Ngaba umntwana wakho akahlali kwindawo enye? Ngaba uhlala uvakalelwa kukuba akahoyi nto okanye akakumameli? Okanye ngaba ngequbuliso ucaphuka ngenxa yezinto ezincinci? Ngenxa yale ndlela yokuziphatha, usenokuba utyholwe zizalamane, abahlobo, okanye nesikolo, besithi, "Umntwana wakho akaziphathi kakuhle." Ukuba nawe ukhe wajongana namava anjalo, eli bali liza kuba kufutshane nawe. Kuba namhlanje siza kuthetha ngezinye zezinto abazali babantwana abaphila ne-ADHD, okanye i-attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, abanazo ezingqondweni zabo, kodwa abazange bakwazi ukuxelela uluntu.
Umntwana wam akangomntwana "ombi"!
Abanye abantwana abane-ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) banengxaki yokuhlala kwindawo enye, oko kuthetha ukuba basebenza kakhulu. Abanye bacinga ukuba benza izinto ngaphandle kokunikel’ ingqalelo, oko kuthetha ukuba banomdla kakhulu. Aba bantwana banokuba nobunzima bokulandela imiyalelo nokulawula iimvakalelo zabo. Ngoku, xa umntwana onezi mpawu eziphatha kakubi, sicinga ukuba uzama ngabom ukusenza sicaphuke okanye angasimameli. Kodwa oko akuyonyani.
Aba bantwana baphila notshintsho kwindlela esebenza ngayo ingqondo. Asikuko ukuzikhethela kwabo.
Omnye umama uthi, “Kundiphatha kakubi kakhulu xa abanye abazali bejonga abantwana bethu baze bababize ngokuba ‘ngabantwana ababi.’” Bobabini abantwana bakhe bane-ADHD. Uthi xa umntwana onje ngequbuliso ecaphuka, enomsindo, aze akhale (edakumba), bazama ngokwenene ukusixelela indlela abavakalelwa ngayo. Kodwa abazi ukuba bakwenze njani. Nje ukuba bafunde loo ndlela, abo bantwana bayatshintsha ngeendlela abangenakuzicinga.
I-ADHD ayiphuhli ngenxa "yeempazamo zabazali"!
Le yenye yezona ngcamango zimbi kakhulu kuluntu. Xa bebona ukuziphatha kakubi komntwana, abantu abaninzi bakhomba umama notata ngomnwe. Usenokuba ukhe weva amabali anje ngokuthi "umntwana akakhuliswanga kakuhle," "ukuphathwa kakubi kakhulu," kunye "nokungabikho kwengqeqesho."
Kodwa iingcali zithi eyona nto ibangela i-ADHD yimfuza . Oko kukuthi, izuzwe njengelifa. Ngoku kuye kwaqinisekiswa ukuba le meko ayibangelwanga yimpazamo evela kumama okanye kutata.
Ibali likamama wonyana oneminyaka elishumi elinanye ojongene ne-ADHD, i-autism, kunye nexhala libaluleke kakhulu.
"Abantu abaninzi bacinga ukuba i-ADHD ligama elibekwa ebantwaneni ngendlela embi. Kodwa ayingombandela wobuzali. Leyo yeyona ngcamango iphosakeleyo malunga ne-ADHD."
Omnye umama uthi, "Kukho ukuhlaziswa okukhulu ngabazali kule nto. Abantu bacinga ukuba, 'Kufuneka ukuba wenze into engalunganga.' Omnye umama wakha wathi kum, 'Kufuneka ukuba umvumele abukele iTV kakhulu esemncinci.' Ndacinga ukuba, 'Oko akunangqiqo.'"
I-ADHD yimeko yokwenyani.
Oku akuyonto yokuhlekisa okanye into eqanjiweyo. Oogqirha kunye namaziko ezempilo kwihlabathi liphela bayamkele le nto njengengxaki yokwenyani yezonyango. Kodwa abanye abantu basayithandabuza loo nto.
Umama othile wathumela unyana wakhe one-ADHD kwinkampu. Nangona wayenike abaququzeleli icebiso malunga nendlela yokulawula imeko yonyana wakhe, akukho mntu wayekholelwa kwi-ADHD kwinkampu. Ngenxa yoko, unyana wakhe kwafuneka ajongane nobunzima obuninzi kwinkampu.
Ngoko ke ukuba abantu abangaqondiyo le meko bayayifunda, baya kukwazi ukubajonga abo bantwana ngovelwano. Emva koko, abantwana baya kuziva besithi, "Abantu abadala bayandiqonda, bakwicala lam." Loo ntembeko ixabiseke kakhulu kubo.
| Iingcamango ezingachanekanga kuluntu | Inyani yezonyango |
|---|---|
| Oku "kukuziphatha okubi" ngabom. | Hayi, olu luphawu olubangelwa kukutshintsha kwendlela esebenza ngayo i-neurotransmitters engqondweni. |
| Oku kubangelwa yimpazamo yabazali. | Hayi, i-ADHD ibangelwa ikakhulu zizinto zemfuza kunye neemeko ezingqongileyo. Asikuko ukuba abazali banengxaki. |
| Ungayilungisa le nto ngokuyibetha, ukuyithethisa, nokuyohlwaya. | Isohlwayo asigcini nje ngokonakalisa ukuzithemba komntwana, kodwa asinyangi neempawu. Singenza imeko ibe mandundu. |
| Aba bantwana bangamavila kwaye abanamdla. | Oku akubangelwa kukudinwa, kodwa kunoko kuba ingqondo ingakwazi ukugcina ingqalelo kunye nokucwangcisa imisebenzi. |
Le meko ayinakulungiswa ngesohlwayo.
