Di pen ɛn di wangren we wi kin fil we wi lɔs pɔsin we de nia wi ɛn lɛk am, i nɔ kin izi fɔ tɔk bɔt, nɔto so? Na di sem tin we wi gɛt big lɔs na wi layf bikɔs ɔf aksidɛnt ɔ natura disasta. Dis dip sɔri-at ɛn pen na wetin wi kin kɔl "grif." Dis na nɔmal tin, bɔt sɔntɛnde dis pwɛl hat kin kam tumɔs fɔ bia. So tide, lɛ wi tɔk bɔt wetin na sɔri-at ɛn aw wi go gɛt ɛp fɔ bia wit am.
Wetin na Kɔnsul fɔ Gɛt Sɔri?
Fɔ tɔk am simpul wan, fɔ advays yu bɔt pwɛl hat na prɔfɛshɔnal tritmɛnt wae de ɛp yu fɔ dil wit ɛn kɔntrol de dip sɔri ɛn pen wae yu de fil. I de ɛp yu fɔ ɔndastand aw yu de fil, nɔr de fɛt am, ɛn liv wit yu nyu rialiti.
Wan dɔktɔ we de mɛn pipul dɛn we gɛt sik dɛn we dɛn kɔl Elisabeth Kubler-Ross, bin tɔk bɔt fayv men tin dɛn we kin mek pɔsin fil bad insay 1969. Pan ɔl we nɔto ɔlman kin go tru ɔl dɛn tin ya ɔdasay, i impɔtant fɔ no bɔt dɛn.
- Denial: Tink se, "No, dis no fit de hapun."
- Vɛks : Fɔ fil vɛks pan yusɛf, ɔda pipul dɛn, ɛn ivin Gɔd, fɔ aks se, "Wetin mek dis apin to mi?"
- Bargaining: Tray fɔ chenj di situeshɔn bay we yu de tink tin dɛn lɛk, "If a bin dɔn du dis, i bin fɔ stil de ya."
- Pwɛl hat: I kin fil bad bad wan, yu wan de fil, ɛn nɔr kin bisin bɔt ɛnitin.
- Akseptans: Fɔ gri se di lɔs dɔn apin ɛn mek yu maynd fɔ go bifo wit da rial tin de.
Mɛmba se ɔlman kin fil bad difrɛn we. No tɛm ɔ ɔda tin nɔ de we dɛn dɔn sɛt fɔ dis. Sɔm pipul dɛn kin gɛt tu ɔr tri pan dɛn tin ya, ɛn ɔda pipul dɛn kin gɛt dis pwɛl hat difrɛn we.
Insay dis tɛm, yu kin gɛt sɔm sayn dɛn bak lɛk:
- Fɔ fil se yu gɛt strɔng shɔk
- Di we aw pɔsin nɔ biliv
- Fɔ wɔri ɛn nɔ gɛt rɛst
- Siriɔs strɛs na yu maynd
- Nɔ ebul slip
- Fil fɔ it
If dɛn filin ya de mek i nɔr izi fɔ yu fɔ woke na yu ɛvride layf, na sayn fɔ sho se yu nid ɛp. Sɔm pipul kin wɛl insay 6 mɔnt, bɔt ɔda wan kin tek wan ia ɔr pas dat.
Yu tink se difrɛn kayn sɔri-at de?
Yɛs, di kayn we aw pɔsin kin fil bad kin difrɛn fɔ di kayn tin we wi kin lɔs ɛn di rilayshɔnship we wi bin gɛt wit da pɔsin ɔ tin de. Lɛ wi luk sɔm pan di men kayn dɛn.
