Ingabe ngezinye izikhathi unomuzwa wokuthi abantu kulezi zinsuku, ikakhulukazi labo abasezinkundleni zokuxhumana , bacabanga ngabo kuphela futhi bazenze babukeke kahle? Kunjengokungathi kukhona igagasi elithi "mina", "impumelelo yami", "impilo yami" yonke indawo, akunjalo? Uma ubheka i-TikTok, i-YouTube, ne-Instagram, kubonakala sengathi umkhuba uwukubonisa umhlaba yonke imininingwane yempilo yakho. Abanye abantu bakubiza ngokuthi 'ubhubhane lobuNazi'. Ngakho-ke sonke siya ngokuya siba nobugovu futhi sizicabangela ngokweqile? Ake sixoxe ngalokhu ngokujulile.
Kalula nje, kuyini ukuzikhukhumeza?
Kalula nje, ukuzikhukhumeza kuyisimo sengqondo lapho umuntu ekholelwa khona ukuthi "ukhethekile kunabanye, ukuthi izidingo zakhe zingaphezu kwakho konke," nokuthi uzibheka njengomuntu obaluleke kakhulu. Lokhu akuyona into enhle noma embi ngempela. Ukuzethemba okuncane nokuziqhenya ngawe kuyinto enhle empilweni. Kodwa yilapho lokhu kuba kukhulu kakhulu lapho kuvela khona izinkinga.
Lesi simo sisesigabeni esihlukahluka kumuntu nomuntu. Labo abasezingeni eliphezulu, phakathi kuka-1% no-6% wabantu, bangase babe nesifo sengqondo esibizwa ngokuthi i-Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) .
Lokhu kuziphatha kwamaNazi kungabonakala ngezindlela ezimbili eziyinhloko. Ukuze uqonde lokhu, bheka ithebula elingezansi.
| Uhlobo lobuNazi | Izici kanye nokuziphatha |
|---|---|
| Ukuzikhukhumeza Okukhulu | Laba balingiswa esibacabangayo uma sizwa igama elithi 'Nazism'. Bazethemba kakhulu, bazama ukuthola ukunakwa yiwo wonke umuntu, bacabanga ukuthi bakhulu futhi babalulekile. Bahle ekuqhubekeni phambili emphakathini nasekuthatheni ubuholi. |
| Ukuzikhukhumeza Okusengozini | Laba bantu bahlukile kulokho ababonakala beyikho. Banozwela kakhulu, bahlala bekhathazekile. Bahlala bezibuza ukuthi abanye bazokwamukela noma bazokwazisa yini. Bazizwa bekhethekile, kodwa bayadabuka ukuthi umhlaba awukuboni. Banozwela kakhulu ekugxekweni. |
| Izici ezivamile zazo zombili izinhlobo | Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi hlobo luni, izici ezimbili ezifanayo ukuntuleka kozwela kanye nomuzwa wokufaneleka . |
Sifike kanjani lapha?
Abacwaningi bathi kunezizathu eziningana zalokhu kwanda. Esinye "inhlangano yokuzethemba" eyaqala emazweni aseNtshonalanga ngawo-1970. Izingane zazitshelwa kusukela zisencane ukuthi "ukhethekile" nokuthi "ungenza noma yini." Nakuba lokhu kwakunenhloso enhle, ngezinye izikhathi kwakuholela ekucabangeni okukhukhumele, okunobugovu kunokwandisa amakhono ezingane. Ucwaningo luye lwathola nokuthi lapho abazali "behlola ngokweqile" izingane zabo, okungukuthi, lapho bezincoma ngaphezu kwalokho amakhono azo afanele, izingane zamukela leyo mibono efanayo futhi zithuthukise izici zokuzikhukhumeza.
Ngemuva kwalokho, ngokufika kwezinhlelo ze-TV ezingokoqobo kanye nokwanda kwezokuxhumana, lesi simo sashintsha kakhulu. Kwaba yinto evamile ukuveza obala konke ngempilo yomuntu siqu, ukuthatha izithombe zakhe, nokugxila ekubukekeni kwakhe.
Kodwa ochwepheshe bathi esikhundleni sokwandisa izici zabantu zobuNazi, lezi zinto zinikeze labo asebenazo lezo zimfanelo inkundla enkulu yokuziveza.
Lokho kusho ukuthi, inani labantu abangobuNazi emphakathini kungenzeka alizange likhuphuke. Kodwa izwi labo kanye nethonya labo kukhuphuke kakhulu ngenxa yezokuxhumana . Ngakho-ke siyabona ukuthi wonke umuntu unjalo.
Iyini ithonya langempela lezokuxhumana?
Imithombo yezokuxhumana iyindawo yabantu abanezici zokuzikhukhumeza. Ucwaningo lukhombisile ukuthi abantu abanezici zokuzikhukhumeza bachitha isikhathi esiningi ezinkundleni zokuxhumana, bathumela kaningi, banabangane abaningi, futhi banamathuba amaningi okuba umlutha ezinkundleni zokuxhumana.
Kodwa umphumela walokhu kwabanye uyingozi.
