Engkim hi ‘Perfect’ a nih a ngai em? Hei hi a hlauhawm lam a awm (Perfectionism) .

Eng thil pawh ti se, a famkim a ngai a, tihsual tlemte pawh nei lova ngaihtuah mi i hria em? Chutiang bawk chuan nang pawhin i hre ve mai thei. Thil pakhat dik tak, tlin lohna awm lovin tih chu thil tha tak angin a lang thei a, mahse a takah chuan hei hi stress thlentu leh kan nun tichhe thei thil a ni. Vawiin hian he rilru dinhmun ‘engkim hi a famkim vek tur a ni’ tih hi kan sawi a, chu chu Perfectionism .

Perfectionism chu eng nge ni tak tak?

A awlsam zawngin, engkim famkim neih, famkim, midangte’n famkim anga an ngaih mamawhna nasa tak hi a ni. Mahse hei hi theihtawp chhuah tum nen a danglam hle. I theihtawp chhuah tum hi hrisel a ni. Mahse perfectionism hi rilru natna (negative state of mind) a ni a, chutah chuan mahni in pressure i siam a, thil tum tak tak i siam a, chu chu i thlen loh chuan i lungngai leh thin.

Perfectionism hi chi hnih lian tak a awm a. An pahnih hian tehfung sang tak an siam a ni. Mahse, maladaptive perfectionist-te chuan chutiang thil tum an hlen chhuah loh chuan stress nasa tak an tawk thin.

Research -a a lan dan chuan he dinhmun hi chi thum a awm a:

• Self-oriented Perfectionism: Mahni atanga famkimna beisei.
• Other-oriented Perfectionism: I chhehvela mi (chhungkaw, thiante, hnathawk) atanga famkimna beisei.
• Khawtlang nunphung (Socially-prescribed Perfectionism): Khawtlang emaw midang emaw nawrna hnuaia mi famkim tura beih tlat.

Eng type pawh ni ila, i chungah dan khauh tak, khauh tak i siam a ni. Hei hian a thatna aiin chhiatna a thlen tam zawk a ni. Eng nge an nih i en ang u.

1. Hun sawn hlat leh productivity tlahniam

Engkim felfai leh famkim taka tih tumtute hian an hun sawn hlat fo thin hi thil mak tak a ni. Chu chu an productive lo tihna a ni. Engvangin nge chu chu?

Project lian tak tih tur i nei tih han ngaihtuah teh. Perfectionist i nih angin 100% dik taka tih i tum a, a te ber pawh nise. Mahse engtiang chiahin nge a famkim tur tih pressure chuan project tan chu a ti hlau hle. "Aw, ka ngaihtuah angin ka famkim ngai lovang," tiin i ngaihtuah a, a tawp thlengin project tan chu i sawn hla ta a ni.

2. Rilru chak lohna leh lungkhamna nasa tak

Perfectionist i nih angin i kekawrte chungah pressure nasa tak i phur a ni. Hei hi mahni inngaihtuahna a ni thei a, khawtlang atanga lo chhuak nia i ngaih thil pawh a ni thei bawk. Hetianga pressure nasa lutuk hian rilru lamah a tichak lo hle thei che a ni. Hei hian rilru lama harsatna dang tam tak kawng a hawng a ni.

Chung zinga ṭhenkhat chu:

• Lungkhamna leh lungngaihna
• Mahni intihhlum tumna
• Mahni chauhna
• Dawhtheih lohna leh lungngaihna
• Thinrimna
• Obsessiveness leh compulsiveness te hi a ni

Chu bâkah, Imposter Syndrome tih natna i vei thei bawk. Hei hi, "He hna, he hna, he inzawmnaah hian ka tling lo. Midang angin ka tha lo. Mi ka bum a ni," tih ang chi i hriat hun a ni. Heng ngaihtuahnate hian hnathawhnaah emaw, i zirlaiah emaw i thiamna a tikhawlo thei bawk.

3. Lungkhamna leh Depression

Perfectionism leh anxiety/depression inkarah hian inzawmna nghet tak a awm a. I tâna tehfung sâng tak i siamte i tlin loh chuan, i rilru hahna leh lungkhamna chuan lungkhamna a thlen thei a ni. Hetiang dinhmun hi a la awm zel chuan lungngaihnaah a chang thei a ni.

Mi thenkhat chuan pawn lam atanga heng rilru put hmang hi an lantir lo. An lungkhamna te, lungngaihna te, lungngaihna te chu an thup a, nuihzatthlak ‘ famkim’ tak an pu thin. Hei hi dinhmun hlauhawm tak a ni. A chhan chu nun hi i lungawi lo a, mahni intihhlum tumna i nei a nih pawhin tumahin an hre lo. I hlutna nei lo niin i inhria mai thei.

Heng rilru put hmang hi i lo hre ve a nih chuan khawngaihin nangmah chauhin hrehawm tuar suh. I rintlak tak nen inbia ang che. A nih loh leh i doctor hmu la, he thil hi sawipui ngei ang che.

4. Taksa hriselna lama harsatna nei

He stress hian taksa a nghawng thei bawk. Mi thenkhat chuan ei leh in lama harsatna an nei thei. Entirna pakhat chu Orthorexia Nervosa hi a ni. Hei hi mi pakhatin a ei leh in chungchangah dan khauh tak, khauh tak a neih a, chu ei leh in dan atanga tlemte pawh a inthlak danglam chuan sualna leh lungkhamna nasa tak a neih lai a ni.

Hetianga nunah engkim thunun a ngaihna nasa tak hian a chang chuan Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) a thlen thei a ni.Rilru natna, perfectionism an tihah pawh a lo thang lian thei bawk. Perfectionism hi thunun duhna nasa tak a ni. Chu thununna chu a bo chuan rilru lama harsatna dang a lo chhuak thei a ni.

5. Mihring inlaichinna tihbuai

A rah chhuah pawi tak dang chu i chhûngte, i kawppui, leh i ṭhiante nêna in inlaichînna a tihbuai hi a ni. Hei hi nangmah atanga i beisei ang bawka mi dangte hnen atanga tehfung sang tak ‘perfect’ i beisei a nih chuan a dik hle a, chu chu harsatna lo chhuahna hmun a ni.

I kawppui thil tih tenawm ber berte pawhah dik lohna i hmu mai thei. I fate lakah beiseina dik lo i nei mai thei. Hnathawh hmuna mi dangte hnathawhah i lungawi lo mai thei. Hei hian i chhehvela mite chungah pressure nasa tak a siam thei a, i hnen atanga an inhlat tir thei bawk. Hei hi eng inzawmna atan pawh a hrisel lo.

6. Tunlai huna nung thei lo

Perfectionist rilru chu a thawk reng a ni. Present moment ah i awm lo, i lu ah i awm. Tun hmaa thil thleng chungchangah i phunnawi emaw ("Tlem ka ti tha zawk ta se..."), a nih loh leh nakin lawkah thil famkim taka tih dan tur i ruahman emaw a ni.

Hei hian tunlai hun hlimna leh thlamuanna chu a hloh phah a ni. Thian i biak lai te, chhungte nena hun i hman lai te, hmun mawi tak i tlawh lai te hian i rilru a awm lo. Hei hian mahni chauha awm leh lungngaihna a tizual bawk.