Usuku lwakho luhamba kanjani? Zinike isikhashana ucabange ngezinto ohlangabezane nazo namuhla. Uma ungakwazi, thatha ipeni nephepha bese ubhala phansi izenzakalo ezimbalwa ezingasoze zalibaleka. Ake sibone ukuthi ubhaleni.
Ngakho-ke, wawucabangani? Ingabe usuku lwakho lwalugcwele izikhathi ezinhle kakhulu? Mhlawumbe into efana nokuthi, “Namuhla belumnandi! Ugogo upheke i-pittu emnandi yesidlo sasekuseni, ngichithe isikhathi nabangani esikoleni, futhi isikhathi sesiNgisi besimnandi!” Noma ingabe ingqondo yakho yagxila ezintweni ezingahambanga kahle? Njengokuthi, “Ukupheka kukagogo kungenze ngaphuza, ngaphuthelwa yibhasi, futhi abangane bami babelokhu bekhuluma ngohlelo lwe-TV oluyisicefe ngesikhathi sasemini. Ngaphezu kwalokho, besinesiNgisi! Angizithandi ngempela ngoLwesine!” Indlela ochaza ngayo lezi zenzakalo inencazelo ebalulekile.
Sisho ukuthini ngethemba kanye nokuphelelwa yithemba?
Kalula nje, ukuba nethemba kanye nokuphelelwa yithemba kuyizindlela ezimbili ezahlukene zokuqonda nokucabanga ngezwe. Ziyizindlela zokucabanga ezihlukene ngokuphelele.
Umuntu onethemba uhlala efuna uhlangothi oluhle lwezinto. Balindele imiphumela emihle futhi bakholelwa ukuthi banamakhono kanye nekhono lokuthonya imicimbi ibe ngcono. Kukhona umqondo oyisisekelo wokuthi, “Ngingakwazi ukubhekana nalokhu,” endleleni yabo yokwenza izinto.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, abantu abavame ukugxila emaphutheni noma ukubona konke ngeso elibi yibo esibabiza ngokuthi “abangathembi lutho.” Umuntu ongethembi lutho uvame ukulindela ukuthi izinto zizohamba kabi futhi agxile ekuhlulekeni noma ezithiyweni. Umcabango oqhubekayo wokuthi “lokhu ngeke kuphumelele” uvame ukuhlala engqondweni yakhe.
Nokho, kubalulekile ukuqaphela ukuthi akekho umuntu onethemba noma ongenathemba ngaso sonke isikhathi. Sonke siwela endaweni ethile. Izindaba ezinhle kakhulu ukuthi noma ngabe uthambekele ekuphelelweni ithemba, akudingeki uhlale lapho! Sonke singafunda ukushintsha umbono wethu futhi sihlakulele umbono onethemba kakhudlwana. Kuyikhono elingafundwa.
Kungani ukucabanga okuhle kuzuzisa kangaka kuwe?
Abacwaningi nososayensi baye bafunda abantu abanethemba iminyaka eminingi. Ngokusho kwabo, ukugcina isimo sengqondo sokuthemba kukusiza ukuthi uhlale ujabule , uphumelele empilweni, futhi uhlale unempilo enhle.
Cabanga ngalezi zinzuzo zokucabanga okuhle:
- Impilo Yengqondo : Ukuba nethemba kusebenza njengesivikelo esingakuvikela ezimweni ezinjengokucindezeleka . Ngisho noma unesifo esinjalo, ukucabanga okuhle kungaba yinto ebalulekile ekuvikeleni.
- Ukuqina Kokucindezeleka: Umbono onethemba unikeza amandla okubhekana nezingcindezi zokuphila, noma ukucindezeleka . Lapho kuvela inkinga, esikhundleni sokwethuka, ingqondo yakho ithola indlela ehlukile yokubheka isimo.
- Ubude Besikhathi: Ungase umangale, kodwa ucwaningo lubonisa ukuthi ukucabanga okuhle kungasiza nasekuphileni impilo ende. Kuyithuluzi elihle kakhulu lempilo enempilo nejabulisayo.
