Xa sisiva igama elithi ukudakumba, uninzi lwethu lucinga ngoko nangoko ngezinto zengqondo ezifana nosizi, isizungu, ukukhungatheka, kunye nokuziva ungafuni ukwenza nto. Yinyani le, ezi ziimpawu eziphambili zokudakumba. Kodwa ubusazi na ukuba le meko yengqondo nayo inempembelelo enamandla emzimbeni wakho? Ngamanye amaxesha, isizathu sokwenyani sezifo ezahlukeneyo zomzimba, iintlungu, kunye nokungonwabi oye waziva ixesha elide isenokuba lolu xinzelelo engqondweni yakho.
Ezi azizo "zinto ezicingelwayo nje kuphela." Ukudakumba yimeko enokubangela utshintsho emzimbeni wakho. Umzekelo, inokucothisa indlela ogonya ngayo ukutya kwaye ibangele iingxaki zesisu. Ngenxa yokuba ezi mpawu zomzimba zinokwenzeka nakwezinye izifo ezininzi, abantu abaninzi abazifuni unyango lwazo. Abacingi nokuba iingxaki zabo zomzimba zinokubangelwa yimeko yengqondo. Ngamanye amaxesha, noogqirha banokungayiboni into enxulumene noko.
Kutheni ukudakumba kubangela iintlungu zomzimba?
Ukuze siqonde oku, kufuneka sijonge nje indlela esebenza ngayo ingqondo. Kukho iinethiwekhi zeeseli zemithambo-luvo engqondweni yethu ezilawula iimvakalelo, ezinje ngosizi nolonwabo. Okumangalisayo kukuba, ezinye zeenethiwekhi zeeseli zemithambo-luvo ezisibangela ukuba sive iintlungu zomzimba nazo zisebenza kunye nezi nethiwekhi zilawula iimvakalelo.
Ngoko ke, kumntu onesifo esifana nokudakumba, ezi nethiwekhi zemithambo-luvo engqondweni azisebenzi kakuhle. Ngoko ke, iingcali ezininzi zikholelwa ukuba indlela umntu onesifo sokudakumba aziva ngayo iintlungu yahlukile kuneyomntu oqhelekileyo. Basenokuziva iintlungu kakhulu. Oko kuthetha ukuba nayiphi na intlungu onayo, njengentlungu yomqolo, inokwenziwa mandundu kukudandatheka.
Ngamafutshane, okwenzekayo apha kukuba intlungu esentliziyweni yakho iphuma njengentlungu emzimbeni wakho. Ezi zinto zimbini zidibene.
Iimpawu eziqhelekileyo zomzimba zokudakumba
Kulungile, makhe sijonge ezona mpawu ziqhelekileyo zomzimba zokudakumba kunye nendlela ezinokukwenza uzive ngayo. Jonga ukuba unayo na enye okanye ezingaphezulu kwezi.
| Iimpawu zomzimba | Ivakalelwa njani loo nto? |
|---|---|
| Intloko ebuhlungu | Intloko ebuhlungu engaguqukiyo. Ngamanye amaxesha awukwazi nokuqonda ukuba yintoni ebangela loo nto. Ukuba unembali yentloko ebuhlungu, inokuba mandundu nangakumbi. |
| Intlungu Yomqolo, Yezihlunu NeyeMalungu | Umqolo wam usoloko ubuhlungu ngaphandle kwesizathu, izihlunu zam ziyabuhlungu, amalungu am ayabuhlungu. Ndiziva ngathi ndidiniwe, kodwa andidiniwe kangako. |
| Iintlungu zesifuba | Le yinto ekufuneka uyilumkele kakhulu. Intlungu yesifuba inokuba luphawu lwemeko embi entliziyweni, emiphungeni, okanye esiswini. Ngoko ke ukuba uneentlungu zesifuba, qiniseka ukuba ubonana nogqirha okanye uye kwi-ETU (iYunithi yoNyango oluNgxamisekileyo). Nangona kunjalo, ngamanye amaxesha ukudakumba kunokubangela ukungakhululeki okunjalo. |
| Iingxaki zoKutya | Ukuphazamiseka kwesisu, isicaphucaphu, ukudumba, iintlungu zesisu, njl. Abanye abantu banesifo sorhudo, abanye banesicaphucaphu. |
| Utshintsho ekutyeni okanye ekutyebeni | Abanye abantu balahlekelwa yiminqweno yokutya baze banciphise umzimba. Abanye batyeba ngokunqwenela ukutya okuneekhabhohayidreyithi (isonka, irayisi, iilekese). |
| Ukudinwa kunye nokudinwa | Nokuba ulala kangakanani na, awuziva udiniwe. Nokuba uvuka ebhedini kusasa kuvakala ngathi ngumzabalazo omkhulu, mhlawumbi akunakwenzeka. Uziva ungenabomi imini yonke. |
| Iingxaki zokulala | Abantu abaninzi banengxaki yokulala ebusuku. Bavuka kusasa baze bangakwazi ukuphinda balale. Okanye basokola ukulala iiyure ezininzi emva kokulala. Ngokwahlukileyo koko, abanye abantu balala kakhulu kunesiqhelo. |
| Isiyezi okanye Ubudenge | Ngamanye amaxesha ukuziva unesizungu okanye kunzima ukuma kunokuba luphawu loxinzelelo emzimbeni. |
Senza ntoni ngezi mpawu zomzimba?
