Singakhuluma ngokuxhashazwa kwezingane? Ingabe ingane yakho nayo ayisengozini?

Namuhla sizokhuluma ngesihloko esibucayi kakhulu nesibalulekile. Lokho ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane, noma njengoba sisho ngesiNgisi, "Ukuhlukunyezwa Kwezingane". Kunzima ukuzwa lokhu, kodwa ukuqaphela lokhu kuzosiza kakhulu ekuvikeleni izingane zethu. Ngakho ake sibone ukuthi kuyini, kwenzeka kanjani, nokuthi yini okudingeka siyenze.

Kuyini lokhu kuhlukunyezwa kwezingane?

Kalula nje, ukuhlukunyezwa kwengane kuwukulimaza noma ukunganakwa kwengane ngamabomu . Ngokudabukisayo, isikhathi esiningi, lokhu kuhlukumeza kwenziwa ngumuntu ingane emazi kahle. Lokhu kungaba umzali, isihlobo esiseduze, umnakekeli, noma umngane womndeni. Emazweni amaningi njenge-United States, imithetho yokuhlukunyezwa kwezingane ithi noma yikuphi ukulimaza noma ukuphathwa kabi kwengane engaphansi kweminyaka engu-18 kuwukuhlukumeza futhi kuyicala lobugebengu. Elinye igama lalokhu yi-Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs). Uma lezi zimo zingaphathwa kahle, zingathinta impilo nenhlalakahle yengane impilo yayo yonke. Cabanga ngendlela into eyenzeka ebuntwaneni engayithinta ngayo impilo yayo yonke.

Ezinye izibalo ngodlame olubhekiswe ezinganeni

Lokhu kuvame kakhulu kunalokho esikucabangayo. Isibonelo, kulinganiselwa ukuthi ngo-2021, e-United States kuphela, cishe izingane ezingu-600,000 zahlukunyezwa. Ngonyaka ofanayo, izingane ezingu-1,820 zafa ngenxa yokuhlukunyezwa nokunganakwa. Lezi zibalo ziyethusa, akunjalo?

Ingabe lokhu kuwukwephulwa komthetho okukhulu?

Yebo, ukuhlukumeza izingane kuyicala ngaphansi komthetho. Kuye ngokuthi icala libucayi kangakanani, abashushisi bangase bakubheke njengecala elibi noma icala elibi . Kodwa-ke, ubugebengu obuningi bokuhlukumeza izingane bubhekwa njengamacala amakhulu.

Yiziphi izinhlobo zobudlova ezingase zenzeke ezinganeni?

Ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane kungafika ngezindlela eziningi. Ake sibheke izinhlobo eziyinhloko:

Ukuxhashazwa ngokomzimba kwengane

Lokhu kuhlanganisa ukushaya, ukusunduza, ukushaya, ukukhahlela, ukunyakazisa, nokushisa ingane. Kuhlanganisa nokungayiniki ingane ukudla noma isiphuzo, noma ukungamvumeli ukuthi asebenzise indlu yangasese. Cabanga ukuthi ingane encane ingaba usizo kangakanani uma lokhu kwenzeka kuyo.

Ukuhlukunyezwa kwengane ngokomzwelo

Lokhu kuvame ukwenzeka ngamazwi . Izibonelo zifaka phakathi ukuthethisa njalo, ukusola, ukuphoqa umuntu ukuba enze izinto angenakukwazi ukuzithwala, ukusongela, nokumemeza. Ngezinye izikhathi, noma ngabe isilonda esingokoqobo siyaphola, kuthatha isikhathi eside ukuphulukisa amanxeba enhliziyweni.

Ukuxhashazwa ngokocansi kwezingane

Lolu udaba olungathi sína kakhulu. Lokhu kufaka phakathi ukudlwengulwa kwengane, ukulala nezihlobo, ukuhlukumeza ngokomzimba, ubunqunu, ukusebenzisa ingane ukuze ibukele izithombe zobulili ezingcolile, noma ukudalula ingane ezithombeni zobulili ezingcolile . Lezi zinto zingaguqula impilo yonke yengane ibe yimbi.

Ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane ngokwezokwelapha

Lokhu kungase kubonakale kungavamile, kodwa kuyenzeka. Okusho ukuthi, ukuzama ngamabomu ukugulisa ingane, noma ukungayilaphi isifo sengane.

Ukunganakwa kwengane

Ukuncisha ingane izidingo eziyisisekelo zokudla, indawo yokuhlala, imfundo, ukunakekelwa kwezokwelapha kanye nokusekelwa ngokomzwelo nakho kuwukuhlukumeza. Uma ingane ingatholi ngisho nalezi zidingo eziyisisekelo, kunomthelela omkhulu ekukhuleni kwayo.

Ingabe ukushaya ingane nakho kuyayihlukumeza?

Lesi yisihloko esivame ukuphikiswana ngaso. Kunemibono ehlukene ngokuthi ukushaya ingane ukuze uyijezise kuwukuhlukumeza noma cha. Amanye amazwe anemithetho ehlukene ngalokhu. Kodwa-ke, uma ukushaya kubangela ukulimala, imivimbo, ukuvuvukala, noma ukulimala kwesikhumba enganeni, ngokuqinisekile kuwukuhlukumeza. Ucwaningo luye lwabonisa ukuthi ukushaya ingane kungaphazamisa intuthuko yezenhlalo yengane. Ikakhulukazi, kunganciphisa ukuzethemba kwengane, kunciphise amakhono ayo ezemfundo, futhi kwenze buthaka ubudlelwano bayo namalungu omndeni. Ngaphambi kokuba ushaye ingane, zibuze le mibuzo:

• Ingabe lokhu ngikwenza ukuze ngifundise ingane okuthile noma ukuze ngiyesabise?
• Ingabe ingane iyazi ukuthi ngiyayithanda le ngane?
• Yisiphi isifundo engizama ukusifundisa lo mntwana?
• Ngizokwazi yini ukujabula ngalesi sinqumo kamuva?

Ukuze ufunde kabanzi ngezindlela zokuziqeqesha ezinempilo, khuluma nodokotela wezingane wengane yakho.

Ukuxhashazwa ngokocansi kuyithinta kanjani ingane?

Abacwaningi bathole izici ezithile zezingane ezihlukunyeziwe. Ezinye izindlela zokuziphatha zingase zibonakale kalula, isibonelo:

• Ukuzama ukwenza ucansi olungafanele.
• Izinkinga zomzimba ezivame ukwenzeka njengobuhlungu besisu kanye nekhanda elibuhlungu .
• Ukuqala ukwenza izinto owawuzenza usengumntwana futhi, njengokumunca iminwe nokumanzisa embhedeni.
• Ukubaleka ekhaya.
• Ukuzilimaza (isib., ukuzisika).
• Kubonisa izinguquko ezinkulu ekuziphatheni.

Ezinye izimpawu zingase zibe nzima ukuzibona:

• Ukukhathazeka nokucindezeleka .
• Ubunzima bokufunda nokugxila.
• Ukubonisa izimpawu ze -Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).
• Ukukhubazeka kwentuthuko yemizwa.
• Ukuzenyeza.
• Amaphupho amabi avamile.
• Imicabango noma imizamo yokuzibulala .

Uma ubona izimpawu ezinjengalezi, kufanele ukhathazeke.

Ubani osengozini enkulu yokuxhashazwa?

Ezinye izingane zisengozini enkulu yokuhlukunyezwa nokunganakwa kunezinye. Lezi zici eziyingozi zifaka:

• Izingane eziphila ebumpofwini (izinga lokuhlukunyezwa kwezingane liphakeme ngokuphindwe kahlanu phakathi kwezingane ezivela emindenini enemali engenayo engaphansi kwezinga lobuphofu likazwelonke).
• Izingane ezingaphansi kweminyaka engu-4 ubudala.
• Izingane ezinezidingo ezikhethekile .