Kɔmplikɛt Sɔri-at
Bɔku pipul dɛn kin lan aw fɔ kɔntrol dɛn pwɛl at as tɛm de go. Bɔt fɔ sɔm pipul dɛm (lɛk 15%) dis pwɛl hat kin te fɔ wan ia ɔr mɔr, ɛn kin rili bad. Dɛn kɔl dis kɔmplikɛt sɔri-at . I kin mek i nɔ izi fɔ mek wi wok na layf ɛvride.
| Di kwaliti dɛn we pɔsin kin gɛt we i gɛt kɔmplikɛt sɔri-at | |
|---|---|
| Fɔ fil bad bad wan ɛn fɔ kɔntinyu fɔ fil bad ɛn fɔ fil pen na yu maynd. | Ɔltɛm we yu de wish se yu go mit di pɔsin we dɔn lɔs bak. |
| Fɔ fil ɛmti ɛn nɔ gɛt op fɔ layf. | Fɔ tink ɔltɛm bɔt di pɔsin we mis ɔ aw i day. |
| I nɔ kin izi fɔ mɛmba ivin di gud mɛmori dɛn we di pɔsin we dɔn lɔs bin mɛmba wit gladi at. | Fɔ avɔyd ɛnitin (ples, prɔpati) we de mɛmba yu bɔt di pɔsin we dɔn mis. |
| Wae pɔrsin nɔr de fil bɔt insɛf, wae pɔrsin kin fil se i dɔn lɔs in aydentiti. | Tray fɔ de yu wan, fa frɔm yu padi ɛn fambul dɛn. |
Grif we kin mek pɔsin fil bad
Imajin aw yu go fil if yu lɔs pɔsin we yu lɛk we yu nɔ bin de tink, lɛk we aksidɛnt apin, ɔ if yu si di tin we apin wit yu yon yay. Dɛn kin kɔl di pwɛl hat we kin apin pan dis kayn tin . Sɔntɛnde, dɛn filin ya kin apin sɔm awa, sɔm dez, ɔ ivin sɔm wiks afta di tin apin. Dis kin rili at ɛn mek yu fred fɔ bia wit am. If yu de gɛt dis, go to yu dɔktɔ wantɛm wantɛm ɛn aks fɔ ɛp.
Brek Hat Sindrom we pɔsin kin gɛt
Pan ɔl we sɔri-at nɔ kin kil pɔsin, di strɛs we pɔsin kin gɛt we i shɔk wantɛm wantɛm kin afɛkt di at. We yu fil bad bad wan, yu bɔdi kin pul bɔku ɔmon dɛn we de mek yu strɛs. Dis kin mek wan pat pan yu at swel ɛn yu blɔd nɔ kin pɔmp ɔltɛm. Yu kin gɛt pen bak na yu chɛst, we tan lɛk we yu gɛt at atak. Dɛn kɔl dis sik we dɛn kɔl brok at syndrome . Bɔt nɔ wɔri, bɔku pipul dɛn kin wɛl insay sɔm wiks.
Di rilayshɔn bitwin pwɛl hat ɛn pwɛl hat
De sayn dɛm wae de sho se pɔrsin fil bad, lɛk wae pɔrsin fil bad, wae pɔrsin de wɔri, ɛn wae pɔrsin nɔr gɛt op, kin rili fiba wae pɔrsin gɛt pwɛl hat. Bɔt dɛn tin ya kin difrɛn. Bɔt, pwɛl hat kin mek bak in at pwɛl, ɛn dis kin mek di pwɛl hat wɔs. So, if yu gɛt dɛn kayn sik ya, i rili impɔtant fɔ tɔk to dɔktɔ, saykayatrist, ɔ advaysa.
Us we dɛn kin yuz fɔ advays pipul dɛn bɔt sɔri-at?
Fo men gol dɛn de fɔ advays bɔt pwɛl hat:
- Fɔ ɛp fɔ gri se di tin we pɔsin lɔs na rial tin.
- Gayd fɔ dil wit di pen we pɔsin kin fil we i de fil bad.
- Fɔ ɛp fɔ ajɔst to layf we di pɔsin we dɔn lɔs nɔ de.
- Fɔ fɛn we fɔ go bifo na layf, pan ɔl we yu de kip di tayt padi biznɛs wit di pɔsin we dɔn lɔs na yu at.
