Xa umntu osondeleyo kuwe, mhlawumbi umyeni wakho, umfazi wakho, umntwana, umama, okanye utata wakho, esweleka ngequbuliso ngexesha elingacingelwanga... Intlungu oyivayo ayichazeki, akunjalo? Kuvakala ngathi ihlabathi liphela likuwele. Uqala njani ubomi bakho kwakhona emva komothuko omkhulu kangaka kunye nentlungu enganyamezelekiyo? Uvuka njani kwaye ubeke ingqondo yakho ikhululekile kwabanye? Namhlanje siza kuthetha ngezinto ezimbalwa ezinokukunceda ufumane loo mandla.
Amabali oomama abaguqula intlungu yaba ngamandla
Nangona la mabali evela koomama bamanye amazwe, intlungu ayazi ilizwe, uhlanga, okanye unqulo. Loo mvakalelo iqhelekile kuye wonke umntu. Kwaye kunjalo namandla umntu anawo okunqoba intlungu. Jonga indlela aba mama, emva kokulahlekelwa ngabayeni babo kuhlaselo lobugrogrisi olukhawulezileyo, abanyamezela ngayo loo ntlungu baza bamela abantwana babo kunye noluntu.
Ibali likaLaura: Ukumela Umntwana
ULaura wayenonyana oneminyaka emi-4 ubudala oneengxaki ezikhethekileyo, owaziwa ngokuba yi-autism, ogama linguWillie. ULaura nomyeni wakhe bamnyamekela uWillie kunye. Kodwa emva kokuba umyeni wakhe eswelekile ngequbuliso, uxanduva olupheleleyo lukaWillie lwaba semagxeni kaLaura.
Unyana wayekhathazekile kakhulu ngokufelwa nguyise. Wazilibala izinto awayezifundile noyise, umzekelo, indlela yokuya kwindlu yangasese eyedwa. Wayenethemba lokuba uyise uza kubuya. Ekubeni wayengakwazi ukuthetha, wayenokuqhubeka nje athi "lusizi" ngolwimi lwezandla.
Ngeli xesha, eyona nto ibalulekileyo uLaura awayefanele ayenze yayikukufaka unyana wakhe kwisikolo esilungileyo. Wakwenza oko, nangona kwakunzima kakhulu. Kancinci kancinci, unyana wakhe wachacha. Ngoku ukhumbula uyise ngovuyo. ULaura ngoku usebenza ekwakheni isikolo esikhethekileyo sonyana wakhe kunye nabanye abantwana abane-autism. Yayiliphupha lakhe nomyeni wakhe.
Xa ubeka ecaleni intlungu yakho uze wenze into ethile kumntu oxhomekeke kuwe, loo nto ngokwayo iba ngumthombo omkhulu wamandla okuphila.
Ibali likaPatricia: Ukunceda Abanye Babandezeleke
UPatricia wayelahlekelwe ngomnye weentombi zakhe ngenxa ye-bronchial pneumonia kwiminyaka emithandathu ngaphambi kwesi siganeko. Emva koko unyana wakhe naye wasweleka kwintlekele efanayo. Engakwazi ukunyamezela iintlungu, waya kugqirha wengqondo , okanye ugqirha wengqondo. Ugqirha wambhalela amayeza okudakumba kunye nemithi yokuthomalalisa.
Akazange aphelele apho. Wagqiba kwelokuba ufuna ukunceda abanye ababebandezeleka njengaye. Waqala iqela lenkxaso kwindawo yakhe lezinye iintsapho ezazilahlekelwe ngabantu ababathandayo. Ngoku, ngenxa yoko, abantu abaninzi baye bafumana ithuba lokwabelana ngentlungu yabo baze bafumane uxolo lwengqondo.
“Ukuba unyana wam ebelapha, ebeya kuzingca ngam,” utshilo uPatricia. Uzimisele ukwenza into entle ngokufa kwabantwana bakhe ivele .
Ziziphi ezinye iindlela zokunceda uhlangabezane nentlungu?
