Ngamanye amaxesha umntwana wakho omncinci unokucaphuka ngequbuliso evenkileni okanye ekhaya, aze akhale ngokungathi uphambene. Banokwenza izinto ngokungalawulekiyo bengamameli nantoni na oyithethayo. Njengomama, ungaziva ungenakunceda, uneentloni, kwaye ude ube nomsindo ngamaxesha anje. Enyanisweni, oku sikubiza ngokuba yi-'Temper Tantrum' ngokwezonyango. Nangona kubuhlungu ukubona oku, yinxalenye eqhelekileyo yophuhliso lwabantwana abancinci.
Yintoni kanye kanye 'i-Temper Tantrum'?
Ngamafutshane, 'Umsindo ovuthayo' yindlela umntwana wakho abonisa ngayo ukukhungatheka, umsindo, okanye iimvakalelo zakhe xa engakwazi ukufumana into ayifunayo. Abantwana abancinci, ingakumbi abo bangaphantsi kweminyaka emi-4 ubudala, abakwazi ukuchaza iimvakalelo zabo ngamazwi afana nathi. Ngoko ke le yindlela ababonakalisa ngayo umsindo wabo kunye nokungakwazi ukuzinceda.
Khawucinge nje, nangona befuna ukwenza into ngokwabo, abanazo izakhono ezifunekayo okwangoku. Oku kubabangela ukukhungatheka okukhulu. Le yinxalenye eqhelekileyo yophuhliso lwabo. Njengoko umntwana ekhula aze afunde ukuveza iimvakalelo zabo ngamazwi, le meko iya kuncipha kakhulu. Ngoko ke into yokuqala ekufuneka uyiqonde kukuba le ayisiyonto eyenziwa ngumntwana wakho kuba embi , yinxalenye yophuhliso lwakhe.
Uhlula njani phakathi kweemeko 'eziqhelekileyo' kunye 'nezingaqhelekanga'?
Abazali abaninzi bayazibuza ukuba le ndlela yokuziphatha iqhelekile na emntwaneni wabo, okanye kufuneka bathethe nogqirha ngayo. Ngokwesiqhelo, umntwana unokuziphatha ngolu hlobo xa ediniwe, elambile, okanye ngexesha lemisebenzi yakhe yemihla ngemihla, njengokulala okanye ukutya.
Nangona kunjalo, kukho iimpawu ezithile zesilumkiso ekufuneka siziqaphele.
| Isilumkiso | Kutheni ufanele ukhathazeke ngale nto? |
|---|---|
| Ukonakalisa abanye okanye impahla | Nokuba uzama ukubetha abazali bakho kube kanye okanye kabini xa ucaphukile, ukuba ubetha abanye okanye uphosa izinto phantsi njengoko ubuya kwenza xa unomsindo, oko kungaba yingxaki. |
| ukuzenzakalisa | Ukuba umntwana uyaziluma, uyazikrwempa, okanye uzibethelela intloko eludongeni, ezi ziimpawu ezinzulu. |
| Ubunzima bokuthomalalisa umsindo | Ukuba kufuneka uhlale umthatha umntwana ukuze umthomalalise, okanye umthembise ukumthengela into ethile, loo nto nayo yingxaki. |
| Ukwenzeka rhoqo | Kusenokuba yinto eqhelekileyo ukuba umntwana ophakathi kweminyaka eli-1 ukuya kwemine abe nomsindo omnye ngemini. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba oku kwenzeka amaxesha amaninzi ngemini, yinto ekufuneka iqwalaselwe. |
| Ukuhlala ixesha elide | Ukuba le ndlela yokuziphatha ihlala ixesha elingaphezu kwemizuzu eli-15, kunokubakho esinye isizathu esiyintloko. |
Yintoni enokubangela oku?
Kunokubakho izizathu eziqhelekileyo nezezonyango zokuba umntu abe nomsindo ovuthayo.
Izinto Ezixhaphakileyo
- Ulambile, udiniwe , okanye ugula.
- Ukukhathazeka ngenxa yokungakwazi ukugqiba umsebenzi.
- Ukungabi namazwi okuveza iimvakalelo zomntu.
- Ukuze ufumane ingqalelo yakho okanye ufumane into efana nethoyi oyithandayo.
- Xa usuka kwenye into uye kwenye (umz., ukuya kwigumbi lokuhlambela emva kokudlala).
Izizathu zokufuna unyango
Ngamanye amaxesha kunokubakho imeko yempilo ebangela le ndlela yokuziphatha.
- Ingxaki yokungakwazi ukunikel’ ingqalelo (ADHD)
- Ixhala
- Ukukhubazeka Kokufunda
- Iingxaki Zokucubungula Imvakalelo
- I-Autism
Ukongeza, iingxaki zokuziphatha ezifana ne-Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) kunye ne-Conduct Disorder (CD) zinokubangela ukuba abantwana babe nomsindo, baxabane, kwaye babe nenkohlakalo kwabanye. Ukuba unenkxalabo malunga nokuziphatha komntwana wakho, qiniseka ukuba uthetha nogqirha wakho.Uza kukuthumela kwingcali yezengqondo okanye kwingcali yezengqondo ukuba kuyimfuneko.