Fɔ dis, sayɛnsman ɔ advaysa dɛn kin yuz we dɛn lɛk Kɔgnitiv Biɛvhɔral Tɛrapi (CBT) ɔ Saykotɛrapi .
| Di we aw dɛn de gi advays | Tɔk bɔt |
|---|---|
| We i de tɔk bɔt di tɔk we dɛn tɔk | A de ɛnkɔrej yu fɔ tɔk bɔt di pɔsin we yu lɔs, di pɔsin we yu lɔs, ɛn di tin dɛn we apin we mek yu day. |
| Fɔ no aw pɔsin de fil | Dɛn kin aks yu fɔ tɔk bɔt de filin wae yu de fil (sɔri, vɛks, fil gilti). |
| Strateji fɔ mek dɛn nɔ gɛt di sik | Dɛn kin mek di we aw fɔ bia wit di prɔblɛm fɔ dil wit spɛshal de dɛn lɛk batde ɛn anivesari. |
| Fɔ no di bad we aw pɔsin de biev | Fɔ no ɛn ɛp fɔ win di bad bad tin dɛn we kin ambɔg pɔsin ɛvride. |
| Fɔ bil nyu aydentiti | I de ɛp yu fɔ bil nyu rilayshɔnship ɛn mek yu gɛt nyu aydentiti na layf. |
Aw fɔ ɛp pikin dɛn fɔ bia wit pwɛl at?
Pikin dɛn kin gɛt sɔri-at difrɛn we pas big pipul dɛn. Fɔs, dɛn nɔr kin ɔndastand di lɔs ɛn di impak we i kin gɛt pan dɛn layf. Dɛn kin lan fɔ kray bay we dɛn de wach big pipul dɛn. So, i impɔtant fɔ bi ɔnɛs ɛn tɔk dairekt wan we yu de tɔk to pikin bɔt dis.
If yu lɔs pɔsin we yu lɛk, i impɔtant fɔ go to pɔsin we de gi advays to pikin dɛn fɔ ɛp yu fɔ lan aw fɔ bia wit pwɛl hat fayn fayn wan. Yu kin tek pat bak pan famili tritmɛnt as famili. Yu kin ɛp yu pikin bak fɔ ɔndastand dis lɔs tru tin dɛn lɛk fɔ tɛl stori ɛn fɔ ple.
Aw a go gɛt advays?
If yu pwɛl hat de pasmak ɛn mek i nɔr izi fɔ yu fɔ woke, i go fayn fɔ mek yu go to pɔsin we sabi du in wok. I nɔ kin ɛva tu ali ɔ let fɔ aks fɔ ɛp. Bɔt di mɔ we yu go fɛn ɛp kwik kwik wan, na di mɔ yu go ebul fɔ gɛt di trɛnk we yu nid fɔ bia wit di prɔblɛm kwik kwik wan.
Yu kin tɔk to yu famili dɔktɔ ɛn gɛt riferal to wan kwalifay sayɛnsman ɔ advaysa. Yu kin gɛt ɛp bak frɔm di mental wɛlbɔdi yunit dɛm na gɔvmɛnt ɔspitul dɛm. Di tin we impɔtant pas ɔl na fɔ aks fɔ ɛp ɛn nɔ fɔ sɔfa yu wan.
Mɛsej we dɛn kin kɛr go na os
- I rili nɔmal fɔ mek pɔsin fil bad we pɔsin we wi lɛk day. I nɔto wikɛd tin.
- Ɔlman kin kray difrɛn we ɛn di tɛm we i kin tek kin difrɛn. Nɔ kɔmpia yusɛf to ɔda pipul dɛn.
- If yu pen so bad dat e de mek yu nɔr de du yu woke wae yu de du ɛvride, nɔr shem fɔ go to pɔrsin wae sabi du yu wok. Tɔk to yu dɔktɔ.
- Tek kia ɔf yu bɔdi ɛn maynd wɛlbɔdi insay dis tɛm. It fayn, ɛksesaiz as yu ebul, ɛn slip fayn.
- Peshɛnt wit yusɛf. Gi yusɛf tɛm fɔ wɛl.
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