Ukumiswa esikolweni ngenxa yengxaki yokuziphatha komntwana akuqhelekanga kwilizwe lethu. Omnye umama uthi unyana wakhe wamiswa esikolweni iintsuku ezili-10 kwisithuba seenyanga ezintathu xa wayekwibanga lesithathu. Wayechazele isikolo ukuba ukuxakeka konyana wakhe kunye nokungakhathali kwakhe kwakuyinxalenye yemeko yakhe ye-ADHD, kodwa abazange bayiqonde loo nto.
“Ndingathanda ukuba izikolo zigxile kakhulu ekufumaneni unobangela wokuziphatha nokufunyaniswa kwezisombululo zako endaweni yokohlwaya. Abo bantwana abafundi nto ngokuyekiswa emsebenzini,” utshilo. Abanye ootitshala bacinga ukuba “ukubabetha kakhulu” kuya kuphelisa ezi zenzo zingafanelekanga. Kodwa oko kwenza umntwana adandatheke ngakumbi.
Ingcebiso yokukhulisa abantwana esebenza kuwo wonke umntu ayisebenzi kubantwana abane-ADHD
Nangona abazali bethu besikhulise ngendlela yakudala ethi "yenza oko ndikuthethayo", ezo ndlela azisebenzi xa sikhulisa umntwana one-ADHD. Kufuneka sibe nomonde kakhulu kwaye sibe bhetyebhetye xa sifundisa umntwana. Kufuneka sifikelele apho umntwana akhoyo size sithethe naye ngendlela ayiqondayo.
Ngokufanayo, icebiso elisebenza kumntwana ongena-ADHD lisenokungasebenzi kwaba bantwana. Usenokuba ukhe weva icebiso elifana nelithi, "Umntwana wam akayi kukhula ngolo hlobo," okanye "Zama itshati yezitikha." Nangona eli cebiso lisenokuba linenjongo entle, alifanelani neemfuno zomntwana one-ADHD.
Ukukhulisa umntwana one-ADHD kunzima kakhulu.
Abanye abazali bachitha ixesha elininzi kunye namandla bezama ukwenza inkqubo eqhelekileyo yomntwana wabo, bephanda ngayo, bebona oogqirha, kwaye bekhangela ulwazi kwi-intanethi.
“Kuyadinisa ngokwenene,” utshilo omnye umama. “Ngamanye amaxesha konke kuvakala ngathi kuyandoyikisa. Ndivakalelwa kukuba andenzeli konke okusemandleni am unyana wam, ukuba ndingumntu osileleyo. Kunzima kakhulu ukunyamezela loo mvakalelo.”
"Yonke imihla yinto entsha. Olu hambo alulula - kodwa singayoyisa le nto," utshilo omnye umama.
Eyona nto ingcono kukuba unyango lokuthetha, kwaye ukuba kuyimfuneko, amayeza anikwe ngugqirha anokunceda umntwana wakho ukuba alawule i-ADHD yakhe. Kwakhona, iSicwangciso seMfundo esiHlanganisiweyo (i-IEP) senzelwe ukuhlangabezana neemfuno zokufunda zomntwana.Ungabuza isikolo somntwana wakho ngale nto. Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukuthetha nogqirha wosapho lwakho okanye ugqirha wezingane ngayo yonke le nto.
Kukho umbala wesilivere kwilifu ngalinye elimnyama.
Phakathi kwazo zonke ezi ngxaki, kusenokukuhenda ukucinga ukuba i-ADHD ayisiyonto imbi nje. Abanye abazali bathi abantwana babo banezakhono ezikhethekileyo ngenxa ye-ADHD.
- Ukucinga ngaphandle kwebhokisi
- Ukujonga izinto ngendlela entsha
- Ukugxila kakhulu kwisihloko esinomdla
“Akukho mntu uthetha ngezinto ezilungileyo nge-ADHD,” utshilo omnye umama. “Oku kungenxa yokuba inkqubo yethu yemfundo kunye nehlabathi azidalelwanga ukwamkela abo bangaphandle kwesiqhelo.”
Ngoko ke, ngelixa uqonda iingxaki zomntwana wakho, ungalibali ukuxabisa izakhono zakhe ezikhethekileyo.
Umyalezo Wokuya Ekhaya
- I-ADHD ayilotyala lokuziphatha kakubi komntwana okanye abazali bakhe. Yimeko eyaziwayo ngokwezonyango ebangelwa kukutshintsha kwendlela esebenza ngayo ingqondo.
- Isohlwayo asiyi kuyinyanga le meko. Endaweni yoko, into umntwana ayidingayo luthando lwakho, ukuqonda kunye nenkxaso yakho.
- Ayizizo zonke iingcebiso ezisebenzela abantwana abaqhelekileyo eziya kusebenza kumntwana one-ADHD. Kubalulekile ukufumana indlela esebenzela umntwana wakho.
- Ukuba uvakalelwa kukuba olu hambo luyadinisa, ungabi nantloni ngalo. Cela uncedo. Thetha nogqirha wakho okanye umgqirha wengqondo uze ufumane unyango olufanelekileyo kunye neenkonzo zokunika iingcebiso.
- Njengoko ujonge imingeni yomntwana wakho, qaphela kwaye uxabise izakhono zakhe ezikhethekileyo kunye namandla akhe.
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