- Kuyikhono Elifundwayo: Okuhle kunakho konke, noma ngabe izindlela zakho zokucabanga bezilokhu zingenathemba ngokomlando, ukuba nethemba kuyinto ongayifunda futhi uziqeqeshele ukuyamukela.
"Ukuba nethemba akuyona nje indlela yokucabanga; kuyisihluthulelo sempilo enempilo."
Abantu abanethemba kanye nabangenathemba bazibona kanjani izenzakalo?
Ukuba nethemba akukhona nje ukubona uhlangothi oluhle noma ukulindela imiphumela emihle, kodwa kumayelana nendlela esizicubungula futhi sizichaze ngayo izehlakalo esezenzekile kakade.
Cabanga ngalokhu: Uma kwenzeka okuthile okuhle, abantu abanethemba bathi lokhu kungenxa yemizamo namakhono abo. Babona amandla abo njengezingxenye zabo ezihlala njalo nezizinzile. Baphinde bacabangele ukuthi le mpumelelo ingavula kanjani iminyango yemiphumela emihle eyengeziwe. Isibonelo, uma uphumelela isivivinyo, umuntu onethemba angase acabange, “Ngiphumelele ngoba ngisebenze kanzima. Ngiyakwazi ukufeza lezi zinto, futhi lokhu kuzongisiza ngithole umsebenzi omuhle kamuva.”
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, uma izinto zingahambi njengoba kuhleliwe , ukusabela kuhlukile. Abantu abanethemba abazigxeki. Babona izithiyo njengezesikhashana . Uma kukhona okungahambi kahle, umuntu onethemba ukuxhumanisa nesimo esithile kunokuba kube ukwehluleka komuntu siqu. Ngenxa yokuthi abazifaki lezi zithiyo ngaphakathi, bangcono kakhulu ekubuyeleni emuva ngenxa yokudumala kunabantu abanethemba.
Cabanga ngalesi sibonelo: UNimal noSupun bobabili bayazama eqenjini lebhasikidi lesikole. Akekho kubo ofikayo. Bobabili badumele, kodwa ukusabela kwabo kuyahluka.
UNimal ungumuntu onethemba. Ucabanga ukuthi: “Bekunabantu abaningi abanamakhono kuma-tryout, futhi bekunezindawo ezimbalwa kuphela. Ngizilolonge kanzima futhi ngazizwa sengathi ngidlale kahle! Umqeqeshi unginike impendulo enhle. Ngizosebenza ezindaweni azishilo futhi ngibukele yonke imidlalo kule sizini. Lokho kuzonginika ithuba elingcono ngonyaka ozayo.”
Uyabona lokho? UNimal ugxila esimweni esithile, hhayi ekufanelekeni kwakhe. Akakuboni lokhu njengombuso ohlala njalo. Ulindele ukungena eqenjini ngonyaka ozayo futhi usevele uhlela ukuthi angakwenza kanjani.
USupun uthambekele ekuphelelweni yithemba. Ucabanga ukuthi: “Akumangazi ukuthi angiphumelelanga—ngangingumdlali omubi kakhulu kuma-tryout, futhi umqeqeshi cishe akangithandi. Akukho lutho olungihambela kahle. Kufanele ngivume ukuthi angisiye umdlali omuhle.” Ngokungafani noNimal, uSupun uthatha lesi simo mathupha. Uzisola futhi uzizwa sengathi amandla angaphandle (umqeqeshi, impilo) asebenza ngokumelene naye. Okubi nakakhulu, lesi sigameko esisodwa simenza angabaze lonke ikhono lakhe lezemidlalo.
Manje, ngitshele: ubani ongase ahlale edumele isikhathi eside? Ngubani ongase aqeqeshwe futhi azame futhi? Futhi ubani ongase ayeke? Impendulo icacile, akunjalo?
Ukucabanga okuhle kukwakha kanjani ukuqina kwakho?
