Kutheni abantwana abancinci bezenzakalisa?
Ngokwenene, kutheni abantwana bethu abancinci bezilimaza ngolu hlobo? Cinga ngale nto, xa beziva bexinezelekile, bedakumbile, benomsindo, okanye bekhathazekile kangangokuba abakwaziyo ukuyilawula, badla ngokwenza ezi zinto njengenzame yokuyeka okanye yokususa ezo mvakalelo zinzima okwethutyana. Oku akuyonzame yokuphelisa ubomi babo. Nangona kunjalo, oku kuthetha ukuba kunokubakho uxinzelelo olukhulu lweemvakalelo ngaphakathi kubo, ingxaki yengqondo efuna ingqalelo. Ngamanye amaxesha, phakathi kwabantwana abancinci, uxinzelelo loontanga lunokukhokelela kwezi zinto. Kungaqala ngengcinga efana nokuthi 'abanye bayayenza, nam ndifanele ndizame', ize emva koko ibe ngumkhwa. Abanye abantwana banoxinzelelo olukhulu lokwenza yonke into ngokugqibeleleyo (ukuthanda ukugqibelela) , kwaye kunzima ukunyamezela nempazamo encinci. Abanye banokwenza ngenxa yomsindo, usizi, ukungabi naxabiso , kunye nokuphelelwa lithemba , bengakwazi ukulawula iimvakalelo zabo. Ngamanye amaxesha, oku kunokubangelwa ziziganeko ezibuhlungu okanye amava abuhlungu adlulileyo angaziwa mntu. Ezi ziingxaki abantwana abancinci abazifumana bodwa kwaye bazigcine bevalelwe ngaphakathi. Nangona kunjalo, njengoko ulwazi malunga noku lusanda kuluntu, abantwana abaninzi ngoku banethuba lokufumana uncedo abaludingayo. Khumbula, okukhona uqaphela oku ngokukhawuleza, kokukhona abazali banokumnceda umntwana wabo. Kuba ukuzenzakalisa kunokuba ngumkhwa , kwaye ngamanye amaxesha kukho umngcipheko omkhulu wokwenzakala okanye ukugula okungalindelekanga.Unganceda njani njengomzali?
Ngoku makhe sijonge into onokuyenza njengomzali xa ufumanisa ukuba umntwana wakho uyazenzakalisa.Qonda iimvakalelo zakho kuqala.
Into yokuqala ekufuneka uyiqonde kukuba xa ufumanisa ukuba umntwana wakho uyazilimaza, okanye ukrokrela ukuba usenokuba uzenzakalisa, kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukuva iimvakalelo ezahlukeneyo. Ungaziva umangalisiwe, unomsindo, ulusizi, uyoyika, udanile, okanye udidekile. Ungaziva ukhathazekile, uzibuza, "Kutheni umntwana wam engezanga kum ukuze afumane uncedo?" okanye ungazisola, uzibuza, "Kutheni ndingazange ndikwazi oku kwangethuba?" Zonke ezi mvakalelo ziyaqondakala ngokupheleleyo. Kodwa khumbula, oku akusilo ityala lakho okanye lomntwana wakho. Ngoko ke, zinike ixesha lokuchonga iimvakalelo eziza kuwe kuqala. Zithethe nomntu uze umvumele aphume. Mhlawumbi licebo elihle ukukhala, ukuthetha nomhlobo osenyongweni, okanye ukuhambahamba ukuze ucoce ingqondo yakho, okanye ucinge nje ngokuthula. Ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba ezi mvakalelo zinzima kakhulu ukuzithwala, ukuthetha nogqirha wengqondo kunokukunceda uhlele ezi zinto kwaye ufumane umbono othile. Emva koko unokubonelela ngenkxaso umntwana wakho ngokuzolileyo.Phanda oku ngononophelo uze ufumane ulwazi.
Okulandelayo, funda kangangoko unako ngokuzenzakalisa , isizathu sokuba abantwana abancinci bakwenze, kunye nendlela onokubanceda ngayo ukuba bayeke. Abanye abantwana baqala ngenxa yoxinzelelo loontanga baze bafumane kunzima ukuyeka. Abanye balwa noxinzelelo lokwenza yonke into ngokugqibeleleyo kwaye kunzima ukwamkela neempazamo ezincinci. Abanye, njengoko sithethe ngazo ngaphambili, balwa neemvakalelo ezinzima ukuzilawula, ezinje ngomsindo, usizi, iimvakalelo zokungabi naxabiso, kunye nokuphelelwa lithemba. Ngamanye amaxesha, unobangela wale meko kukwenzakala okungaziwayo kunye neziganeko ezibuhlungu . Kuqhelekile ukuva intlungu xa ucinga ukuba umntwana wakho usenokuba uhlangabezana nezi mvakalelo. Nangona kunzima, khumbula ukuba ukufumana ukuba zeziphi iingcinezelo eziqhuba umntwana wakho ukuba azilimaze linyathelo elibalulekileyo kwindlela eya ekuchacheni.Ukuthetha nomntwana wakho kubaluleke kakhulu!