Ungayithintela njani ingqumbo ebangelwa ngumsindo?
Nangona singenakuyithintela yonke into ebangela umsindo, singazama ukuyinciphisa.
Endaweni yokufumana amabala kumntwana wakho, vuma kwaye uncome izinto ezintle azenzayo. Ulwalamano oluhle lolona nyango lubalaseleyo.
- Cwangcisa kwangaphambili: Musa ukuyenza umsebenzi, njengokuya evenkileni, xa umntwana wakho elambile okanye ediniwe. Thabatha isidlo esincinci okanye ithoyi nawe naphi na apho uya khona.
- Gcina ucwangciso oluhambelanayo: Beka ixesha elifanayo lezinto ezifana nokutya, ukulala, kunye nokuhlamba. Abantwana baziva bezolile ngakumbi xa besazi ukuba kuza kwenzeka ntoni emva koko.
- Nika umntwana wakho ukhetho: Vumela umntwana wakho enze izigqibo ezincinci nanini na xa kunokwenzeka. Xa ebuzwa into efana nokuthi, "Ufuna ukunxiba ihempe ebomvu okanye ihempe eluhlaza okwesibhakabhaka?", umntwana wakho uziva ngathi nguye olawulayo.
- Ncoma ukuziphatha kakuhle: Bamba ixesha umntwana wakho aziphethe kakuhle uze umncome. Yithi, "Ubunomdla kakhulu kwisidlo sasemini namhlanje." Endaweni yokubanika izinto njengezipho, yenza izinto ezinjengokubavumela ukuba bachithe ixesha elingakumbi nawe okanye ubavumele babukele imuvi abayithandayo.
Uyilawula njani ingqumbo?
Xa umntwana wakho eqala ukuba nomsindo, ufuna uncedo lwakho ukuze awulawule.
- Hlala uzolile: Ukuba ukhwaza okanye unomsindo, imeko iya kuba mandundu. Tsala umoya onzulu uze uzole.
- Phazamisa: Mnike ithoyi eyahlukileyo ngoko nangoko. Okanye umbonise intaka onokuyibona ngefestile.
- Mgobe umntwana wakho ngothando: Ukuba umntwana wakho uyasokola, uyasokola, okanye uza kuzilimaza okanye azenzakalise kwabanye, mbambe ngokuqinileyo ngothando ade azole.
- Musa ukuyihoya le ndlela yokuziphatha: Ukuba umntwana usendaweni ekhuselekileyo kwaye akonzakali, ngamanye amaxesha ungayihoya indlela aziphatha ngayo. Oku kuya kunceda umntwana afunde ukuba le ndlela yokuziphatha ayincedi. Nangona kunjalo, kubalulekile ukugcina umntwana ekufutshane .
- Cacisa imithetho kamva: Akuncedi ukumthethisa umntwana wakho xa enomsindo. Nje ukuba athobe umsindo, thetha naye ngothando malunga nento elungileyo.
Ufanele ufune nini ingcebiso kagqirha?
Ukuba ucinga ukuba ukuziphatha komntwana wakho kungaphaya kwemigangatho eqhelekileyo yokukhula, ungathandabuzi ukufuna ingcebiso kagqirha. Ukuba unezinye zezi mpawu zilandelayo, qiniseka ukuba ubona ugqirha wakho.
- Ukuba umntwana uyazilimaza (ukukrweleka, ukugruzuka, ukulunywa).
- Ukuba wena okanye abanye abantu abadala niyahlaselwa.
- Ukuba umntwana wakho uthunyelwa ekhaya evela esikolweni okanye esikolweni sabantwana abancinci ngenxa yokuziphatha kwakhe.
- Ukuba uziva usoyika ukhuseleko lwabanye abantu abakufutshane nomntwana.
- Ukuba uziva ungenakunceda ngenxa yezi ndlela zokuziphatha, ungaziva ngathi awukwazi ukulawula umntwana wakho.
Khumbula, njengomzali, awunakukwazi ukwenza yonke into wedwa. Ukucela uncedo akuyonto ibuthathaka. Yinxalenye yokuthanda umntwana wakho.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- Ukucaphuka ngokukhawuleza kubantwana abangaphantsi kweminyaka emi-4 ubudala kudla ngokuba yinxalenye eqhelekileyo nesempilweni yokukhula kwabo.
- Yiba nexhala ukuba umntwana wakho uzenzakalisa, unomsindo kwabanye, okanye unomsindo ohlala ixesha elide.
- Ukuqhuba rhoqo, ukunika ukhetho oluncinci, kunye nokuncoma ukuziphatha okuhle kunokunceda ekuthinteleni oku.
- Ngexesha lomsindo, eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuhlala uzolile kwaye uqinisekise ukhuseleko lomntwana.
- Ukuba ukhathazekile kakhulu okanye uziva ungenakunceda malunga nokuziphatha komntwana wakho, thetha nogqirha wakho ngaphandle kokuthandabuza.
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