- Ukuqhathanisa Nokukhathazeka : Umuzwa wokudabuka nokukhathazeka ngempilo yakho uma ubheka izimpilo zabanye "ezihlungiwe" nezibonakala zijabulisa. Siphinde sikubize lokhu ngokuthi i-FOMO (Ukwesaba Ukuphuthelwa).
- Izinkinga zempilo yengqondo: Lokhu kuqhathaniswa okuqhubekayo kuholele ekwandeni kokucindezeleka, ukukhathazeka, kanye nesizungu phakathi kwentsha.
- Izimo zengqondo ezingalungile ngomzimba:Imizimba "ephelele" ebonakala ezinkundleni zokuxhumana isibe yimbangela enkulu yokwanda kwe-body dysmorphia, isimo lapho amantombazane nabafana abancane bekhathazeka ngokweqile ngokubukeka kwabo ngokomzimba futhi becabanga ngamaphutha abangenawo.
Kwenzekani "Kubantu Abathanda Ukuzikhukhumeza Abasengozini"
Izinkundla zokuxhumana ziyindawo enzima kakhulu "kumaNarcissist Asengozini." Babona amaNarcissist Amakhulu" egubha impumelelo yawo futhi ethumela izithombe ezinhle, futhi bazizwa benomona futhi bethukuthele ngokuthi abatholi ukuqashelwa okufanayo. Lokhu kunomthelela omubi kakhulu empilweni yabo yengqondo.
Enye into edabukisayo ukuthi abazali babelana ngayo yonke into eyenziwa yizingane zabo, yonke into encane kusukela ngosuku abazalwa ngalo, ezinkundleni zokuxhumana. Kungumbuzo obalulekile ukuthi imiphumela yokubonisa konke emhlabeni ngaphandle kokunikeza ingane ithuba lobumfihlo bayo izoyithinta kanjani ingane esikhathini esizayo.
Ngakho-ke, senzani ngalokhu?
Lokhu kungase kuzwakale kuyesabisa kuwe. Kodwa kunezindaba ezinhle. Ucwaningo lubonisa ukuthi njengoba sikhula, njengoba sithatha imithwalo yemfanelo eyengeziwe (umshado, izingane), futhi njengoba sibhekene nezingqinamba empilweni, ukuzikhukhumeza ngokwemvelo kuncipha. Lokhu kungenxa yokuthi siphoqeleka ukucabanga ngabanye ngaphezu kwethu.
Kodwa-ke, uma wena noma othile omaziyo ehlushwa yilesi simo, kunezinto ezimbalwa ongazenza.
- Nciphisa ukusetshenziswa kwakho kwezokuxhumana: Qaphela ukusetshenziswa kwakho kwezokuxhumana kanye nokwezingane zakho. Khumbula njalo ukuthi akuyona yonke into oyibonayo eyiqiniso, nokuthi yindawo ekhombisa okuhle kakhulu empilweni yabantu.
- Lalela i-radar yakho yangaphakathi: Uma ukhuluma nothile, uma uzwa ukuthi ukhuluma kakhulu ngaye, udelela abanye, noma akanandaba nemizwa yakhe, qaphela lawo "ma-vibes okuzikhukhumeza." Uma kungenzeka, zihlukanise kancane nabantu abanjalo.
- Funa iseluleko sochwepheshe: Abantu abanesifo sobuntu obuzikhukhumezayo (i-NPD) abavamile ukuvuma ukuthi banenkinga. Yingakho bevame ukufuna ukwelashwa. Kodwa-ke, uma unomuzwa wokuthi unalezi zici ekuziphatheni kwakho, noma ukuthi umuntu onezici zokuzikhukhumeza uthinta impilo yakho yengqondo, kubalulekile ukungabi namahloni futhi ufune iseluleko kudokotela ofanelekayo noma kumeluleki wezempilo yengqondo. Kuyinto engcono kakhulu ongazenzela yona.
Umlayezo Wokuya Nawe Ekhaya
- Ukuzikhukhumeza kuyisici sobuntu esihlukahluka ngobukhulu kuye ngomuntu nomuntu. Nakuba ukuzethemba okuncane kuhle, ukucabanga ngawe kuphela ngaphandle kokunaka imizwa yabanye kuyalimaza.
- Imithombo yezokuxhumana ayizange ibangele "ubhubhane" lwamaNazi. Kodwa-ke, labo abanalezo zimfanelo banikezwe inkundla enkulu yokuziveza.
- Ungaziqhathanisi njalo nalokho okubona ezinkundleni zokuxhumana. Kungaba nomthelela omkhulu empilweni yakho yengqondo (ukucindezeleka, ukukhathazeka).
- Uma wena noma othile oseduze nawe ezwa ukungakhululeki ngenxa yalezi zindlela zokuziphatha, funa usizo lochwepheshe. Ukukhuluma nodokotela womndeni wakho kuyisinyathelo sokuqala esihle.
💬 Comments (0)
Awekho amazwana athunyelwe okwamanje. Faka amazwana akho lapha okokuqala ngqa.
Engeza amazwana akho