Okulandelayo, thetha nomntwana wakho. Ukuthetha ngesihloko esibuhlungu ngolu hlobo akulula. Usenokungazi nokuba ufuna ukuthini. Kulungile. Indlela othetha ngayo ibaluleke ngaphezu koko ukuthethayo. Xa uqala incoko, ungatsho nje ukuba uyazi ukuba uyazilimaza okanye uyazilimaza ngenye indlela. Emva koko, mxelele ukuba uyamkhathalela, uyamthanda, kwaye uzimisele ukumnceda ayeke. Umntwana wakho mhlawumbi uya kufumana kunzima ukuthetha ngale nto naye. Usenokuziva eneentloni, enetyala, okanye esoyika indlela oza kusabela ngayo kunye nemiphumo eya kuba yintoni. Unganciphisa olu loyiko ngokuthi:Endaweni yokohlwaya, ukuthethisa, okanye ukufundisa, phulaphula ngononophelo oko umntwana wakho akutshoyo ngokubuza imibuzo. Kuphephe ukugweba, ukuphendula ngoloyiko, okanye ukuphendula ngokuzonda. Endaweni yoko, zama ukuphendula ngendlela enovelwano nenkxaso nanini na xa kunokwenzeka. Nceda umntwana wakho aqonde ukuba ukuzenzakalisa kudla ngokunxulunyaniswa namava abuhlungu okanye uxinzelelo olugqithisileyo. Emva koko, buza umntwana wakho ukuba zeziphi iingxaki ezinzima ajongene nazo. Usenokungakulungeli ukuthetha ngazo, okanye usenokungazi nokuba kutheni esenza njalo. Nangona kunjalo, cacisa ukuba ufuna ukumqonda kwaye ufumane iindlela zokunceda. Ungamangaliswa kukuba umntwana wakho uyayichasa imizamo yakho yokuthetha. Usenokuthi hayi, athukuthele, akhale, akhwaze, okanye angene egumbini aze avale ucango. Umntwana wakho usenokuthula okanye athi, "Awundiqondi." Ukuba kwenzeka into efana nale, zama ukuhlala uzolile kwaye ube nomonde. Musa ukuyeka - zama ukuthetha kwakhona ngelinye ixesha.Kubalulekile ukufuna uncedo lweengcali.
Into elandelayo ebaluleke kakhulu kukufuna uncedo kwingcali yezempilo yengqondo efanelekileyo. Banokukunceda uqonde ukuba kutheni umntwana wakho ezilimaza. Banokunceda umntwana wakho aphilise iintlungu ezindala kwaye aphuhlise izakhono ezintsha zokujongana noxinzelelo lobomi. Unyango lunika abantwana abancinci ithuba lokubalisa amabali abo, babeke amava abo anzima ngamazwi, kwaye bafunde izakhono zokujongana noxinzelelo oluyinxalenye yobomi. Unyango lunokunceda ekuchongeni naziphi na iimeko zempilo yengqondo ezisisiseko ezifuna uvavanyo kunye nonyango. Kubantwana abaninzi abancinci, ukuzenzakalisa kunokuba luphawu lwengxaki yempilo yengqondo, efana nokudakumba , isifo se-bipolar , intlungu engasonjululwanga, ukuziphatha okunyanzelekileyo , okanye umzabalazo wokugqibelela . Kubalulekile ukuba umntwana wakho afumane ingcali yezonyango evulelekileyo kwaye ekhululekile kuye. Ukuba ufuna uncedo lokufumana umntu, ugqirha wakho wosapho okanye umcebisi wesikolo unokubonelela ngesikhokelo.Qhubeka uxhasa kwaye ukhuthaza umntwana wakho.
Ngelixa umntwana wakho efuna uncedo lobuchwephesha, hlala ubandakanyeka kangangoko unako kule nkqubo. Cela ingcebiso kugqirha wengqondo malunga nendlela yokuthetha nomntwana wakho kunye nendlela yokumxhasa. Kwakhona, buza umntwana wakho indlela onokunceda ngayo ngcono. Umzekelo, ezi zinto zinokunceda:- Yazisa umntwana wakho ukuba ulapho ukuze uthethe naye xa iimvakalelo zibuhlungu kwaye iingxaki zibonakala zinzima kakhulu ukuzinyamezela.
