Te haruru o te ngaungau kai e nui ana te reo, te tangata e kōrero nui ana kia rangona e te pahi katoa ina tae mai he waea, te tangata e waiho ana i tētahi tauera mākū kua whakamahia ki runga i te moenga... Ka riri nui koe, ka pōuri hoki mō ngā mea iti rawa, tino koretake? Kāore koe i te mokemoke. He tokomaha o tātou e whakaaro ana he raruraru nui ēnei mea iti. Nā te aha tēnei e tupu ai? He mate tēnei? Me kōrero tātou mō tēnei mea i runga i te pūtaiao, he tino māmā noa iho.
He aha ēnei 'mea whakarihariha'?
He whakarāpopototanga noa iho, ko ngā 'Pet Peeves' he mea ririki e whakapataritari ana i a tātou, e whakapataritari ana i a tātou, engari kāore e tino pā ki ētahi atu. Whakaarohia te paunga o te pepa wharepaku a tētahi i roto i tō whare, ā, kāore i tukuna he pepa hou. Ehara i te mea ko te raruraru nui rawa atu o te ao. Engari i taua wā tonu, ka tino riri koe. Ka nui te āwangawanga e pā ana ki a koe, "He aha koe i pēnei ai?" Koinei te tikanga o ngā 'Pet Peeves'.
Kāore ētahi e pai ki te tangi o te tangata e ngaungau ana i tā rātou kai. Ka riri ētahi ina kōrero ana tētahi atu i runga waea. Ka riri ētahi ina ngaungau te tangata i te kapia me te kī "ngā ngokingoki". He take hinengaro, he take koiora hoki kei muri i ēnei mea katoa. Ko te kare ā-roto e pā ana ki ēnei mea katoa ko te riri me te kore okiokinga.
Ehara i te mea ko te riri te raruraru. He kare ā-tangata noa te riri. Engari ka tīmata te raruraru ina kore e taea te whakahaere.
He aha tātou ka riri ai mō ngā mea iti pēnei?
He maha ngā take mō tēnei. Me titiro tātou ki ia take.
Tetahi mea i ahu mai i te whanaketanga
Mai anō i te wā o ō tātou tūpuna, kua āwhina te kare ā-roto o te riri i te tangata kia ora. He aha te tikanga o tēnā?
1. Ina whakararuhia tētahi whāinga: Whakaarohia kei te taraiwa koe i te rori ki tētahi wāhi, ā, ka āraia tō ara e tētahi. Ka riri koe, tika? Ko te take, nā te mea ka whakararuhia tō haerenga, arā, tō whāinga, e taua tangata. Waihoki, ki te whakatangihia e tētahi he puoro nui i a koe e mahi ana, ka whakararuhia tō aro. I taua wā, ka riri anō hoki koe.
2. Ina rongo tātou i te tūpono: Kua hangaia ō tātou roro kia aro atu ki te riri ina rongo tātou i te tūpono, i te riri rānei. Hei whakatūpato i ētahi atu ki te tūpono, hei akiaki hoki i a tātou kia karo i taua tūpono. Ehara i te mea he tūpono ki a tātou te tangi o te ngau a te tangata i ōna maikuku. Engari nā tēnei tikanga tawhito i roto i tō tātou roro, ka aro atu tātou ki ngā mea e manukanuka ai tātou, kāore i te mōhiotia.
Pērā i ngā Mate Pāwera Hapori
He ariā tino whakamere tēnei. Whakaarohia he mate pāwera tetahi ki te puehu. I te tīmatanga, kāore he hua o te iti o te puehu. Engari i a koe e pāngia tonutia ana e te puehu, ka piki haere tō mate pāwera, ā, ahakoa he iti noa te puehu i runga i tō tinana, ka puta he tauhohenga nui.
He rite tonu te ' PE t Peeves'. I te tīmatanga, kāore pea koe e tino pāngia e te mahi iti a te tangata. Engari ki te puta tonu mai taua mahi, ka pāngia koe e te mate pāwera. Kātahi, ina oti taua mahi iti, ka tino riri koe.
Ngā āhuatanga e kino ake ai tēnei āhuatanga
I ētahi wā, ka kore e taea te whakahaere i te riri e puta mai ana i ēnei mea iti. Kei te ripanga i raro nei ētahi o ngā take hinengaro e whai wāhi ana ki tēnei.
| Take hinengaro | Te pānga ki a ia |
|---|---|
| Ngā Taumata Taumahatanga Teitei | Ina pāngia tātou e te ahotea, ka tino heke te taumata o tō tātou manawanui. Nō reira, ka tere tonu tā tātou riri mō ngā mea iti kāore e arohia e tātou i te nuinga o te wā. |
| Pānga Whakaemi | Ehara i te mea he raruraru iti kotahi anake, engari he maha ngā raruraru iti e puranga ana, ā, e ahua taumaha ana ki ō tātou hinengaro. He rite ki te peere wai e whakakī ana i te pata kotahi i ia wā. Ko te pata whakamutunga tēnei e maringi ana. |
| Te whakaaro kāore i te mana whakahaere (Ngā raruraru mana whakahaere) | Ina whakaaro tātou kāore e taea e tātou te whakahaere i tētahi mea, ka puta te pouri me te manukanuka. Ka riri tātou nā te mea kāore e taea e tātou te whakahaere i ngā mea iti e mahia ana e ētahi atu. |
| Te Mana o te Whānau | Ko ngā mea e kitea ana e tātou i te tamarikitanga ka pā ki ō tātou whanonga. Mena he hunga riri mō ngā mea iti, ā, kāore e taea te whakahaere i te ahotea, tera pea ka whai tātou i taua tauira. |
Kāore pea tēnei e nui atu i te 'whakapouri noa iho'?
