Ukufika komntwana omtsha kusapho sisiganeko esivuyisayo nesitshintsha ubomi, akunjalo? Wonke umntu ujonge phambili ekuboneni umntwana encuma kwaye edlala naye. Kodwa ngolu vuyo, uxanduva olutsha, ubusuku bokungalali, kunye nokutshintsha ubomi bosapho, ngamanye amaxesha bobabini oomama nootata banokuziva bexinezelekile kwaye belusizi. Nangona sihlala sithetha ngokudakumba emva kokuzalwa koomama, akukho ngxoxo ingako kuluntu malunga nokuba le meko inokuchaphazela ootata ngendlela efanayo. Ngoko ke namhlanje, masithethe ngale nto.
Ingaba le meko ichaphazela ootata ngokwenene?
Ewe. Le yimpendulo emfutshane. Siyazi ngeengxaki zempilo yengqondo ezibangelwa lutshintsho lweehomoni ezenzeka emzimbeni kamama emva kokuba nomntwana. Kodwa ngaba utata angahlangabezana nento efanayo? Uphando lufumanise ukuba
utata omnye kwabalishumi abatsha ufumana inqanaba elithile lokudakumba ngaphambi okanye emva kokuba nomntwana. Eli nani alikho ngaphantsi kakhulu kunenani loomama abahlangabezana nale meko. Nangona kungekho sizathu sinye soku, kukho izizathu ezininzi ezinokubakho.
- Ukungalali kakuhle : Kunqabile ukulala kakuhle nosana olusandul’ ukuzalwa kwiinyanga ezimbalwa zokuqala. Xa ungalali ngokwaneleyo iintsuku ezininzi, oku kunokuba nefuthe elikhulu kwimpilo yakho yomzimba neyengqondo.
- Ukwanda kwemisebenzi: Ukuba ngutata kuzisa uxanduva olukhulu. Ukucinga ngekamva lomntwana, iindleko zosapho, kunye neemfuno zomfazi wakho nomntwana wakho konke oku kunokuba yingxaki.
- Ukutshintsha kweendlela zosapho: Inkululeko nexesha owawunalo ngaphambi kokuba umntwana afike alisekho. Njengoko lonke ingqalelo ijoliswe kumntwana, ungaziva unesizungu.
- Ubudlelwane nomfazi: Emva kokuba umntwana ezelwe, ingqalelo epheleleyo yomfazi iya kumntwana, nto leyo enokubangela utshintsho kubudlelwane phakathi kwabo babini. Oku kukwachaphazela namanye amadoda ngokwengqondo.
Ngenxa yokuba kungekabikho lwazi lungako kuluntu lwethu ngale meko, ootata abaninzi bayathandabuza ukuvuma ukuba baziva ngolu hlobo okanye bathethe ngayo. Abaninzi bazama ukugcina ezi mvakalelo zifihliweyo ngenxa yeenkolelo ezisetyenziswa ngabantu ezifana nokuthi "amadoda akakhali."
Ukuba ungutata omtsha, hlala ujonge ezi mpawu
Ukuba ungutata omtsha, okanye sele ungutata womntwana omncinci, kufuneka ucinge ngempilo yakho yengqondo. Kuba kuphela xa usempilweni apho unokunyamekela ngcono usana lwakho kunye nonina. Xa uxinezelekile, usenokungakhathali kangako ngokhuseleko lomntwana wakho. Ngoko ke qaphela ezi mpawu zibalulekileyo.
| Iimpawu / Umahluko | Indlela oziva ngayo (ngokulula) |
|---|
| Utshintsho kwindlela yokulala nokutya | Kuqhelekile ukuba ungalali ngenxa yomntwana wakho. Kodwa ngaba awusakwazi ukulala nokuba umntwana wakho ulele? Okanye ulala ngaphezu kokuba kufanele? Ngaba ulahlekelwa ngumdla wokutya okanye unqwenela ukutya okungakumbi? Ezi ziimpawu ekufuneka uzilumkele. |
| Ukuziva ungenamandla | Ngaba uhlala uziva udiniwe kwaye ungenabomi? Ngaba ukufumanisa kunzima ukwenza neyona misebenzi incinci? Oku kunokuba yinto engaphezulu kokudinwa nje. |
| Ukungonwabi kwizinto ebezimnandi ngaphambili | Ngaba uphelelwe ngumnqweno wokuncokola nabahlobo, ukubukela iTV, okanye ukudlala? Awufuni nokudlala nomntwana wakho? Olu luphawu olukhulu lokudakumba. |
| Ukukhathazeka, umsindo, kunye nosizi | Ngaba uyacaphuka ngenxa yezinto ezincinci? Ngaba uziva ukhathazekile ngayo yonke into, ulusizi ngaphandle kwesizathu? Ngaba uziva ngathi uyasilela, ngathi awukwazi ukwenza nantoni na kakuhle? |
Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuba, ukuba olu hlobo lotshintsho kwimo yakho eqhelekileyo luhlala iiveki ezininzi , akukabi lixesha lokucela uncedo.