Ukucabanga okuhle kusenza sikwazi ukubheka izehlakalo ezikhungathekisayo njengezimo zesikhashana , kusinika inkolelo yokuthi singazinqoba. Lokhu kuqinisa ukuzimisela kwethu ukuzama futhi esikhundleni sokuyeka. Kugcina imigomo namaphupho ethu ephila futhi kusinika amandla okuzimisela. Ngenxa yalokho, abantu abanethemba bazizwa belawula kakhulu izimo zabo, futhi ukuzethemba kwabo kuphakeme kakhulu. Banomqondo wangempela wokuzethemba.
Ngakolunye uhlangothi, ukucabanga okungekuhle kusishukumisela ukuba sithathe ukudumazeka kanye nokwenqatshwa mathupha. Kusenza kubonakale njengezinto ezihlala njalo kunezehlakalo ezidlulayo. Umbono ongekuhle ukhulisa izici ezimbi zesimo, uvame ukumboza noma yiziphi izici ezinhle. Uma izinto zingahambi njengoba bekulindelekile, lo mqondo wenza kube nzima kakhulu ukubhekana nazo.
Ingabe ukuba nethemba kumane nje kukubona konke ngezibuko ezinombala we-rose? (Ithemba Elingokoqobo)
Cha, akukhona lokho okushoyo. Ukuba nethemba akusho ukubuka yonke into ngezibuko ezinombala obomvu noma ukwenza sengathi impilo iyinganekwane. Abantu abanethemba abazishayi indiva izinselele zokuphila, futhi abenzi sengathi konke kuphelele. Kunalokho, bagxila ekuboneni okuhle kunoma yisiphi isimo nokuqaphela izinyathelo abangazithatha ukuze bathuthukise izinto.
Abantu abanethemba banokuzethemba kwangempela , okuvela ekulungiseleleni. Bayaqonda ukuthi ukuphumelela isivivinyo esinzima kudinga ukutadisha ngenkuthalo, njengoba nje bazi ukuthi ukwakha iqembu lebhasikidi kudinga ukuzijwayeza okuzinikele.
Kalula nje, ukuba nethemba kugxile esenzweni. Kumayelana nokuthola ibhalansi enempilo phakathi kokucabanga okuhle kanye nokuba ngokoqobo okusekelwe.
Ingabe ngempela kudingeka umbono wokuphelelwa yithemba?
Nakuba ukucabanga okungekuhle kungakuvimba—futhi kubalulekile ukwazi ukuthi ungayishintsha leyo ndlela yokucabanga—akusho ukuthi udinga ukususa yonke imicabango emibi ngokuphelele.
Ngezinye izikhathi, ukubuza ukuthi “Kwenzenjani?” kusisiza ukuthi sithole inkinga ngokunembile. Ukuzindla ngezingozi ezingaba khona kungakuvikela ekulimaleni okungadingekile.
Cabanga ngale ndlela: Umfowenu uthumela imiyalezo ngenkathi ekushayela endaweni ethile. Isimo sakho sengqondo esingesihle nesiqaphile siyakuxwayisa: “Lokhu akuphephile!” Bese umcela ukuthi ayeke, hhayi nje ngenxa yokuphepha kwakhe, kodwa nangenxa yakho. Kulesi sikhathi, uhlanganisa umcabango wokuphelelwa yithemba (“Uma ethumela imiyalezo ngenkathi eshayela, singase sibe nengozi”) nesenzo sokuthemba (“Ngiyazi ukuthi kukhona engingakwenza ukuze ngiyeke lokhu.”)
Sonke sidlula ezinkingeni lapho kungekho lutho olubonakala luhamba kahle. Uma uzizwa udikibele, kuyasiza ukuvuma imizwa yakho bese uxoxa ngokuthi yini engalungile. Ukukhuluma nomuntu omethembayo kungenza umthwalo wakho wengqondo ube lula futhi kukusize ugxile emathubeni amahle. Into ebaluleke kakhulu ukungabambeki enkingeni uqobo lwayo. Uma uphatha lokhu, ngisho nokucabanga okubi kungaba yisisusa sokuqhubekela phambili.
Ungaba kanjani nethemba elikhudlwana?
