Kodi chilichonse chiyenera kukhala 'Changwiro'? Pali mbali yoopsa ya izi (Perfectionism)

Kodi mukudziwa munthu amene amaganiza kuti ngakhale achite chiyani, chiyenera kukhala changwiro, popanda kulakwitsa ngakhale pang'ono? Mwina inunso mumamva chimodzimodzi. Ngakhale zingawoneke ngati chinthu chabwino kuchita chinthu chimodzimodzi, popanda zolakwika zilizonse, ichi kwenikweni ndi chinthu chomwe chimayambitsa kupsinjika maganizo ndipo chingakhudze miyoyo yathu molakwika. Lero tikulankhula za mkhalidwe wamaganizo wakuti 'chirichonse chiyenera kukhala changwiro', kutanthauza, Kukonda Zinthu Zonse .

Kodi kukonda zinthu zonse mwangwiro n’chiyani kwenikweni?

Mwachidule, ndi kufunikira kwakukulu kokhala ndi chilichonse changwiro, kukhala wangwiro, kuti ena azikuona ngati wangwiro. Koma izi n'zosiyana kwambiri ndi kuyesetsa kuchita zonse zomwe mungathe. Kuyesa kuchita zonse zomwe mungathe n'kwabwino. Koma kufuna kuchita zonse bwino ndi maganizo oipa omwe mumadzipanikiza, kudzipangira zolinga zosatheka, kenako n'kukhumudwa mukalephera kuzikwaniritsa.

Pali mitundu iwiri ikuluikulu ya chizolowezi chofuna kuchita zinthu mwangwiro. Yonseyi imapanga miyezo yapamwamba. Koma anthu okonda kuchita zinthu mwangwiro amakumana ndi nkhawa kwambiri akalephera kukwaniritsa zolinga zimenezo.

Malinga ndi kafukufuku , vutoli lili ndi magawo atatu:

• Kudzidalira: Kuyembekezera ungwiro kuchokera kwa iwe mwini.
• Kufuna kuchita zinthu mwangwiro: Kuyembekezera kuchita zinthu mwangwiro kuchokera kwa anthu ozungulira inu (banja, abwenzi, antchito).
• Kukonda zinthu mwangwiro komwe kumayendetsedwa ndi anthu: Kupirira ngakhale anthu ena atakukakamizani kuti mukhale angwiro.

Kaya ndinu amtundu wanji, mukudziikira malamulo okhwima kwambiri komanso okhwima. Izi zikuwononga kwambiri kuposa zabwino. Tiyeni tiwone zomwe zili.

1. Kuzengereza ndi kuchepa kwa ntchito

N'zosadabwitsa kuti anthu omwe amayesa kuchita chilichonse mwaukhondo komanso mwangwiro nthawi zambiri amachedwa kuchita zinthu. Izi zikutanthauza kuti sagwira ntchito bwino. N’chifukwa chiyani zili choncho?

Tangoganizani kuti muli ndi ntchito yaikulu yoti muchite. Monga munthu wofuna kuchita zinthu mwangwiro, mukukonzekera kuichita bwino 100%, ngakhale pang'ono kwambiri. Koma kupanikizika kwa momwe iyenera kukhalira yangwiro kumakupangitsani kuopa kuyamba ntchitoyo. Mumaganiza kuti, "O, sindidzakhala wangwiro monga momwe ndimaganizira," ndipo mumayimitsa kuyamba ntchitoyo mpaka kumapeto kwenikweni.

2. Kufooka kwa maganizo ndi kupsinjika maganizo kwakukulu

Monga munthu wofuna kuchita zinthu mwangwiro, mumakhala ndi mavuto ambiri. Izi zitha kukhala zodzipangira nokha, kapena zitha kukhala zomwe mukuganiza kuti zimachokera kwa anthu. Kupanikizika kopitirira muyeso kumeneku kungakupangitseni kukhala ofooka kwambiri m'maganizo. Izi zimatsegula khomo la mavuto ena ambiri amisala.