Ukusuka kula mabali, singabona ukuba aba mama bahlangabezana nentlungu yabo ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo. Kodwa bonke bafumana injongo ethile. Masishwankathele oku kwitheyibhile.
| Indlela yokujongana nomceli mngeni | Inkcazo kunye nomzekelo |
|---|---|
| Ukufumana injongo entsha | Ukuzinikela kukaLaura kunyana wakhe oneemfuno ezikhethekileyo kunye nemizamo yakhe yokuqalisa isikolo sabanye abantwana abafana naye. |
| Ukunceda abanye | UPatricia waqalisa iqela lokuxhasa abo babesifa njengaye, evakalelwa kukuba wayengeyedwa kwaye efumana intuthuzelo ekukhonzeni abanye. |
| Ukulwela utshintsho | Abanye oomama ababini (uSally noDomenica) baseka iqela lokulwela utshintsho kwimithetho yokhuseleko yokwakha ukuqinisekisa ukuba abanye abafumani ngxaki ifanayo neyabantwana babo. |
| Ukuhlala uqinile kusapho | UDiana, ezama ukuba namandla phambi kwabantwana bakhe. Xa befuna ukukhala, wayekhala yedwa ukuze abe ngumqolo oqinileyo (umqolo oqinileyo) kubo. |
| Ukufumana uncedo kwabanye | UDiana uthi inkxaso yabanye abafazi kuluntu yayiyeyona nto yamqinisayo. Akukuhle ukuba wedwa xa usentlungwini, kwaye akufuneki ube wedwa. |
Ngaba uziva ulusizi ngakumbi ngeentsuku ezikhethekileyo?
Xa ulahlekelwe ngumntu omthandayo, kunokuba buhlungu ngakumbi kwiziganeko ezikhethekileyo ezifana neentsuku zokuzalwa, uSuku loNyaka oMtsha, kunye noSuku looMama. Kuqhelekile kakhulu. Nazi ezinye zezinto ezinokukunceda ngamaxesha anjalo.
- Yamkela iimvakalelo zakho: Ukuba uziva ulusizi kwaye ufuna ukulila, yiyeke. Musa ukuyifihla imvakalelo yakho ngokucinga, "Ndifuna ukuba namandla." Intlungu yinkqubo ethatha ixesha. Asinto onokuthi nje uthi, "Kulungile, kwanele."
- Hlanganani nosapho: Endaweni yokuba wedwa, hlanganani namanye amalungu osapho. Ukuba ungumama onabantwana, umthwalo wokuzama ukudlala "umama ovuyayo " uyancipha kancinci xa uphakathi kwabanye abantu.
- Zenzele into ethile: Yenza into oyithandayo. Hlamba kakuhle, funda incwadi, yiya kwindawo yokuphumla, ufumane i-massage. Kubalulekile ukuba uziphathe kakuhle.
- Khumbula umntu olahlekileyo ngothando: pheka isidlo abasithandayo uze umnike izipho, buyela kwindawo oye kuyo naye, ujonge imifanekiso yakhe, kwaye wabelane ngeenkumbulo ezintle ngaye nabanye.
- Funa ingcebiso kagqirha: Ngamanye amaxesha le ntlungu inokuba yinto engaphaya kwamandla akho. Ukuba awukwazi ukulala, awufuni kutya, okanye awukwazi nokwenza imisebenzi yakho yemihla ngemihla, ngokuqinisekileyo bonana nogqirha wakho ukuze akunike ingcebiso. Ukuba kuyimfuneko, uza kukuthumela kwingcali yezempilo yengqondo . Ukucela uncedo akubonisi ubuthathaka, luphawu lwamandla.
Ukufelwa ngumntu omthandayo ngenxa yokothuka ngesiquphe kunokuba nzima ukujamelana nako kunentlungu eqhelekileyo, ngoko ke kubalulekile ukufumana uncedo ngamaxesha anjalo.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Kuqhelekile ukuziva uxinezelekile xa ulahlekelwe ngumntu omthandayo. Akuphosakele ukuziva ulusizi okanye ulila. Zivumele ukuba uzive ezo mvakalelo.
- Ixesha elithathwayo ukuze umntu aphile emva kwentlungu lahlukile kuye wonke umntu. Musa ukuzinyanzela ukuba ucinge, "Ndifuna ukuliphelisa ngokukhawuleza eli shwangusha."
- Musa ukubandezeleka wedwa. Yabelana ngentlungu yakho nosapho lwakho kunye nabahlobo. Yinto entle kakhulu.
- Ukufumana injongo entsha, njengokunceda abanye okanye ukunyamekela abo baxhomekeke kuwe, njengabantwana, kunokuba ngumthombo omkhulu wamandla okuphila.
- Ukuba uziva iintlungu ezinganyamezelekiyo okanye uxinezelekile engqondweni, ungathandabuzi ukubona ugqirha wakho kwaye ucele ingcebiso kugqirha. Luphawu lwamandla.
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