Uma uzithola uthambekele ngokwemvelo ekubeni nombono ongemuhle, ungaziqeqesha ukuze ubone okuhle. Nazi izinto ezimbalwa ongazizama:
- Qaphela futhi ubonge izinto ezinhle. Ekupheleni kosuku ngalunye, zinike imizuzu eyi-10 ukuzindla nokubona izinto ezimbalwa ozibongayo ngazo. Zibhale phansi encwadini noma usebenzise uhlelo lokusebenza olukhuthazayo efonini noma kuthebhulethi yakho. Ngisho nezinto ezincane ziyabaluleka—njengomuntu omomothekayo namuhla.
- Qeqesha ingqondo yakho ukuthi ikholelwe ukuthi ungathonya imiphumela emihle. Zijwayeze ukuzitshela izenzo ezithile ongazithatha ukuze uphumelele. Isibonelo: “Uma ngifunda, ngingathola amamaki amahle.” “Uma ngizijwayeza, ngizodlala kahle ekhonsathini.” “Uma ngijoyina lelo qembu lokuzithandela, ngizohlangana nabangani abasha.”
- Ungazibeki icala uma izinto zingahambi kahle. Uma izinto zingahambi njengoba bekuhleliwe, lalela inkulumo yakho yangaphakathi. Esikhundleni sokucabanga ukuthi, “Ngihlulekile ukuhlolwa ngoba angikwazi kahle izibalo,” zama ukuthi, “Ngihlulekile ngoba angifundanga ngokwanele. Ngeke ngivumele lokho kuphinde kwenzeke.” Esikhundleni sokucabanga ukuthi, “Bangishiyile ngoba angilutho,” zama ukuthi: “Ngiyaqonda ukuthi kungani lokhu kuhlukana kubuhlungu, kodwa ukuchitha isikhathi nabangani bami kuzongisiza ngizizwe ngingcono.”
- Uma into ihamba kahle, zinike udumo. Cabanga ngalokho okwenzile ukuze uthole umphumela omuhle. Ulungiselele kahle? Uziqeqeshe ngokuzinikela? Qaphela amandla akho nokuthi akusize kanjani ukuba uphumelele. Ungesabi ukuthi, “Ngikwenzile lokhu!”
- Zikhumbuze ukuthi izinkinga zingezesikhashana. Uma kukhona okungahambi kahle, zikhumbuze ukuthi kuzodlula—bese udala uhlelo lokwenza lokho kwenzeke. Isibonelo: “Imiphumela yami yokuhlolwa ayiyona into ebengiyilindele, kodwa ngingafunda kanzima futhi ngibhale ukuhlolwa futhi.”
- Qaphela indlela abanye abakhuluma ngayo ngabo. Ingabe abangani bakho nomndeni wakho banethemba noma abanathemba? Isibonelo, ingabe ubaba wakho uthi, “Ngishise ama-hot dog, ngingumpheki omubi kakhulu!” noma uthi, “Ngishise ama-hot dog ngoba ngiphazamisekile ngibuka inja ixosha i-squirrel!”
Zama ukufaka le mikhuba empilweni yakho. Kungase kuzwakale kunzima ekuqaleni, kodwa ngokuzijwayeza, uzoqala ukubona umehluko.
Umyalezo Wokuya Nawo Ekhaya
Njengoba ubona, ukuba nethemba kuyindlela yokucabanga engafundwa. Lokhu kusho nokuthi ukuphelelwa ithemba kuyinto ongayifunda !
Le nqubo ithatha isikhathi, ngakho ungadikibali. Njengoba uqaphela kakhudlwana lezi zindlela ezimbili zokucabanga, uzothola izindlela eziningi zokuhlakulela ithemba. Qhubeka uzitshela ukuthi, “Ngingaba nethemba kakhudlwana, futhi ngizoqhubeka nokuzijwayeza!”
Khumbula, isinyathelo ngasinye esincane sibalulekile. Yonke imizamo oyenzayo yokushintsha umbono wakho ikusondeza empilweni yenjabulo, impumelelo, kanye nenhlalakahle . Ngakho-ke, ingabe kufanele siqale lolu hambo olunethemba namuhla? Usunalo lolu!