Zina mwa izo ndi izi:

• Nkhawa ndi kuvutika maganizo
• Maganizo odzipha
• Kusungulumwa
• Kusaleza mtima ndi kukhumudwa
• Mkwiyo
• Kuganizira kwambiri zinthu mopitirira muyeso komanso kukakamiza

Kuphatikiza apo, mungakhale pachiwopsezo cha matenda otchedwa Imposter Syndrome . Apa ndi pamene mumamva ngati, "Sindili woyenera udindo uwu, ntchito iyi, ubale uwu. Sindili wabwino ngati ena. Ndikunyenga anthu." Malingaliro awa angakulepheretseninso kuchita bwino pantchito kapena m'maphunziro anu.

3. Nkhawa ndi Kuvutika Maganizo

Pali ubale wolimba kwambiri pakati pa kufuna kuchita zinthu mwangwiro ndi nkhawa/kuvutika maganizo. Mukalephera kukwaniritsa miyezo yapamwamba yomwe mumadziikira nokha, kupsinjika maganizo ndi nkhawa zomwe mumamva zingayambitse nkhawa. Ngati vutoli lipitirira, likhoza kukhala kuvutika maganizo.

Anthu ena sasonyeza malingaliro amenewa poyera. Amabisa nkhawa zawo, chisoni chawo, ndi kukhumudwa kwawo, ndipo amaika kumwetulira 'kwabwino kwambiri'. Izi ndi zoopsa kwambiri. Chifukwa ngakhale mutakhumudwa ndi moyo ndipo muli ndi malingaliro ofuna kudzipha, palibe amene akudziwa za izi. Mungadzimve wopanda pake.

Ngati mukumva izi, chonde musavutike nokha. Lankhulani ndi munthu amene mumamukhulupirira. Kapena pitani kwa dokotala wanu ndipo mukambirane za izi.

4. Mavuto a thanzi la thupi

Kupsinjika maganizo kumeneku kungakhudzenso thupi. Anthu ena amatha kukhala ndi vuto la kudya. Chitsanzo ndi Orthorexia Nervosa . Izi zimachitika munthu akakhala ndi malamulo okhwima komanso okhwima okhudza zomwe amadya ndi kumwa, ndipo amadzimva kuti ali ndi mlandu komanso akuvutika maganizo kwambiri ngati atasiya kudya pang'ono.

Kufunika kwakukulu kumeneku kolamulira chilichonse m'moyo nthawi zina kungayambitse matenda a Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD).Zingathenso kukula kukhala matenda amisala otchedwa perfectionism. Perfectionism ndi chilakolako champhamvu chofuna kulamulira. Pamene ulamuliro umenewo utayika, mavuto ena amisala angabuke.

5. Kusokonezeka kwa ubale wa anthu

Chotsatira china chachikulu ndi kupsinjika kwa ubale wanu ndi banja lanu, mnzanu, ndi anzanu. Izi ndi zoona makamaka ngati mukuyembekezera miyezo yapamwamba 'yangwiro' kuchokera kwa ena yomwe mukuyembekezera kuchokera kwa inu nokha, ndipo ndi pomwe mavuto amabuka.

Mungatsutse ngakhale zinthu zazing'ono zomwe mnzanuyo amachita. Mungakhale ndi ziyembekezo zosayembekezereka kwa ana anu. Simungakhutire ndi ntchito yomwe ena akuchita kuntchito. Izi zitha kuyika mavuto ambiri kwa omwe akuzungulirani ndikupangitsa kuti asakhale nanu. Izi sizoyenera paubwenzi uliwonse.

6. Kulephera kukhala ndi moyo panopa

Maganizo a munthu wokonda zinthu zangwiro nthawi zonse amagwira ntchito. Simuli munthawi yomwe muli pano, muli m'mutu mwanu. Mwina mukudandaula za chinthu chomwe chinachitika kale ("Ndikanachita bwino pang'ono ..."), kapena mukukonzekera momwe mungachitire chinthu bwino mtsogolo.

Izi zimakupangitsani kutaya chisangalalo ndi mtendere wa nthawi ino. Mukamalankhula ndi mnzanu, mukakhala ndi banja, kapena mukupita kumalo okongola, maganizo anu sali pamenepo. Izi zimakupangitsaninso kumva kuti ndinu nokha komanso mukukhumudwa.