Āe. I ētahi wā, he āhuatanga tēnei e hiahia ana kia rongoatia, kaua ko te whakararuraru noa iho. Ko tētahi o aua āhuatanga ko te misophonia .
Ko te Misophonia he āhuatanga e pāngia ai te tangata e te riri nui, te whakarihariha, te manukanuka rānei ina rongohia he oro motuhake (hei tauira, te ngaungau kai, te manawa, te pato). He kino rawa atu i te 'whakarihariha' noa nā te mea ka whakararuraru i te oranga o ia rā o te tangata (ngā mahi kura, ngā mahi tari, ngā taunekeneke pāpori ).
Whakaarohia pēnei: Ehara i te mea ka pāngia te katoa e te mate i te inu waipiro iti. Engari ki te nui rawa te inu waipiro me te kore e whakahaere, ka noho hei mate hauora. He mea noa te pouri, engari ki te haere tonu me te kore e taea te whakahaere, he mate hauora e kiia nei ko te pouri. Waihoki, he mea noa te riri iti ki te haruru a tetahi. Engari ki te kore e taea e koe te whakahaere i taua riri, ā, ka tīmata koe ki te aukati i te huarahi ki ngā wāhi e puta mai ana taua haruru, whawhai ki a rātou, me te karo i te haere ki aua wāhi, tera pea he mate e hiahia ana ki te maimoatanga.
Nā, he aha tā tātou mahi?
He iti noa ngā mea ka taea e koe te mahi hei whakahaere i te riri mō ngā mea iti pēnei.
1. Anga atu ki te raruraru i te aroaro o te kanohi
Ki te mea kei te whakararuraru koe i tētahi mea, kimihia he otinga kaua e oma atu. Hei tauira, ki te mea kei te mātaki tetahi i ngā ataata i runga i tā rātou waea me te reo nui i runga i te pahi, ka taea e koe te pātai mārire, "Aroha mai, me mau mai he taringa?"
2. Ngā mahi manawa me te whakamarie i te hinengaro
He mea tino nui te whakaiti i tō taumata ahotea whānui. Ka taea tēnei mā te manawa hōhonu, te mahi i ngā mahi manawa, te mahi i te aroātahi, me te mahi i ngā mea pēnei i te whakakori tinana me te whai wāhi atu ki tētahi mahi whakangahau e pai ana ki a koe.
3. Kōrero tika, engari me te atawhai.
I ētahi wā, ko te kōrero tika te otinga pai rawa atu. Hei tauira, ka taea e koe te kī atu pēnei, "Aroha mai, nāku pea te he, engari e pouri ana ahau mō te paru i waiho e koe i runga i tō kapu kawhe." He pai tēnei mō ngā taha e rua. Tērā pea ka huri te whanonga o te tangata kē, ā, tērā pea ka pai ake tō whakaaro mōu ake nā te mea kua whakapuaki koe i ō kare ā-roto.
4. Tirohia mēnā kua hipa tō whakautu i te rohe
Ki te whakaaro koe, "Kāore au i te tika kia riri pēnei mō tētahi mea iti nei," ki te puta he taumahatanga tinana, he pānga tonu rānei ki ō whanaungatanga, he tohu pea tēnei mō tētahi raruraru nui ake. I roto i ēnei āhuatanga, he mea nui kia rapu āwhina ngaio me te āwhina hauora. Kōrero ki tō tākuta mō tēnei. Ka taea e ia te āwhina i a koe kia tika te huarahi. Ka taea e ngā maimoatanga pēnei i te Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) te āwhina i a koe ki te whakahaere i ēnei momo raruraru.
Ko te mea nui kia kaua e whakama ki ēnei kare ā-roto, kia mārama ki a rātou, ā, kia tono āwhina mēnā e tika ana.
Karere Tangohia ki te Kāinga
- Ko ngā 'Pikariri mō ngā mea iti' he mea e riri ai koe. He mea noa tēnei ki te tini tāngata.
- Kei muri i ēnei kare ā-roto ko ngā kare ā-tangata noa pēnei i te riri me te manukanuka. He wāhi anō hoki tō ngā take whanaketanga ki tēnei.
- Ka kino ake pea tēnei āhua e ngā āhuatanga pēnei i te ahotea, te manukanuka tonu, me te kore mana whakahaere.
- Ki te pāngia tō oranga o ia rā e te nui rawa o tō tauhohenga ki ētahi oro, he mate pea tēnei e kiia nei ko te Misophonia.
- Ka taea te whakahaere i ēnei mā roto i ngā mahi manawa, te kōrero māhaki, me te whakaiti i te ahotea.
- Mena ka nui ake tō urupare i te taumata noa, kaua e mangere ki te toro atu ki tō tākuta mō ētahi tohutohu.
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