane ingcebiso kunokuba ubandezeleke wedwa.
- Zibekele usukelo olunokwenzeka, ungazilibazisi, zinike ixesha lezinto ezikwenza wonwabe. Yiba nobubele kuwe.
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