Lokhu akusho ukuthi ezinye izingane azixhashazwa, kodwa kusho ukuthi izingane ezikulezi zigaba zisengozini enkulu.

Ubona kanjani ukuthi ingane iyahlukunyezwa?

Izimpawu zokuthi ingane iyahlukunyezwa azibonakali ngaso sonke isikhathi. Ungase uqale uqaphele ushintsho ekuziphatheni kwengane yakho. Noma zingase zisabele ngendlela ehlukile ezimweni ezithile. Uma ukuziphatha noma isimo sengqondo sengane sishintsha ngaphandle kwesizathu esibonakalayo, kungaba uphawu lokuxhashazwa . Nazi ezinye izimpawu:

Izici zomzimba:

• Ebukeka ingcolile futhi inganakwa.
• Ukuba nemivimbo engachazeki, ukusikeka, amanxeba , noma izinkinga zesikhumba ezingapholi.
• Izinkinga zezokwelapha noma zamazinyo ezingalashwanga.
• Ubuhlungu endaweni yesitho sangasese.
• Ukopha kwesitho sangasese ngaphandle kokuya esikhathini kwanyanga zonke .
• Ukuphuma koketshezi noma ubuhlungu obungavamile.

Izici zengqondo/zokuziphatha:

• Ukwesaba umzali oyedwa noma bobabili, noma labo abanakekela ingane (isib., umnakekeli wengane, abasebenzi besikhungo sokunakekela izingane, othisha, abaqeqeshi).
• Ukwesaba umsebenzi noma indawo ethile.
• Ukukhala njalo, noma ukukhala ngezikhathi ezingafanele.
• Ukubuyela emuva kuyindlela yokubuyela ekuziphatheni kwasebuntwaneni.
• Ukuziphatha ngendlela ehlukile kweyabanye abantwana, ikakhulukazi uma kuyishintsho oluzumayo.
• Ukuhlala engekho esikoleni.
• Ukuba wedwa futhi ungabi nabanye.
• Ukuhlukumeza abanye abantwana noma labo abancane kunabo, noma ukuxhashazwa abanye.
• Ubunzima bokufunda nokugxila.
• Ukugwema ukuthintana ngokomzimba nabantu abadala, ontanga, noma abantu abadala kunawe.
• Ukuzama ukwenza izinto kahle kakhulu, noma ukuzama ukujabulisa abanye kakhulu.
• Ukuziphatha noma inkulumo engavamile, evusa inkanuko yobulili, ikakhulukazi ebonakala ivuthiwe ngokweqile noma inhlamba.

Kudingeka siqaphele kakhulu uma sibona izinto ezinje.

Ubani owenza lezi zigigaba?

Ngokuvamile, umhlukumezi ngumuntu omaziyo umntwana futhi osondelene naye. Isibonelo:

• Umzali noma elinye ilungu lomndeni.
• Umngane womndeni.
• Umuntu ozonakekela ingane.
• Noma ubani oseduze nengane (uthisha, umqeqeshi, umholi wenkolo).
• Ontanga noma izingane ezindala eziye zahlukunyezwa bese zilingisa lezo zinto futhi.

Lena yingxenye edabukisayo kakhulu yalokhu. Lezi zinto zingenzeka kubo kanye abantu abathemba ingane.

Kungani abantu benza lokhu kubantwana?

Kunezizathu eziningana zokuthi kungani umuntu engase ahlukumeze ingane:

• Ukuba nomlando wokuxhashazwa ngokwabo: Abazali noma abanye abantu abadala abahlukumeza izingane kungenzeka ukuthi nabo baxhashazwa beseyizingane. Futhi, ngenxa yokuthi nabo baxhashazwa, abanye abantu bayalingeka ukubuka izingane zabo zixhashazwa. Kodwa-ke, akubona bonke abantu abaxhashazwayo abahlukumeza abanye. Iningi labo alizilimazi izingane.
• Ubunzima bokunakekela izingane: Abanye abantu abadala bahlukumeza izingane zabo ngoba abazi ukuthi bangazijezisa kanjani noma ngoba banamathemba angewona aweqiniso ngokuziphatha kwezingane zabo .
• Ukulawula intukuthelo: Abanye abahlukumezi ngabantu abathukuthelayo lapho kukhona okungahambi kahle. Bangase babe nezinkinga emndenini, ngemali, emsebenzini, noma ebuhlotsheni. Lokho kukhungatheka nentukuthelo kungaholela ekuziphatheni okunobudlova. Ngezinye izikhathi, babona ingane njengomthombo wenkinga, ngakho-ke bayalingeka ukuba benze ngokumelene nengane.
• Izimo zempilo yengqondo ezingalashwanga: Abantu abanesifo sokucindezeleka, izinkinga zokusebenzisa izidakamizwa, noma izinkinga zobuntu basengozini enkulu yokuhlukunyezwa kwezingane.

Uma uke wahlukumeza ingane noma wabona izimpawu zokuxhashazwa kwengane, sicela ufune usizo enhlanganweni yezempilo yengqondo yendawo. Ukuthola usizo kungasiza ekuvimbeleni noma ekunciphiseni ukuhlukumezeka kwesikhathi eside kwengane.

Udokotela uziqaphela kanjani lezi zimo?

Udokotela uzohlola ingane ngokucophelela, ebheka izimpawu zomzimba nezokuziphatha zokuxhashazwa. Iziphathimandla zesifunda noma zesifundazwe nazo zingahlanganyela kulolu phenyo. Ukuxilongwa kungafaka:

• Ukuhlolwa komzimba.
• Ukuhlolwa kwelebhu (njengegazi, ukuhlolwa komchamo).
• Ama-X-ray noma ezinye izivivinyo zezithombe.

Ithimba lokuxilonga lenza okulandelayo:

• Ubuza ngomlando wezokwelapha nokukhula kwengane.
• Uqaphela ukuziphatha kwengane kanye nokusebenzisana kwayo nabazali noma abanakekeli.
• Ukhuluma nabazali noma abanakekeli.
• Uma kungenzeka, khuluma nengane.

Iyiphi indlela yokwelapha ingane ehlukunyeziwe?

Uma ingane ilimele emzimbeni, ibonakala ingazi lutho, noma ilahlekelwa ingqondo, kungadingeka usizo lwezokwelapha ngokushesha . Landela udokotela wakho noma ubone uchwepheshe uma kudingeka. Izingane ezihlukunyeziwe zivame ukudinga ukunakekelwa okuqhubekayo kwempilo yengqondo . Ukwelulekwa kanye nokwelashwa kwengqondo kungasiza ekuvimbeleni ukuhlukunyezwa esikhathini esizayo futhi kunciphise umonakalo wesikhathi eside. Ngesikhathi seseshini yokwelashwa kwengqondo,Umeluleki wezempilo yengqondo ufundisa izingane ukuzethemba, zakhe ukuzethemba kwazo, futhi azifundise ubudlelwano obunempilo kanye namasu okuphatha izingxabano.

Khumbula, ukwelashwa kuyazuzisa nabazali. Kungabasiza ukuba babhekane nesimo, bathole izimbangela eziyinhloko zokuxhashazwa, futhi bafunde amasu okukhulisa izingane anempilo.

Ukubika kanjani ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane?

Uma ubona izimpawu zokuhlukunyezwa kwengane, noma uma kwenzeka ekhaya lakho, thatha isinyathelo ngokushesha .

• Khuluma nengane yakho: Khuluma nengane yakho uma ubona ushintsho ekuziphatheni kwayo, noma uma iqala ukusabela ngendlela entsha ecasulayo. Ukukhulumisana okuvulekile nobungane (ngaphakathi kwemingcele enempilo) kuzovumela ingane yakho ukuthi ikwethembe futhi izizwe ikhululekile ukukutshela uma izizwa ingaphephile. Tshela izingane zakho ukuthi zingesabi ukukutshela izinto, noma ngabe zicabanga ukuthi kuzolimaza othile.