Ukuba sele unenye okanye ngaphezulu kwezi mpawu zomzimba ixesha elide, musa ukucinga ukuba "ziya kuphila zodwa." Qiniseka ukuba uthetha nogqirha wakho ngale nto.
Yenza oku ngaphambi kokuba uye kugqirha.
Ukuba unako, bhala ngeempawu zakho kwincwadi encinci, njengedayari yeempawu.
- Luhlobo luni lwentlungu endiyivileyo namhlanje? (umz. intloko ebuhlungu, intlungu yomqolo)
- Imbi kangakanani? (Linganisa isikali se-1-10)
- Ngowuphi ixesha lemini oye waziva kakhulu ngalo?
- Ndenza ntoni ngelo xesha?
- Ndizive njani? (Ngaba bendibuhlungu, ndinomsindo, ndixinezelekile?)
Ngokubhala phantsi iinkcukacha ezinje, kuya kuba lula kakhulu kuwe nakugqirha wakho ukuqonda unxibelelwano phakathi kwezi mpawu kunye nesimo sakho sengqondo.
Zithini iindlela zonyango?
Kwiimeko ezininzi, xa ufumana unyango olufanelekileyo lokudakumba kwakho (uncedo lwengcebiso, amayeza, okanye zombini), ezi mpawu zomzimba ziya kuncipha ngokwemvelo.
- Amayeza: Amanye amayeza okudakumba asebenza ngokubuyisela ukusebenza kweekhemikhali (ii-neurotransmitters) ezithwala imiyalezo phakathi kweeseli zemithambo-luvo engqondweni endizikhankanyileyo ngaphambili. Njengoko imo yakho iphucuka, iintlungu zakho zomzimba nazo ziya kuqala ukwehla. Ugqirha wakho unokukunika amayeza anjenge-'duloxetine' kunye ne-'venlafaxine', aluncedo kakhulu ekulawuleni iintlungu ezingapheliyo, kunye namayeza amadala afana ne-'amitriptyline'.
- Ezinye iindlela zonyango: Ukuba unengxaki yokulala, ugqirha wakho angagqiba ekubeni akunike amayeza ahlukileyo alo mbandela. Ekubeni iintlungu kunye nokudakumba zihamba kunye, ukunciphisa iintlungu kunokunceda ekunciphiseni ukudakumba.
- Unyango Lokuziphatha Olusebenzisa Ingqondo (CBT): Olu luhlobo lokunika iingcebiso. Lukufundisa indlela yokujongana ngcono nentlungu yakho kwaye utshintshe indlela ocinga ngayo ngayo. Oku kunokuba nemiphumo emihle kwimpilo yakho yengqondo neyomzimba.
Into ebalulekileyo kukuba, akufuneki ujongane nezi zinto wedwa. Ukucela uncedo kuyakunika amandla. Ugqirha wakho ukulungele ukukunceda.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Uxinzelelo alupheleli nje engqondweni, lunokubangela intlungu yokwenyani kunye nokungonwabi emzimbeni wakho.
- Intloko ebuhlungu rhoqo, iintlungu zomzimba, isisu esibuhlungu, ukudinwa kakhulu, kunye neengxaki zokulala zinokuba ziimpawu zomzimba zokudakumba.
- Ezi mpawu zomzimba aziyonto "osandula ukuyicinga engqondweni yakho." Zinesizathu sebhayoloji. Ngoko ke ungazityesheli.
- Thetha ngokukhululekileyo nogqirha wakho ngazo zonke iimpawu zakho zengqondo nezomzimba. Kusenokubakho unxibelelwano phakathi kwezi zinto zimbini.
- Xa uxinzelelo lunyangwa ngokufanelekileyo, ezi mpawu zomzimba ezikhathazayo zihlala ziphela kancinci kancinci, ngoko ungoyiki ukufuna uncedo.
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