- Xa uxinzelelo luba lukhulu, nceda umntwana wakho enze isicwangciso sento anokuyenza endaweni yokuzenzakalisa.
- Thetha ngamava emihla ngemihla, kwaye ukhuthaze umntwana wakho ukuba athethe ngeemvakalelo, iimfuno, ukuphoxeka, impumelelo kunye nezimvo.
- Mamela oko kuthethwa ngumntwana, mthuthuzele, mncede acinge ngezisombululo zeengxaki, kwaye ube lapho ukuze umxhase xa esengxakini.
- Yenzani into emnandi, elula, okanye nichithe ixesha kunye nithetha. Mhlawumbi ningahambahamba, nihambe ngemoto, nitye kunye, okanye nenze imisebenzi emincinci.
- Gxila kwizinto ezilungileyo. Nangona ukuthetha ngeengxaki kunokunceda, musa ukuhlala ucinga ngazo. Qiniseka ukuba ubandakanya izinto ezilungileyo ebomini bakho kwincoko yakho.
Khumbula, uthando lwakho, ukuthembana kwakho, kunye nenkxaso yakho engagungqiyo zezona zinto umntwana wakho azidingayo ngaphezu kwayo nayiphi na enye into ngeli xesha.
Ufanele ube ngumzekelo omhle.
Enye into ebalulekileyo kukuba ungumzekelo omhle. Umntwana wakho uya kuphenjelelwa yindlela osabela ngayo kuxinzelelo noxinzelelo. Jonga indlela olawula ngayo iimvakalelo zakho, indlela ojongana ngayo nokukhathazeka kwemihla ngemihla, uxinzelelo, noxinzelelo. Jonga ukuba uyabagxeka abanye, uzigxeke, okanye ucaphuke ngokukhawuleza. Ukuba uneendlela ongafuni ukuba umntwana wakho azilingise, cinga ngokuzitshintsha.Yiba nomonde kwaye ube nethemba.
Okokugqibela, yiba nomonde kwaye ube nethemba. Ukuqonda ukuba umntwana wakho uyazenzakalisa kunokuba sisiqalo sohambo olude. Kungathatha ixesha ukuyeka – ngamanye amaxesha umntwana wakho usenokungafuni ukuyeka, okanye usenokungakulungeli ukwenza utshintsho olufunekayo. Ukuyeka ukuzenzakalisa okanye ukuzisika kufuna inkuthazo nokuzimisela. Kukwafuna ukuzazi , nokufunda izakhono ezintsha zokulawula uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo. Ezi zinto zithatha ixesha, kwaye zihlala zifuna uncedo lobuchwephesha. Njengomzali, kuya kufuneka ube nomonde. Kodwa themba ukuba ngolwalathiso olufanelekileyo, uthando kunye nenkxaso, umntwana wakho unokuyeka aze afunde ukujongana neemvakalelo zakhe ngendlela ephilileyo.Isishwankathelo kunye nezinto ekufuneka uzikhumbule
Kulungile, ngoko ke ndiyathemba ukuba ufumene izimvo ezithile kwinto esithethe ngayo. Ukuzilimaza kumntwana omncinci luphawu lokuba uphantsi koxinzelelo olukhulu. Nazi izinto ezibalulekileyo ekufuneka uzikhumbule:- Asikuko oku okubangela umntwana okanye kwakho. Musa ukwamkela ityala.
- Qaphela iimvakalelo zakho. Kuphela ngokuhlala uzolile apho ungamnceda khona umntwana wakho.
- Thetha nomntwana wakho. Ngaphandle kokumthethisa okanye ukumthethisa, mamela ngokuqonda nangothando.
- Qiniseka ukuba ufuna uncedo lweengcali. Ingcali yezonyango eqeqeshiweyo inokunceda kakhulu ekulawuleni le meko.
- Qhubeka unika umntwana wakho uthando, inkxaso, kunye nenkuthazo. Mxelele ukuba unaye.
- Yiba nomonde. Kungathatha ixesha ukuphiliswa. Kodwa ungalilahli ithemba.
Umntwana wakho akayedwa. Awuwedwa. Ngenkxaso efanelekileyo, ungadlula kule meko.
Ukuzilimaza , Ukuzilimaza, Abantwana Abancinci, Impilo Yengqondo, Inkxaso Yabazali, Ingcebiso, Unyango











💬 Comments (0)
Akukho zimvo zithunyelweyo okwangoku. Faka uluvo lwakho apha okokuqala.
Faka uluvo lwakho