• Cela usizo: Ungavumeli ukwesaba noma amahloni akuvimbele ekuceleni usizo. Uma ubika ukuhlukunyezwa eziphathimandleni, igama lakho ngeke labiwe nomndeni noma umuntu ohilelekile. Uma usola ukuthi ingane iyahlukunyezwa, shayela ucingo noma uxhumane:
• Uma ingane isengozini esheshayo , shayela ku-119 (inombolo ephuthumayo yamaphoyisa aseSri Lanka).
• Igunya lakho lendawo lokuvikela izingane, amaphoyisa, noma isibhedlela .
• Inombolo yocingo oluphuthumayo ye-National Child Rights Promotion Bureau (NCPA) ingu-1929. Lokhu kusebenza amahora angama-24 ngosuku.
• Udokotela wezingane angakuthumela futhi uma kwenzeka ukuhlukunyezwa kwengane.
• Umeluleki wenkolo noma ongokomoya anganikeza iseluleko nokusekelwa.

Kufanele futhi wenze lezi zinto:

• Gcina ingane kude nomhlukumezi kuze kube yilapho iziphathimandla zaziswa.
• Noma yibuphi ubuhlobo besikhathi esizayo nalowo muntu kufanele bube ngaphansi kokuqondisa kwakho.
• Ungalokothi usongele umuntu osolwa ngokuhlukumeza noma uthathe umthetho ezandleni zakho.

Uma ukholelwa ukuthi uhlukumeze ingane, noma usengozini yokuhlukunyezwa:

• Khuluma nomngane, ilungu lomndeni, kanye nochwepheshe wezempilo.
• Qiniseka ukuthi ingane iphephile futhi ikude nawe ngalesi sikhathi.
• Thola umeluleki ongaqonda imizwa yakho futhi akusize ubhekane nayo.

Kuyini lokhu 'kuvunyelwa ukuhlukunyezwa kwengane'? (Kuyini ukuvunyelwa ukuhlukunyezwa kwengane?)

'Imvume yokuhlukunyezwa kwengane' inqubo esiza umuntu ukuthi afakazele ukuthi akasona isigebengu. Kwamanye amazwe, abazali abakhulisa izingane badinga lolu hlobo lwemvume. Futhi, uma ufuna ukusebenza nezingane noma ukuzithandela, ungase udinge 'imvume yokuhlukunyezwa kwengane'. Lena yingxenye yenqubo yokufaka isicelo esiza abaqashi ukukhetha abasebenzi abafanelekile. Le mithetho iyahlukahluka kuye ngamazwe.

Liyoba yini ikusasa lezingane ezihlukunyeziwe?

Izingane ezihlukunyezwayo zingase zibhekane nalokhu okulandelayo:

• Ukulimala okusheshayo, okuhlanganisa ukusikeka, imihuzuko, kanye nokuphuka kwamathambo.
• Ukulimala okuvamile.
• Izinselele zokufunda.
• Izinkinga ezingokomzwelo, ezingokwengqondo, nezokuziphatha, okuhlanganisa nokucindezeleka.
• Ukukhathazeka kanye nobunzima ngamakhono okuxhumana nabantu.
• Ukwesaba abantu abadala noma izindawo ezithile.

Uma kungelashwa, ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane kungaba nemiphumela yesikhathi eside ezinganeni. Abantu abadala abasindile ekuhlukunyezweni kwezingane banamathuba amaningi okuthuthukisa izinkinga zomphakathi nezemizwa.

Bona:

• Ungalimaza abanye noma wamukele ukulinyazwa.
• Ungazama ukuzibulala.
• Unganakekela abanye ngaphandle kokukhathazeka ngenhlalakahle yakho.
• Izinkinga zocansi zingavela, njengokuzibandakanya ekuziphatheni okuyingozi ngokocansi, ukuba matasa kakhulu ngokocansi, noma ukugwema ucansi ngokuphelele.
• Kungaba nzima ukuthemba abantu.