Ungenza ntoni njengotata ukuze woyise le meko?
Asikuko ukuba umele ulwe wedwa le nto. Ungayilawula le meko ngezinto ezincinci.
Zama ukulala kakuhle.
Siyazi ukuba oku akulula njengoko kuvakala, kodwa ukulala kubalulekile kwimpilo yengqondo. Thetha nomfazi wakho nize nibeke ishedyuli ethile yokuba nobabini ninyamekele umntwana ebusuku. Umzekelo, mvumele umfazi wakho alale ngelixa wena unyamekele umntwana kwiiyure zokuqala ezimbalwa zobusuku, nawe ulale ngelixa yena enyamekele umntwana kwiiyure ezimbalwa ezilandelayo. Lala kancinci emini ukuba kunokwenzeka.
Thetha ngengqondo yakho.
Awuwedwa kolu hambo. Thetha ngokukhululekileyo nomfazi wakho ngeemvakalelo zakho, amathemba akho, kunye noxinzelelo ophantsi kwalo. Ukuthi, "Ndivakalelwa ngolu hlobo," akubonisi ubuthathaka; luphawu lwamandla. Xa nijongene nalo mceli mngeni kunye, yonke into iba lula kakhulu. Mhlawumbi umfazi wakho uvakalelwa ngendlela efanayo.
Zinike ixesha lakho.
Fumana imizuzu eli-15-20 ngosuku yokwenza into oyithandayo. Funda incwadi, mamela umculo, uzilolonge, okanye ube ngaphandle. Eli khefu lincinci liza kukuzisela uxolo olukhulu engqondweni.
Funa ingcebiso kagqirha.
Uninzi lwexesha, ezi mvakalelo ziyaphela kwiintsuku ezimbalwa. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba iimpawu esizikhankanyileyo apha ngasentla ziyaqhubeka kangangeeveki ezingaphezu kwezimbini kwaye zichaphazela imisebenzi yakho yemihla ngemihla,
bona ugqirha ngaphandle kokuthandabuza . Yeyona nto ingcono onokuyenza. Mhlawumbi ngokucetyiswa okanye, ukuba kuyimfuneko, amayeza, le meko inokunyangeka ngokupheleleyo.
Umbuzo abantu abaninzi abawubuzayo uthi: "Ndikhe ndanembali yokudakumba . Ingaba yiyo loo nto ndinokuthi ndibe nale meko emva kokuba nomntwana?" Impendulo: Ewe, ukuba ukhe waba nokudakumba ngaphambili, umngcipheko uphezulu kancinci. Kodwa eyona nto ilungileyo kukuba sele uyayazi. Ngoko unokuzibona ngokukhawuleza iimpawu ukuba ziyavela. Lungela ngengqondo nangaphambi kokuba ube nomntwana. Yakha ubudlelwane obuhle bokuxhasa nomfazi wakho. Gcina ubudlelwane nabahlobo nezalamane ezinokukunceda. Kwakhona, ukuba kuyimfuneko, thetha nogqirha ngale nto kwangaphambili kwaye ufumane ingcebiso.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Emva kokufumana umntwana, bobabini oomama nootata banokuba noxinzelelo emva kokubeleka . Yinto eqhelekileyo leyo.
- Lumka ngeempawu ezinje ngokutshintsha kweemvakalelo, utshintsho kwindlela yokulala nokutya, amandla aphantsi, kunye nokulahlekelwa lulonwabo kwizinto ebezimnandi ngaphambili.
- Thetha ngokukhululekileyo nomfazi wakho ngeemvakalelo zakho. Inkxaso yakhe iya kuba ngumthombo omkhulu wamandla kuwe.
- Zama ukulala kangangoko unako. Yenzani ishedyuli kunye.
- Ukuba ezi mpawu ziyaqhubeka kangangeeveki ezininzi, nceda udibane nogqirha ukuze akunike icebiso . Ukucela uncedo luphawu lwamandla, hayi ubuthathaka.
Uxinzelelo Emva Kokubeletha, Uxinzelelo Lwamadoda, Impilo Yengqondo KaTata, Ukuba Nomntwana, Uxinzelelo Lwengqondo, Uxinzelelo Emva Kokubeletha, Uxinzelelo Lwamadoda
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