Abasindile bangase babe nezinkinga zezokwelapha nezokuziphatha lapho sebekhulile, njenge:

• Ubuhlungu obungapheli, ikhanda elibuhlungu nsuku zonke, i-Fibromyalgia, kanye nobuhlungu besisu.
• Ukucindezeleka.
• Ukuzenyeza.
• Izinkinga zokusebenzisa izidakamizwa noma zokusebenzisa utshwala.
• Ukucindezeleka okunobuthi kungathinta ukukhula kobuchopho futhi kwandise ingozi ye-PTSD nezinkinga zokufunda, ukunaka, kanye nenkumbulo.

Ungakuthuthukisa kanjani ukululama kwesikhathi eside kwengane ehlukunyeziwe?

Thola umeluleki wezempilo yengqondo . Ukwelapha kungasiza ingane ukuthi icubungule okwenzekile, ifunde ukwakha ubudlelwano obuhle, futhi inciphise imiphumela yesikhathi eside yokuhlukunyezwa. Ukuphatha umthelela wemizwa wokuhlukunyezwa kungathuthukisa nempilo yomzimba yezingane yesikhathi eside.

Uyisiza kanjani ingane ekutshele ngokuxhashazwa?

Uma ingane ikutshela ngokuxhashazwa, yithathe ngokungathi sína . Ungakuthathi njengento encane noma ucabange ukuthi iyadlala noma iyaqamba amanga. Yenza lezi zinto ukuze uvikele ingane yakho:

• Khuthaza ukukhulumisana okuvulekile, lalela ingane yakho lapho ikhuluma, yivumele ichaze okwenzekile ngamazwi ayo, uyiduduze, futhi uyikhumbuze ukuthi ukhona ukuze ukhulume noma ulalele.
• Khumbuza ingane ukuthi akulona iphutha layo ; ayinacala ngokuhlukunyezwa.
• Hlukanisa ingane nomhlukumezi bese uqinisekisa ukuthi ingane iphephile.
• Xhumana nodokotela ongakuqondisa ezinyathelweni ezilandelayo.
• Thola ukwesekwa okwengeziwe, njengokwelulekwa, ukwelashwa, noma amaqembu okusekela.
• Yiba nesineke - izingane ziphola ngesivinini esingafani; sekela ingane yakho kuyo yonke inqubo yokuphola.

Yimiphi imibuzo okufanele uyibuze udokotela wakho wezingane?

Uma ingane yakho ihlukunyeziwe, khuluma nodokotela wezingane. Buza le mibuzo:

• Yikuphi ukwelashwa ngokomzimba ingane yami edingayo manje?
• Uhlobo luni lokwelapha oluzosiza ingane yami?
• Ingabe ukwelashwa komndeni kuzosisiza?
• Ngingamsiza kanjani ingane yami ukuthi ilulame?
• Ingabe kukhona izinto okungafanele sizenze noma sizisho?
• Ngingayivikela kanjani enye ingane yami?

Okokugcina, into ebaluleke kakhulu

Ngeshwa, ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane kuvamile. Izingane ezihlukunyezwayo zisengozini yezinkinga zempilo zamanje nezesikhathi esizayo. Kodwa-ke, kunethemba lokululama . Funda ukuqaphela izimpawu zokuhlukunyezwa kwezingane, njengokuthi ingane iziphethe ngendlela exakile noma ehlukile. Uma usola ukuhlukunyezwa, vikela ingane yakho kumhlukumezi futhi ufune usizo lochwepheshe. Izinsizakalo zempilo yomzimba neyengqondo zingasiza ekunciphiseni imiphumela yesikhathi eside yokuhlukunyezwa kwezingane. Khuluma nodokotela wakho (noma udokotela wengane yakho) ngezindlela zokuyeka nokuvimbela ukuhlukunyezwa kwezingane. Izingane zethu ziyikusasa lethu, futhi kungumthwalo wethu wemfanelo ukuzivikela.

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Ukuhlukunyezwa kwengane , ukuhlukunyezwa kwengane, ukuvikelwa kwengane, impilo yengqondo, ukunakekelwa kwengane, izimpawu zokuhlukunyezwa kwengane, ukucela usizo